mor-ranr
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Latest Posts by mor-ranr
[image id: a four-page comic. it is titled “immortality” after the poem by clare harner (more popularly known as “do not stand at my grave and weep”). the first page shows paleontologists digging up fossils at a dig. it reads, “do not stand at my grave and weep. i am not there. i do not sleep.” page two features several prehistoric creatures living in the wild. not featured but notable, each have modern descendants: horses, cetaceans, horsetail plants, and crocodilians. it reads, “i am a thousand winds that blow. i am the diamond glints on snow. i am the sunlight on ripened grain. i am the gentle autumn rain.” the third page shows archaeopteryx in the treetops and the skies, then a modern museum-goer reading the placard on a fossil display. it reads, “when you awaken in the morning’s hush, i am the swift uplifting rush, of quiet birds in circled flight. i am the soft stars that shine at night. do not stand at my grave and cry.” the fourth page shows a chicken in a field. it reads, “i am not there. i did not die” / end id]
a comic i made in about 15 hours for my school’s comic anthology. the theme was “evolution”
"homosexuality is unnatural! there's only two genders! it's a sin-"
I'm sorry, have you seen NATURE???
and there's so many more species than this that exhibit homosexuality, varying genders, etc. SO! MANY!
it's very much a natural thing. it always has been. unfortunately, while homosexuality is found in many species, homophobia is only found in one
ALSO THE ARTIST IS HUMON, FIND THEM AT HUMONCOMICS.COM!! was so sure I had included that but apparently I forgot, so sorry!
Senpai says you’re welcome
The Great Timeline of Hyrule — and it's linear
After a lot of work, I've finally worked out a fully linear timeline of Hyrule that makes sense. Be warned that this timeline doesn't mince words, and there's a lot of questionable-to-abhorrent politics that happen, especially around Ocarina of Time.
The goddesses create the world of Mudora as a place to live in. They then shed their divinity, becoming the oracles, and their divine power becomes the Triforce. Their newfound mortality strips them of their ability to protect the world as its creators, so they appoint the goddess of sky and light (Hylia) and the goddess of earth and time (the Gerudo snake goddess, placeholder name Geluda) to watch it in their stead.
The first hero is born into the world, a normal, unremarkable Mudoran.
The three oracles reach their first death, beginning their reincarnation cycle. With their passing, Demise and his demonic forces break into Mudora to seize the Triforce.
The Demise of Mudora: Demise wages full war on the surface, targeting the goddesses' creations to deal the most damage and cause the most despair. The more robust races of the world (Gorons, Parella, etc) are able to fight back, but the fragile humans have no precedent for harsh environment and are caught in the crossfire. In the fight, Geluda's sword spirit, Gyra, is stolen and corrupted, becoming Ghirahim. Beloved is killed in a demon raid.
Geluda sacrifices herself to create the initial seal on Demise. Hylia sets her plan into motion; she makes Beloved into the world's immortal hero, creates Fi based on Ghirahim's design, sends the humans, sword, and Triforce skyward to safety, creates the Loftwings to guide them and the cloud barrier to hide them, and assigns Impa to guide her future self to safety. Before shedding her own divinity, she appoints the sorceress Laciana as Guardian of Time in Geluda's stead, having her watch over the timeline from the Valley of Seers to ensure that her plan goes smoothly.
Hylia's divinity is split; her incredible power is housed within Zelda as the Light Force, her light magic, and her sealing ability, all of which will be passed down through Zelda's descendants. Her superhuman senses are gifted to the Sheikah as the Eye of Truth, which are adapted over time into use as the Sheikah's unique magic (seen in BotW, primarily). Her ability to see timelines and immortality are gifted to Laciana to aid her in her appointed task of watching over Hylia's great plan, and her ability to reincarnate as the oracles do is gifted to Beloved, so that Mudora may have a hero after she's gone. When Zelda eventually dies, she'll return to being Hylia, but will be unable to interact with the world save for through Link.
Thousands of years pass, and the Demise of Mudora fades into obscurity. The isle sent skyward develops its own culture as it waits for Beloved and Hylia to be reborn and finish what the goddess started.
The events of Skyward Sword take place. Timelines experience their first fray, weakened by excessive use by the first Link and Ghirahim, but are course-corrected by Fi. Demise curses Link and Zelda, and Fi goes to sleep within the Master Sword; the curse follows Link into the course-corrected timeline due to Demise's consciousness being sealed within the sword, therefore being present in the new era.
The inhabitants of Skyloft abandon their home to settle the surface, some traveling far away to eventually found Labrynna, Hytopia, and Holodrum. The area directly below Skyloft is named Hyrule, in honor of Hylia, and Zelda is appointed as its first leader with her father's passing. The Triforce is kept safe by her family for generations.
The Wind Tribe separates themselves from the Hylians, focusing on preserving Skyloft's culture rather than adapting to their new home. With the absence of Loftwings, their ancestors' isle is lost to them, so they spend much of their efforts learning how to return to the sky on their own, making use of teleportation spells and wind gusts generated by the various bird statuettes around Hyrule. Eventually, they master this magic, and depart from the surface, resettling Skyloft and building their own civilization, far from the land below.
Zelda I is born, named for her ancestor that founded her country.
The Tragedy of Zelda I: The King of Hyrule breaks up the Triforce into three pieces, and hides the Triforce of Courage away, wary that his son will use its wishing power for selfish purposes. Upon his passing, the prince discovers this, and demands his sister tell him where the Triforce of Courage is hidden; when she refuses, he curses her to fall into a deep sleep, not unlike the sleep Skyloft's Zelda entered to keep Demise's seal steady.
The prince, filled with regret, tries everything in his power to break the curse and wake his sister up, but fails. In her memory, he decrees that every firstborn daughter of the royal family be named after her. The tradition of naming the Crown Princess "Zelda" begins.
Across the world, Queen Ambi of Labrynna begins the construction of her tower, in order to help guide her lover home from sea.
The Legend of Zelda's events take place; Link and Zelda III are born in the same era, and Demise's curse springs into action, possessing a blue moblin and giving rise to the first—and weakest—incarnation of Ganon. Ganon is killed by Link, causing the Triforce of Courage to manifest on Link's sword hand. This marks him as the reincarnated hero, the new Link, and the one to recover the Triforce of Courage from the old King's hiding spot.
Zelda II: The Adventure of Link takes place. After recovering the Triforce of Courage, Link uses his Triforce wish to wake up Zelda I. She relinquishes her claim to the throne to Zelda III, instead living out her life with her hero; her descendants inherit her vibrant red hair.
With the absence of Ganon to lead them, the monsters still roaming Hyrule run wild, becoming more and more of a problem as time goes on. Eventually, a new Link to the Hero rises up to face this threat, the Hero of Men, and uses the Picori Blade to seal Ganon's errant monsters into a bound chest. A holiday celebrating this feat is established.
A new Link is forged, the oracles are reborn, and the events of Oracle of Ages and Seasons take place. The Zelda of this generation is strawberry blonde (based on sprite, not on art), marking the shift of Princess Zelda III's bloodline from redheads to blondes. Ganon is revived by the Twinrova, a pair of witches exiled from the Gerudo tribe, and because Hylia's descendant is used in his revival, he gains the ability to reincarnate on his own.
On his way to bring Zelda home, Link encounters a massive storm. He wakes up on Koholint, and the events of Link's Awakening take place.
After Link's Awakening, Link recovers Zelda and makes his way home. Marin's sacrifice sticks with him, and he realizes she was based on the girl he ran into in Holodrum, Malon. When he has his own family, he names his daughter Malon in Marin's memory, bringing the name to Hyrule. Link plants a Maku seed in Hyrule, which will one day become the Great Deku Tree.
The Triforce, whole and known to the public, becomes the target of ambitious and greedy people all throughout Hyrule. The Great War for the Triforce begins, and is ended abruptly by the Sages of Hyrule sealing off the Sacred Realm, cutting Hyrule's population down to a mere fraction. The Sacred Realm becomes the Dark World, and the newest incarnation of Ganon fights his way to the top of the masses.
Meanwhile, Lorule's seven sages opt to destroy their Triforce rather than seal it away, causing their world to start to decay. Without the power of the goddesses keeping it stable, Lorule begins to lose its ability to sustain life.
A new Link is forged, and the events of A Link to the Past occur. The Master Sword is used for the first time since Skyward Sword. Ganon is defeated again, and Hyrule falls into a short era of peace.
A new Link is forged, and the events of A Link Between Worlds occur. Yuga revives the Sealing War's Ganon, but fuses himself with him, forcing the curse to abandon that body as a means of incarnation. Zelda and Link wish on the Triforce to bring back Lorule's Triforce, saving it from extinction, and Link returns the Master Sword to its resting place.
Princess Styla of far-off Hytopia is cursed by a vengeful witch. Her distraught father sends word to Princess Zelda in hopes that she might have a means to break the curse, and Link is sent to help.
The events of Triforce Heroes take place. As thanks for freeing his daughter from the curse, the Hytopian king opens up trade with Hyrule, bringing in a variety of fabrics and other such treasures.
Octavo has his fortune told. Panicking over his foretold death and not trusting Link to fight this new Ganon, he takes matters into his own hands and incapacitates everyone who would oppose him via the Golden Lute.
Cadence falls into Hyrule from the Triforce's call
The events of Cadence of Hyrule occur. Demise's curse takes its first human victim, a young Gerudo prince, and the Twinrova, in their search for immortality, temporarily become the Synthrova. Deku Scrubs, Gerudo, and the first instance of shark-like Zora migrate into Hyrule's borders, and the presence of the new Zora begins to drive out the River Zora population. The Lost Woods gain their more sinister properties of creating Stalfos and Skull Kids as they try to protect their home.
Prince Ganondorf has become Ganon, his beast form resembling his previous blue moblin self. His actions are immortalized in Gerudo ruins, and he's sealed away by Cadence, Zelda, and Link working together. Demise's curse is unable to take a body until this one is killed.
Cadence returns home. An era of peace reigns.
Octavo's lost locket is used by the Minish Sage, Ezlo, to create an object based on the Triforce. Vaati steals this object—the wishing cap—and becomes a sorcerer. The new oracles are born.
A new Link is forged, and the events of Minish Cap occur. The Picori blade is reforged into the Four Sword, and Vaati is imprisoned within it. Zelda's power is mostly consumed by Vaati, leaving her and her descendants significantly weaker than Hylia.
The Minish return to their world through the Minish Portals, which close for the next century. Communication between the humans and Minish, which was already fragile, ceases.
A monster escapes the Four Sword's seal, having fled Hyrule as soon as the Bound Chest was broken. He takes the name Malladus, and terrorizes the far-off land of the Lokomo, only to be sealed away. The Spirit Tracks are created as his shackles.
A new Link is forged, and the First Calamity occurs. Demise's curse, unable to take a body, assumes the form of Calamity Ganon for the first time. The Sheikah, in service to the Hyrulean Royalty, orchestrate a plan to take this monstrosity down, creating the Divine Beasts and Guardians and making trials for the Tapestry Link to endure. The Twinrova adopt young prince Ganondorf, with the hopes of harnessing Calamity Ganon's power though him.
With the defeat of Calamity Ganon, the King of Hyrule is fearful of the Sheikah Clan; he realizes that they could take his power from him whenever they please. He gives them an ultimatum: bury their technology and swear off its use and creation, or be exiled. The clan splits; those loyal to the king retain their Sheikah title, while those angry with him become the Yiga clan and vow to assassinate him in retribution.
Forced into exile, the Yiga are offered shelter by the elusive Wind Tribe. The small community blooms overnight, and the Yiga offer their technological skills to the Wind Tribe in exchange for their hospitality. With Skyloft-like guidelines for construction, the City in the Sky is made.
A group of Yiga mages work closely with the Wind Tribe members, devising a plan to end the cycle of destruction Hyrule faces and the king's reign in one swoop. The Fused Shadows are forged with the intention of assassinating royalty and stealing the Triforce from the royal family, with the caveat that the Triforce would be returned to the sky where it belonged once the Yiga were through with it.
The Great Civil War of Hyrule begins. The Yiga have no problem finding sympathizers in people that remember their valiant efforts to defeat the great Calamity years ago. The war rages for years, destroying Hyrule's fragile stability and dividing the nation into splinters.
A new Link is forged. Princess Zelda is born, and her mother dies in childbirth. Malon is born, named after her great grandmother (from Minish Cap). The King of Hyrule is successfully assassinated, as is his wife; his son (the new Zelda's father) assumes the throne.
The new king swiftly ends the war by pitting the Sheikah against the Yiga and their sympathizers. The Shadow Temple is used as a torture prison to silence any resistance, designed in such a way that only Sheikah and those with the Lens of Truth would be able to navigate it. The creators of the Fused Shadows are dragged to the desert for capital punishment, and are banished to the Twilight Realm for their crimes after extensive torture. City in the Sky sits abandoned.
The king enacts a strict set of laws. All subkingdoms in Hyrule are required to swear fealty to him, and are forbidden from contact with each other without express royal permission. Safeguards are put in place to prevent anyone from touching the Triforce without the king's order, and the Master Sword is enshrined in the Temple of Time, right next to the Hyrulean castle. Temples are littered with locks and royal magic that prevents their use. Zora's domain is sealed off, Death Mountain is gated, and the bridge to Gerudo is sabotaged. The Gerudo do not take well to this, and bar outsiders from their settlement, robbing any Hyrulean soldiers that dare trespass in their domain. Tensions between the Gerudo and Hyrule worsen.
Hyrule enters peace under a tyrant.
The events of Ocarina of Time occur. The Great Deku Tree planted by Oracle of Ages' Link is killed by Gohma. After Ocarina of Time, Link is sent back to the past by Zelda, where he prevents Ocarina of Time from happening; in the OoT timeline, the Twinrova are able to successfully draw Calamity Ganon's power through Ganondorf, giving him the means to destroy the world and assume a warped beast form; the power is there, but the curse is being forced through Ganondorf, so it doesn't take hold properly. In the course-corrected timeline that Zelda creates by sending Link back, the Twinrova never get the opportunity. Princess Zelda and Link alert the king, and the story of the Hero of Time is recorded and spread.
Majora takes control of Skull Kid
Link shatters the Triforce of Courage and hides it around Hyrule so Ganondorf can't take Hyrule over, is given the Ocarina of Time by Zelda for safekeeping, and returns to the Lost Woods to search for his fairy companion. He's baited by Skull Kid into falling into Termina, and Majora's Mask occurs.
Ganondorf is tried for treason, found guilty, and slated for execution. He fights his way out of the castle and flees home, then wages war on Hyrule.
After the events of Majora's Mask, Link stays in Termina. His old home isn't for Hylians, and the rest of Hyrule holds a lot of pain and traumatic memories for him. He marries Romani.
The Gerudo-Hyrulean War is more vicious than the Civil War, the Gerudo having far different tactics than the Yiga did, and the king not having an inside perspective like he did with the Sheikah. Because Link keeps the Ocarina of Time, the king has no access to the supreme power of the gods. The people of Hyrule pray that the Hero of Time will return to end the war.
Prince Daphnes and a new Zelda are born to Princess Zelda as her father ages, keeping the royal line from dying out.
When the king passes, OoT Zelda assumes the throne. She acts quickly, breaking into the Temple of Time with Impa's help. The Triforce of Wisdom is shattered; Queen Zelda gvies part of it to Prince Daphnes and part to little Princess Zelda, and has them flee the castle. She takes the Triforce of Power and runs to the castle. Ganondorf then storms the castle with an army of monsters, and loses them to Queen Zelda sealing them in place with the Master Sword's time-altering abilities. The queen is then killed, and the Triforce of Power falls into Ganondorf's hands, at the cost of his forces.
Prince Daphnes receives the news of his mother's demise and unwillingly takes the throne. Blinded by rage, he assembles an orchestra, and ends the war with a flood summoned by the Song of Storms. Ganondorf isn't seen for centuries, and the Twinrova curse the new king with their dying breaths, turning him into a boat to sail the seas he just made out of his country.
Hyrule fades into obscurity. The Zora have a sharp split; some adapt to the salinity, becoming more sharklike and diving into the depths to find food. Others are unable to adapt, and are gifted wings by Valoo, eventually becoming the Rito. The Kokiri are changed into the Koroks, and the Deku Sprout grows up into a massive new Deku Tree.
A new Link is forged. The events of Wind Waker occur. The Master Sword is used to finally kill Ganondorf, and the reassembled Triforce is used to wash old Hyrule away for good. With Hyrule flooded, Calamity Ganon can no longer rise, and the cycle is, momentarily, broken. Deku Sprouts are spread all over the Great Sea; one of these will eventually become Breath of the Wild's Deku Tree.
Link and Tetra travel to find a new land to settle, and the events of Phantom Hourglass occur. The Ocean King is restored to his place of power over the waters, ensuring safe travels to the new land.
Tetra's crew (and Linebeck) finally find solid land where the Lokomo live. They're welcomed with open arms and work with the Lokomo to make the country a safer and more stable place. Tetra's efforts don't go unnoticed (nor does her sass), and she becomes the first elected leader of New Hyrule, and the first elected leader of Hyrule since Skyward Sword.
A new Link is forged, and the events of Spirit Tracks occur. Malladus breaks free and is destroyed by Link and Zelda working together, and the Lokomo sages ascend to the heavens to be reincarnated at a later date.
The Great Sea finally starts to recede. Archaeologists rediscover old Hyrule, and as time passes, more and more people from New Hyrule—including a young adventuring princess—resettle the land. Ancient Hyrule is reborn.
A new Link is forged, the Four Sword is rediscovered, and the current Zelda realizes the seal is breaking. The events of Four Swords happen, in the wild, unsettled parts of Ancient Hyrule. Vaati is released, then resealed as fast as possible.
The events of Four Swords Adventures happen, releasing Vaati and eventually freeing Cadence of Hyrule Ganon. Vaati is eliminated, Ganon is defeated, and the curse of Demise is finally free to inhabit another body.
A new Link is forged, and the Gerudo King invades Hyrule as Demise's curse latches onto him. The War for Ancient Hyrule ensues.
At the conclusion of the war, Ganondorf is slated for execution. The Triforce of Power manifests in him and prevents his death, so the sages banish him to the Twilight Realm.
Ganondorf assumes an incorporeal form as the Triforce of Power protects him from the effects of the Twilight Realm. He convinces Zant that he's a god, grants him a fraction of the Triforce's strength, and usurps Princess Midna. Ganondorf experiments with Malice (red Twilight magic), and Demise's curse learns from it.
Zant invades Hyrule, fording Princess Zelda to surrender or have her men killed in front of her.
The events of Twilight Princess occur. The Master Sword is rediscovered, and Midna kills Zant. During the final fight between Link and Ganondorf, Demise's curse experiments with a new beast form. Ganondorf is killed by Link using the Master Sword, with Zant dealing the final blow with his fragment of the Triforce of Power. The Triforce leaves Ganondorf, and his soul is shattered into four.
The Time Door is used to access points in time where the timeline is weakened from overuse—Skyward Sword and Ocarina of Time—and two pieces are left in the past. Midna takes one of the remaining two pieces and Zelda takes the other for safekeeping, effectively ending the curse for as long as the shards stay separate.
Ganondorf's body is sealed away by Midna, keeping it in suspension and preventing a new incarnation from occuring, locking Demise's curse out from proper reincarnation.
A new Link is forged. Desperate for freedom, Ganondorf's soul corrupts Laciana, shattering her into Lana and Cia. Hyrule Warriors occurs, Ganondorf's soul comes back together, and Demise's curse forms a replacement body; this isn't a new incarnation, because Ganondorf's soul hasn't been ended properly, and his real body is still intact somewhere, so the replacement is far more fragile, and only lasts as long as it does because of the Triforce. When Link defeats Ganondorf, the Triforce is used to destroy his soul for good. Demise's curse is unable to use this incarnation any further.
Unknowingly at a stalemate, Hyrule settles into an era of peace and prosperity. Learning from past mistakes, the curse bides its time and waits for Hyrule's guard to fall. Meanwhile, the subkingdoms expand, Hyrule becomes bigger and more prosperous than ever, and the royal family's power wanes as the subkingdoms become more independent.
Sheikah technology is rediscovered, and Ganon's return is prophesized. Hyrule begins preparing with Sheikah guidance, and Rhoam is far less fearful of the Sheikah than the last king to order this was.
A new Link is forged, and quickly becomes recognized by Hyrule for who he is.
Final preparations occur; the champions are selected, Link is assigned to be Zelda's guard, and Zelda frantically tries to awaken her sealing power.
The Great Calamity occurs, and Hyrule is subjected to 10,000 years of planning, as Demise's curse has learned from its mistakes. The Master Sword itself begins to break, and Hyrule falls.
The events of Breath of the Wild occur. Link is revived, Zelda is freed, and the unbound curse of Calamity Ganon is sealed.
Midna's seal on Ganondorf's body weakens, allowing the curse to finally inhabit a (soulless) body again.
The events of Breath of the Wild 2 occur.
AND THAT IS EVERYTHING
"Official" Link count sits at 13: Skyward, LoZ, Oracles, ALttP, ALBW, Minish Cap, OoT, Wind Waker, Spirit Tracks, Four Swords, Twilight Princess, Hyrule Warriors, Breath of the Wild.
I might make dates and a chart for this if I have the time tomorrow.
The beef between night owls and early birds is so silly. We complete each other. Evolutionary-speaking, wouldn’t it be useful to have people naturally alert at dawn to watch for saber tooth tigers and people alert at midnight watching for like, wolves?? Keeping us safe with internal clocks set to random.
All times of the day are beautiful.
I was explaining this to a friend recently and I think it's an important distinction to make: not all queerplatonic relationships look the same.
A good way I've found to illustrate what exactly a qpr is, is to say "a qpr is to relationships what nonbinary is to gender". While both of these traditionally function on a binary (male/female, platonic/romantic), by defining our personal outlooks and experiences of the concepts of gender and relationships with new terms, we challenge the boundaries that society has put in place.
And yes, whilst redefining what actually constitutes romantic or platonic relationships, or male and female identities, and what makes them different (and acknowledging where they overlap, or where they can expand past what we traditionally expect) is important to increasing our understanding, so is providing options entirely outside of those two boxes.
And that's what it is - options. It's very easy to trivialise the concept of nonbinary and simply make gender into a trinary, rather than a binary. Male/female/nonbinary, which goes against the very purpose of the nonbinary label. This further erases the spectrum of gender. It's the same with relationships - by giving a strict set of instructions on how a qpr must look and act, you are simply creating a trinary. The point of the concept of qprs is to acknowledge that there are relationships between people that may overlap platonic and romantic, or fall partially within one and partially outside, or ones that are entirely separate from either category.
There are an infinite amount of ways a relationship can manifest, and if the people in the relationship feel that queerplatonic best describes their partnership without romance, or their affection without commitment, or their feelings towards each other that aren't quite what romantic or platonic is to them, or any other reason that rebels against amatonormativity, then they can choose to use that term. Queerplatonic covers the widest range of relationships that come in all shapes and sizes.
I think it's so important when discussing topics like relationships and gender to consciously make the effort to keep queering our ideas of the concepts - to remember that a spectrum is a spectrum. Labels can be useful for finding community, identifying your experiences and validating your struggles, but as soon as you try to start hyper-defining them, you lose the radical nature of queering our understanding of ourselves and our relationships. We name these concepts in order to give a voice to our subversion of society's arbitrary rules and expectations, not to police each other into conforming to a particular understanding of how a person (with a certain label) "should" act or be.
I like to think of relationship anarchy as the foundation that shapes my understanding of aromantic theory.
It creates an inherently anti-amatonormative setting in which relationships are reevaluated and reconstructed based on the collective needs of the people involved. It's the reason I will always be against strict definitions of relationship types and the implicit requirements that come with that. The only people who can define a relationship and what that relationship entails and which label to give it are the people involved in said relationship. The only way to do that is through effective communication. The only way to fight amatonormative relationship hierarchies is through doing exactly that: discarding societies norms and instead explicitly defining your relationships based on mutual understanding, communication and respect.
Relationship anarchy gives aspec people the freedom to have any type of relationship they desire instead of being locked out of certain levels of intimacy simply because of some societal norm that dictates what you can and can't do based on which label you apply to a relationship.
Overly Honest Methods in science.
for an aro person, I fantasize a lot about intimacy. but not in a romantic context like smoochy ooky pooky boo-boo...hell no.
intimacy as in being completely emotionally open to/with someone, being so comfortable with them that you just feel safe and warm. I want to have that type of closeness with someone without having to feel guilty that I won't be able to give them romantic love.
it can be something so very deep within my core, but it's just...not romantic. is that so bad?
"friendzoning"? i think we should talk about romancezoning. as someone who's aro, it makes me incredibly uncomfortable if someone says they're romantically interested in me. i guess it could be a little flattering at first, but the idea of, like, my close friends secretly wanting a romantic relationship instead is. not a pleasant thought.
So uh….some dude apparently recreated Adobe Photoshop feature-for-feature, for FREE, and it runs in your browser.
Anyway, fuck Adobe, and enjoy!
!!!!
YOU KNOW WHAT
I'm gonna be cremated so archaeologists can't steal me bones. I don't want to know what they do with them.
Most ironic photos
Any other birds, apart from cassowaries, that look like dinos?
thick-billed ravens rank pretty high on the "jesus christ a dinosaur" scale imho
Aro culture is being both touch starved and touch averse so you end up just extremely cold for reasons you dont fully understand
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It'd be interesting to see what body languages you've learned from your snakes😊
Okay, I can give it a go! Unfortunately I don't have photos or videos of most of these behaviors so I'm hoping that my descriptions will be sufficient.
Corn snake body language, as interpreted by me, a human who can barely interact with other humans:
Behavior: Reaching with straight neck, body is relaxed, slow tongue flicks
Meaning: "What's that thing? I'm interested."
Behavior: Reaching with neck held slightly back but not an S-shape, body is tense, fast tongue flicks
Meaning: "That's probably food."
Behavior: Pressing with tip of nose, may be followed by a slow bite if the behavior is not interrupted
Meaning: "I'm like 99% sure this is food."
Behavior: Pressing with tip of nose, followed by wiping side of face along a surface, repeated
Meaning: "I'm trying to shed"
Behavior: Neck in an S-shape, head flattened
Meaning: "I don't like that."
Behavior: Neck in an S-shape accompanied by heavy breathing, puffed-up body, and hissing noise on exhale
Meaning: "I really don't like that."
Behavior: Fast, short strike accompanied by loud hiss noise
Meaning: "I really, really don't like that."
Behavior: Flailing body during handling
Meaning: "I don't feel safe, I need to get out of here!"
Behavior: Excreting yellowish liquid from the cloaca that smells like burnt plastic
Meaning: "I am very stinky and not at all delicious, please leave me alone"
Behavior: Wrapping tail or body around handler's hand/wrist
Meaning: "You are safe, please protect me."
Behavior: Vibrating tip of tail, may occur during other defensive behaviors
Meaning: "Leave me alone"
Behavior: Vibrating tip of tail during feeding
Meaning: "I'm busy right now, let me handle this"
Behavior: Shoving body firmly against human hand when touched
Meaning: "Don't touch me there"
Behavior: Twitching body lightly when touched, may be observed with humans or with other snakes
Meaning: "I'm the dominant snake" or "I'm very sexy"
Behavior: Twitching or writhing over their own body, often in a circle, only observed in males
Meaning: "I think I've found a sexy lady and I haven't yet realized this is my own butt."
Behavior: Clicking or a slight hissing noise not accompanied by any defensive behaviors. Snake may open mouth periodically
Meaning: "I'm sick. Please take me to the doctor."
Behavior: Rubbing nose against wall or ceiling of enclosure repeatedly. This is also called "Glass-Surfing"
Meaning: "I don't feel safe here and I need to leave immediately" or "It is breeding season and there have got to be other snakes somewhere nearby."
Behavior: Climbing on top of cage decorations or resting in high places
Meaning: "I like to be tall"
Behavior: Burrowing under substrate
Meaning: "I like to be snuggly"
Behavior: Rubbing face or entire body against cage decor, may be accompanied by constant movement/pacing, not directly associated with shedding.
Meaning: "I'm itchy" (Check for mites)
Behavior: Staring at keeper while in enclosure, often with raised head, may press nose against wall or ceiling of enclosure without rubbing
Meaning: "What are you doing? I recognize you."
Behavior: Sitting in water dish
Meaning: "I'm too hot"
Behavior: Sitting in empty water dish
Meaning: "I'm thirsty"
Behavior: Pooping in water dish
Meaning: "I have learned that this will be cleaned quickly. I am too intelligent to be trusted."
Behavior: Pacing cage, burrowing or attempting to burrow, accompanied by weight gain in back half of body only, observed in females. May also show disinterest in feeding
Meaning: "I'm gravid and I need a nest for my eggs."
Behavior: Refusing food
Meaning: "I'm too cold, I'm getting ready to shed, I don't feel well, I don't feel safe, or it's breeding season and I'm too distracted to eat" (Check husbandry and be cognizant of your snake's body condition, age, and sexual maturity)
I hope this helps somebody to better connect with their corn snake pals! If I've missed any critical behaviors, please let me know!
fat frog wednesday
bonus:
I love that the dinosaurs being portrayed as animals and not part of a 24/7 fight club, but the only thing I still want out of Prehistoric Planet is to see a hadrosaur beat the shit out of a theropod. I'm tired of them being docile carnivore fodder, I guarantee you they contained the same wrath of God as every extant giant prey animal does.
Hey just so you all know, the Prehistoric Planet Uncovered bonus episodes are actually being put up on the Apple TV official YouTube channel!
While it is really preferred that you do not pirate this series, if you absolutely have to for whatever reason, PLEASE watch the uncovered episodes on the official YouTube channel to show your support. These mini episodes are only around 5 minutes each and they really give a fascinating insight into all the science and research put into the show.
If we want more accurate dinosaur media where the dinosaurs actually behave like living animals, we need to show as much support as we can no matter how small.
[Edit: Updated to include all 5 Uncovered episodes]
Hallo, Aro is a series of flash fiction stories about allosexual aromantic characters navigating friendship, sexual attraction, aromanticism and the weight of amatonormative expectation.
I’ve now got twelve allo-aro short fiction and creative non-fiction pieces in this collection!
Folks can download PDF, EPUB and MOBI files for free from my Patreon, read individual stories on my WordPress site or view them all here on Tumblr:
Unspoken
Leaving
Friendship
Lucky
Attraction
Existence
Neuronormative
Loveless
Monstrous
Pressure, Side One
Pressure, Side Two
Abrasive
No story is longer than a thousand words. Please expect sex references in various degrees of explicitness and sundry depictions of amatonormativity.
IT IS NOT SELFISH TO FEEL LONELY
"but you cant possibly [do traditionally romantic stuff] with your friends—"
oh, but i can, because im not a coward.
step up, nerds.
MY FELLOW AROMANTIC SIMMERS I AM LOSING MY MIND
so the latest update to the sims 4 added sexuality customization. i was like “oh cool we can probably, like, make gay sims now instead of having everyone be bi. cool. good for the gays.”
I dared not HOPE that they would even think about aros but DUDE. THEY ADDED THE SPLIT ATTRACTION MODEL
YOU CAN NOW MAKE SIMS THAT ARE ARO, ACE, OR OTHERWISE HAVE SPLIT ATTRACTIONS VIA THE NEW SEXUALITY TAB IN THE CREATE A SIM (its under the same tab as the custom gender options)
[image ID: a small cropped screenshot of a notification from the sims 4, in which a sim says “I am not interested in romantic relationships.” end ID]
NO MORE DO WE HAVE TO SUFFER WITH THE (modded in from sims 3) UNFLIRTY TRAIT. THIS IS SO MUCH BETTER. IT STRAIGHT UP DELETES THE OPTION FOR ROMANTIC INTERACTIONS, BOTH PLAYER MADE AND AUTONOMOUS, FOR THE SIM AND FOR ANY SIMS INTERACTING WITH THEM WHO KNOW THEIR ROMANTIC ORIENTATION.
and!!!!!! then I thought!!!! no! it couldn’t possibly be! this is wonderful but they couldn’t possibly have moved the sexual interactions out of the romance tab, where they’ve always been in every sims game! if you only check the sexual attractions and leave romantic attractions unchecked it probably just like, doesn’t let you do them! they couldn’t possibly!
NOPE
[image ID: a cropped screenshot of the sims 4 showing some interaction options listed under the “friendly” category in the interaction tree. the highlighted interaction is “ask to be WooHoo partners.” end ID]
WOOHOO PARTNERS. FWB. A COMPLETELY NEW RELATIONSHIP TYPE THAT UNLOCKS WOOHOO INTERACTIONS WITHOUT REQUIRING A ROMANTIC RAPPORT LIKE YOU’VE ALWAYS NEEDED IN THE SIMS.
[image ID: a cropped screenshot of the sims 4 showing three different WooHoo options listed under the “friendly” category in the interaction tree. end ID]
LOOK AT IT. IT PUTS THE WOOHOO OPTIONS UNDER THE FRIENDLY TAB.
this is alloaro representation! this is legitimately alloaro representation, with gameplay dedicated to alloaro relationships!
fuck EA and the Sims for their cashgrabbing DLC nonsense and etc but whichever individuals on the dev team are responsible for these features, you have my respect
Dragons are basically fish, when you get down to it.
There’s no such thing as fish. The word doesn’t have any taxonomic meaning. It’s a word we’ve used to describe everything from hagfish to goldfish, even though a coelacanth is more closely related to a camel than a salmon. But because they inhabit the same ecological niche of “vertebrate animal with gills and fins,” we call them all fish.
Likewise, there’s no such thing as dragons. We call anything that fills the mytho-ecological niche of “dangerous animal that blocks the way” a dragon. And that’s why any kind of argument of what does and doesn’t count as a dragon is moot — wyverns are dragons just as much as a jabberwock or a jaculus or a tatzelwurm, not because they’re closely related in a biological clade but because they fill a narrative niche.
Dragons are also lobsters, but that’s for unrelated reasons.
*through gritted teeth* every day i choose to be kind *barely restraining myself from violence* i choose to have compassion *tamping down the vicious bloodlust inside me* i choose to care and to be kind and to love
Aro culture is realizing that instead of a romantic relationship you just want to mean something to someone
.
In case anyone is having a bad night:
Here is the fudgiest brownie in a mug recipe I’ve found
Here are some fun sites
Here is a master post of Adventure Time episodes and comics
Here is a master post of movies including Disney and Studio Ghibli
Here is a master post of other master posts to TV shows and movies
*tucks you in with fuzzy blanket* *pats your head*
You’ll be okay, friend <3