Heartbeeps

Transylvania 6-5000

Are alien creatures using your body for sex while you sleep? No? Does that make you feel inferior and not attractive enough for them? I wouldn’t worry about it, that’s just a sensationalist headline from the tabloid paper that our intrepid heroes work at.

My original post: Transylvania 6-5000

From what I can surmise, Blake Thorne, aka Hulk Hogan with bad hair, made his money off of making other people feel like physical shit. Say your prayers, eat your vitamins…eat your heart out. At least in the form of Thorne, he’s more like eat my mass maker supplement. Despite knowing he’s got the build of a guy that can stop an ice cream truck dead in its tracks just by pulling on an attached rope, he’s never actually satisfied with his picture on his own products. I digress.

My original post: Santa with Muscles

Earth Girls Are Easy 1988 | dir. Julien Temple

Willow (1988) dir. Ron Howard

Zombeavers

ZOM…BEAVERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Somewhat sadly this is not as really a campy lesbian adult entertainment zombie parody. At times it’d probably help the movie, but we are left with a horror comedy that does manage to deliver on its own still.

My original post: Zombeavers

The Love Witch

Love me…love me…love me…love me…

That’s what Elaine, love witch, wants and I’ll see what I can do. I haven’t exactly taken any of her potions, that I know of, so I’ll have to settle on my usual fancy beer to get myself that liquid courage. Deity knows I’m not the smoothest person in town.

My original post: The Love Witch

Chopping Mall

Chopping Mall is what you get when you take horny teenagers and put them up against vigilante overweight R2-D2 triplets in either a great mall laser battle or the deadliest mall laser battle of all time.

My original post: Chopping Mall