Aphantasia - Blog Posts

As someone with both visual snow and aphantasia. I kind of wonder if one might have an affect on the other.

Sometimes I'm able to "see" some things? but I can't control when that is. usually if I'm dreaming/day dreaming i get a hint. But i'm a very very Visual person. my memory is very visual, my creative process is very visual, my imagination is very visual. but i can't actually see shit in my mind.

so i'm wondering if maybe the little i do get to "see" could be to do with the visual snow? seeing patterns and shapes in that? they're both very interesting parts of my vision so i was wondering if there was any overlap between them in my experience.

idk i'd love to here if anyone else is in the same shoes! It's so cool that both of these things are being talked about more and we can learn from eachother!

Me listening to the same song on repeat so I can perfect every frame of an animation I’ll never make-

except for two “frames.” that’s all you get.

This is just me complaining about aphantasia.

I tried drawing without reference yesterday night and it was such a terrible experience that I nearly cried myself to sleep afterwards /hj. No but seriously though, I was really restless after that and I just lay in bed, feeling upset and cheated.

No matter how many figure sketches or studies I do, I'll never truly be able to draw without a reference. It's just so demotivating. I don't enjoy art at all, I just keep on practicing in the hope that I'll get better, but it's just not fun for me. I'm not going to quit art because it would waste all the time I've invested in this hobby, but I don't think I'll ever enjoy it.

It kind of irks me when people act like your aptitude in art has nothing to do with talent, because your ability to visualise can make such a huge difference 😭I hope no one interprets this as me invalidating the work that artists put in because that's not what I'm trying to say. I'm just kind of salty that all of those figure sketches and studies I've done have had no effect on my art ability whatsoever. The whole concept of having a visual library made no sense to me for a very long time, and it's only recently that I've realised that's because I never had one in the first place.

When I first found out that I had aphantasia, I didn't think much of it. But I'm beginning to realise how much I'm missing out on. It feels really condescending when people say stuff like "I can't imagine what it's like to not be able to imagine a scene while reading a book" but I guess they're right. Maybe that's why I prefer to read about interactions between characters and internal monologue, and just skim past descriptions of the environment.

Drawing as Visualization

I’ve been writing up this series on energy work w/ aphantasia and I wanted to touch on another technique I’ve heard about- drawing your energy and using that picture to focus your intent. The key here, I think, is to really use the tools around you. Select your paper/pens/markers with intent and focus on using them. You are drawing, yes, but you’re also harnessing energy. 🛡️Draw a picture of yourself using a pen/pencil. This might be as elaborate as a self portrait, or as simple as a stick figure. Make sure it’s full body and that you feel like it represents yourself. Now, with a marker or highlighter, draw a shield around yourself. I prefer a bubble that incircles my whole body, but draw whatever works for you as long as it has no cracks or holes. As you draw your shield, focus on it and imagine that this shield is protecting your physical form as well as the drawing’s form. Let it become real through your artistry. 🌌Astral travel can be assisted by drawing as well. Draw a door that you want to enter before you astral travel to be able to find it easier. I also have had a lot of fun drawing my own Astral space to enforce my ability to visit it! After visiting, try drawing an entity or a place you encountered to strengthen your memory of it. 🔋Need to charge something? Grab your chargless item, put it on a sheet of paper. Draw arrows from a sunlight source, yourself, or another energy source towards your item that needs charging. You could even use colors to represent different intents flowing into your item. 🖊️Bonus tip: If you find that drawing as energy work really works for you, try enhancing your paper and pens with sigils. If yall ever have any questions or things you want me to write about regarding energy work and visualization w/ aphantasia, send me a message!

Visualizing without Visuals - low visualization/aphantasia energy work

You’re already aware that you can’t visualize things in your head. Either that or it’s very hard for you. I feel you. I’m right there with you. Because of this I’ve been unable to understand energy work for the longest time. So I thought I’d try to go into some other ways we “imagine” things in our minds eye if we have no concept of visuals in our heads. These are just ideas to get you started and to hopefully come up with some methods of imagining that work for you. ✋Touch: Think about what your energy work feels like. Does it flow? Drip? Does it feel like smoke or liquid or a solid? Does your energy feel hot or cool? Or is it warm and fuzzy? Does it feel like floating in the ocean with the cold waves around you and the hot sun beating down on your skin? What about a waterfall, icey cold and beating down upon your head and shoulders? How about a warm fuzzy blanket, wrapped around your whole body so you’re nice and comfy?

👃Smell: Do you remember smells really well? If so, think about what your energy work could smell like, and how that scent moves. Does it smell like mint or sage or peppermint? Or maybe rose or lavender? Does it smell like falling rainwater or the beach? A forest perhaps? Or maybe it just smells like your old grandpap. Does the scent waft across your being or does it hang in the air like a permanent, but welcome stench? 👂Hear: Does your energy have a sound? Could it sound like the warm crackling of a fireplace? Rain beating down and hitting the leaves of a tree before dripping onto the earth? Maybe your energy sounds like an earthquake or a blizzard. Maybe it sounds like quiet laughter after hearing your favorite joke. Does the sound pass over you in waves, is it quiet and soft, or is it loud and booming? 👄Taste: What, if anything, could your energy taste like? Salty like the ocean? Minty and fresh? Maybe it tastes like your favorite meal, maybe oatmeal or meatloaf or apple pie. Is the taste bitter? Sweet? Pungent? Does it have an aftertaste? Is it spicy or is it mild? Does it linger in your mouth through your body or does the taste pass through easily? 🙏 Hopefully this helps give you any ideas, I’m always open for input! 🙏

Magick for the Blind and Aphantasic

Aphantasia:

When an individual is unable to produce mental images.

Aphantasics conceive of ideas, stories, and other thoughts in a non- or sub-visual way.

When the average person is told to imagine a chair, they “see” a chair in their mind’s eye. Also known as visualization.

Aphantasics are incapable of doing this.

This is not a disorder, merely a variation in cognition. It also exists on a spectrum.

Blindness:

Those who have been blind from birth typically do not perceive of their world in a visual way.

There is at least one notable exception.

Because of this, most people who have been blind their whole lives are also incapable of visualizing.

Magick and meditation often reference visualizations as a starting point. Therein lies the problem.

As someone who is rather close to the aphantasic end of the cognition spectrum, this has been quite frustrating and significantly impeded my own spiritual growth.

But I believe my fellow aphantasic magick practitioners along with blind magick practitioners can still do powerful things even without the power of visualization.

Here is what I’ve learned so far:

Throw out the word visualization. Throw it out forever. If you’re like me, it’s not for you.

Substitute your own cognitive process. In my case, I have a strong sense of spatial/mechanical thought. Do what works for you.

Trust your intuition. You know what you need to do. Just relax.

Accept your gift. You can conceive of the world in a way many people can’t. Your magick is so so So important. Because you’ll catch what others might miss.

I hope this is helpful for someone out there. I know I can’t be the only borderline aphantasic witch.

Alright, a memory just popped up.

Back in elementry school we were listening to our teacher reading a story. We would be hunched over the desk, arms crossed, head on top with closed eyes. I was going insane to not have a picture of the scenes in my head - all I saw was absolutly nothing.

Years later I found out I had Aphantasia. Now these memories and feelings make more sense.

aphantasia

omg. omfg. i’ve recently learned that i have aphantasia. WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME THAT YOU CAN DEADASS SEE THINGS IN YOUR FCKIN MIND??!?!?! can someone please explain to me how it works otherwise?

Wrong person to ask here, I'm pretty sure I have aphantasia, also related to smell. So idfk and I'll never be able to know.

Like, I can image the concept of a smell or the concept of the looks of a person but I can't image them fully. It's just a blurr of grey (even in smell and hearing, don't ask it's weird)

If you'd ask me to image Tom the only thing I would be able to see is approximately this

And don't get me started on faces cause it gets even worse with that. I can't even see the shapes of anything. It's just blank. Grey. And not even amythist-sky grey :c

what kind of scent do you guys think tom has? i personally can't imagine him wearing cologne for some reason (which is a bit silly). he probably has some slightly sweet, very pleasant natural scent that is hard to describe. maybe laundry detergent or lemongrass