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Ben And Jerrys Ice Cream - Blog Posts

1 year ago

I got bored few days ago and had this idea that the New states have a group chat sooooo heres the New state GC that no asked for :D

Chap one: Oops all the new kids

Chat- New Brethren

Newie: So remind me again why we aren’t eating at Jerz?

Yorkadam: He let Florida in his house

Nex Mex: yikes

New Mex: is jerry still alive?

Yorkadam: Considering he is looking over my shoulder, yes he is alive

Newie: Damn thought this woulda killed him

Yorkadam: He says “Fuck you”

Newie: 🖕

Nex Mex: wait why cant jerry just type on his fone?

Yorkadam: Also Florida

Newie: WAIT!!!

Newie: Did Florida blow up his kitchen AND his phone!!???

Yorkadam: Yep

Nex Mex: daaammmmnnn 

New Mex: doulbe homiecide

Yorkadam: “FUCK YOU!!”

Newie: Ooooo Jerz is angy

New Mex: hehe angy

Yorkadam: Be warned, Jerkae tele’d

Newie: Ah shittiobweiufhubewgowefub

New Mex: L

Newie: your next.

Newie is now offline

New Mex: hahaha look at this thing i suddenly gots ta do

Nex Mex is now offline

Yorkdam: God damn it Jerkae

4 hours later

Newie is now online

Newie: Jerz you are the worst you know that

Jerry™: oh I am absolutely aware

Newie: Absolute psychopath

Yorkadam: Your acting like we didn’t know this already

Newie: Fair point

Newie: Btw where is Nexico?

Newie: Figured he would have got on by now

Jerry™: I got em

Jerry™: turns out snow and a 80 degree state don mix so well

Newie: Jerz wtf?

Jerry™: listen at first it was light torture as pay back and then it turned into a bill nye the science guy ep

Jerry™: not my fault

Newie: How???

Yorkadam: I chose not to question that, it’s best you don’t as well

Yorkadam: That reminds me, you didn’t get hit too badly did ya?

Yorkadam: We could always get Masshole or Conny to look at it

Newie: Nahh don’t worry

Newie: It’s just bruised but I’m pretty confident its not broken

Jerry™: ah shit I didnt hurt ya loads did I?

Jerry™: you can pop down to my room if ya want

Jerry™: I got south park running and ice/heat packs

Yorkadam: Oh great, worried Jerkae is out

Newie: Shh shh Yorkie

Newie: I want love

Newie: I’ll be right there

Yorkadam: Sigh, I’ll bring pizza

Jerry™: that pizza better be from one of my places or so help me god

Yorkadam: As per usual, I’m getting pizza from my place and ya can’t stop me

Jerry™: I ll starve danke

Newie: Oh for Treeza’s sake just get pizza from Dominoes

Yorkadam: Oh hell no

Jerry™: if you ever suggest that again Im going to kill you zero hesitation

Newie: Damn okay fine

Newie: Just didn’t want yous to murder each other over food again was all

Jerry™: its my room so its my pizza ur gettin

Yorkadam: I’m the won getting the food dipshit, so I get to pick

Newie: Wait isn’t it technically Nexicos room?

Newie: Since it was assigned to him before yous two switched?

Jerry™: ……

Yorkadam: …So I’ll just grab Papa Johns?

Jerry™: yeah…papa j works

Yorkadam: Cool cool, be there in ten

Yorkadam is now offline

Newie: Wait so all I have to do to get yous to stop fighting is just mention that it wasn’t your room first?

Newie: Wicked!!

Jerry™: Fuck you and fuck off.


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8 years ago

This is the greatest thing I've ever seen in my life

I have never seen grape ice cream.


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11 months ago

War on humanity in an ice cream franchise shop

Cloudy day, windy

Your boss' makin a loss

But I told you I'd never eaten this kind of ice cream before

And now I'm back for a second helping

First day it was sunny and I was in a good mood

Today I got no such excuse

The word "smile" is overused by corporate and music that's gentrification misspelled

So I'll commit the greatest rebellion of the industry:

You just looked at me.

Desperate claws in a sunny smile I've trained to be a good customer to the service

I ask you if I should take a cup or cone, your opinion

Well, it's my choice

But you can give me a little more in a cup.

I laugh too loud. Answer too loud. You're making money, I'm spending money.

'i hope to see you again, miss.'

That's not part of the script.

They don't say miss here.


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