The Beef Between Night Owls And Early Birds Is So Silly. We Complete Each Other. Evolutionary-speaking,

fat frog wednesday

bonus:

If The Types Came with an Instruction Manual: INFP Edition

Congratulations! You are now the proud owner/friend of an INFP! Here are a few things to take note of with your new best friend! Oh, you didn’t know INFP was now your best friend? Well now you do, because if you have one, it’s going to stay by your side for pretty much ever.

1. Your INFP comes with the innate ability to scope out good and bad! This particular model is very good at determining whether or not a person is being truthful and genuine or totally fake! You just acquired a lie detector as well. Your INFP will be able to break a person down in about 5 minutes flat !On top of that, they will warn you as well like the little Golden retrievers they are! 2. Your INFP is an INTROVERT! This means that more often than not, your INFP is going to be just as happy staying in and watching a movie by his or her self, than going out. So remember to keep the super social things down to a small amount or this will drain your INFPs battery.* They tend to like one on one things or a small group often a maximum of 3-5. Be sure to ask INFP how they feel. Be prepared for a 30 minute conversation.

*CAUTION: If INFP loves you, INFP will try to force itself to go to gatherings so as to make you happy. Then you will not see INFP for a week or more. Be careful with INFPs willingness to participate as likely they do it for you.

3. INFP cares Deeply!! Your INFP comes standard with the ability of caring too much and too deeply. Usually this trait makes them resent themselves more than anything, but when they find that person who appreciates them for it, they become very happy and stick to you like glue. Please be sure to listen to INFP when they speak and try your best to understand them, because 99.9999% guaranteed, your INFP listens to you and remembers most everything you like and dislike. 4. Your INFP usually likes one of the following: Writing, drawing, music, etc. This is a way your INFP expresses themselves, and is a very important thing to them. There is a 40% chance that INFP will show you there art/writing/music choices one day. When/If they do, know that INFP finds you very special, as this is very uncommon and you have become the chosen one.

5. Your INFP is obsessed with something. No really, your INFP has something that it loves and expresses said love for it. Whether it is something as small as a fascination with rocks to a unhealthy love of rainbows. Please indulge this. INFP will show this feature the more you spend time with them. Pro Tip: If you get a gift for INFP that involves said obsession, you will become their favorite person ever and will likely keep with gift in a place and remember you every time they look at it. Plus they will likely never expect you to do this for them.

6. Your INFP is not good at confrontation. Your INFP DOES NOT like confrontation and will do anything to avoid it. They are diplomats and they keep true to the title. They try to make peace in bad situations and can often stop fights by being the nuetral go between. They are able to see both sides of the coin and will try their best to make everyone happy. Please avoid confrontation to spare INFPs becoming mentally exhausted/Upset/using every emotion they have and know of…

7. INFPs are VERY GOOD AT CONFRONTATION. (Yes we are aware of what was stated above in 6) While INFP does not like confrontation, when a friend of INFP has been wronged, it is as if something snapped in INFP and suddenly INFP will become bullet proof and will destroy its target. In plain terms, your Golden Retriever has now switched to full on Rottweiler guard dog mode. If you want this action not to be completed on your behalf, you must tell INFP before it annihilates the person that has wronged you. They have a very hurtful almost eerie way of completing this action and It is not pretty. Distract INFP with something shiny or its favorite thing to spare the person.

8. Your INFP in the embodiment of the word contradiction. (See 6 &7) Your INFP can be decisive and indecisive on the same day at basically the same time. One moment your INFP will be meek and mild like a lamb about one thing, and as vicious as a bear protecting it’s young about another. This is normal and in time will become less and less surprising.

Pro Tip: Don’t try to change this quality. It actually adds to INFPs quirkiness and overall personality. Plus their feelings WILL get hurt

9. Your INFP is very strong and can be very stubborn, but will cave if they love a person. Treat your INFP with care as their love for you will make them give in to doing most of what you want to make you happy. Consult with your INFP to be sure what you re doing/planning makes them happy too. More often than not it will, but they will appreciate the consideration and only love you more. (Be prepared for a 15-30 minutes conversation and possible tangents)

10. Your INFP needs to talk to you! Your INFP has a habit of keeping everything in. In their mind, the less they trouble you with their problems, somehow to them makes it better for everyone else. If left unchecked, INFP will slowly erode and self destruct and feel unlved and misunderstood. You must ask them how they are doing and spend one on one time with them often. It would be simple if asking how your INFP was was a simple as asking “how are you?” But it is NOT. You must sometimes be a little forceful. Show that you care.

Pro Tip: Invite INFP over for bonding time. Give them a warm cup of coffee/tea and a cozy place to sit. Be ready to listen. CAUTION! This will likely take from 2-8+ hours. Make a day for it!

These are the top 10 instructions for your new INFP friend! We would post more, but sadly the model INFP comes with 75 additional volumes each with 700+ pages per volume! But this is a good way to get started and get to knowing your new INFP!

Have fun with your new friend and Congratulations!

Aromanticism often goes hand-in-hand with:

Low self-esteem, self-loathing, and/or feelings of inferiority

Feeling lonely, isolated, or like you’re an “other”

Shame

Anxiety

Fear of abandonment, distrust of friends and family

Constant second-guessing one’s own identity

Fear of the future or an inability to imagine oneself with a “happy ending”

Disassociation in the form of feeling “unreal” or “inhuman”

This is a huge problem that can really destroy a person, and the root cause is the way our society treats relationships. But the thing is, nobody ever tries to address this problem. People outside of the aro community (which is small and disjointed as it is) don’t discuss aro issues, and don’t try to think critically about the messages they put out, and then when aros talk about how much they’re hurting, we just get told that we don’t have it as bad as other people, so we don’t have any right to complain, and our feelings aren’t real.

God knows it’s hard to heal yourself without help from others, and aros aren’t getting that help. And sure, sometimes we can talk to each other, but that can only get you so far- it’s the emotional equivalent of two people simultaneously trying to save each other from drowning. The aromantic community needs outside support, but nobody is trying to help us aside from saying that we’re Valid™ every now and then. That’s a big problem.

So uh….some dude apparently recreated Adobe Photoshop feature-for-feature, for FREE, and it runs in your browser.

Anyway, fuck Adobe, and enjoy!

I remember posts like this being helpful when I was questioning so I thought it might be good to make a checklist of sorts for The Aro Experience:

not picking up on your friend’s crushes

not understanding the appeal of kissing

thinking about your future and being excited to live alone/with friends rather than immediately thinking about marriage

being annoyed or grossed out by romance in the media

alternatively, seeing romance in the media as formulaic, saying things like ‘these two characters will kiss once then break up I can tell from the portrayal of their first interaction’ rather than getting emotionally invested.

choosing not to read/watch something because there is romance

not getting why people say they want a relationship if they don’t have a crush at the time

your ideal romantic relationship being suspiciously similar to your ideal friendship when you think about it

being able to explain your ‘type’ with fashion style, aka caring more about clothes than looks when considering if you find someone attractive

feeling like your views on relationships are more ‘childish’ than your friend’s views are

feeling uncomfortable when family or friends ask if you’re dating/like someone, even if their questions aren’t particularly invasive

assuming other people make up their crushes to fit in or seem cool 

making your own crushes to fit in, or just mindlessly agreeing that  people all your friends like are ‘hot’ even if you don’t think so

feeling out of place and like you can’t contribute when your friends talk about crushes and relationships

thinking people your age are way too young to date, and this view never seeming to change as you get older

This is mostly from personal experience and obviously every aro is different, but hopefully this is helpful.

Open letter to aromantic and aro-spec allies: On overuse of the word “valid”, and why it needs to stop

Aka look at me so bitter I’m actually engaging in community discussion and tagging things instead of just venting on my blog because I’m shy

Whenever I see aromantic or arospec positivity- which, frankly, is not very often- it almost always seems to come in one specific form: Telling us that we’re “valid”. That it’s ok that we don’t (or rarely, in the case of some arospec identities) experience romantic attraction, because we’re still Valid™.

I hate it. And many other aros do, too.

I’m sure most of you mean well, and simply don’t know any better, which is why I’m going to try to explain this as politely and clearly as possible. Please take a moment and listen, because god knows aro voices are so rarely listened to.

Weiterlesen

Welcome to the space age, ladies and gentlemen

FOB lyrics that feel incredibly arospec to me

so boycott love

love never wanted me but I took it anyway

this is a love song in my own way, happily ever after below the waist

its a strange way of saying I know I’m supposed to love you

I got your love letters, corrected the grammar and sent them back

it’s true romance is dead, I shot it in the chest and in the head

I thought I loved you, it was just how you looked in the light

Fave thing about Aromanticism?

Mine is the fact that aro is punk af. What’s your fave thing about our phenomenal community?