This Is The Funniest Thing I’ve Ever Read In A Science Book

metroid is about isolation

but metroid is also about learning to do trick jumps from random animals who celebrate when you get it right, and about saving them even as the planet shudders under your feet

and metroid is about lowering your gun when you meet the last of a species who's only just hatched, and gently holding out your hand

and metroid is about accidentally calling the name of someone you care about, who you thought you'd lost, and finding out they've been with you the whole time

and about a little scribble of a child with their parents tucked into the corner of a grand mural

and about the gifts left behind by others because they may be gone before they get to meet you, but that won't stop them from helping you

metroid is about love actually

Wario

Wizard Tip #23: The “S” In Sorcerer Stands For Smoochable

Ain’t it funny? We find a way to finally, actually hurt eldritch monstrosities, and suddenly they’re all like “It was just a test” “It’s just a prank bro” “We were just testing you”. How convenient.

Sticky hand wall update

What if The Slayer didn't arrive in time to stop the ritual binding the heart of Mateo (Valen's son) to the Icon of Sin. But instead of the Icon wreaking havoc, it begins to claw at its own a face. Its roar sounding more like a wail. Mateo's soul is fighting for control, for all Argenta are born with the will to fight.

The Slayer's role becomes not to kill the Icon outright, but to land blows when the Baphomet's soul takes over. Giving Mateo the advantage.

When the battle is over, only Mateo remains. Proving his soul was more pure than Baphomet was corrupt. His will, with the Slayer's help, is greater than that of the Khan. Mateo uses the Icon's body and his newfound might to aide the Slayer in further trials...

And, eventually, reunites with his father.

There's a distinct image in my head of Valen standing before the massive head of the Icon. A hand resting on its muzzle as it rumbles; an earth shaking purr.

Oh my gosh I actually wrote a fanfic

Soooo instead of working on finals last night, I wrote a Mega Man fanfic where Roll tries to figure out if she’s gay! I’m really proud of this one, give it a read if you can!

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“What is this place?” “Please, have some tea.” “No, where am I!? What ARE you!?” “This is the last remnant of your sanity. You looked upon me, something incomprehensible, and it drove you mad. I’m merely trying to see you off politely.”