Fairy Tales - Blog Posts

Oh yeah, remember that?

Folktales you can read as queer without squinting

Happy Pride everyone! Here is a selection of folk and fairy tales that I enjoy for both their plots and their queer vibes. I speak of vibes only, because I cannot say I have insight in the historical intention of these tales, but I do vouch for me presenting them to you unaltered, as I found them.

I will give the titles with links to the full texts here and summaries under the read more:

Gold-tree and Silver-tree Scottish fairy tale, collected by Joseph Jacobs, published in 1892. [Cw: abusive parent, murder.]

The Shoes That Were Danced to Pieces Cape Verdian folktale, collected by Elsie Clews Parsons in 1916-1917. [Cw: attempted poisoning]

The Unicorn Spanish fairy tale, collected by Aurelio Espinosa in 1947. [Cw: murder, attempt at being outed, awkward use of pronouns.]

The Tale of Tamamizu Japanese literary folktale, written by an unknown author between the Muromachi period (1336–1573) and the beginning of the Edo period (1603–1867). [Cw: tragic ending.]

The Tale of the Marquise-Marquis of Banneville French literary fairy tale, published in 1697, authorship contested (suggested: François-Timoléon de Choisy, Marie-Jeanne L'Héritier, Charles Perrault). [Cw: gender dysphoria, age difference.]

Bisclavret French literary legend, written by Marie de France in the 12th century. [Cw: wolf-violence]

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Fairy Tales by Nayoung Wooh

Yes

What we really need is an adaptation of the original 1740 The Beauty and the Beast

So were you aware that the The Beauty and the Beast story we all know is a heavily abridged and rewritten version of a much longer novella by Gabrielle-Suzanne Barbot de Villeneuve?  And that a lot of the plot holes existing in the current versions exist because the 1756 rewrite cut out the second half of the novella, which consisted entirely of the elaborate backstory that explains all the weird shit that happened before?  And that the elaborate backstory is presented in a way that’s kind of boring because the novel had only just been invented in 1740 and no one knew how they worked yet, but contains a bazillion awesome ideas that beg for a modern retelling?  And that you are probably not aware that the modern world needs this story like air but the modern world absolutely needs this story like air?  Allow me to explain:

The totally awesome elaborate backstory that explains Beauty and the Beast

Once upon a time there was a king, a queen, and their only son

But while the prince was still in his infancy, in a neat reversal of how these fairy tales usually go, the king tragically died, leaving his wife to act as Regent until their son reaches maturity

Unfortunately, the rulers of all the lands surrounding them go, “Hmm, the kingdom is ruled by a woman now, it must be weak, time for an invasion!”

And the Queen goes, “Well, if I let some general fight all these battles for me, he’ll totally amass enough fame and power to make a bid for the throne; if I want to protect my son’s crown, I have no choice but to take up arms and lead the troops myself!”

(Btw, I want to stress that this woman is not Eowyn or Boudica and nothing in the way her story is presented suggests that she had any interest martial exploits before or in any way came to enjoy them during these battles.  This is a perfectly ordinary court lady who would much rather be embroidering altar covers for the royal chapel and playing with her child until necessity made her go, “Oh no, this sucks, I guess I have to become a Warrior Queen now” and she just happened to kick ass at it anyway.)

And the Queen totally kicked ass, but the whole “twice as good for half the credit” thing meant that no matter how many battles she won, potential enemies refused to take her and her army seriously until she had defeated them so no sooner would she fend off one invasion than another one would pop up on a different border.

So she spent the majority of her young son’s life away from the castle leading armies, but it was OK because she left him in the care of her two best friends, who just happen to be fairies!  This was an awesome idea because a) fairies have magic, and therefore are like the best people to protect the prince from any threats and b) fairies consider themselves to be so above humanity that the lowest fairy outranks the highest mortal, so they’d have no interest in taking a human throne.  Good thing they were both good fairies instead of one good and one evil one!

(Spoiler:  they were not both good fairies.)

So the two fairies basically take turns raising the prince until he’s old enough to rule.  And on the eve of his twenty-first birthday, the evil older one comes into the prince’s bedroom.

“So listen, kid.  You’re about to become king, your mother’s on her way home from the war to see you crowned, and I have a third piece of good news for you!  You see, I’ve actually been spending so much time here lately because Fairyland’s become a bit too hot to hold me for reasons totally not related to me being secretly evil.  And if I have to hang in the human world, I might as well reside in the upper echelons of it, so even though as a powerful fairy I completely eclipse your puny human status in a staggeringly unimaginable way, since you’re about to be king and since my premonition that I should stick this whole guardianship thing out because you would be hot one day has totally proved accurate (go me), I will graciously lower myself to allowing you to marry me.  Please feel free to grovel at my feet in gratitude.  (Btw, we can totally start the wedding night now, we’ll tell your mother about it when she arrives tomorrow.)”

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Frankly, if you like classic literature and/or fairy tales (and speak well enough French), then this book is a Must. It collects four stories written by Henriette-Julie de Castelnau de Murat, one of the 17th century noble ladies who were writing fairy tales in France. They used those stories to engage with their lived realities, for example, speaking up against arrange marriages was a recurring theme.

Anyway, one of them was a lesbian. That is Madame de Murat. The stories in this book are not explicitly queer, for the obvious reason of being written in the 17TH CENTURY, but the subtext is definitely there, plus you get a biography of the author.

It is a short book, interesting read, and I love it SO MUCH to see one of the conteuses get some recognition. It is beyond time that we start reprinting the stories of these women.

Story Time (Ushijima x Reader)

*GIF not mine*

Summary: When you are assigned a partner project with the intimidating Ushiwaka, you start to realize he’s not all that scary, and maybe, just maybe you could teach him a thing or two about Happily Ever Afters.

Author’s Note: I’m just gonna say it now: Ushiwaka would be a big softie for his s/o. There, I said it. Anyways, he’s a lil OOC in this fic, but suck it up bc he’s adorable… well, at least to me, he is. Enjoy! 

Word count: 3344

        The rain drops on the window were having a race, and droplet number three was winning. You, the referee of this epic face off, sat in class quite boredly, barely comprehending the teacher’s droning on about a new project. You were going to have a partner and a syllabus, so there was no reason for you to listen that intensely. Your neck was sore from being held in it’s turned position for such a stretch of time, and so was the hand that held your chin, but you couldn’t care less. A tune popped into your head, and while humming slightly you began to bounce your knee to the beat as well. 

        “That song is super old, you know,” the redhead who sat beside you piped up, “try singing a newer one, like ‘Filter.’” 

        “Tendou, is there something you and YN would like to share with the class?” the teacher announced, giving your desk mate a pointed look. 

        “Sorry, miss, I was just suggesting YN change her radio station. The song she was on wasn’t really my style,” he teasingly remarked. A couple of students chuckled at the facial expressions the class clown and the teacher exchanged, but you were just glad the attention was once more off you. Finally, the teacher backed down and returned to the list she was reading aloud, and Tendou gave you a victorious smirk. 

        “’Serendipity’ is not that old,” you whispered to him while keeping your eyes on the front of the class. 

        The redhead raised his brow in return, opening his mouth to counter, “You know it's from three years ago, right. They’ve made plenty of new-”

        “YN.” The teacher’s call instantly grabbed your attention, and you looked up at her in fear of a scolding. “You’ll be partners with Ushijima.” The statement startled you, until you remembered oh crap, there’s a new project. Dark green eyes found yours from across the room, and you blushed before glancing away. Your desk mate beside you had noticed, however, and let out a small hum with a devious smirk before moving to join his own partner. 

        Tendou’s intimidating teammate sauntered over to your desk, completely dismissing the lack of personal space and invading your precious bubble. He didn’t smile at you, but he never smiled, so that was to be expected. Ushijima was known as a terrifyingly strong, but equally handsome, man, and with that information, you received the same amount of pitying looks as you did jealous. 

        Ignoring the eyes on you, you watched in your peripheral vision as Ushijima pulled up a chair right next to your desk and crashed down into it. His lumbering body wasn’t as graceful as it seemed on television, and you couldn’t help but spiral into a mental rabbit hole at the thought of him, or more specifically, his volleyball team, and the games you had seen them play on local sports stations. There was always one player your eyes never strayed from, but to be fair, the platinum blond setter was highly attractive. 

        You were drawn from your thoughts by a throat clearing at your side. This time, the man’s spine-chilling presence was too close to bear, so you scooched your own seat away slightly, only to cringe at the loud screech it made against the floor. A look flashed in Ushijima’s eyes, but it was gone too quickly for you to identify, especially as you chuckled nervously at your own blunder. Finally, he gruffly spoke up. “I think we should read books to the local elementary school.”

        Silence fell over you. Yep, that was definitely the last thing you expected to hear from the stone-faced ace. “W-we should what?” you asked incredulously.

        “For our ‘Give Back to the Community’ project. I think we should read to elementary schoolers.” Oh, so that’s what the assignment was about. However, your fellow third year’s suggestion was just as jaw-dropping as when you first heard it. To make sure he was serious, you inspected his dark orbs, only to find they were just as indifferent as when he first approached you. Well, no point in arguing with him now, you thought, instantly adhering to his admittedly good plan. In any case, you already had a younger cousin who attended that school, and would love to see her again. 

         “I think that’s a great idea,” you declared while flashing him a small smile. “What kind of books were you thinking?”

                                ~~~

        Walking through the halls, you glanced back down at the note you had for Ushijima. It was a reminder he had wanted you to make for both of you, along with a time and place of when you would read at the elementary school. Last night you had contacted its principal and had gotten the go ahead for your project. Now where is that brute, you thought as you searched for his olive-brown hair. At first, you thought it would have been easy given his hulking form. But now, after trying to hunt him down for at least twenty minutes, you were starting to grow agitated. 

        “Hey YN, looking for someone?” A voice sounded behind you. Turning around at its familiarity, you expected to also see your partner, only to flush at the sight of your crush. Tendou smirked at your red face, but he also appeared disappointed. You didn’t notice a thing, though, as your eyes hadn’t strayed once from Semi. The blond looked at you almost unimpressed, and you subconsciously wondered if there was something on your face, or if your hair had been mussed up. 

        “Y-yeah, umm,” you cleared your throat at the stutter. “Have you seen Ushiwaka anywhere? I have our project time for him.” 

        Tendou smiled at something, or someone behind you, and kept his mouth shut when a deep, stiff voice spoke, “Hello YN.” Whipping around, you beamed victoriously at the sight. The action must have blinded the ace player, because he looked away directly after. 

        Shoving the note into Ushijima’s hands, you informed him, “We got the appointment on Friday at the elementary school closest to here. I already spoke with our teacher, and she gave us permission to miss school for it, thank God. It’s around lunch, so we’ll have to leave a little before that time.” Your eyes shined with pride at what you had already done for the project, and you talked almost excitedly. You had always wanted to work with children, so you adored Ushijima’s idea. 

        “Sounds great, I’ll see you then.” 

        “Okay, see you guys around.” Waving as you walked away, you turned back and held your cold hands to your cheeks. While you had only ever truly spoken to Semi once, it was still just as nerve-wracking to speak with him directly behind you. 

        As you left down the hall, you failed to notice the three pairs of eyes on you: one indifferent, one cocky, and one… abnormally bright.

                                ~~~

        Sitting in one of two main rocking chairs of the school’s library, you were even more nervous than usual when Ushijima approached you, arriving right on time while you had chosen to roll in twenty minutes ahead of schedule. The teachers you had talked to said they would release their students at 12:30 to the library, giving the pair of you thirty minutes to choose a story and hope it would keep their attention. 

        “Hey,” you greeted your project partner, observing as he took the seat next to you. 

        “Hello,” he responded bluntly, sitting uncomfortably stiff in his chair as it began to rock on its own. The conversation seemed to have hit a dead end; that is, until you remembered something. 

        “Oh, what fairy tale did you want to read to the kids?” you asked him, standing up and approaching the section of the library evidently labeled “Fables.” While waiting for his response, you chose to busy yourself by checking out the many options available on the shelves. 

        “Preferably a calm one. Maybe… without princesses?” For the first time in your whole life, Ushijima sounded unsure of himself, almost as if fairy tales were unknown territory to him.

        You grew confused. “Well then, what’s your favorite one from when you were a kid?”

        “I never really read fairy tales as a child. Though I do remember hearing about one that does pique my interest.” You stopped and stared at your partner in bewilderment at the first half of his statement, and a frown stole the place of your smile at the confession. Who’s never read fairy tales as a kid? What a sad childhood that must have been, you thought to yourself, shaking your head in disbelief. 

        “I’m so sorry, but fairy tales are great, you should read some when you have the chance! Some are a little more sinister than others if you read from certain authors, l-like Cinderella! In the original, the stepsisters like cut off parts of their own feet, but-,” you cut yourself off, surprised at your own word vomit. “I’m sorry, I’m rambling.” Your jaw almost dropped when Ushijima, the Ushijima, brandished you a small hint of a smile, the corners of his lips slightly upturned. 

        “It’s okay, I like hearing about them. Maybe not those kinds of scenes but…” his deep voice trailed off and he gestured for you to continue. Quickly, you changed the subject and looked away to avoid making contact with his sharp, olive-colored orbs. You knew that if you had kept staring, a blush would’ve been inevitable. 

        “Umm, okay, that’s cool,” you mumbled out. “Anyways, you were saying one piqued your interest. Which one?”

        His eyes seemed to glimmer at the mention of his evidently beguiling fable, and he announced, “‘Little Red Riding Hood.’ That’s the one that has always interested me. Although I hear there are many different versions of this one, so I fear I might not be thinking of the right story for the kids. What do you think?”

        You shake your head and say, “No, no, no. That is a good one, but what happened in the version your thinking of that's got you so interested in it?”

        “Well, in the one I’ve heard about, the wolf and Little Red Riding Hood-” Ushijima is cut off by the sudden chatter of young children entering the room. Eyes widening in surprise, you check the time, only to be confused when you realize that they are a few minutes early. A teacher stumbles over to Ushijima and hurriedly explains that the kids had finished their music class ahead of schedule, so the reading would need to start prematurely.

        Hastily, you wrack your mind for the author’s name of the age-appropriate Little Red Riding Hood story and “Aha” victoriously as your eyes spot the book you were looking for. Retrieving it from the shelf, you strut over to your project partner with the slim picture book in hand, motioning for him to join you in front of the twenty-something group of elementary schoolers in your two given rocking chairs. 

        You give him a small, reassuring smile before you announce, “Hey kids, my name is YN YLN and this is Wakatoshi Ushijima and today we will be reading ‘Little Red Riding Hood’ to you guys!” Attempting to keep your voice cheerful, you are relieved when the children respond positively instead of groaning like you had expected. Spotting your little cousin in the front row of the class, you return her excited wave softly and accompany it with a large grin. Winking at Ushijima, you don’t have time to question your cheeky action before you hand him the book, allowing him to start reading his coveted fairy tale. 

                                ~~~

        As more time passes, you start to realize Ushijima is growing more and more confused with his fable. After you close the book with the classic “Happy Ever After,” you throw him a confused smile as the class of children shout a loud, rambunctious “Thank you!” Before you can question him, however, your younger cousin approaches and gives you a large hug.

        “N/N, that was so fun! I wish you would read to our class more! Can you please read to our class more?” Her voice began to transition from begging to whining, and you started to panic internally while wondering how to handle the situation. After all, you had only babysat her once before, and that night, you had done just about anything to get her to stop crying. 

        You were fearing the same result when, thankfully, her teacher came to the rescue, telling her that she needed to rejoin the class. Grumbling under her breath, your cousin gave you one last hug while glancing at Ushijima, who had been awkwardly watching the encounter from his chair. Looking away with fear, your cousin hesitantly whispered, “N/N, your boyfriend is scary.” Your cousin’s teacher was quick to usher her out of the library before you could explain that, no, the scary man was not your boyfriend, and please don’t tell the rest of the family as they will flip.

        Sighing in exasperation, you whip around and give Ushijima a shy smile and laugh before saying, “Sorry about her, she just assumed, I’ll tell her later. If she doesn’t forget by then.”

        Ushijima ignores your lame joke while responding, “That’s okay, I didn’t mind.” Hearing those words, you flush slightly and wonder if he meant it how it sounded. 

        Rapidly changing the subject, you asked him why he seemed so confused while reading the ‘Red Riding Hood’ fairy tale.

        “Well,” he admitted, “In the one I’ve always heard about, the wolf and Little Red Riding Hood fall in love, and the wolf is actually just a kind werewolf who looks scary most of the time. And Little Red Riding Hood isn’t a little girl, but an adult just like him, who ignores his flaws….” Ushijima trails off and he looks away as he begins to blush as well. Your eyebrows raise softly at his unexpectedly sheepish admission, and you smile widely. 

        “You know, if you wanted a story like that, we could always read ‘Beauty and the Beast.’ That one’s pretty much on the track you’re looking for,” You tell him, grin not stopping for an instant. 

        “We?” he asks gently and you almost choke on the oxygen in your lungs. 

        “You! You! I meant you. You could always… read it on your own, not we.” You fail to miss the way the smug glimmer in his eyes falls, and you smirk while lightly suggesting, “Unless you do want us to read it?” 

        With that, Ushijima seems to gain his confidence back, only for it to drop once more when he mutters, “I couldn’t do that. We shouldn’t do that.”

        Bewildered by his sudden change in attitude towards you, you quickly question, “Why?”

        “Because.”

        “Because?”

        “Because I’ve seen you around Semi, and I… I don’t want to ruin whatever you guys may have,” Ushijima admits, his hands subconsciously curling into fists. While watching this, your eyes widen in realization and you wonder to yourself, Am I really that obvious? Shaking away the thought, you quickly grab the man’s hand and unfurl it, holding it in both of yours while looking him in the eyes.

        “I’ll admit, before today, I did like Semi, but for appearances only! I’ve never even talked to him. Well, only once, but that was because he helped me pick up my books when I dropped them, tripping over God knows what-,” you cut off your own rambling once again, and wonder to yourself why you do that so often, especially in his presence. “Either way, my crush on him is purely visual, if that’s what you want to call it. Now... well, I’m really hoping we get a chance to read ‘Beauty and the Beast’ together. Or at least watch the movie…?” you trail off suggestively, timidly awaiting his response. 

        Ushijima is silent for a moment, and you begin to lose your confidence, loosening your grip on his hand, but he quickly grasps both of yours once more in an instant. 

        “I’d like that. A lot.”

                                ~~~

        Glancing at the clock on the gym wall, you groan and look back to the court while whining, “Wakatoshi, come on. We’re gonna miss the movie.” You bounce up and down on your toes impatiently, watching your boyfriend once again spike the ball so hard into the floor on the other side of the court that it bounces up and lands in the stands. At least I don’t flinch at the sound anymore, you thought, watching Goshiki grumble under his breath before racing up the stairs to retrieve yet another volleyball. 

        “Sorry, babe, just one more I promise,” the ace replies distractedly.  

        “Babe, huh?” Tendou asks, wiggling his eyebrows. “You guys must be getting serious. Who’d have thought Mr. Scary, Blank-Face Man would get a girlfriend, and call her ‘babe’ nonetheless!” The redhead laughs to himself loudly and cheekily elbows Shirabu in the side, who responds by shooing his hands away in irritation.

        Ignoring his teammate’s taunts, Ushijima tosses up the ball again to Semi, who sets it perfectly in place for his favorite spike. The ball hits the other half of the court so harshly you’re surprised it doesn’t pop from the pressure. Following as it travels once more into the public seating on the second level of the gym, your amazed expression drops in exchange for amusement. Everyone witnesses as it rebounds back down onto the court as a result of the ball hitting a chair. 

        “Thank God,” Goshiki mutters, dropping the first ball he got into the basket and picking up the second one just as it rolled over to him. “I am so tired of this job,” he tells you, and you giggle at his worn out expression. 

        Noticing this, Ushijima jogs over to you and swiftly kisses your cheek, giving a pointed look to the first year before packing up his gear. You roll your eyes at his possessive action and decide to help the boys clean up while waiting for your boyfriend. Just as you reach for a stray volleyball, another hand plucks it away. You glance up and smile politely at Semi while jokingly claiming, “That one was mine, you know.” 

        The blonde third year blushes at your quip, chuckling slightly before replying, “Sorry, I didn’t know you claimed it. You still want it?” He teasingly holds it out to you, but the ball is stolen out of his grip by one stronger, larger hand. 

        Looking up slowly, Semi shivers at the glare he receives from Ushijima who smoothly throws the ball into the basket behind his teammate. “Actually, it was mine.” 

        Scoffing and smirking at your boyfriend’s jealous tone, you grab his now empty hand and say, “Don’t get all pissy, let’s just go before we miss the whole movie.” As the two of you walk through the gym doors, you look over to see Ushijima glaring back at his poor teammate, who keeps his wide, brown orbs locked on the ground to avoid the ace’s wrathful gaze. You roll your eyes once more before pulling his face toward yours. The intimate act successfully captures his attention, and you playfully whisper, “You’re really hot when you’re mad. I like it.”

        Raising his brows, Ushijima’s deep voice teased, “Oh really? Well then maybe we should skip the movie altogether.” 

        You smile flirtatiously at him while biting your lip. “I like that idea. Maybe we could just talk all night long.” 

        “Sounds good, because I’m still confused as to why the little girl didn’t notice her grandmother was actually a wolf. Was she nearsighted?” You groan at his innocent change of the subject.

        “Are you serious? I’ve told you a thousand times, she was just a little girl who didn’t notice for the sake of the story!” 

        “I would’ve noticed if my grandmother was a wolf.”

        “I know, I know, ‘cause nothing flies past you, except for every single joke ever.”

        “Impossible… jokes do not fly.” 

        Your whine of exasperation fades into the night as the two of you walk home to discuss fairy tales. 

Fairy Godmother's an op for that curfew fr you know how little shit you can get done before midnight.

Long ass carriage ride too I know Cinderella was STRESSED for all those two hours.

Maar

Ze zei nee.

Ze geloofde niet in magie

Zei ze

Dat zo'n dingen enkel in

Sprookjes

Gebeuren.

We maakten

Zonder haar

Geen schijn van kans

Ten ondergaan

Klinkt zo heroïsch

Dit was inderdaad geen

Sprookje

In sprookjes

Wordt er niet

Verloren.

pronouns are fee/fo/fi/fum and boy do i smell an englishman

After watching Cinderella (the original animated movie, which was my favorite as a child), it strikes me how it solves many common problems people have with this fairy tale. Like:

Why did they try to identify the mystery girl using her shoe size? Because the bullheaded king's only clue to her identity was the shoe the Grand Duke picked up off the steps.

Why didn't the prince recognize her by her face? Because his father wouldn't involve him in the process at all, and wasn't the one going around trying to find her.

Why did the prince want to marry a lady he only met that night? Because his father was going to force him to marry someone, and he genuinely liked this woman.

Why did Cinderella want to marry a man she only met that night? Because marriage was her best and most secure way to freedom. Fucked up, but you can't say it's unrealistic for the setting of a fairy tale. She also genuinely liked him.

If they're using the slipper to find her, wouldn't it be more sensible to search for the person with the other slipper? Yes. The King is purposefully nonsensical and the Duke is purposefully terrified enough of him to carry out his orders to the letter. Furthermore, they end up doing that in the end anyway, because the Duke's glass slipper is shattered, and Cinderella brings out the one she has to prove her identity.

Why didn't the stepmother and stepsisters recognize Cinderella at the ball? Because they were dancing too far away, and then left the party to dance in private, which was possible because the King wanted very badly for his son to hit it off with someone and tried to arrange the best conditions for that to happen.

Why didn't Cinderella save herself? Because in real life, abuse victims should not have to shoulder that responsibility, and usually can't. In real life, you need and deserve an external support system. Asking for help, in this kind of situation, is very important. She is saved by others because she is loved. Because she is not alone. Because she has friends who love her, and want her to be happy and safe and free. Because in real life, people who want to help someone who is suffering are like the mice. We can't pull out miracle solutions, but we can provide companionship and if we're in the right place at the right time, we can help the person find a better life.

Why didn't the fairy godmother save Cinderella from her abusive household, or try to help her sooner? Because she's magic, and magic can't solve your problems. Quote: "Like all dreams, well, I'm afraid it can't last forever." This (and Cinderella's dream of going to the ball) is a metaphor for pleasurable things in bad circumstances. An ice cream won't get rid of your depression, but it will provide you with momentary happiness to bolster you, as well as the reminder that happiness in general is still possible for you. Cinderella doesn't want to go to the ball so she can get away from her stepmother and stepsisters, or so she can meet someone to marry and leave with. She wants to go to the ball to remind herself that she can still have things she wants. That her desires matter. This is important because the movie does a very good job of illustrating Lady Tremaine's subtle abuse tactics, all of which invisibly press the message that Cinderella doesn't matter. While going to the ball and fulfilling her dreams may not be a victory in the material sense, it is still a victory against Lady Tremaine's efforts.

Why is Cinderella's choice to be kind and obedient framed as a good thing, when you are not obligated to be kind to your abuser? This one walks a very fine line, but I think the movie still makes it make sense. Lady Tremaine never acknowledges her cruelty. She always frames her punishments of Cinderella as Cinderella's fault. Cinderella is interrupting, Cinderella is shirking her duties, Cinderella is playing vicious practical jokes. Cinderella is still a member of the family, of course she can go to the ball, provided she meet these impossible conditions. Lady Tremaine's tactics are designed to make Cinderella feel like she must always be in the wrong and her stepmother must always be in the right. If Cinderella calls her stepmother out on her cruelty, or attempts to fight back, Lady Tremaine can frame that as Cinderella being ungrateful, cruel, broken, evil, etc. If Cinderella responds to her stepmother's cruelty defiantly (in the way she's justified to), she's not taking control out of Lady Tremaine's hands. Disobedience can be spun back into her stepmother's control. She wants Cinderella to be angry and sad and show how much she's hurting. So since Cinderella is adapting to her situation, she chooses to be kind. Not only because she naturally wants to be and it's part of her personality, but because it is a form of defiance in its own way, and it allows her to keep a reminder of her agency and value. Her choice to be kind is her chance to keep her own narrative alive: she is not obeying because her stepmother wants her to and she has to do what her stepmother does, but because she wants to. It's a small distinction, but one that makes all the difference in terms of keeping her hope and identity. (Fuck, I wrote a whole paragraph about how this doesn't mean you can't be angry at people who hurt you or that you need to be kind to deserve help, and then deleted it by accident. Uh. Try again.) Expressing anger and pain is an important part of regaining autonomy and healing. Although it is commendable to be kind while you are suffering, it is NOT required for you to get help or be worthy of help. If Cinderella's recovery was explored beyond "happily ever after" she would need to let herself be angry and sad to heal. Cinderella is not only kind because it comes naturally to her, but because it's her defense against the abuse she's suffering. Everyone's story and experiences are different, and one does not invalidate the other.

Bonus round for answers that aren't part of the movie:

Why didn't Cinderella run away? Where would she go? Genuinely, in hundreds-of-years-ago France, where would she go if she snuck out of the window with a change of clothes? With her step-family, she's miserable and abused, but she's fed, clothed, and in no danger of dying or being taken advantage of by anyone other than her stepmother and stepsisters. Even if she escapes and manages to find financial security, her stepmother might be able to find her and get her back.

Why didn't Cinderella burn the house down with them inside it/slit their throats in the night/poison their food/etc.? Because that's a revenge fantasy, and this story is a fantasy about being saved. There's nothing wrong with making Cinderella into a revenge fantasy. That's perfectly fine, as long as you acknowledge that the other type of fantasy is also a valid interpretation. (I mean, the original fairy tale features the stepsisters getting their feet mutilated and all three of them getting their eyes pecked out, so go for it.)

Why isn't Cinderella more proactive in general? Because she's a child who has been abused for the back half of her life, who has had to be focused on survival because. you know. she's an abused kid.

How did she dance in glass slippers? Gotta agree with you there man, that's weird.

And the same will happen to you! -  He’s a Dragon (2015)

When you love someone you become the happiest you’ve ever been.

On Drakón [Он – дракон] (2015) dir. Indar Dzhendubaev

The day we get an adaptation of Beauty and the Beast with Belle kissing the Beast when she's in Beast form instead of prince form ?! The 2014 version almost gave it to us !!!

WE GOTTA CANCEL FAIRYTALES THEY'RE USING THE F SLUR AND THEY AREN'T GAY

My friend and I were talking about "What if we got sucked into a story?" and we decided she would end up in a fairy tale. Now is she the innocent girl with onimous friends or the pixie herself...hmm...

Let's allow you all to decide.

Fairy Tale Girl ? OR...

Link to friend's tumblr in the above section.

MAD TEA PARTY EXCERPT FROM “Alice’s Salacious Adventures in Wonderland”

After a few minutes of walking through a quiet forest, Alice arrived at an enormous house that must have belonged to the Hare for the path ended there. In front of the house was a long table decorated with china teacups, teapots, teakettles, and teaspoons. Two men sat with a sleeping woman between them. One of the men had a Roman nose and big jaw, wore an orange shirt and green vest, and an enormous top hat. Clearly, the Hatter. His orange shirt sported a picture of a teapot on it. Ridiculous. Shirts with tea illustrations on them. Such tea-shirts would never stay in fashion long.

The other man was, well, yum. The signs must have made a spelling error. The sign should have read “Bare,” not “Hare.” This other man was naked, muscle-clad, and covered with hair. The woman had a beautiful flow of blonde hair draped over her shoulders. She, too, was naked. She slept leaning back in her chair.

As Alice approached, their discussion became more distinct.

“Some more tea?” the Hatter asked the Hare.

“Yes, please.”

The Hatter poured, but as far as she could tell, nothing came out of the spout.

“Milk?” the Hatter asked.

“Yes, please,” the Hare replied.

The Hatter placed the empty teacup directly under the woman’s breast and tweaked her nipple. The woman giggled in her sleep and her nipple hardened, but no milk had come from it.

She did a quick check and squeezed her own nipple. No milk.

She walked to the table as the Hatter handed the teacup past the woman to the Hare.

It wasn’t until Alice took a seat across from the three that the Hatter noticed her.

“You can’t sit there,” the Hatter said. “There isn’t enough room.”

“There’s plenty of room,” Alice protested.

“Alright then,” the Hatter said. “If you want to join us, you must figure out the one thing that is wrong with this poem. ‘Twinkle twinkle goes your eye, as I finger you to cry. Moan above my fingers’ thrusts, like a tortured soul of lust.’”

She scowled.

“Well?” the Hatter asked.

“Well, everything seems wrong with that poem.” She folded her arms across her chest.

“Ha! You can’t find the one thing, can you?”

“I give up,” she said. “What’s the one thing wrong with it?”

“Beats me.” The Hatter turned to the Hare. “Do you know?”

The Hare shrugged, his flexed muscles glistening in the sunlight.

The woman blurted out, “I love you, Hare!” and mumbled back into sleep.

“Well then, have some more tea, Mr. Hare.” The Hatter poured another cup of emptiness.

“Milk?” the Hatter asked.

“Of course,” the Hare said.

The Hatter pinched the woman’s nipple again, over the empty cup. She giggled and then snored.

Alice asked, “Why do you pinch her nipples all the time?”

The Hatter said, “Why, to get milk for our tea, of course.”

“But there is no milk.”

“There is no tea, either,” sighed the Hatter. “Honestly. Do keep up.”

The woman shouted, “I love you, Hatter!” and mumbled back to sleep.

“Who is she, anyway?” Alice asked.

The Hare said, “This is Minnie. The most wonderful woman in the world.”

Minnie cried out, “Kiss, please!”

The Hare kissed Minnie’s lips until Minnie fell back to sleep.

He turned to Alice and said, “Would you like to hear a story? Minnie tells the best stories!”

“Yes, very much!” Alice said.

The Hatter lovingly brushed Minnie’s hair past her ear and whispered, “Minnie, wake up. It’s story time.”

Minnie’s eyes fluttered from a dream. She looked back and forth between the Hatter and the Hare.

“Oh, good,” she said smiling. “It wasn’t just a dream.”

The Hare kissed her cheek and said, “It’s story time.”

“But I don’t have a book to read from.”

Alice jumped in.

“I have a book.” She pulled it out of her pocket and looked at the title. “But it’s broken.”

“How can a book be broken?” asked Minnie.

“It says, ‘The Story of OMH,’ but that’s not right.”

“Let me see,” said the Hatter with an outstretched arm.

He took the book and showed it to Minnie.

Minnie said, “You’re correct. That’s not right.”

Alice nodded.

“It doesn’t say, ‘The Story of OMH,’” Minnie said. “It says ‘The Story of O.’”

“Really?” Alice said. She rounded the table to look over Minnie’s shoulder. As far as she could see, it read, The Story of OMH. She took the book from Minnie’s hands and read to herself the beginning. “Old Mother Hubbard lived in a cupboard…”

“You better read it aloud.” She gave the book back to Minnie. “It seems to work with you.”

Minnie started on page one and it was just how Alice remembered it. The starting scenes of O meeting her lover René at the park, taking the taxi ride, taking off her panties, and René removing her bra before arriving at a chateau. The scene where O is bathed by two chambermaids, then dressed in a collar and bracelets and cape and paraded in front of anonymous men.

Alice, the Hatter, and the Hare listened in silence as the erotic words left Minnie’s lips. The Hatter and Hare gazed upon Minnie with love in their eyes. Such a contrast to The Story of O. Every so often, the Hatter and the Hare drank from their teacups. Alice ignored the ridiculousness of them drinking nothing and listened to Minnie’s reading.

“‘Finally, finished with her, they moved away...’” Then Minnie stopped.

“What’s wrong?” Alice asked.

“What do they mean by ‘finished’?” Minnie said.

“You know,” she said. “They had an orgasm.”

“What’s an ‘orgasm’?” Minnie asked.

How confusing. Did Minnie have the same problem with reaching climax?

“You know when you have sex?” she asked.

The Hatter said, “Male or female?”

“No,” she said. “Sex like what they were talking about in the book.”

The Hare said, “They weren’t talking about gender?”

“No!”

Minnie murmured, “I think I may have completely misunderstood this story.”

The Hare and Hatter looked at Minnie and nodded sympathetically.

Alice observed the three of them. They seemed to love each other so much. And without having made love. Perhaps she could be the one to take them to a whole new height of appreciating each other. With both the Hatter and the Hare, there was ample penetration that could even provide Minnie with the orgasm she so deserved.

“I’ll do it,” Alice said.

“Do what?” The Hatter asked.

“I’ll show you what an orgasm is, and while I’ll definitely be able to get you guys to experience one, Minnie, I’ll do my best to make sure you have one, too.”

“Yay!” Minnie said. “Do I get to choose its color?”

She chuckled. “Orgasms don’t come in different colors,” she said.

“Then I guess I’ll have it in its normal color,” Minnie said.

Alice moved dishes, cups, saucers, and spoons down to the far end of the table.

“Hare,” she said, “I need you to lie down on the table.”

“Face up or face down?”

“Face up,” she said.

The Adonis lay his naked, muscled body on the table. His hairy chest filled and emptied with each breath. His penis rested flaccid at his hips. His strong legs and arms looked clenched even in their relaxed state.

“Minnie,” she said. “You need to kiss the Hare on the lips.”

“It’s a kiss?” asked Minnie. “Well, in that case, I’ve had puh-lenty of orgasms!”

She smiled. “The orgasm comes later. For now, love him with your kisses.”

Meanwhile, I’ll give him a hand job to make him hard.

Minnie sat in the chair beside the Hare’s head and looked into his eyes. Alice was about to reach for the Hare’s cock but stopped when she saw Minnie wasn’t kissing him.

Minnie sat there, and the two of them looked into each other’s eyes. Alice couldn’t believe it but watching them interact this way made her pulse race.

Minnie moved her head closer to his, still gazing into his eyes.

Amazing. He was getting hard just anticipating the kiss.

Alice watched the Hare’s cock come to life, growing bigger, increasing every inch their lips came closer together.

Alice’s nipples hardened.

Lord, this is so hot!

At last, Minnie kissed the Hare full on the mouth. The Hare pulsed, his length bobbed, aching for attention.

“Okay, Minnie,” she said. “You can stop kissing him and come over here. Now I want you to—”

Minnie continued to kiss the Hare.

For goodness sake!

“Minnie! Wake up!”

Minnie separated from the kiss but kept her eyes fixed on the Hare who smiled up at her.

“Now, come sit here”—she pointed to the Hare’s waist—“with a knee on either side of him.”

“That’s a funny way to sit,” Minnie said. But she climbed atop the Hare letting his cock nuzzle against her cleft.

“Now rock your hips back and forth on top of him.”

Minnie placed her hands on his abs and shifted forward and back along his length.

“Mmm. I quite like this trick,” Minnie said with a breathy voice.

“As do I.” The Hare took her hands in his. He watched the rapture in her face and seemed to take more pleasure with that.

“As do I,” the Hatter said.

The crazy man had a spoon stuffed down his pants like he was using it as a back scratcher but for his itches in other places.

Minnie brought the Hare’s hands upon her breasts, pushing them against her nipples. The Hare got the message and massaged them. Minnie arched her back, her head tilted up to enjoy the feel of skin and sunshine.

Alice had to make sure Minnie was good and wet for the Hare. She buried her fingers between Minnie and the Hare, feeling the moisture between Minnie’s folds, noticing the slickness of the Hare’s pulsating cock. Whoa. They were ready, alright. They felt like they had been ready for months.

“Sit up off of him,” she told Minnie.

Minnie kept right on moving her hips and looked at her with pleading eyes, “Do I have to?”

She placed a gentle hand on her face and smiled.

“Just for a moment,” she said. “I promise.”

Minnie sighed and positioned herself above the Hare, revealing the Hare’s impressive length. His hardness must have doubled in size from the attention Minnie gave him.

Alice wrapped her hand around the Hare’s cock and pointed it up at Minnie’s center.

“Okay, Minnie,” she said, “It’s time for you and the Hare to become one. Sit back down, take him inside of you. As slow as you need.”

She expected Minnie to require a gradual filling of her pussy. First the head of the Hare pushing past the entrance, time to feel that, to accommodate to his size. Then a slow inch further, overcoming any discomfort, letting subtle pain become pleasure. Releasing moans of delight. A slow inch further, and further, to fill her completely, with caution and attention to the sensations.

But that was not the case. Minnie drifted down onto the Hare in one movement. She must have been so wet inside, the Hare’s shaft clearly soothed and satisfied her aches more than caused any. To confirm her suspicion, Minnie’s face turned to rapture, and Minnie screamed out the Hare’s name.

The Hatter ran beside Minnie. “Oh, my love. You look positively stunning!”

He guided her chin with a delicate hand to his face and kissed her full on the lips. Minnie wrapped her arms around the Hatter’s head. Kissed him back with a passion Alice longed for. Minnie eased up off of the Hare, revealing much of his shaft, and impaled herself upon him once more. Her kiss with the Hatter became several deep kisses, one after the other, as she moved up and down the Hare, letting him fill her, again and again.

The naked Hare moaned. He met Minnie’s movements by thrusting up into her as she came down, his hairy chest covered with the rising dew of sweat. He kept right on handling Minnie’s breasts, lifting them, brushing his fingers across her nipples, gently tweaking them.

Minnie broke from the Hatter’s kiss, apparently to enjoy the sensations the Hare triggered at her core. The Hare shoved into her faster. No doubt, he would have no trouble with his climax, but would their exertions be enough for Minnie to have her own? Minnie was properly stuffed with a man’s cock, but she could be penetrated in other places.

To make sure Minnie had an orgasm, Alice looked at the Hatter. He had his pants open, his length in his hand. It was long and narrow. That was good. But she was not so sure the Hatter would be careful enough for what she had in mind.

She stepped to the Hatter, took hold of his cock, and stroked him gently.

“Hatter,” she said, “watch carefully what I do so you know how to do it later with this magnificent tool of yours.”

She kissed his cheek and gave his cock a squeeze before letting it go. She looked at Minnie and the Hare. Minnie sat planted firmly on the Hare, completely filled with his length, and moved her hips back and forth, keeping his full cock inside of her.

“Yes!” Minnie cried out, the open air kissing her body. “Oh, yes!”

The Hare grunted and growled as Minnie used his cock to stir inside of her. He ground his pelvis in circles against her.

Alice took off her panties and placed them on the tea table. The Hatter returned to pumping himself, the others let their moans echo through the tree-sized plants. Alice climbed behind Minnie, knees on either side of the Hare’s thighs. She moved Minnie’s golden hair over to bare the nape of her neck. Kissed her there once, twice, and hugged Minnie from behind. Alice rested her head against Minnie’s neck and shoulder. She placed her hands over the Hare’s, pressing them onto Minnie’s breasts. She squeezed Minnie’s body tight. Holding her. Loving her. She felt Minnie’s warmth through the front of her dress.

“This is the kind of love you deserve,” Alice whispered. “The kind of love every woman deserves.”

Minnie moaned.

Alice squeezed her tight. Minnie leaned her body into Alice, letting Alice hold her. When Minnie leaned her head back onto Alice’s shoulder, Alice kissed Minnie’s neck, tenderly, gently, in the fragile place behind the chin. Minnie sighed and continued to gyrate full with the Hare’s thickness.

She released Minnie. She picked up a teapot beside her. Its spout was long and narrow. Alice ran a finger around the ceramic lip.

“This teapot feels like rubber.” She stroked around the mouth of the spout and felt it get softer, more flexible. She placed the teapot under her dress in front of her waist with the spout poking out her dress. “This teapot is like having my own penis.”

Her waist tingled. The handle of the teapot melted warm into her skin, the back of the teapot collapsed onto her, all until she was left with the spout attached to her waist.

With the dress draping on either side of the spout, allowing the spout to protrude from under her dress, she moved closer to Minnie. She placed her hands on Minnie’s shoulders, and whispered, “Bend over and hug the Hare close to your body.”

As Minnie rested her body down, Alice planted kisses along her spine. Minnie and the Hare kissed each other. The Hare thrust into her. Alice caressed the Hare’s warm sac and traced the line underneath with her finger. It was slick from the juices flowing out of Minnie.

With her other hand, she traced the line on Minnie’s now exposed skin leading to her other entrance. Not as slick, so Alice joined the Hare by putting a finger alongside the Hare’s cock. She pushed her finger inside Minnie’s pussy and felt the underside of the Hare’s cock pushing back and forth against it. The stroking sensation Alice was giving the Hare must have been good for him, for he called out, “Yes!”

By the way Minnie moaned in response, stretching Minnie’s walls with her finger did good things for her, too.

Alice pushed in another.

She twirled her fingers inside Minnie, alongside the Hare’s length, working to get her fingers as wet as possible.

“Incredible,” Minnie cried.

She removed her hand and traced Minnie’s other opening with the moistened pads of her fingers. She placed kisses on Minnie’s lower back and with her other hand clutching Minnie’s bottom, she pushed her open and slid a finger inside.

“Mmm,” Minnie said through her kiss with the Hare, and Minnie clenched tight around her finger.

This isn’t going to be wet enough.

She looked at the spout sticking out of her and said, “This spout is like it has a never-ending supply of delicious, warm tea.”

She placed her hands at the lip of the spout, tilted the spout down, and collected the warm water in her hands. She rubbed the spout with her wet hands and brought the lip to Minnie’s dark entrance. She grabbed hold of Minnie’s fleshy cheeks and opened her to more easily accept this additional penetration. The tip of the spout pushed past Minnie’s clenching hole. Minnie gasped.

“Hatter,” Alice said. “You see how I’m being very slow?”

“Yes.” The Hatter rubbed his cock. “Slowly, slowly.”

Minnie resisted Alice’s penetration. She stopped pushing.

“Help Minnie relax,” she told the Hatter.

The Hatter stood beside Minnie, stroking her hair and whispered words to help her relax. Minnie responded by grabbing the Hatter’s cock and taking him in her lips. The Hatter cried out with shouts of pleasure. Minnie let her mouth drip freely, coating the Hatter with whatever wetness remained in her.

Alice looked at her spout and watched the tea pour in and spill out of Minnie, and when she felt less resistance, she pushed the spout in deeper.

“You’re doing great,” she called out to Minnie.

“Yes,” the Hatter said. “You’re doing great!”

She smiled. The Hatter was referring to something else.

Minnie presented less resistance again, so she pushed in deeper.

Minnie let the Hatter’s shaft fall from her mouth, dripping with saliva, and called out, “More, more!”

Alice glided in and out of Minnie, kneading her ass with her hands. Minnie rested her head on the Hare’s shoulder. Perhaps Minnie was fully concentrating on feeling Alice and the Hare thrust in and out of her. The Hare kissed her wherever he could reach. The Hatter’s slick-coated cock awaited more attention.

Alice said, “Hatter, it’s your turn.”

The Hatter went to Alice.

“Get behind me and kneel like me,” she said.

He placed a knee on either side of the Hare’s legs.

Alice lifted the back of her dress to bare her pussy, and leaned over Minnie.

“Ok, Hatter. Now that you’re behind me, go inside me. Remember how I did it.”

“Slowly, slowly,” he said.

“Right.” She placed her head and hands on Minnie’s back, keeping the spout inside Minnie, and she waited for the Hatter’s tip to penetrate her pussy.

When it did, she opened her eyes wide. He had pushed the head of his cock inside her, alright, but at the wrong opening. She wasn’t expecting to get her ass filled. But oh, it felt so good! The head slid right in having been slick with Minnie’s saliva.

The Hatter leaned over without pushing further and stroked Alice’s hair.

“Lovely,” he said tracing her cheek with his fingertips.

She shivered at his touch. So gentle. So dear. Goosebumps tingled her arms and down her back. At the same time, she felt her core flush with heat. She clenched around the Hatter’s length, wanting him to experience orgasm but seeing no way he could possibly stick that huge thing any deeper. Should she tell him to pull out and prep himself clean for her pussy? No. She didn’t want him to leave. At least, not yet. Having him fill her ass made her throb in places inside of her that she didn’t even know existed.

She hadn’t thought about it before, but perhaps she had never climaxed because she had been pleasing the wrong passage.

She slid a hand down past the spout between her legs and found the nub to stimulate. She rubbed herself with her fingertips, enjoying the new sensation behind her, and relaxed.

And the Hatter pushed deeper.

She wrapped her free arm around Minnie’s torso and held her tight as she rubbed herself faster. That cock felt hot, hot, hot, opening her wide, turning on waves of energy through her body.

The Hatter placed his hands on Alice’s shoulders and massaged them.

“You’re lovely,” he said. “So lovely.”

She rested her fingers at her clit and enjoyed how the Hatter’s hands massaged away the tension in her shoulders.

And the Hatter pushed deeper.

Hot! So hot! Her hand hastened, alternating between rubbing herself and sticking two fingers inside of her. Her two fingers became three when the Hatter pushed his remaining length into her, filling her completely. Right then, she had an immense appreciation for Minnie. There ought to be an award for any girl who can fully take a shaft inside each of her passages, much less just one from behind as she was feeling now.

The Hatter stayed there, keeping her fully stuffed. He leaned over and placed kisses on her back. She clenched around him, relishing his thickness penetrating her.

She closed her eyes. Taking in the moment. She could feel the Hatter’s hands on her shoulders again, kneading out the stiffness there. She could hear Minnie and the Hare kissing each other again. She could smell the lust wafting up from their bodies’ cores. She kissed Minnie’s back and could taste the salty sweat upon her.

“You are so lovely,” the Hatter said.

She pushed her hips forward—enough to ease a bit of the Hatter’s length out of her—then arched back against him. The re-entrance was as fiery as when he first inched that thick cock into her, and just as smooth, thanks to Minnie’s tongue.

She repeated the small movement. Back and forth, controlling the in and out strokes of his cock.

Minnie moaned. Oh, right. Moving her hips forward to relieve herself of the Hatter’s shaft pushed the spout deeper into Minnie.

Alice started up a slow rhythm, moving forward to delve into Minnie, moving back to take more of the Hatter’s lovely cock. She moaned with the rush.

Hot! Hot! Hot! His thickness opened her wide and she rubbed herself with rapid fingertips. The Hare joined the rhythm, thrusting into Minnie as Alice moved out.

“Yes!” Minnie called out. “Faster!”

Alice grabbed hold of Minnie’s waist and thrust inside her tea-filled hole. The Hatter followed suit. The Hatter held her waist and thrust his full length into her, pushing her deeper into Minnie.

“That’s it!” Minnie shouted. “Yes!”

The Hatter focused on a constant shuttling of his long cock. The blissful heat set Alice ablaze. She went back to rubbing her clit as the Hatter did the work, thrusting into Alice, pushing her into Minnie. His strokes shoved into both the women, and they moved together, jolted together, cried out together.

Alice felt connected to Minnie like twins experiencing the same feelings. She slid her free hand down Minnie’s arm, found Minnie’s hand, and clasped tight. Together they held hands, and the Hatter thrust into them, drove into them, filling them. The Hare kissed Minnie deeply.

Alice understood the love the Hare had for Minnie because Alice, too, wanted to make sure Minnie felt the loving orgasm she so deserved.

The Hatter throbbing in her dark channel. He was close.

And that was all due to me. Lovely Alice. The Hatter feels this way because of me.

“Oh!” cried Minnie. “I think I’m going to explode!”

“Me too!” the Hare said.

“Yes.” Alice smiled. “That’s an orgasm. Let it happen.”

Minnie cried out and the Hare cried out at the same time.

Their beautiful bodies tensed, shook, and shuddered, and she rammed three fingers deep inside herself.

Her walls pulse around her fingers. She squeezed her eyes shut. She screamed. Her muscles tensed. She clenched around the Hatter’s cock. All her nerves erupted. She had visions of fire sparks bursting, green and blue, red and orange. The Hatter thrust and pinned his waist against hers, and his seed filled deep within her uncharted passage.

And Alice realized she was wrong. Orgasms do come in different colors.

She opened her eyes, head spinning and dizzy. And soon she felt the table at her knees, the cool air blowing against her legs and face, and the heat of Minnie at her chest and the Hatter softening within her.

The four of them stayed still, all of them connected. All of them one. Her legs felt wobbly. She had to rest on Minnie’s back. The Hatter lay on top of Alice. She felt the weight of his love. It made the love feel solid. Real.

“Okay,” Minnie said. “I’m getting squished.”

The Hatter climbed off the table, and Alice carefully pulled out of Minnie, backing up on the table.

The Hatter caressed Alice’s face and said, “Lovely. Thank you.”

She smiled and kissed his cheek.

Minnie and the Hare held each other. The Hatter went to their side. When they saw him, they each reached out an arm to him. The Hatter put his head close to theirs to hug them as best as he could.

I believe I actually had an orgasm. Maybe that was all it took, to be penetrated in that untouched passage.

She took the spout in her hands and said, “This is like a regular, ceramic teapot.”

Her waist tingled and the teapot separated itself from her. She set it on the table, climbed off, and put her underwear back on. It was time to move on.

She turned to wish her friends goodbye, but Minnie had turned herself around, lying with her back on the Hare, and now had the Hatter on top of her in her arms. They were in a sweet embrace, in their own world. Better not to disturb them.

She wandered towards the forest.

Wow, I actually had an orgasm.

Since she could climax, she wasn’t a freak after all. She could, in fact, love a man as much as any other girl. And just wait until Carol heard about her successful orgasm!

Alice giggled. “I feel like I’m walking on air!”

Her giggles turned to laughter as she floated above the ground, the earth no longer pinching her feet. She scampered toward the forest of plants letting the puffs of air at her feet lead the way.

EXCERPT FROM “Alice’s Salacious Adventures in Wonderland”

CATERPILLAR EXCERPT FROM “Alice’s Salacious Adventures in Wonderland”

EXCERPT FROM “Alice’s Salacious Adventures in Wonderland”

She bit her lip. If she couldn’t go back to the village, perhaps this… creature could help her. He wore nothing but jeans, and one of his arms had a tattoo. As she neared him, she saw the ink on his bicep was a picture of an orange and black butterfly.

“Who are you?” the creature asked in the most rumbling sexy voice.

His words startled her. She had focused so much on his tattoo that she didn’t realize he had noticed her. And he had asked her a question. Who was she?

“I…” Could she answer the simple question? “I’ve grown so big and so small that I don’t know anymore.”

“That isn’t the only thing troubling you, is it?”

Lord, how his words reverberated inside her chest! Did he know about her inability to climax?

“There is something else.” She toed the grass.

“Tell me.” His deep voice thundered at her breast. The vibrations felt incredible.

“Um … My book doesn’t read what it should. The words are different.”

“What if you recite something from memory?” He raised his eyebrows, hiding them behind a hanging lock of his golden hair. “Recite a popular nursery rhyme.”

She thought about her rope-skipping days. She remembered the one about the dish and the spoon and said, “Hey diddle diddle with my pussy and fiddle ‘til I jump right over the moon. You dog you, laughing as you see me come. How my breath runs away as I swoon.” Her face burned a blush at what came out instead of the right words.

The man chuckled. Each low laugh echoed into a caress of her breasts. A jolt of electricity shot to her pussy.

“Yes. Well—” One of his hands reached out to her and brushed her hair out of her eyes. “That’s not quite how I remember it.” Another hand rested on her shoulder, and still another stroked her arm. Her heart quickened.

“Who are you?” She was breathless.

“I’m the caterpillar of these parts. At least”—he looked down at his body—“that’s the only creature I relate to.” His words shook even more at the places he touched.

She stepped closer to allow his full hands to rest on her, to feel more of those dreamy vibrations.

Another hand of his stroked the underside of her breast over her dress.

She pretended to ignore his touches. “Tell me about the butterfly tattoo on your arm.”

“Ah! Well,” He snuck another hand down the front of her dress and cupped her breast in his warm palm. She trembled. “I’ve never told anyone this but I feel close to you so I’m comfortable telling you. The truth is… that is… what I mean to say…” He looked off to a distant memory, but his hands stayed on task—if their task was to set her on fire. “I hope to someday be a better creature. One that people can like and respect, and not this ugly thing that I am.”

She tried to say, “Go on,” but his touches expelled the strength out of her voice. Her knees weakened. She could smell her tart scent rise from beneath her legs. Could he smell it, too?

“One day I will become a butterfly. A being that everyone will adore. It’s just a matter of when.”

“And…” Her nipple jutted out against the delicious heat of his palm and nimble fingers. She forced the words out, “why would a caterpillar wear pants?”

“To keep the smoke out of my eyes,” he said. Before she could ask what he meant, he spoke, “Now, what’s your name?”

He had a hand at the back of her neck, another on her shoulder, others stroking her arm and breast, and another hand planted flat against her other breast. He squeezed her gently there, playing with her nipple. Her pussy wanted attention. Demanded it.

“Duh... Alisshh… ice,” she managed to say.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Delicious. Now I must see for myself.”

He hoisted her in the air, high over his head. A long tongue emerged from his lips and disappeared under her dress. Soon she felt it stroke her panties. It pressed at her, intent on getting inside her. Its hot wetness slipped past the side of her panties and stroked directly along her pussy. She shivered and moaned when he found her clit. He flicked light licks that opened her. And in he went, straight inside of her.

He brought her closer to his lips, allowing her legs to sit on his shoulders. She inched down onto his shoulders with his head disappearing under her dress, and his tongue went in further, deeper, and found more to discover. He reached places her fingers never found. Whimpers escaped her lips. The sensation was mind-blowing.

Just when she thought his tongue brought her as high as she could go with a good tasting, he planted his lips at her center and hummed: “Mmmm!”

She had no idea a voice could feel so amazing!

She moaned her delight. His vibrating voice buzzed her from the inside out. The wetness of his tongue mingled with her juices and dripped down her legs.

His lips kissed her folds, his tongue wiggled all over inside, his deep voice growled into her.

Come on, Alice! she told herself. Reach an orgasm! You can do it! Focus, focus, focus!

She squeezed her pussy walls and worked at finding a rhythm that matched his tongue. His rhythm was slurp and lick, slurp and lick. So she squeezed and gripped, squeezed and gripped.

But it wasn’t happening. No orgasm.

She relaxed. There was no point in trying to climax. His fine tongue withdrew from inside her, slipped past her pussy, and stroked against her clit.

He set her down on the ground. She wobbled on shaky knees. She leaned on the mushroom for support.

“Indeed, you are.” He looked her up and down with appreciation.

She caught her breath. “I’m what?”

“Delicious.”

She laughed between her panting breaths. She still held on to the mushroom.

“You okay?” he asked kindly.

“Yes. I think so.” She put her free hand between her legs and rubbed her clit through her dress. She looked up at him. So many arms. And in his pants? What hid in there? And how many? “So what did you mean by keeping the smoke out of your eyes.”

“The queen was upset with me, so she said my cock was forever like a pipe. It’s been smoking ever since. So I wear pants to keep the smoke out of my eyes.”

“That makes no sense,” she said.

“See for yourself.” He unzipped his pants and stuffed his hand inside. He snaked it out in the open air. It looked like any other as far as she could tell. But then a puff of smoke drifted up out of the eye.

Astonishing! She stood up straight.

“It really is like a pipe!”

“Like I said. You can even smoke it.”

She laughed. “I can?”

She wouldn’t do that! She couldn’t! She didn’t even know the guy. He wasn’t even human! At least, not entirely. With all those hands…

and arms…

and biceps…

and buff chest...

and golden blond hair…

She surveyed the limp phallus hanging out of his jeans. What was it like to make a man hard? She watched puffs of smoke drift from his tip.

The hell with it! How many times will I get the chance to smoke a cock like a pipe?

She returned his smile and then rubbed her hands along his thighs. The jeans were rough against her palms. She wrapped a fist around his length and squeezed. It felt like putty. She pumped it hard.

“Gentle!” he said. “Gentle, gentle!”

“Oh!” She let go. “I’m sorry.” She felt like such a dunce. “I thought it feels good like that.”

He guided her hand back around his length. “It does. Later. Start gentle and when it’s hard, you can squeeze harder.”

She held him in her hand not sure exactly how to start. Perhaps the way to go was to stroke it like she would her cat’s tail.

Caterpiller watched without appearing to enjoy it.

“Is this okay?” she asked.

“You can keep it in your hand and squeeze it gently.”

She pulsed her clenching fingers around his cock. He closed his eyes. He grew in her hands. That seemed to do the trick. What if she rolled her fingers in a squeeze like playing piano?

She tried clenching each finger one at a time, rolling them along his member. He moaned.

“Is this okay?”

“Yessss.”

How big that thing was getting! So hot and hard!

His jaw dropped open and he tilted back his head, his long, golden hair resting on his shoulders. His lean abdomen glistened in the sun, his sculpted chest rising and dropping with each of his shuddering breaths.

Maybe it was time to start stroking it.

She eased her hand up and down his shaft that stood proud from its nest of amber hair. The skin seemed to stick to her hand. Surely, that didn’t feel good. She let go, licked her hand wet, and returned to sliding up and down. He watched her work.

“Is this okay?”

“Yes,” he said. “You can even go faster and harder, now.”

She tightened her fist, shuttling it along his tall length. She looked up at him and smiled. He smiled back with pleasure in his eyes.

She said, “I’ve never smoked a real pipe before.”

“You’ll like it,” he said. “Tastes like peppermint.”

She laughed. Putting her lips around his huge length, she inhaled. A cool, icy sensation filled her lungs. She pulled him out of her mouth and exhaled the smoke.

“It really does taste like peppermint!”

“Of course.” He sighed happily. “I said it would, so it does.”

She sucked on him again, pushing him deeper down her throat. His hands were on her head, shoulders, and breasts as she inhaled and exhaled the smoke.

She peered up at his face. He was lost in pleasure. She found it difficult not to be lost in her own. Those gentle, groping hands of his knew how to touch her. But this was about him. His pleasure. She also wanted to see what a climaxing pipe looked like and tasted like.

Her breasts swelled at his squeezing fingertips and she groaned. Her mouth probably wasn’t doing a good job on him considering how distracting his amazing hands were. Every time she groaned, her lips stopped working on his cock. And unless she brought him to climax quickly, her mouth might become too weak to finish at all. Best be quick about it!

She wrapped her hands around his length and rapidly rubbed up and down to make him come. When he moaned in pleasure, her whole body felt it. The vibrations of his groans and sighs shuddered within her. He was close. She could feel him throb and twitch. Clamping her lips down, she looked up at him. His face contorted and he exploded in her mouth.

His cum tasted cool and fresh. Like peppermint. What if it had tasted like chocolate? The world would be a much happier place if all men’s cum tasted like chocolate.

She drank down the sweet, invigorating liquid until he stopped spurting. She pulled his limp member out and stood on tiptoe with pursed lips. He bent over and she kissed his cheek.

“You’re a beautiful being,” she said.

He didn’t respond. Seemed too exhausted to say anything.

She sat on the ground and waited for him to compose himself. His phallus still puffed occasional wafts of smoke. After several minutes, he put his pipe back in his pants and zipped up.

She stood. Were those strands of gray hair on his head there before?

“Now, Delicious one. How can I help you?”

“You wouldn’t happen to know a way that I can be bigger?”

“I do indeed,” Caterpillar replied. The gray hairs were getting longer.

“Really?” Excitement fluttered in her chest.

“Break off a piece of mushroom from each side.”

She did as instructed. “What are these pieces of mushroom for?”

Gray hairs also grew on his arms.

“One makes you tall, and one makes you small." EXCERPT FROM “Alice’s Salacious Adventures in Wonderland”

When Dwarfs Meet Giants, and Other True Cosmic Fairy Tales

It’s easy to get lost in fantasy worlds through science-fiction movies and novels, but did you know that some of your favorite fairy tale characters actually exist in cosmic form? From dwarfs and giants to shape-shifters and buried treasure, the universe is home to a multitude of mystical objects.

White Dwarf Stars

You’ve probably heard of dwarfs like Happy and Sneezy (or Gimli and Thorin), but it’s unlikely you’re familiar with the space-dwelling dwarfs with names like Sirius B and ASASSN-16oh. White dwarf stars like these are typically about the size of Earth, which is pretty small as far as stars go. They represent one of three final stages of stellar evolution, along with neutron stars and black holes. Each star’s mass determines which one it will ultimately become. Stars much more massive than the Sun typically become neutron stars or black holes, and lower-mass stars end up as white dwarfs.

Our Sun will eventually become a white dwarf after it exhausts its fuel, but don’t worry — we’ve got several billion years to go! Before it is reduced to a white dwarf it will actually expand into a red giant, swelling out to encompass Earth’s orbit. But we don’t have to wait billions of years to see stellar giants … some already peek out at us from the cosmic deep.

Giants and Supergiants

The red giant star Aldebaran, located about 65 light-years away, is about 5,000 times bigger than Earth. Our Cassini spacecraft imaged Aldebaran through Saturn’s rings in 2006, but you can see it for yourself during northern winter. Just look for the brightest star in the constellation Taurus.

Fairy tale giants may be taller than trees, but these supergiant stars can be over 100,000 times “taller” than our entire planet! Supergiant stars are likely becoming more rare as time goes on. While scientists believe they used to be more common, our whole galaxy now contains just a small smattering of supergiants.

These massive stars grace the galaxy for a relatively small amount of time. They burn through their fuel extremely quickly — in just a few million years, as opposed to hundreds of billions of years for the smallest stars! Supergiants often end their lives in dramatic explosions called supernovae.

Betelgeuse — the bright, reddish star marking the shoulder of Orion — is nearing the end of its life and has expanded to become a red supergiant star. It is destined to explode as a supernova, which might happen tonight … or within the next few hundred thousand years.

Ghostly Solar Neutrinos

Even an average star like our Sun has some seemingly magical qualities. Each second, it sends billions of phantom-like neutrino particles out into space. They travel almost as fast as light and don’t usually interact with normal matter. Billions of them are zipping harmlessly straight through your body while you read this. Even at night they go through the entire Earth before reaching you!

But that’s not all … these ghostly particles are shape-shifters, too! Neutrinos can change characteristics over time, morphing between different versions of themselves. Spooky!

Buried Treasure in the Heart of the Galaxy

Extensive clouds of dust enshroud the heart of our Milky Way galaxy, hiding it from our view — at least when it comes to visible light. The dust isn’t as big a problem for infrared light, however, which has allowed us to get a glimpse of our galaxy’s chaotic core thanks to our Hubble and Spitzer space telescopes.

Future missions may peer into the galactic core in search of buried treasure — thousands of planets orbiting distant stars!

Want to learn about more cosmic objects? Find them here!

Make sure to follow us on Tumblr for your regular dose of space: http://nasa.tumblr.com

These two had me screech laughing the whole episode XD Though "Lord Rauth" is a little bitch for turning against his King like that. Nyota was SERVING as the evil queen, and Spock was actually serving her, hopefully she gave him that reward. 😜 Another wonderful banger of an episode that the cast looked like they had as much fun filming as I did watching it :D.

The ending for M'Benga's daughter though, girl I - 😢

𝑇𝘩𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑠 𝑎 𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑡𝑙𝑒 𝑔𝑖𝑟𝑙 𝑑𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑒𝑑 𝑖𝑛 𝑟𝑒𝑑, 𝐴 𝑏𝑟𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑠𝑜𝑢𝑙 𝑤𝑖𝑡𝘩 𝑎 𝑏𝑎𝑠𝑘𝑒𝑡 𝑠𝘩𝑒’𝑠 𝑙𝑒𝑑. 𝑃𝑢𝑟𝑒-𝘩𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑢𝑛𝑎𝑤𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑡𝘩𝑒 𝑓𝑒𝑎𝑟, 𝐻𝑒𝑟 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑎𝑔𝑒 𝑠𝘩𝑖𝑛𝑒𝑠, 𝑡𝘩𝑜𝑢𝑔𝘩 𝑑𝑎𝑛𝑔𝑒𝑟 𝑖𝑠 𝑛𝑒𝑎𝑟.

𝑇𝘩𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑠 𝑎 𝑚𝑎𝑛 𝑖𝑛 𝑔𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑛, 𝑠𝑜 𝑏𝑜𝑙𝑑, 𝑊𝑖𝑡𝘩 𝑎 𝑏𝑜𝑤 𝑖𝑛 𝘩𝑎𝑛𝑑, 𝑎 𝘩𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑡 𝑜𝑓 𝑔𝑜𝑙𝑑. 𝐻𝑒 𝑟𝑜𝑏𝑠 𝑡𝘩𝑒 𝑟𝑖𝑐𝘩 𝑡𝑜 𝘩𝑒𝑙𝑝 𝑡𝘩𝑒 𝑝𝑜𝑜𝑟, 𝐴 𝘩𝑒𝑟𝑜’𝑠 𝑠𝑝𝑖𝑟𝑖𝑡, 𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟 𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑒.

—A lady and her quill, Courage Worn in Scarlet and Green

—𝓐𝓵𝓲𝓬𝓮 𝓲𝓷 𝓦𝓸𝓷𝓭𝓮𝓻𝓵𝓪𝓷𝓭

I want to tell you a story

I never really got a childhood. Sure, I had a beginning, but a troubled one. I became an escapist from day one, always flying to my imaginary world instead of the real one. I didn't like reality, and frankly, I still don't because of the people inside them. I had to grow up too fast. They pushed me into the blinding reality, and I got hurt. They laughed when I fell in my hole, and they never helped me get back out. I never forgave them for that. Now, as I look back, my beginning was stolen, my middle was me realizing it, and what will my end be? All I want is a happily ever after, something of fairy tales. I want to be the girl raised by wolves, or protected by the forest creatures. I want to find someone who makes me feel so loved I won't even have to doubt it anymore. I need something to prove me wrong that my end won't be as tragic as how it all was written in the start. It's time I pick up the pencil. It's time I start rewriting my life.

- Dreaming of Wolves// Short Stories

A small painting with miniature details.

Can you hear it? Can you feel it? 
It is coming
They are coming
They are the forgotten ones
They are coming to take their lands back
From now on no sight shall be without their unifying magic of insanity
They have been hiding in your eyes
In your eyes

Just some art stuff.