Where Every Scroll is a New Adventure
Lately, I've been having some weird ass dreams.
First, some context: From about 1st-2nd grade to 7th grade, I've been bullied, mostly by this one guy in particular, and his friend too. Not only have I developed trauma because of it, but I'm even paranoid about getting a job because seeing either of them in public scares me so much. (As I went to online school after 7th grade. I'm now a senior.) This anxiety and paranoia has prevented me from getting a job for the past few years. It did not help that in 2021, while working at the local haunted house, I was recognized by my bully despite my entire face being covered up. He insulted me and laughed at me, and harassed other workers on their way out. (I had to text up front to have a manager escort me out so I could take a breather. A different manager tried to go after them after hearing what they did to me and my coworkers, so now they're banned, anyway.)
But, as of the past two months, he keeps appearing in my dreams. If it was just regular bully stuff, I wouldn't be having an issue, as I easily recognize when I'm dreaming and don't get easily scared in dreams anymore. But, that is not the case. Instead, I've been dreaming of romantic situations with this guy, and it's... weird. I mean sure, I used to think I was crushing on him back in elementary school, but now? I'm terrified of this guy, I have literal PTSD because of him, so WHY am I having these dreams?
I genuinely am at a loss of what to think or do about this. I don't understand why I'm having these dreams, because I don't think even remotely positively about him. I'm scared of him, so how can I be dreaming of these situations? It honestly scares me, it makes me very frustrated. I just don't know what to do and it's worse when I don't even know why it's happening. So please, smart people with more braincells than me, does anyone have any clues as to why this could be happening??