Moods - Blog Posts

oh no!

i just realised, i listen to ez's playlists, ez is a big fan of skrillex, bangarang is a skrillex song, but is also a just dance, and eleven year old me was a just dancer... and i always did bangarang Xtreme, which was easier than the normal one, i am very impressed if you read the whole post, amazing work honestly, anyways, back to making my new playlist.

if you wanna listen to it heres the name: Mo0d$ by IFeelLikeTexty

Tbh I am an extremely chill person as long as certain things go exactly the way I need and expect them to every single day

what's the matter honey? you've hardly touched your fleeting experience of time on earth

"aroace people do not exist" thank god. i am so tired of existing in late stage capitalism. thank you for giving me freedom. i shall not work or study anymore. only freeload. only nap. only eat. only bath. only sleep. only meme. for eternity.

Sometimes a mood just hits you, like “I am a dirty sissy slut and I just need to be fucked by my perfect Mistress!” Ya know?

Dartrix moods

Inktober day 18 “bottle”

It took me a while to realize that I no longer hold a place in your world. I should have stopped trying to fit myself in, a long time back.

Life just turns upside down one day and you wonder what you did wrong. You realize that you had never anticipated this turn.

Everyday I mourn over the loss of people from my life. Everyday I wish I had a chance to talk, to tell you what you think is wrong. I wanna prove myself to you. I'm not what you think I am.

I miss being surronded by my people.

I miss people listening to all the crazy stuff I say.

now, neither are there people nor do I say stupid stuff.

I miss me.

And finally I realized that you don't have to be with people, surrounded by friends and family, to be you. Coz all you need is you.

I'll bounce back

I'll be fine

After a long time I'm giving a chance to hope.

Coz people, they leave, they stay at times too its upto them. If you mourn you'll just keep mourning.

The sooner you realize that your questions have no answers, you'll stop asking them.

I don't seek answers anymore. It's not people I rely on but rather me.

You stay, you leave, it's your choise. I'm gonna stay the same. I'll be fine.

Let's hope so. Well if you ask @glitteringhuman he'd say let's believe so.

I believe this time. I'll be back, it's just a matter of time.

I was never theirs

It took me a long time

To realize what had happened.

All this while I was blaming them

For the way I was.

It was me who made all the mistakes…

Mistake of trusting them,

Believing in them,

Thinking they were mine.

I thought I was loved less…

How wrong was I..

Coz’ I was never loved at all.

I thought they wanted good for me,

Alas, good was never present.

I thought a lot of things,

Perhaps how wrong was I…

My parents were never mine,

It was never their mistake

Coz’ I was the one who had mistaken

That I was theirs

But it turns out that

I was never theirs….

I am falling.

So, what do I do on my free days?

I wake up late, search for a cup of coffee,

Make myself a plate easy breakfast and then

It’s a day of selfcare.

I think of the books to read and shows to watch

I lay down on the grass and look at the sky.

I paint my nails and I curl my hair

Then bunch them and use a ribbon to tie.

Sometimes I look in the mirror and I can see

See a void but then it disappears

Then I think of having some tea

So, I put the pan up and sit on the chair

Waiting

Waiting

Waiting

The water boils over

I feel all drunk

Even when I am sober

I am sitting and sitting and sitting

I can see the sun rise and set and rise and set

The clock tics toks tics toks tics toks and tics

And I lie on my bed and lie to my self

The void in me is rising and burning and singing

The void is hungry so, its eating

Eating me and the soul and the light

Selfcare maybe is lying in bed

Feel a little dead

But I just stay and stay and stay

Then there is the night and then the day

And then something clicks

I thinks the void is full, it had its share

It is going back in and there is this light

This light, a crack on the wall

I find myself standing tall

I look at the clock oh its been just four hours

But then my cell phone beeps

‘hey there you’ve been missing from the outside world for a week’

My eyes readjust, my mouth is dry

I reach for water, there is a pan with burnt tea leaves

There is a cup of coffee half drunk

I look into the mirror, there is ribbon tangled in my hair

Well I guess this is the end of a day of selfcare

and believe me, I can feel it in the air

I am falling again.

I Am Falling Again.

I Am Falling Again.

So, what do I do on my free days?

I wake up late, search for a cup of coffee,

Make myself a plate easy breakfast and then

It’s a day of selfcare.

I think of the books to read and shows to watch

I lay down on the grass and look at the sky.

I paint my nails and I curl my hair

Then bunch them and use a ribbon to tie.

Sometimes I look in the mirror and I can see

See a void…

View On WordPress

My four moods

Show me your mood with a TK Strand gif

Me:

@ronenstrand @hopefulwonderlandrunaway

Welp.

I can officially add ‘accidentally smacked a kid because he startled me’ on my list of things that I have achieved.