Fhjy Spoilers - Blog Posts

ok now picture this: fantasy high senior year….emily axford as mary ann scuttle

theres something on here that i really really regret now :]

I know Brennan established that Skrank Fucks™, But his new portrait is kinda…

Serving cloaca

The four horsemen of Intrepid Heroes season finales.

DIVINE SPRAY BOTTLE FOR KALINA FOR ONE THOUSAND YEARS!

Local man discovers lava is hot.

We’d all have a Happy Moonar Yulenear.

Is- Is Riz shorter than Kipperlily?

We might just have to “There is no live action adaptation of ATLA.” the entirety of K2’s whole deal. Nothing against K2. She’s a great bit. I just think it would also be a great bit to be like:

“How again did the bad kids get the Hangman through the giant Nightmare King Storm to return to Elmville in time to stop Porter’s ascension?”

“I think it was the gold tornado.”

“Yep, definitely the gold tornado and nothing else.”

Look, all I’m saying is—

Look, obviously Fabian’s only in love with Ecaf because he’s in love with himself, but whatever (totally tragic [not really]) ending their relationship may come to may be the resurrection of a long-forgotten Fabian ship: Fabrek. I mean, yeah, there are a total of two of us who ship this and we haven’t gotten content for it in like, 5 years and the only content we do have for it is from a live show a lot of people forgot about (I will never forget you, Hargis). But it’s possible, right? Right?

Please tell me someone remembers who Torek Railgrinder is.

These screenshots are my Roman Empire.

No context FHJY episode 1 spoilers:

so… are the scars in the shape of autopsy incisions?

like that would make so much sense, bringing them back from the dead only to have them marked with the symbol of the death they couldn’t accept. I think that Brennan described a “y” shape at one point, which is the shape used to open up a body cavity for autopsy

i really need someone to tell me im not crazy

so like…this is 100% why ivy had That Reaction to fig disguised as lucy, right? it wasn’t that she saw through the disguise, she just saw her once dead friend now revived (like the rest of the party had already been) and thought lucy finally chose ankarna (chose them)

noooo girlieeeee

can't believe jace was condemned to hell/prison because people think he's banging porter

i've been pretty distracted by all the sapphics this season so maybe someone pointed this out and i didn't see it but - jace was murdered and brought back under porter's control with a rage star, he was never evil at all as far as we know. but even before brennan said jace and porter are a 'duo' people have been shipping him with porter, so everyone just accepted that he was evil because yeah he's banging the evil guy. the bad kids burn a couple of him alive, one of them is arrested (and then also burned i think?) and his only crime was choosing to come back to life to worship a rage god which yeah after getting murdered by your coworker i think that's fair. he didn't know porter would control him because ankarna didn't know that porter was controlling anything, he was on that devil's honey.

imagine being brutally murdered out of the blue by your coworker, a nameless god offers to revive you if you'll worship her and then you come back to life only to realise it was the same fucking coworker who can now mind control you. and then you get murdered four more times and you stop being mind-controlled but no one wants to bring you back because they think you were fucking your murderer. the life of a twink.

thinking about how kipperlilly even knew who riz was or why he was important and - riz was spying on porter and jace when they were investigating the cafeteria to make sure they didn't try to cover it up. even if he didn't spot riz, porter then went to check on the bad kids of whom riz was missing. it wouldn't be suspicious at all for porter to look into the kid who randomly disappeared after the principal died, in fact very sensible to check for his guardian and address to make sure he gets home safe.

maybe he asks someone from his rogue class if she knows anything. mentions that goldenhoard seemed to be very interested about his dad. pretends he's just concerned about a kid with a tough home life witnessing a murder on his first day.

maybe in her little black-and-white mind that means he's getting special treatment. maybe that was what porter intended.

we need a kipperlilly special on the complicated women podcast - she willingly chose to be possessed, those are some complex ethical and philosophical ramifications. for the sake of the argument i'm assuming porter also has control over her since the shatter star is a part of her, because the morality of choosing to become evil is so interesting. did she think she was going to become a hero somehow, or did she accept that she would have to be a villain to have the power she wanted? she wanted to be better than the bad kids but she kept her moral superiority about fairness and the rules, so was she aware that she couldn't beat the bad kids by playing fair? was her anger always at her own inadequacy, at the fact that she could never excel in the same way they did without cheating? was she projecting the entire time?

it's so fucking funny how quickly the bad kids switch from Battle Mode. less than a minute ago you were burning/suffocating pawns alive in lava but initiative drops and suddenly it's all nooo ankarna you need to forgive people! violence is not the answer! and yet it took them a solid hour of roleplay to be okay with bringing back the rat grinders because they were so pissed lmao

is the big bad of senior year going to be a baby now??

bruh one jace yelled out where k2 was to bring buddy back and the other says hey lemme push adaine tho

hot take - i don't care if none of the rat grinders get redemption, i just want them to at least be good villains because they've been built up all season as foils but they're actually kind of trash

people are starting to sympathise with the rat grinders now because they ARE the underdogs. they're outmatched by far and even if they're the villains people want to root for an underdog. they're weak because they were given the cheat codes and never learned anything because why would they?

it's so funny that fig was going to spare ruben if she could 'connect with him' GIRL, YOU'VE BEEN CATFISHING HIM ALL SEASON AND JUST KILLED HIS FRIEND. i love emily's meta perspective of 'you wasted MY time by not being manipulated into letting me kill your friends! you know how long i spent on that psychological torment? how dare you cast a spell on me!' because she really put in the work with this but yeah of course he's going to psychic scream after being haunted by an illusion he fell in love with all year!

screaming into the ether: buddy doesn't know the plan! he worships ankarna, he doesn't know they want to kill her and will not agree with that!

episode 19 of me analysing d&d mechanics for storytelling purposes

enemies in d&d die as soon as they drop to zero hit points even if they have the exact same stats as the pcs. this depends on the dm, but that's how fantasy high works with i think the only exceptions being ragh and daybreak in freshman year. they cannot be healed from unconsciousness unless they are a main character, meaning the rat grinders WERE disadvantaged from the start by the game itself. if the bad kids were held to the same rules then kristen or k2 would have to reach touching distance to cast revivify on one person at a time, and even then as far as we know enemies in fantasy high cannot revive each other.

no matter how powerful they were or how much work they put in, the rat grinders would always be held back because when they die, they die. their only way out was to take the deal - in freshman year all of the bad kids would have died fighting the corn cuties if they had to play by the same set of rules. what would they have done if their only way back was to accept rage?

you are cassandra. in the middle of being possessed by the spirit of your vengeful, undead domain and feeling the world split apart with the festering carcass of your ex-lover being restored to grandeur only so she can be devoured completely, someone familiar approaches from the deck of a flying ship in active battle. your vision is warped, you're barely conscious, you don't know how it's possible that you're still alive, the figure blurs further and splits in two. one calls out to you, the same voice that has been reaching out for you all along, the same voice that called out your name the very first time and brought you to life. you ignore her. the other - clothes a little tighter, some subtle makeup, a pair of bicycle shorts patterned with a flag not known to this world. she opens her mouth - her teeth are horrible. 'blimey', she says, and you feel again. you feel something that crushes against your bones and shocks still your rotten heart. something cuts itself loose from your chest and escapes with a virulent tear of pain through your throat. lightning, bright and sharp, gushes from your screaming maw to its true purpose, and then she's gone. it's over. 'blimey', it whispers into the ethos, a memory as much as a promise to the tragedy of a dying star that may die forever. but you feel something else, you remember something or perhaps you are only now recognising it that nothing can be done. something else that lived in that void of space, you think. nothing more than a collection of cells yet, and still the weight pushes you to your knees. two lines on a stick, you reason, perhaps not even a choice to be made at all. surely not a life to be lived, you tell yourself as the memory of possibility dissolves and the void envelops the very space that baby might have occupied.

'blimey', the whispers consume what's left of your aching heart. 'blimey', you echo.

my dumb ass certain that ragh's dad was a sunstone

trying to clear some stuff up with the rat grinders pls add stuff i miss:

oisin got buff over the summer, the same time he would have gotten a rage crystal

maryann is a barbarian with insane athletics and porter's been teaching her, he might have connected with the high five heroes through her in the first place

kipperlilly didn't want to be called the rat grinders because it gives away some of their secrets but ruben just wanted to fuck with her

the rats that lucy revived were either killed out of spite by the other rat grinders or they were just collateral when porter fought monsters

oisin only started missing ping pong balls after talking to adaine when she said she didn't remember him and talked about how rich she is, maybe because he felt justified then

buddy presumably thought they were actually restoring this goddess even though she was competing with sol and helped anyway

they all genuinely thought lucy was coming back so 'killing' her wasn't ever meant maliciously by the rat grinders

they could have had a suicide pact all planning to take the deal and come back and just lucy didn't follow through

so with the next cleric they didn't give him any warning so he would make a split-second decision to come back to life without necessarily knowing the consequences

riz shows up in legend lore because he summoned the night yorb. if kipperlilly is reviving ankarna just so she can be mentioned in the legend lore wiki i will forgive all of her crimes

we're really going to get a moment of truth next episode because when freshman year kristen died she went to heaven, but daybreak went to hell. freshman year kristen's only problem was trying to convert people, she was never bigoted or hurt anyone so of course she'd get into heaven. daybreak was a hardcore believer in helio but he was a bigot and a part of a cult plot to bring about the apocalypse, so of course he went to hell.

buddy has had some moments that make him seem evil/bigoted and if he was involved knowingly in the rat grinders plot then he'd be going to hell. helio might suck but he doesn't get to bring whoever he wants into heaven and even if he did he wouldn't bring buddy if he'd been plotting to revive ankarna. but if buddy is actually a good kid? if he had the same beliefs as freshman year kristen, if he thought helio loved everyone and didn't think religion was the basis of morality?