I feel the heat of the blade of my own hatred taking ever opportunity to bury itself into my brain.
Before you I was on a path so empty.
Without you I'm lost, a broken compass, taking on water in the storms I chose to sail.
You believe in me.
I take your hand.
I'll wound you. I'll hurt you. I'll make you have moments of doubt, and unneeded pain.
I can pretend it's obsessive behavior, my need for validation, my weak value in myself.
Ultimately I can't follow that wire the one that ends at my mouth, the puppet of my mind, I look deep to find the source to see where the wire originates... If I had my way, I'd rip that fucker so hard out of my body and pray I was the man I wish I was with you.
I can't.
All I can promise is every mile down our path, every word spoken between us, every moment you give me your time, that I'll spend it showing you my love, my respect, I'll cut you when you need it, I'll care for you after, I'll strive to put you first and try to get you to feel it every day I am allowed.
All I can promise is I'll try to wear out that connection, to pull and wiggle, to break the internal connection, to render that wire useless, or all least render it unable to control it, with the force it has.