Oikawa Headcanons - Blog Posts

How long are Haikyuu boys’ dick in inches?

A/N:This has been sitting in my drafts for almost a year lmaooo let me get rid of it

Seijoh Four

Iwaizumi + Oikawa + Hanamaki + Matsukawa

Oikawa’s dick is so pretty. It’s long slender but definitely packs a punch. He is around 7 inches. His dick is so smooth and feel like absolute heaven sliding into you. The tip of his picklocks so pink and pretty especially when its dripping with pre-cum. He always keeps the hair around it short because he likes a neat clean cut. This man has an entire set he uses to shave and trim the hair. He likes to cockwarm your mouth with his dick. He just get a thrill off seeing you hot and ready practically begging him to fuck your mouth. Once he’s fucking into your mouth there’s no stopping him. He wants you to take all 7 inches of him until he’s spurting warm cum down your throat.

Hanamaki’s dick is everything. It’s so pretty and veiny His dick is around 6.5 inches and he definitely knows how to use it. This man could have you shaking with just one stroke. He’s so cocky about his dick because he knows it’s pretty and he knows he can make you cum. This tip of his dick is so thick and pretty, he can fuck you with just the tip and have you creaming.If you’re wondering, yes the drapes match the curtains. Hanamaki definitely doesn’t shave as much as he should but it’s not an unruly mess but, it’s a pink forest down there. He definitely fucks you nice and slow with it because he want you to feel every inch of him. He needs to see the way your eyes roll back every time he dips the tip of his dick inside of you just to tease you because we all know he likes to be a little tease.

Iwaizumi’s dick is so thick and long. This man has a veiny dick that looks so delicious and it will definitely stretch you out. He’s around 7.5 inches. At first he definitely had some unruly hair but Oikawa made him buy trimming tools with his and now he keeps it down to a decent cut. He doesn’t like the bald look. The tip of his dick is so thick and pink and practically always drooling with precut. He’s so thick and long he doesn’t mind having to hold your hips in pace because he knows how hard it can be to take all of him. Don’t expect him to go soft on you though because he shows no mercy, his dick is big and he’ll show you exactly how he puts it to use

Matsukawa’s dick shouldn’t even need an explanation. He’s so thick and big its almost unbearable…almost. This man is around 9 inches maybe more. He is definitely touching the cervix without even being fulling in. He’s so thick and veiny and has god sent sex skills. The way this man can leave you trembling and begging for more without even fully having his dick inside of you is like magic. Matsukawa is cocky because he knows his dick is big and he doesn’t need anyone to tell him that. He is an absolute menace. He likes seeing your face scrunch up when he’s stretching your hole. He likes to make you look at yourself while he fucks you just so you can see how fuck out of it you get because of his dick so of course that means mirror sex.

Pretending to Moan Another Guy’s Name (Haikyuu!! Headcanons)

*GIFs not mine*

A/N: Hehehe, I’m s i c k. Anyways, here’s a rly long headcanon that I’ve been thinking about writing for a while. Some are short and some are long, but hey, that’s life🤷‍♀️ Enjoy! (Side note: been a while since I did a milestone, but hey, this one’s huge--happy 4k y’all💜!!)

Word count: 2705

Oikawa Tooru: 

He’s dead silent, waiting to hear that name fall from your lips one more time just to make sure he wasn’t having a nightmare. 

“Ushiwaka…”

Nope. He wasn’t. He pinched himself five times to prove it. 

Oikawa can’t stand the thought of you dreaming about one of his greatest enemies. His hands curl into fists and his bottom lip gets drawn in by his teeth and, if you hadn’t been so busy trying to fend off your own laughter, you might’ve heard the small whine leaving the back of his throat. 

The bed shifts with Oikawa’s weight leaving it imbalanced and just when you prepare yourself to stop him in his tracks with a giggle, the bedroom door slams hard enough to rattle framed photographs of you and him on the walls. 

Okay… so maybe you had gone too far. 

Stunned into silence, it takes you a couple minutes to recover from your boyfriend’s outburst. When you finally find the strength to breach the cold air of one a.m. goosebumps rise along your skin and you decide to wrap a blanket around your shoulders. 

Lord knows damage control with Oikawa always required a solid chunk of time. 

You find him in the kitchen of the apartment, seated on a stool with his elbows propped on the oak-finished island with two fistfuls of hair and a downcast face. 

Unsurprisingly enough, your prank no longer felt like the genius idea you’d thought it was three hours ago. 

“Tooru?” Your voice is small so as to not disturb him, but his lack of movement makes you think you have almost been too successful in your efforts. 

“Tooru,” you move to lay your hand on his shoulder, “please.” However, the second you make contact he flinches away like you’d burned him. The room is silent once more, but as you keep your hand hovering over his back, you hear a quiet sniffle. 

Oh God, what have I done?

Without another word, you grasp both ends of the blanket and wrap both it and yourself around Oikawa, attaching yourself to his back with a tight enough grip that he can’t shake you off, which, trust me, he certainly tries his best. 

Like a fish out of water, he writhes and thrashes in your hold and in that split second that you think How the hell do I get him to stop this? he’s managed to wriggle himself so hard that the stool and you behind him lose balance, toppling to the floor like a Jenga tower. 

“Oh shit!”

Oikawa, ever so graceful, lands directly on top of you, his lean shoulders crashing hard enough into your chest that you wheeze out the oxygen trapped inside. The stool almost spun and clattered right on top of both of you before Oikawa kicked it away hard enough that it crashed against the metal fridge and slid all the way out into the living room. 

In the dead of night, the noises were loud enough to increase the ringing in your ears that had started when your head slapped against the linoleum floor. Oikawa was still squirming against you but for an entirely different reason now. 

“Fuck--YN, YN! Are you okay?” Still sitting on top of you, another breath gets squeezed out of your chest the second Oikawa rolls over to straddle you. One hand lifts your head, palming frantically at your scalp while the other shoves under your shirt to feel your ribs. 

“Could you,” you choke out, “get off me before I answer that?”

A startled scoff leaves his mouth before he slides off you and onto the floor at your side, helping you sit up while still trailing his eyes up and down your form to search for injury. Not that he could see much--the only light in the apartment was filtering through the kitchen window and came from the quarter moon in the sky. 

“I’m fine, I’m fine.” You bat away his hands but can’t stop your own from trailing up and rubbing your temples. “Are you okay?”

It didn’t take a genius to figure out his cheeks were damp with tears. From the way he sniffled to the way he blinked every .5 seconds, you knew tonight had been a sudden emotional roller coaster for him. 

“Yeah,” he glanced away nodding. “Yep, all good here.” 

“Bullshit.”

Oikawa gave you a scandalized stare and all you could do was sigh before scooting over to him, getting settled criss-cross style before palming both of his cheeks and yanking his face down to yours. 

“I know when you’re lying to me, Tooru, and I know exactly why you’re lying to me right now.”

His first instinct was to roll his eyes and pull away, but you pulled him back harder, hard enough that he flashed his wide eyes to yours in surprise. 

“It was a prank, babe.” Ah yes, the words that turn every boy into goo. 

Oikawa clenched his jaw and wrapped his hands around your wrists. “The “yanking me off my stool so I can crush your ribs” thing or the “I’m gonna moan your enemy’s name so you almost have a heart attack and cry enough tears to flood a river” thing?”

“The “I’m gonna moan your enemy’s name so you-’”

Oikawa slammed his lips against yours, effectively drowning out any of the dumb-ass explanations you had waiting on your tongue. 

“Your pranks are always so mean, baby,” Oikawa mumbles against your lips. “Do you know how much it hurt to think that you were dreaming about being with another man?”

“Did it even matter that it was-”

“No,” he pecks your lips once more before rising to his feet and tugging you to yours. “No, the name didn’t matter at all.”

“Well damn, that’s a shame, because I was stuck between moaning Ushiwaka or Kag-”

“Here’s the thing, sweetheart: I don’t wanna hear another name aside from my own come out of your mouth for the rest of the night. Understood?”

“I-”

“Understood?” You sigh. 

“Yes sir.”

Tsukishima Kei:

Ouch.

One long finger pokes into your cheek, hard.

You’d barely even gotten the first two syllables of the ginger’s name off your tongue before Tsukishima was at the ready, stabbing you in the face with a fingernail you were almost positive you’d seen being filed down just hours ago. 

Bastard must’ve been faking it.

“Don’t say that,” Tsukishima grunts out tiredly, accompanying a yawn with yet another jab. 

Part of you wondered if there was a point to even keeping up the act, but the other part was so pissed you almost wanted Tsukishima to worry that it was real. 

You mumbled the random nonsense of the average person waking from a deep slumber and opened your eyes just to squint at the blond in bed beside you. 

“Wha…?”

In pure darkness, you could barely see Tsukishima narrowing his gaze back at you, half because he was pissed and half because he was lacking his glasses. 

He thrusts a finger right in the middle of your forehead. “Don’t ever moan that name again.”

“I don’t even know what you’re talking about.” You fake yawn, closing your eyes before rolling over to have your back face him. 

“I’m not stupid, YN.”

“Are you sure about that, Kei?”

He scoffs. “Fine, then. I’ll play along to this pointless game.”

The mattress quakes as Tsukishima shifts onto his knees, grabbing your hip with a single hand and tugging it hard enough that your back presses flat against the sheets before he throws a leg over your thighs, straddling you with ease. 

“Is this what you wanted?” One hand of his grabs yours, pulling it up above your head. Your breathing is more like gasping at this point as Tsukishima trails his other hand down your side. 

“Were you trying to make me so jealous that I’d do this?”

“Kei…”

“‘Cause, YN, you could’ve just asked.”

At last, your other wrist is trapped and joins the one over your head, Tsukishima’s long fingers easily holding down both of your hands with just one of his. 

“So, do you want to tell me what that shrimp did to you in this “dream” of yours?”

“Kei…” Was it so hard to pull a juicy reaction out of him? You wanted hugs, tears, maybe even a little begging. 

Of course, leave it to Tsukishima to always find a way to be above you. 

Tsukishima can see the fight die in your eyes and his own glow in return. 

“Really,” he hums, “that was all it took?”

“Jackass.” 

“Don’t be a sore loser, YN. Plus, we both know that prank of yours was impractical at best.” He slides off you, returning to his side of the bed and propping himself up on a single elbow to face you. “I’ve heard you moan my name plenty of times in your sleep to know when you’re actually having a wet dream.”

The smirk on his face makes you warm and fuzzy yet angry all at the same time. In retaliation, you jab a finger into his forehead before spinning face away from him once again. “Don’t get too cocky there, Kei. One day I might actually dream about another guy,” you fold your arms, “then what are you gonna do?”

Two arms wind around your stomach before yanking you back into a firm chest, then a single leg creeps between the two of yours. “Please, we both know I’m the only man you even think about.”

Though he sounded so self-assured, the tightness of his grip spoke differently. You reveled in the idea that he was just a bit self-conscious of that fact. Because although you’d never say it to his face...

The smug bastard was always right.

Tendou Satori: 

“Semi,” you moaned.

“Semi,” Tendou mocked. 

“Mmm, don’t stop.”

“Mmm, don’t stop.”

At first, you almost choked on the drool gathering in your mouth the instant you heard Tendou fake-moan along with you. 

Now, it was a contest of how long you could keep a straight face. 

All the lights were on in the room. The blinds were yanked open and the birds chirping out the arrival of morning tweeted from a tree just outside the window. 

You’d woken up when Tendou left to take a shower itching to prank him. At the time, it seemed perfect. 

Now your chest hurt with how much laughter you kept locked inside. The second he stepped out of the bathroom with steam rolling off his body, you decided it was time to put your plan in motion. 

Oh what a mistake it was. 

“More.”

“More.”

Tendou squated right next to your side of the bed, crossed both arms on the mattress just two inches from your face, dropped his chin on top and proceeded to parrot your every word. 

“Harder. More, please Semi.”

“Yeah, harder Semi, you grandpa-haired, shorter-than-me, cries-at-the-Titanic-movie, girlfriend-stealing son of a bitch.”

And just when you sputtered out a breathless laugh, Tendou rose from his crouch and stalked out of the room, towel wrapped over his head and shoulders like a black Sith robe. 

In the kitchen, pots and pans clattered like Tendou was trying to get the attention of the entire city, at one point even walking back and forth in front of the doorway slamming two frying pans against one another. 

“Oh no, I can’t find that spatula!” your boyfriend called out before proceeding to toss out every single appliance in the drawer, allowing them to clang and clash against the wood like they were literally raining from the ceiling. 

What was funny at first was now a major issue for the rest of the apartment complex--it seemed Tendou had gone mad enough that he was risking getting (yet another) noise complaint that would once and for all kick you both out of the building. 

Ever so in a rush, you slid out of the blankets and made haste toward the kitchen down the hall, stopping in the doorway and dropping your jaw at the sight. 

Tendou, maroon eyes flashing with jealousy, held a porcelain plate up over his head with the obvious intent to throw it against the ground and create an even bigger mess. 

Luckily, his eyes darted toward you at the last second. 

“Hey,” he grinned with eyes so wide and hair so frazzled you actually thought he’d gone insane for a split second, “look who’s up!”

“Satori…” you made your way over to him, precarious step by precarious step. Tongs, pizza cutters, and ice cream scoopers littered the floor while all of your pots and pans lay on the countertop in a pile almost up to Tendou’s shoulder, “what the hell is going on?”

His smile faltered for a second before it came back even larger than normal; his eyes, however, stayed darkened. “Just trying to make breakfast! But I couldn’t find that damned griddle we use for pancakes.”

“Probably because we threw it out four months ago.” Uh oh, you’d finally broken him. 

“Oh…”

“Yeah…”

The pandemonium in the kitchen was nothing compared to the frantic look in Tendou’s eyes, though. They flitted up and down, up and down along your body, looking for something you were almost positive wasn’t there. 

Then he spoke. 

“So… how did you sleep?”

Tense. Tight. Deep. The question sounded like someone had strangled it out of him, and you didn’t dare glance up from collecting the appliances littered on the floor for fear of seeing the pain in his eyes. 

“Satori… I’m really sorry.”

“For what?” With arms full of disarrayed utensils, you hesitantly looked towards the sink where you aimed to drop them off, only to find Tendou bent over and waiting to meet your eyes. The words had slipped off his tongue right as you finished your sentence. 

“The moaning… like, when I moaned Semi’s name and stuff.” Maintaining eye contact at this point was basically impossible for you and instead you settled for watching your feet as they shifted your weight nervously. “It was just a prank and I didn’t think it would get to you so bad. I’m sorry. Really.”

The atmosphere in the room grew ten times stiffer, almost choking you up--you never thought such a thing was possible with a relaxed guy like Tendou present. 

Evidently, you were wrong. 

“It was all a joke?”

“Yes.”

“Like, it was just a prank?”

“Yes.”

“To see how I’d react and stuff?”

“Yep.”

“Phew,” Tendou pressed a hand against his forehead and let out a laugh. “Almost lost my cool there.”

Your jaw dropped to the floor and you glanced around at the kitchen. Tendou didn’t seem to mind your temporary shock, though, as he guided you over to the sink to dispose of the utensils before wrapping you in a hug. “Don’t ever,” he grumbled, voice suddenly deeper and huskier, “ever do something like that again.” Then he pulled away. “Now,” Tendou grinned, “how’s about we go out for breakfast?”

You stayed frozen in place, eyes flitting from the floor to Tendou’s suddenly normal smile back to the floor again. 

Then you kicked him in the shin. 

“Ow, what the hell was that for?!”

You sputtered out a laugh from deep in your chest that was bordering on maniacal. “Oh-ho no, I am so not cleaning up this mess. That’s your problem, mister.” Then you pressed a small kiss to his cheek. “I will, however, go pick us up some breakfast and bring it back here though.”

Then you yanked him into a hug and forced his ear to your lips, lowering your tone deeply and darkly. “And this place better be spotless when I come back.” You pulled back with a smile before skipping to the front door and Tendou could only watch with a gleaming grin on his face. 

God, he loved you.

“You better not be going to see Semi while you’re out!” He received the bird in return.

“Love you too, babe!”

He Returns from an Away Game (Haikyuu!! Headcanons)

*GIFs not mine*

A/N: This idea was just too cute I couldn’t pass on it! Don’t know why, I’m just in a really “write-y” mood today. Hope you like it!

Word count: 950

Hinata Shouyou:

He’s the type to jump on you right when he sees you in the airport.

“YNYOUREHEREIMISSEDYOUSOMUCHILOVEYOUCOMEWITHNEXTTIME!”

Talks so goddamn fast you can’t figure out wth he’s saying

Essentially he just freaking wants you to come with him to away games from now on. 

“The hotel room’s big enough! So is the bed!”

Innocent boi doesn’t know what he’s insinuating. 

Literally bouncing and spinning you around the entire time while telling you about the trip. 

At the house he literally wants to help you do everything, hanging around your waist and kissing your cheek every five minutes. 

Baby boi is just a sweetheart who missed you bad. 

Many cuddles to make up for lost time

Kageyama Tobio:

He’s so excited to see you

Like he starts running toward you in the airport but then he feels like he has to play it cool so he slows down and starts whistling. (the definition of “oh shit, act natural”)

When he’s finally in front of you and you hug the life out of him, he has the gall to scoff

“Calm down, I was only gone for a couple weeks.”

But when you pull away he forces you back in. “Not yet tho.”

He’s the one who’s gonna buy you a million souvenirs bc he couldn’t figure out what you liked… even if the game was only a few towns over. 

Kags just wants something for you to remember him by when he’s gone so you don’t forget about him (dumb boi thinks it’s that easy🤦‍♀️)

More cuddles, but just like lowkey ones at night. 

(but when you get up to go to the bathroom he freaks out about you leaving)

(“stay” “I gotta pee” “i don’t care you’re not going anywhere”)

Oikawa Tooru:

Oooh

Ooh

Oh boy this man missed you, like damn

Remember that scene where his lil nephew snitched about him crying after his break up

Yeah… he’s a tearful boi

Like he sees you in the airport waiting for him and he starts tearing up

“YN!” He’s wailing at this point. “IM NEVER LEAVING YOU EVER AGAIN!”

Chills out after getting his solid five minutes of YN hugs. 

“Ok so yeah we kicked ass.”

Takes you out on a romantic date. Flowers, classy restaurant, the works. He wants to treat you well after not being able to see each other for so long. 

Long walks on the beach, watch the sunset. 

This dude is trying to woo you like he did back in high school

And it works

“I missed you” sex on the beach. Nothing beats that. 

Really tho when this guy returns from an away game he’s all about getting right back into the romantic groove with you.

Oikawa’s voice saying “Did you miss me?” w that fucking smirk= 100/10 panties are flying

Bokuto Koutarou: 

Pfft, are you kidding me??

Any away game it’s freaking guaranteed Bokuto facetimed you every goddamn day just bc he couldn’t stand being away from you for too long. 

Even so he still tackles you in the airport. 

It was the one time you looked away from the entrance to check the time on your phone and he still managed to catch you off guard. 

Ever see those videos of a soldier returning home to see his dog? Mmhmm, that’s Bokuto with you

All. Over. You. 

Face nuzzling your neck all during the walk through the airport. 

Hand on your thigh as y’all drive home. 

More “I missed you” sex, and then cuddling for the rest of the day. Like damn. 

When he wakes up the next day and you’re not in his arms, bro literally s o b s

“YN LEFT ME MY LIFE IS OVER!”

You determine there’s not even a point to trying to serve him breakfast in bed anymore considering he’ll immediately notice when you’re not in his arms anymore. 

Even so, morning, middle of the day, and evening cuddles combined with him sticking to you like a koala lasts about a week long (literally attached to your hip 24/7), and then he calms down. 

Until the next away game...

Ushijima Wakatoshi: 

Psshh, you thought he missed you??

FOOL!

Literally approaches you so slowly in the airport.

Like this motherfucker walks in slow motion. 

Customary hug and kiss.

And then you walk out to the car holding hands. 

You get to the car and are trying to get inside but like… h e w o n t l e t g o

“Uhh, Toshi?”

“Hmm?”

You’re just sitting in the car with the door open and he’s standing outside still holding your hand like it’s glued in his. 

“You mind?”

“I have no idea what you’re referencing.”

Five minutes later he’s like “oh yeah, that.”

When you finally start driving home it’s like he’s trying to strangle the steering wheel. White knuckles and if looks could kill, any car in the road would be six feet under. 

At home, all bets are off. And all clothes. 

He just… missed you a lot. 

Waking up at noon the next day in those muscular arms. One of his hands are tracing along your face while the other holds your hip. He’s got that husky morning voice and ruffled hair covers his forehead as he watches you, keeping you flush against his chest. 

A slight twitch in the corner of his mouth.

“I missed you.”

Of course you gotta say it back so you can see that once-in-a-lifetime smile. 

“I missed you too.”

How They Kiss *Captain Edition* (Haikyuu!! Headcanons)

*GIFs not mine*

A/N: Just a short little thing cuz I was feeling big brained. Enjoy!

Word count: 2005

Oikawa Tooru:

On the average day, I think he kisses with a smugness often found in the form of a curled lip. He likes the idea that he has you, and that he knows you’re not going anywhere anytime soon. 

His lips are always soft, smooth with the chapstick he always keeps handy. Most likely cherry-flavored because he likes the slightest pink tint it provides.

Normally, his hands are in your hair. Oikawa likes combing through your strands, almost as if to encourage you to do the same. 

Yes, he adores it when you comb through his hair. Tug on it or just brush through it, whatever you gotta do to give his scalp those eye-rolling sensations. 

The first kiss is never the last, and it’s rarely the highlight of the show. The second kiss is much more wanton; he forces as much passion in it as he can, whenever, wherever.

You’re never the one to open your eyes first; Oikawa prides himself in blowing your mind with a kiss that takes you a moment to process it. Not only that, but he also likes to see the little dazed smile you wear afterwards. No matter how hard it is, he will always force his eyes open just to see your face.

Bokuto Koutarou:

Oftentimes, Bokuto’s kisses are always giddy and filled with smiles. Usually, it’s after a game or a practice. While Oikawa uses kisses for pleasure, the Fukurodani captain uses kisses as greetings. 

It shouldn’t surprise you that you accidentally crash your teeth together or bump each other’s noses from time to time. The pain’s never worth thinking about for long, because as soon as you two find your groove, you’re off to the races. 

Bokuto’s not afraid to be touchy-feely, and God does he love feeling you. His hands will wander for a split second, but, after a few seconds, they always find home on your butt. 

He likes your hands against his chest. It feels like he’s surprised you with the kiss. You usually throw your hands up against his chest to cushion the blow when his lips land on yours, and it works about half the time. 

After a kiss, he separates only to litter your face with small pecks, eating up the little giggle you give off. 

When you guys are at that stage, after every kiss will come along a small “I love you,” said with glowing eyes that deliver the emotions Bokuto couldn’t communicate with words. 

His kisses are always rushed, not too much, but enough to frustrate you when it steals your breath away all too suddenly. His lips are only chapped because he licks them too much in excitement; it’s just another little perk of his you love. 

Terushima Yuuji:

Terushima likes to kiss you whenever he can. He’s got a wide array of kisses, but the one you receive most is heated, and of course a little tongue is mixed in. 

He’s a very optimistic guy, but he can become serious when it’s necessary. Thus, I think his kisses always start with a little “hello” as he presses his forehead against yours, then he waits for you to lean in before he dips his head and responds. There’s the slightest hint of a smile on his face when you two kiss, but it slips away the more intense it becomes. 

Suddenly, it’s heavy breathing as he cups your face, pulling you closer and not wanting to let go. His tongue asks for permission about fifty percent of the time at this point in your relationship, only because he knows that he can drive you up the walls with that piercing of his. 

Your hands fall to his waist, where they clench and unclench depending on how out of breath you are. That one pesky strand of hair on his forehead tickles your own, but you’ve grown to ignore it. 

Finally, when the heated kiss ends, Terushima likes to pull away quickly, smirking and waiting for you to open your eyes in shock. When you do, he drowns himself in the sight of your blown-out pupils.

His thumbs are always a rough texture against your cheek thanks to how often he practices, but Terushima likes to slowly trace them over the curves over your cheeks, almost as if he’s trying to wipe away the flush that’s grown there. He likes the feeling of your heated skin under his fingertips. 

Both of your hearts are racing, and Terushima will let out a little breathless sigh before pulling away completely and capturing your hand in his. “Let’s go home, baby.” He’ll kiss the back of your hand, letting his tongue slip out for a split second and chuckling at the grossed out reaction you always provide. 

Sawamura Daichi:

Daichi hands out kisses sparingly, even in private. On a normal day, he’ll only greet you with a swift kiss to the forehead before holding your hand in his and walking beside you to school.

However, when you do kiss, he’s always gentle. These moments are precious to him, and he would hate to rush them for the both of you just for the sake of a little satisfaction. 

Normally, they happen after a hug. He pulls away from your shoulder and leans your forehead against his, waiting to see you look into his eyes before pressing a soft kiss to your lips. It’s just a preview. 

The second kiss is more drawn out. He presses his lips against yours, and they’re smooth because of the plain chapstick he habitually puts on every morning after waking up. It’s careful, almost like Daichi wants to remember every little detail. 

While one hand tilts your jaw so he can kiss you deeper, the other lies at the small of your back, pressing you that much closer to his chest. 

He likes your hands at the back of his neck, just barely dipping into the hair along his nape. When your fingernails scratch that little spot of his that makes him groan, that’s when he pulls away, hot breath mingling with your own in the miniscule space between your pleased faces. 

Daichi feels like he could never get enough of you, so before pulling away, he’ll press just a small kiss to your lips that you willingly return. The hand on your chin moves to brush away some hair that had fallen into your face, and he’ll push it behind your ear before leading you away, to go home to study or continue the makeout session, whichever option you prefer. 

Kuroo Tetsurou:

Kisses with Kuroo are quick and teasing, usually found between classes and in hallways. 

He’ll sneak up behind you and spin you around by your hips, tugging you into a kiss that quickly muffles your surprised squeal.

As always, you melt into the kiss, letting out a small moan when he teasingly bites on your lower lip. You’ve noticed that over the years, he’s bitten your lips more than you ever had. 

At school, they’re always slow. Kuroo likes taking his time to truly lose himself in it. He doesn’t give in to his wandering hands, not after the most recent time when you punished him for pinching your ass in the middle of the hall right in front of everyone. Two weeks without sex and he was willing to listen to your every demand about PDA.

At home, however, your body is free game. In the privacy of his apartment, Kuroo always has the kiss lead to something more. He lets you know this with an eager swipe of his tongue along your lower lip. After being given permission, he’s instantly inside your mouth and winning the battle for dominance, but he still loves the little fight you like to put up once in awhile. 

Kuroo’s hands during a kiss are always below the chest. They wander your waist, your hips, your ass, about as far as he can get before he decides to take things to the next level. A hand pats the back of your thigh, and that’s the only signal you need to wrap your legs around him and let him carry you to the bedroom. 

When Kuroo pulls away from kisses, it’s almost like he baits you to want more. A string of saliva connects the two of you, and no matter where it lands, he’ll clean it right up. The movement as he separates from you is so slow you don’t even realize he’s gone until you notice that you can breathe once again. Subconsciously, you always chase after him, and you’re slow to open your eyes. 

“Let me see, Kitten.” A thumb brushes on the skin just above your cheek and that’s the sign he wants to see how blissed out you are. The second he sees how blown out your pupils are, his lips attack yours again, aching to taste that much more of you. 

While you know he doesn’t use chapstick or anything on a daily basis, his lips are normally soft. Some days, after a volleyball game or practice, they might be cracked, and only then will you taste the tang of mango chapstick, but other than that, his lips are only naturally soft. 

Ushijima Wakatoshi: 

Kisses with Ushijima are always initiated by you, and you alone. The only time you get him to kiss you first is when you ask, and even then he will occasionally pause millimeters away from your lips and wait for you to cover the remaining distance. 

You wish he would kiss you more though, as he’s surprisingly good at it. 

While in the beginning, you assumed he would be a little clumsy and awkward, Ushijima was basically a natural. Kissing you was like breathing air to him, and took him little to no time to figure out what you liked. 

During a kiss, Ushijima doesn’t really set the pace or care where your hands go. Though, if you were to ask, he would have to admit that he likes your hands on his face. There’s something about you cupping his face and pulling him in that makes him almost want more. 

With his hands, Ushijima’s quite traditional, and they always land on your hips. You like to feel them flinch when you suddenly nibble on his lips or press your tongue against his mouth. 

His lips have the bitter taste of Carmex, and though you’ve begged him to switch to something more appealing, he’s surprisingly unyielding about it. He says it’s healing and beneficial, and there’s really no other purpose for chapstick that matters other than those. 

The average kiss with Ushijima is a little forceful. His lips press against yours almost harshly, and sometimes you wonder if he actually does like it as much as you. There are times where you try to end the kiss but apparently it's much too soon for him. He’ll chase after your lips, and on these rare occasions, a hand will stray from your hips and press against the back of your head, pulling you back in for more. 

When you do manage to separate from Ushijima, he has the cutest little quirk of brushing his nose against yours for just a split second. Don’t bother asking him about it though, as he claims he has no idea what you’re talking about. Still, in these precious moments after the kiss, his face is still as blank as ever, but the hair hanging down on his forehead is ruffled and sticking out wildly. Your hands on his face hide the flush behind them, but if you spread your fingers, the red tint is slightly visible on his tanned skin. 

“How was that? Not too much of a pain, right?”

“I would not consider it a waste of my time if we were to kiss again, I suppose.”

Really, that’s the best response you can squeeze out of him.

Darling Traps Them in a Room to Escape (Yandere Haikyuu Headcanons)

*GIFs not mine*

Sugawara and Kuroo Version

Bokuto, Kageyama, and Kenma Version

Tendou and Hinata Version

A/N: Hey y’all, I just wanted to say I am working on the requests in my box, I promise. Anyways, here’s a little something I wanted to write for me, but I figure maybe some others might like it as well. It’s yandere, bc honestly I just need more yandere Haikyuu content in my life. Enjoy! (Side note: Thanks for 1k followers!)

Word count: 1909

Ushijima Wakatoshi: 

For the first few minutes, the home is filled with a dead silence. You had managed to lure him into your “bedroom” (aka the room where he kept you locked up tight) and trap him inside, blocking the door with the tallest, heaviest furniture you could manage. 

The only audible sounds are you sifting through every drawer within the apartment and you cursing under your breath every time you come up empty. 

Where the hell is it?

The prize of your scavenger hunt? The keys to the door. The keys to your freedom. You see, the door Ushijima held you captive behind wasn’t the issue-- it was the sheer number of locks that lined up above and below the knob. 

Ushijima was a strong man, but he was also smart. He made a door that not even someone of his intimidating stature could break through. 

It was quite effective, too. You couldn’t find the damn key ring that you always heard jingling from your bedroom that signaled his arrival. Every cabinet, drawer, nightstand, anything throughout the apartment was empty of your target. 

“What the fuck?” you hiss, slamming yet another cupboard closed. You’d even climbed the countertops to search above the shelves in the kitchen and in the nearby living room. Nothing.

BANG!

The sudden slam makes you squeal in terror. 

BANG! BANG!

It’s coming from your room. 

Ushijima. 

He’s trying to break out.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

Even you can see from your viewpoint directly across from the hallway that the door is shivering. The hinges are whining with every slam as your kidnapper rams against the barrier with all the strength in his body. 

You don’t make a sound. Your heart is pounding, blood rushing in your ears as you pick through every hiding spot you can think of, hands trembling as you sift through pens, notepads, random things in every office drawer. 

“No, no, no,” you choke out, throat tightening at the booms behind you. 

Then you hear splinters. With a glance behind your back, you notice the door has been cracked in two. 

“NO!” you scream, frantic as ever. Suddenly, the keys no longer matter. You just need to get the hell out of there.

But there’s no windows. Not any that you can fit through. So you charge towards the main door, taking a page out of Ushijima’s book and ramming into it. 

“COME ON!” you cry helplessly, pawing at the door when it doesn’t budge. Not even a shiver. You kick against it, fumble with the locks, twist the knob, do anything and pray to God that it works. 

“YN.” No. A large hand falls on your shoulder, halting your movements. 

“Come on,” you whisper, arms dangling lifelessly at your side. All you can do is stare at your failure. The door is locked, and deep down you know it always will be. Now it will, anyways. Thanks to him. 

“YN,” Ushijima repeats, raising his voice just a notch. He doesn’t even sound angry or pissed. For some reason, it sounded like he pitied you. 

All you can do is give in. That’s it. 

So you turn around and grab two fistfuls of his shirt, slamming your face against his solid chest as you mourn, crying for what could have been, but will never be. 

There’s no will to fight when his hand falls into your hair, petting the strands gently while the other palms the small of your back. 

“You know I hate seeing you cry.” The rumble of his voice is soothing in a way, and part of you instinctively relaxes in his grip. “Come. I’ll make you a nice dinner to calm down and then we can discuss our new sleeping arrangements, since your bedroom is obviously unusable now.”

This man had taken you from your own home and claimed he loved you. But he was a beast, a six-foot monster of pure muscle. How do you escape that? 

Answer: you don’t.

“...Okay.”

Oikawa Tooru: 

“YN come on, you’re being ridiculous.” 

“It’s very cramped in here. Would you mind letting me out, darling?”

“YN, give up. You’re never leaving me!”

His voice was muffled from the closet where you had managed to trap him, stuffing a chair under the knob to keep him in place. 

“Fuck you, Oikawa.” 

“Don’t be like that, YN. Just let me out and we can talk about this!” 

Rolling your eyes, you continued picking at the locks with bent paper clips. At some point, you had seen this in a TV show somewhere, so surely it worked, right?

Honestly, you had no idea what you were doing, but you quite liked the panic that seemed to grow in Oikawa’s voice every second you fumbled with the lock just a bit louder. The smallest clicks made him whine from across the room. 

“YN, please! I love you so much, darling. Just let me out of here and I promise I’ll forget this ever happened. No punishments, I swear.”

Bile crawled up your throat at the words, forcing you to slam your fists against the door in frustration. “Shut the fuck up, Oikawa-”

“Tooru, YN. You know I hate it when you don’t say my name.” 

“Oh I am so gonna kill you!” you seethed, rising to your feet and spinning, throwing a hard heel kick against the door. 

For the first time in twenty minutes, Oikawa shut his trap. Maybe he had found a way out, or maybe he had taken your threat seriously. To be honest, neither scenario was appealing to you at the moment. 

“Y-YN, surely you don’t mean that,” he finally mumbled, sounding crestfallen. “You don’t hate me that much. No, no you don’t. You’re just confused-- you see, you can’t escape because you don’t want to escape.”

“Excuse me?!”

“You don’t want to escape because you love me.” A noise suspiciously akin to that of someone slamming their forehead against a door sounded from Oikawa’s general area. “And I love you too, YN. So just let me out and we can talk about this. You don’t have to be afraid of your feelings for me!”

Oh wow. WOW. This guy was the definition of delusional. 

“Oh Tooru,” you sighed, massaging your temples from an oncoming headache. “How are you so blind?” You draw closer to the closet, noting the excited scrambles behind the door as Oikawa audibly hears you approach. 

“You see, I fucking hate your guts.” 

He chokes on his breath. “N-no. You don’t mean that.” His voice wavers with every syllable. 

“I despise you.”

“No.”

“How sad is it that the one you love absolutely loathes you? Does it hurt to know that I will never love you? To know that you’re the bane of my existence?”

“YN don’t be like this.”

“Because Tooru, how could I love someone who is such a failure?”

“STOP IT! SHUT UP AND LET ME OUT!” 

It was a rush to torture someone who had taken you from your own family. To hear them wilt under your thumb like a pest. 

“Oh I’m sorry Tooru, do you want to be let out? Do you want to escape-”

*click*

Your mind goes blank at the sound. The door.

No. Not that door. This door. 

The chair squeals against the wood floor, being pushed by pure will alone. Simple strength couldn’t do that. And when it’s finally opened to the fullest, Oikawa stands in the doorway, head hanging as his hand drops from the knob. 

You couldn’t move, feeling frozen in fear like your feet were locked in quicksand. Eyes wide, you track Oikawa’s every move while you plead with your own body to do the same. But you couldn’t. 

Did he really just…

Finally, his head straightens up, giving you a chance to see his face. 

Stained with tears, streaks trail down his cheeks, but a small smile has formed from his lips. His pupils are dilated, not even squinting at the change of lighting.

“YN… YN, YN, YN. God, I could say your name for days. Now you say mine.” His voice is overall blank, but there’s a small tinge of encouragement in it and a dash of glee in his eyes. 

“T-Tooru.” Your meek whisper is enough to please him. In an instant, he’s on the move, approaching you and grabbing your hands, pressing them to his face before moaning at the contact. 

“Good girl,” he stares deeply into your eyes, running his lips along the palms of your hands. “Now, it’s almost lunchtime. How about we order in for today?” 

The sudden shift in his attitude… shit. You knew he was insane, but this? Was this even real? Had he completely forgotten what you said??

After seeing what he could do with sheer force of will, you didn’t want to poke that bear. No. You had never heard him so frustrated and broken before. And now, suddenly he’s all hunky-dory, acting as if that phase of utter fear hadn’t just happened.

Who the hell was this guy?

“O-okay.”

He smiles at your agreement. Then he pulls you by your hands towards the living room, sitting on the couch before gently tugging you into his lap. His arms are wrapped around your waist, but the grip is like waves on the beach. Every few seconds, it will tighten as his fingernails dig into your hips, then it will recede and he will loosen up a bit before the action repeats itself.

You can feel his hot breath on your neck and his strong thighs underneath you on the couch. The warmth of it all is almost too much as sweat, nervous or heated, gathers at your brow. Your own hands are folded against your lap, not daring to move.

What happened to the strong girl from a few minutes ago who was trying to escape? The one who was willing to spit at him viciously and throw caution to the wind?

The question was completely valid. But that was before you could see him. For a split second, you forgot he was a grown man, completely and utterly capable of hurting not only you but also your family. It felt so safe to be protected by a wall from him.

Until he broke that of course.

“YN…” Oikawa trails off, waiting for your attention. 

“Yes?”

“Those words from earlier hurt.” Oh God. “You didn’t mean them, right?”

The silence is deafening as he waits for an answer. At first, you thought he was being patient, then his fingertips began digging into your hips enough to cause bruises. 

“No, o-of course not.” His grip doesn’t relent.

“Good. Now tell me you love me.”

This was your fate now. A grown man, no longer the teen who had a childish crush on you in high school, had kidnapped you and you couldn’t escape. Your chest constricted at the thought, and your gaze strays to the door. I was so close.

“YN,” he warns, tone dipping dangerously. Ow, ow, ow.

“I love you, Tooru.” 

A giggle slips out of the man beneath you as his forehead drops to your shoulder. “I love you too, darling!” 

So close.

oikawa headcannons!!

took sewing classes in middle school and never stopped

ALWAYS late on memes

like he’ll say something that was funny two months ago and start laughing at himself and then get awkward when everyone’s just staring at him blankly

you can’t tell me this man doesn’t have the prettiest stretch marks

goes way too far for christmas presents and everyone feels bad when they don’t get him something as thoughtful as he gave them

he loves wigs so much

found out that iwa has a skin care routine and sobbed for half an hour even though he was the one to recommend it to him 

i KNOW he tried to make a youtube channel in middle school and people at school found it and he was so embarrassed he didn’t come to school for a whole week

made chocolate covered pretzels and brought them to practice to hand out after but they all melted in his bag

now he brings prepackaged snacks for everyone instead

decorates his room differently for every season of the year

“no iwa that’s for the SUMMER decor, i can’t have it out during SPRING”

checks the mirror 100 times before leaving the house everyday because yes he wants to look good but also feels like he NEEDS to look good and gets super bad anxiety about if he looks put together or not

collects snow globes and will play the music in them when stressed

tried to tell people he had powers when he was little with terrible magic tricks and about half his class believed him

said he liked doing puzzles once and hasn’t gotten anything else for christmas from his parents since

they have a closet in their house that’s just filled with puzzles

and he and iwa do them together while drinking tea and hot chocolate

loves being home alone so he can sing as loud as he wants

spam texts people when they don’t answer him within 5 minutes

then he feels bad about annoying them

has one of those old radios that he plays when he can’t fall asleep

his alarm clock is ocean sounds

constantly complaining about how his is the hottest room in the house

tells people he doesn’t believe in astrology...but we all know he has his and everyone he knows charts memorized

wants a flower tattoo

when he listens to music he will absolutely be acting out what’s happening in the song

till we meet again | iwaoi

iwaoi hanahaki disease au!!

oikawa caught the hanahaki disease as he slowly discovers his love for iwaizumi. while in the middle of a late night call with one another, oikawa started coughing up petals and blood. iwaizumi, who thought that oikawa was just sick brushed it off as him just having a bad cough. later on, iwaizumi had figured out while visiting oikawa one day, that it was not just a bad cough that night that they were having a late night call. it was the hanahaki disease, that he did not believe in had happened to his very best friend. the friend that he grew up with.

will oikawa be getting the surgery and live a sad, unlovable life, or will he suffer his last weeks seeing his best friend fall in love with the manager of seijoh?

!! cw, read before continuing !! : major character death, heavy angst, mentions of blood, potential character death, cursing, hallucinations, mix of lower case and upper case, incorrect punctuations

word count : 4.6k

oikawa huffed, fishing out his phone from his pockets as he impatiently waited for his friend to answer his messages. he was waiting at the front of the school gates, he remembered he promised to iwaizumi that he would wait for him in front of the school gates so they could walk to class together, but it seems that he was running a bit late.

he was waiting for roughly 15 minutes, his legs starting to give up on him for standing so long. he groaned, moving to get his phone from his pockets again to call iwaizumi, but stopped when he saw a figure walking in the distance.

his eyes lit up, head snapping in iwaizumi's direction to wave and greet him. iwaizumi rolled his eyes, but raised a hand and waved back. oikawa was about to call out to iwaizumi, but the words fell short on his tongue as he watched seijoh's volleyball team manager approach iwaizumi. his huge grin had calmed down to a tight lipped smile, a smile that won't reach his eyes no matter how he tries as he watched them interact.

they chat for a few minutes, slowly making their way to oikawa.

by the time they're reach him, his smile had fully went and gone. his eyes didn't shine as they did earlier as he turned away from them and faced the school, the cracks of the walls seemingly much more interesting than whatever they were talking about.

oikawa started staring off to space, not being able to hear anything around him as he got lost in his own mind.

"oh, oikawa-san! i didn't see you there!" oikawa snapped out of his trance. where was he again? he let his eyes wander for a short while as they landed on the girl in front of him. oh. right. school.

"yeah haha hi" he awkwardly muttered, subconsciously letting his hand rest on the back of his neck.

iwaizumi and the manager chatted for a few more minutes, before they finally said their goodbyes and walked away from each other.

'finally, i was getting bored' oikawa thought monotonously, looking back to iwaizumi who had hearts in his eyes.

oikawa furrowed his eyebrows. what's so special about a girl? i mean, he gets it if it's his mom, or sister, or cousin but? he doesnt get it if they're just a schoolmate.

oikawa heaved a small cough, covering his mouth with his hand as he did so. when he lifted his hand back up there was a pink petal. it looked like a hydrangea petal. he remembered a small conversation that he and iwaizumi had a few years back.

"hey iwa-chan, what's your favorite flower?"

"ha? what, are you gonna get me flowers for my grave or something? i'm not dead yet loserkawa"

"what- no i'm not! i'm just asking because i'm curious! jeez mean iwa-chan." oikawa frowned, rubbing the spot where iwaizumi had hit him

iwaizumi thought for a bit, looking up at the ceiling as he does so.

"well, i suppose i like hydrangea flowers"

"the pink one?" oikawa tilted his head to the side, i curious glint in his eyes.

iwaizumi confirmed that by nodding. 

he wondered where the petal came from. did it fall from a tree? he shrugged it off, nudging iwaizumi's arm as he started walking towards the school. iwaizumi blinked, shaking off his trance, his head snapped towards oikawa, a pink tint to his cheeks. 

"oi! what was that for, shittykawa?!"

oikawa laughed, starting to jog towards the school doors.

"i can see the hearts in your eyes whenever you talk to manager-chan. you like her, don't you, iwa-chan??" oikawa teased as he saw the irk mark on iwaizumi's head grow. he didn't like admitting it, or even acknowledging it, but he knew that iwaizumi, did in fact like their volleyball teams manager. he has talked about her a few times, mentioned her name that even oikawa didn't have the time or care to even remember of.

his smile faltered once more. but when he saw iwaizumi coming at him full charge his grin went back, starting to run away from the devil like iwaizumi.

"damn you shittykawa i told you not to say that outloud!!" oikawa laughed, a little squeak coming out of the end as he tries to escape iwaizumi.

ah, what a peaceful life it is. 

a few weeks later, exams was just right around the corner, pulling at every students heads and giving them a headache. oikawa was no different.

although he did seem smart, which he was, he just wasn't keen in a few subjects.

luckily, iwaizumi liked the subjects oikawa loathed, so he asked if iwaizumi could help him in those subjects, exchanging agedashi tofu or grilled mackerel pike for the help.

iwaizumi agreed, acting all grumpy as oikawa called him through discord.

"yahoo iwa-chan!" iwaizumi grumbled a small greeting, oikawa hearing a bit of shuffling and pages turning.

oikawa chuckled.

"oi, what are you laughing at?"

"it's just the way you act all grumpy about teaching me, but i know you love teaching me cause i'm just so irresistible, arent i iwa-chan?"

"yeah, so irresistibly annoying"

"hey! mean iwa-chan!" oikawa huffed, taking out his notebooks from his bag.

he heard iwaizumi chuckle through his headset, and he smiled.

"so what do you not understand in ap history?"

"uhm, everything?"

"tch, expected from a dumbass like you"

"hey! rude! i'm not a dumbass!" oikawa coughed. petals flowing through his mouth. what was happening?

"oh come on, just admit it loserkawa" iwaizumi chuckled. iwaizumi continued to look through his notebook, not minding how oikawa was coughing so much.

"oi, 'kawa, drink some water dumbass!" iwaizumi half muttered, trying to focus on reading the contents of his notebook.

when the coughing continued, iwaizumi frowned, furrowing his eyebrows and looking up from his notebook to stare at his computer.

"hey, shittykawa, are you okay?" iwaizumi's voice was laced with concern for his friend, as he closed his notebook and placed it on his study table.

there were a few more coughs, before oikawa weakly answered;

"i'll be alright iwa-chan, don't worry."

"are you sure? you're coughing pretty bad."

"yeah, i think i just caught a cold."

"well, alright then... if something happens to you tell me immediately, if you don't i'll beat you up."

oikawa let out a small chuckle.

"i'll make sure of that iwa-chan."

now, in any other situation, that would have made oikawa's heart flutter, and his stomach burst with butterflies, but in this situation, he didn't think he could feel that at the moment. his head was aching, not because of studying, hell, he hasn't even started studying yet, but because of coughing so much in a short amount of time.

his throat felt dry, sticky with blood and itchy from small thorns. his study desk was littered with small petals of hydrangea flowers, a few thorns sticking out. his eyes felt droopy and tired all of a sudden, as if he was ready to pass out.

he shook his head.

'i can study tomorrow early in the morning' he thought to himself as he grabbed a bottle of water from his study desk. he drank a few gulps, his face scrunching up in pain as he felt the thorns scratch at his throat.

"hey, iwa-chan, is it fine if we just study tomorrow early in the morning? i'm feeling kinda tired now"

"wha- i dont think you haven't even studie-"

"yes? okay, thank you iwa-chan. i'll see you tomorrow" oikawa hurriedly left the call, as to avoid any questions or remarks from iwaizumi.

a few seconds later, a faint, calm ding ringed through his room. he peeled his eyes open to look at his computer.

iwa-chan! ʕ￫ᴥ￩ʔ (sent at 12:52 AM, February 25th)

[oi, get some rest. you don't need to study early in the morning, just try to remember what you can and write it down. drink water before you go to bed lazykawa. goodnight.]

the message read. oikawa smiled faintly, glancing at his dirty study desk.

"i'll sleep in a bit. for now, i have to clean this mess.." oikawa muttered, standing up and scooping the petals in his arms. this is going to be a pain.

by the time the exam days have ended, oikawa was exhausted. there were bags under his eyes, and his coughing was getting worse. iwaizumi didn't show it, but he worried for his friend.

"oi, oikawa! have you eaten yet?" oikawa stopped in his tracks, his head slowly turning to iwaizumi.

"uhm, no? why? is it lunch yet?"

"dumbass, what do you mean 'is it lunch yet'?! didnt you hear the bell ring?" oikawa blinked. the bell rung?

oikawa squinted his eyes and slowly shook his head.

iwaizumi sighed. 'how much sleep has this dumbass been getting? 2 hours?' he thought, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"sorry iwaizumi. i just have not been feeling well these past few days." oikawa smiled up at him tiredly.

iwaizumi was stunned. 'iwaizumi?' he thought, surprised. the name almost felt foreign to hear, even though it was the name he was born with, the name that almost everyone has called him with.

it felt weird to hear, because oikawa had only called him that when they first met. iwaizumi furrowed his eyebrows.

"iwaizumi?" he parroted his thoughts, looking oikawa in the eyes as if he could see right through him.

"what, isn't that your name?"

"well, it is, but....you never call me iwaizumi. it's always iwa-chan or something" iwaizumi had muttered, tapping his knuckles on oikawa's shared table. oikawa smiled.

"aweeee, is iwa-chan sad that i don't call him iwa-chan anymore?" oikawa chuckled, lazily hooking his head on his hand to rest for as he gazed up at iwaizumi.

"wha- are you dumb?! i was just worried about you, you asshole!" iwaizumi raged, snapping at oikawa.

oikawa let out a weak, hearty laugh. 

“yeah, i know."

it had been 2 long weeks. the petals have grown to be half of the hydrangea, the thorns bigger than before, and there started to be much more blood then the first few times he'd cough up petals. iwaizumi had been checking on oikawa almost everyday, sending him messages, calls, and voice mails. all that iwaizumi knew of oikawa's situation was that oikawa was getting sicker as the days went.

he felt like his brain was rotting, slowly turning to nothing but dust.

oikawa had have this happen happen to him before, the feeling of waves of tiredness constantly crashing down his body, his brain felt like it was melting, his legs felt like jelly, his head spinning, making his head hurt like hell.

he scratched at his throat, and hissed when he itched it for a moment too long. his room was a mess. petals scattered around with the occasional blood, and a few thorns stuck to some of the petals.

oikawa sighed. he hasn't had the energy to clean his room for a couple weeks, always feeling so nauseous and heavy whenever he got home from school. oikawa groaned, moving to lay down on his side to try and get some sleep before he started coughing up again. maybe he could get some rest before he-

the doorbell rang.

oikawa froze.

and his blood ran cold.

fuck.

he slowly sat up, gripping the futon in between his hands until his knuckles turned white. he looked around his room, seeing the mess of everything.

he let out a small groan, praying, begging to whoever was up there that it was just a delivery guy that his mom had sent to give him food.

when he got up from his futon, muttering barely even a whisper; "coming" as the doorbell impatiently rang a second time, dragging his feet to his front door, and peeking through the peep hole.

he wanted the ground to swallow him up whole.

standing there, in all of his glory, outside in casual wear was iwaizumi, holding on to a steaming plastic bag of his favorite milk bread that was bought in the small corner store in the neighborhood oikawa lived in.

"ugh, what is taking that lazykawa so long to answer the door" he heard iwaizumi mutter, before he moved to ring the doorbell once more, the sound ringing throughout his house.

oikawa froze in his place, a small blush climbing to his cheeks. he shook off the feelings and lightly patted his cheeks, calming his racing heart down before he made a move to turn the knob of the door.

when the door opened, he peeked outside, looking up at iwaizumi, then down to what he was holding, then back up at iwaizumi. this continued on for a few seconds, iwaizumi slowly growing on an irk mark as it pressed on.

"oi! aren't you gonna let me inside?!" iwaizumi questioned, his patience growing thin. he noticed oikawa froze to stare up at him, then slowly look back at his house, then quickly looking back up at iwaizumi.

"what, you got a fuck buddy hiding in there? tell them that i don't care and that to leave, you're sick"

"pfft-" he heard oikawa chuckle, before he looked back up at iwaizumi with an amused glint in his eyes, his cheeks tinted a rosy pink from the joke that iwaizumi made.

they stared at each other for a few minutes, a small smile playing at their lips.

"so are they gone now? can i come in? come on i don't want my ass to freeze here"

"pfft, iwa-chan, come on, you of all people should know that i don't have a fuck buddy cause i'm not that type of person."

"yea, yea, i know, but what's taking you so long to let me in anyway? your food is getting cold." oikawa stared at the plastic bag in his friend's hands, the steam slowly clearing. oikawa frowned, then lead his eyes away from the bag to stare up back at his friends eyes.

"my house is a mess."

"and? so is mine. we've both seen each others house and we know it's similar to a pigsty." even when iwaizumi made a joke, oikawa didn't laugh, or even crack a smile. a frown still tugged on the setter's lips, which made iwaizumi sport on a frown too.

"it can't be that bad, i'm sure my place is dirtier than yours anyway. just let me in, i don't want your food to be cold when you eat it." with a hesitant glance to his house and back at iwaizumi, oikawa slowly opened the door, stepping aside to let his visitor in.

iwaizumi took off his shoes, placing them neatly to the side while he placed the plastic bag beside him on the floor so he could work on his shoes. once he stood up to his full height, he picked up the plastic bag and took a quick look around the house.

"it isn't that bad, what do you mean it's a mess?"

"i meant my room. i haven't cleaned it ever since i got sick" iwaizumi nodded, going to the kitchen to place the bag of food on the kitchen counter. oikawa happily hopped to the bag, muttering a small "thank you" and "itadakimasu" before biting into the bread. a satisfied hum left him buzzing, already grabbing a second one to munch on.

iwaizumi lingered his stare on oikawa for a second too long, a small smile gracing his lips before he turned away and gazed at the hallway leading to the bathroom and oikawa's room.

the door to oikawa's room was opened wide, and while oikawa was busy chomping down the food that iwaizumi had bought him, iwaizumi made his way to oikawa's room, intending to close the door, but when he got there, a small, pink, almost white petal greeted him just outside of oikawa's room, a few, maybe 6, was scattered outside of oikawa's room.

iwaizumi raised an eyebrow. flower petals? outside oikawa's room? he wondered. when he crouched to pick them up and throw them away, blood was next to the petals. iwaizumi's eyes widened.

blood? who's blood?

his eyes trailed, following the blood which lead straight to oikawa's room. the room was lit up, which made it easier to see. in oikawa's room, scattered petals, thick thorns, some dangerously thin you can barely see them, and blood. some blood on his sheets, on the floor, his study desk.

oikawa peeked a head out of the kitchen to check where iwaizumi had gone to, and when he saw him just outside his room, staring straight at him with wide eyes and a pale face, that he knew right then and there, that iwaizumi hajime had known. 

they sat in thick silence in oikawa's living room, sipping on the warm tea that iwaizumi had made for the both of them. oikawa wondered when was the last time he had drank tea. it soothed his throat, and calmed his nerves. but not calm enough.

he heaved a cough deep in his chest and covered his mouth with his hand, catching the petals, thorns, and blood on his hand.

oikawa winced as he opened his hand, staring down at his hand that was full of thorny, bloodied, petals.

iwaizumi watched his expression with a frown, and turned his gaze to look at his friend's hand. he furrowed his eyebrows. iwaizumi knew that oikawa was a total love sick person, dreaming about having a girlfriend, possibly a boyfriend before high school ended. he stood from his seat and went to the bathroom to throw away the petals and wash his hands. when he came back, they sat in silence once again.

oikawa traced the rim of the cup with his finger, staring into the contents of the cup with an emotion that iwaizumi could not pin down. iwaizumi stared into his own cup, looking at his reflection as he blinked back the tears that was daring him to spill.

iwaizumi sighed.

"so how long"

"....which one?"

"how long since you've known."

"maybe a month or two ago."

".....how long?"

"......2 weeks tops"

iwaizumi grimaced. thats so little time.

"get surgery"

"no"

"why?"

"i'd rather die loving the person i fell in love with rather than dying a pitiful, long, unlovable death, iwa-chan."

he was right there.

"who is it?"

"you'll get mad if i tell you who."

"i wont"

"next time"

iwaizumi grimaced once more. when is 'next time'? when he's 6 feet under?

iwaizumi gazed up at his friend with glassy eyes, while oikawa just stared bitterly at his cup. iwaizumi looked back down, clasping his hands together.

"alright. next time it is."

iwaizumi stared longingly at the smiling picture of oikawa atop his coffin, tears brimming his eyes as he stared longer.

he averted his gaze to the ground, tears rolling down his cheeks and dropping down to the floor.

he promised oikawa that he wouldn't cry in his funeral, and instead make embarrassing jokes about him, and when oikawa laughed, saying it would piss his family off, iwaizumi couldn't care less. he wanted to make oikawa's funeral light hearted, the way he wants it to be. but he himself can't even mutter up a single word, trying to choke up his sobs as he covered his mouth with his hand.

he could imagine oikawa laughing at him in wherever he ended up in, saying that he sounded so cocky and sure of himself when he uttered bullshit to his face about his funeral as they planned it in their heads, but now he's just a crying mess, the funeral that he and oikawa planned the night before he died long forgotten as his chest tightened up, and his eyes blurred the colors and details of the world.

iwaizumi was tapped on his shoulder by his team mate, catching his attention as he looked up with fat tears rolling down his cheeks like waterfalls.

"i-iwaizumi-san... it's your turn to speak." kindaichi mumbled, holding back tears of his own. iwaizumi let his eyes wander to the front as he nodded numbly to kindaichi's words. he didn't want to speak. his throat closed up, and his hands became clammy, his heart beating out of his chest, head spinning as a headache rolled in.

he looked back down to the ground, and clenched his fist. he made his way to the front, dragging his feet behind him as he tried to collect his thoughts and words to make a speech.

once he was there, he stared. with a troubled, and lost expression, iwaizumi started speaking.

"hey, iwa-chan?"

"hm?" iwaizumi hummed, playing with the strands of oikawa's hair.

"remember when you asked me who it was?"

"yeah. are you going to tell me now?" iwaizumi questioned, grabbing oikawa's hand and playing with his fingers.

"well, you might get mad."

"i get mad at everything you do, tooru."

"so you're going to get mad when i say that i got the hanahaki disease because of you?" oikawa questioned his friend, grasping at iwaizumi's hand and holding it in his.

iwaizumi froze.

he tightened his grip on oikawa's hand.

"well,"

iwaizumi started off, hesitant in picking his words

"i cant....get mad at you for having feelings." oikawa brought their interlocked hands to his lips. iwaizumi could feel oikawa smile against his hand as he placed a chaste kiss on the exposed skin.

"why not?"

iwaizumi stayed silent, carefully watching oikawa's movements.

when oikawa turned his head to look at iwaizumi, his cheeks flared pink.

"w-what the hell are you staring at, iwa-chan?" oikawa fumbled, squeezing iwaizumi's hand. iwaizumi squeezed back as a response.

"ugh, i hate you so much" iwaizumi grumbled, holding oikawa's head in place as he planted a barely there kiss on top of his forehead.

iwaizumi didn't know why, but a memory of him and oikawa laying down on the couch, limbs tangled together in a mess had played while he was speaking.

if oikawa was here to see iwaizumi's little speech he'd laugh his stupid laugh that iwaizumi had grown accustomed to, finding comfort in his little wheezes and squeaks whenever he laughed. he would laugh at iwaizumi's sappy speech, telling him to cheer up because they're going to get his favorite food later after this is finished.

iwaizumi just bitterly chuckled at that thought.

'if'

'if is such a dumb word.' iwaizumi thought, folding his hands in front of himself as he went back to his spot before.

he thought, he could feel oikawa's presence by his side. he thought he could see oikawa's smile as he side hugged iwaizumi. he thought he could hear his low chuckle as he made a small joke about how ugly iwaizumi looked while he was crying. he thought he got a glimpse of oikawa's dumb brown hair that always looked to be in great condition no matter what. he thought he could feel him.

he thought.

.....

iwaizumi hated it here. it felt suffocating. felt like everyone was hogging up all the oxygen and leaving none for him.

so he left early.

he walked down the street, lifelessness showing clearly in his eyes. the people walking around him bumped into him, some not bothering to say sorry, some even yelling at him but he could care less.

he pulled his scarf closer to his nose, burying his head deeper into the folds of the soft cotton. he weakly huffed, eyes searching the busy street of cars for something. was it oikawa he was searching? he didn't know either.

his eyes lingered on a street lamp before wandering again, slowly blinking. eyes stopping dead on a figure in the middle of the street.

"iwa-chan!" oikawa waved, smiling brightly at iwaizumi.

iwaizumi's eyes lit up, his feet moving on its own.

he choked down a sob as he walked towards oikawa.

walking turned to jogging.

and jogging turned to running.

"shittykawa, what are you doing there! you'll get hit!" iwaizumi let out a cracked chuckle, finally a few inches away from him. he reached out to him, but oikawa dodged, laughing as he ran away from iwaizumi.

"come catch me if you can, iwa-chan!" oikawa challenged, running towards the other end of the street.

iwaizumi's eyes dilated. no, he couldn't lose oikawa again.

"t-tooru wait, no, please, don't leave me again!" iwaizumi desperately called, running after oikawa. the said person laughed giddily, turning to iwaizumi and opening his arms.

"come home iwa-chan! i miss you" oikawa managed a smile, his eyes shining brightly as iwaizumi stared into them.

"home...haha...sure, tooru." iwaizumi panted, hanging his arms around oikawa's waist.

oikawa placed his chin atop iwaizumi's head and wrapped his arms around iwaizumi's shoulders, shielding his sight from the incoming truck.

"yeah. you're home now, hajime."

ah, how cruel life is.

Oikawa Tooru felt a bit dizzy behind his eyes. Maybe the gymnasium lights were too bright.

Or maybe it was her—standing there, just here for your brother Yahaba’s match—lingering by the bleachers after the game, fingers curled around his water bottle like you had every right to be there [you did], and no right to make his pulse stutter [you absolutely did].

Oikawa noticed the exact moment you walked in. Of course he did; he had a sixth sense for these things—he could read the shift in air pressure before a serve, the angle of Iwaizumi’s exasperated scowls, and especially, the gaze of a pretty spectator watching him with quiet intensity that made his skin prickle.

And now, despite his legendary focus, his brain short-circuited like bad Wi-Fi.

Badum.

His heartbeat was obnoxiously loud, the kind of dramatic thud that belonged in a shoujo manga, not in his stupid chest. He tightened his grip on the volleyball, knuckles whitening.

Focus. Serve. Ace. Repeat.

But then—then—you looked up. And smiled. At him? No. No, definitely at Iwaizumi, who was stretching behind him like some muscle-bound shoujo rival. Not that Oikawa noticed. Or cared. Obviously.

“Oikawa!” Coach barked. “You’re up.”

Right. Serve. He could do this. He’d done it a thousand times.

He tossed the ball, leapt—

—and his knee almost buckled when your voice cut clean through his focus.

“Nice form, Oikawa.”

The ball sailed straight into the net. thwap.

Silence.

“Wow,” Iwaizumi deadpanned. “That was embarrassing even for you.”

Oikawa’s cheeks burned. “A fluke!” he declared, flipping his hair. “The air was... wrong. And my shoelaces were—”

“You’re staring at [Name] again,” Hanamaki stage whispered.

“I’m not—!” But his traitorous pulse was already sprinting ahead without him. And it only took one sentence from you to prove him wrong.

“Oikawa.” Your voice, closer now. Too close. He turned—and there you were, tilting your head, a little frown on your face that flipped his stomach inside out.

He couldn’t say when you started affecting him. You were just supposed to help him with notes, as class president, catching him up after missed lectures. So why did your voice shake him more than a punch from Iwaizumi?

maybe it was because he was a keen observer..? He noticed how your pen would hover over the edge of his messy notes, then burst into doodles—bunnies in jerseys, a stick-figure Yahaba mid-sneeze—but you’d freeze when given a blank page.

How you empathized with everyone—the teacher, rivals, even the cranky lunch lady—but turned into a flustered mess when he thanked you. Left ink-smudges on your cheek he ached to wipe away.

And the way you bit your lip trying not to laugh at his dumb jokes, turning your lower lip a soft, tempting pink.

Oikawa Tooru knew exactly why he liked you. He was doomed.

“Are you okay? You look tiptop—just like you do on TV.”

The gym air turned to concrete in his lungs. His brain screeched to a halt like a buffering video.

TV.

TV.

TV.

“…TV?” he croaked, voice cracking like an old vinyl record.

You spun Yahaba’s water bottle cap between your fingers. “Yeah, I caught your match while flipping channels.” A pause. “Right when you said that thing about—”

Oikawa’s entire life flashed before his eyes.

Please no.

“‘If you’re gonna hit it,’” you quoted, eyes crinkling, “‘hit it until it breaks.’”

Nuclear silence. Iwaizumi looked like chrismtmas came early“She knows your catchphrase,” he grinned.

“IT’S NOT A—” Oikawa clutched his hair, executing The Exact Flip mid-panic. “I WAS FIFTEEN! IT WAS METAPHORICAL!”

“Sounded pretty literal before the Shiratorizawa match,” Matsukawa said casually.

“With tears in your eyes,” Hanamaki added.

You blinked. “Wait, really?”

“NO!” Oikawa shrieked, voice hitting frequencies only dogs could hear. “THEY’RE LYING—YOU GUYS I SWEAR TO—”

Through the chaos, you smiled. Soft. Infuriating. “I thought it was cute. Kinda cool, too.”

Oikawa’s brain blue-screened.

Because that was the worst part. You liked it. You remembered him. And now his heart was pounding loud enough to echo across the entire prefecture. He likes you. Oikawa tooru likes you.

“Aw,” Hanamaki cooed. “Captain’s blushing.”

“I’M NOT—!”

“Wait, wait,” Matsukawa cut in, eyes gleaming.

“[Name], you do know our captain has this weird habit of staring at the bleachers during timeouts, right?”

You blinked. “Huh?”

"Like he's looking for someone" Hanamaki singsonged.

Oikawa made a sound like a deflating balloon. “You all just lost your bestfriend priveledges.”

“Oikawa,” Iwaizumi said solemnly, “just admit you like that she watched—”

“NO!” Oikawa lunged, spectacularly missing as Iwaizumi dodged.

“HE DOES THAT,” Hanamaki told you brightly, “when he’s—”

Oikawa’s shoe connected with his shin.

LOSER MEN ON TOP UGHHHHH.

Random Haikyuu Headcanons

CW: Swearing, mentions of private parts/genitalia

A/N: I genuinely had so much fun writing this. I love writing crack. This is one of my favorite things ever.

Atsumu sends inspirational quotes to Osamu when Osamu is having a bad day in order to piss him off more. Like the ones you see in TJ Maxx or in a white mother’s beach house. (Also he’s definitely gotten a virus on his phone/computer from downloading sketchy apps for fonts in order to enhance the experience)

Lev has gotten stuck in the net 

Hinata and Yachi read warrior cats as a kid

Noya, Tanaka and Yamamoto bark

Yamamoto’s Little Sister Akane hisses at people

Sugawara and Yamaguchi are constantly trying to set everybody up

Oikawa was a drama kid and has always wanted to be in a hallmark movie

Iwaizumi knows how to tap dance

Asahi firmly supports #freebritney 

Kenma sells random peoples feet pics online for money for games. Like he goes on google steals ppls feet pics, then goes to insta, looks at the people who like feet pics and DMs them asking if they wanna buy.

Aone doesn’t have any eyebrows because they got burned off

Shirabu has a gap in his bangs in order to not block out his third eye. Semi told him it was on the side of his head

Kageyama buys unpasteurized milk 

Sakusa has sprayed Komori with raid

Komori will poke holes is Sakusa’s masks when he pisses him off. Or will hide  all of Sakusa’s masks and only leave out ones with days of the week labeled on them.

Semi and Tendou have both been arrested for arson

Goshiki, Shirabu, Kyotani, Makki, and Kinoshita unironically refer to women as “females”

So does Ushijima but he also refers to men as “males” and I don’t want to fight him so it’s alright

Hinata doesn’t know what a prostate is

Osamu spits in Atsumu’s food when he’s mad at him. Better yet, if Atsumu has a slight allergy to something, like something that will only give him a small rash or hives, Osamu will put a little bit of that ingredient in his food so that he can’t taste it, but he still gets an allergic reaction.

Akaashi collects coupons

Bokuto wants an ass tattoo

Oikawa has his asshole bleached