Masterlist

SHNANKS

Is this a request to do something for him or just a plea to the gods 😭

If you want something to laugh/get mad over there are somehow trumpies in this comment section getting mad at their own lies they made up. Straight up denial not even joking. Like some of these gotta be ragebait

Trump voters on tiktok are EXTREMELY mad about the following:

They just found out what tariffs are

They just found out what denaturalization is

They (particularly black and Hispanic trump voters) just found out that other trump voters are racist

Leftists and liberals don't want to be their friends (they are furious about this)

Leftists keep telling them they hope they get what they voted for (they are really mad about this too)

Liking posts about ace (one piece) and then going on my for you tab and seeing countless posts about ace (asexuality) and not knowing what to do because the asexual posts are joking about me. Its like going on tiktok and seeing a video about cringe anime watchers and being said cringe anime watcher just because the vid was tagged anime.

Bro's struggling to get signal on the Sunny 😭😭😭

when i used to write cod fanfic on ao3 i got comments like this often. Someone told me that they want to eat my fingers to gain my writing skills

Normalize leaving unhinged comments on ao3 fics you like. I'm tired of being the only one brave enough to write "I am chewing on this fic" in the comment section. Be weird. Authors will love you for it

Just for you @who-can-touch-my-boob

GPD MPLEASEE PELASEEE

HIS HAIRCUT VHJJTSYDUFJF

His head looks both tall and short

Idea popped into my mind, though i've had it in my mind for a while now. Inspired by this one video i saw a while back (can't find it now) of some person who did the same thing to their cats. If i find it later ill quote this with it. Also comment if you want someone else with this. @mere-mortifer this is just a scenario thing but idk if it counts tell me if it doesnt and you just meant one shots.

Thunk

Various x GN!reader. Platonic. Luffy, Zoro, Sanji, Robin, Brook.

Luffy

“Did you have to spill it? Haven’t you gotten instincts for that?” You say, peeved as you clean up Luffy’s spilled juice.

“I don’t have that on all the time.” He says with a huff, begrudgingly grabbing more paper towels for you until he realizes something. “There’s no more.” It’s run out.

“No more?” You look back at him and see the empty paper towel roll, sighing. “Give it here.” He hands it to you and you bonk it on his head softly with a “thunk”.

“Hey!” He rubs the spot you did it, putting on his straw hat for protection.

“Small punishment, we’ll have to do it with a cloth so go get that for me; even if it’ll be a hassle to have to rinse it out.” Luffy pouts, but gets it anyway since he’ll be scolded if he doesn’t.

Zoro

You’re cleaning up Zoro’s workout equipment, he could do it himself but you’re doing it this time since he’s eating a sandwich Sanji made for protein. “You don’t clean these as often as you should.” You tell him while cleaning up the pole for weights.

“I’m the one who uses it the most anyway, if you think it’s gross just don’t use them.” The swordsman says in between bites. You notice you’ve managed to clean them with the last paper towel, pleased but still annoyed at what Zoro said. You walk over to him where he’s sitting and bonk his head with the empty roll. It makes a “thunk” sound. “Empty head.” He scowls.

“I didn’t ask you to do this.” You thunk him again. “Hey!” Thunk "Ugh."

“It’s not that much of a hassle to clean it, think of it as practicing your patience or responsibility. There’s other types of responsibilities that aren’t protection or fighting.”

“Whatever.” He mumbles and you thunk him on the head for the 4th time. “Stop!”

Sanji

“You should really take more breaks.” You say while rinsing out a cloth you were using to clean.

“I’m used to working this much from the Baratie, you have nothing to worry about.” He sits at the counter after you barely convinced him to atleast sit down for a bit.

“You only get 5 hours of sleep each night, that isn’t healthy for you even if you’re used to it.” He’s about to say something when you interrupt him. “Zoro sleeps less during the night but he naps during the day as well, Brook is a skeleton, and Luffy sleeps whenever he wants during the day as well if he’s tired. You do not.” The cook closes his mouth having been corrected. You grab a paper towel to dry off the counter and realize it’s the last one. You walk over to Sanji, who’s looking down at the ground, and bonk him on the head using the empty roll with a “thunk” sound. “I don’t mind you asking me for help if you need it, so use that assistance to rest a bit. I mean it.”

“...Okay..” He mumbles, his gaze still to the ground as he fumbles with his hands like a scolded little kid.

Robin

“I’m usually more careful than this.” Robin says while she makes sure none of the books have gotten wet. “I suppose I was too focused on the text.”

“If it means it was interesting enough then I’m sure the author would be flattered.” You say while cleaning up a drink she had knocked over while reading. Once she’s made sure nothing got wet she puts the books down on her lap. “There’s no point feeling bad about it now.” You manage to clean everything up by the time the paper towels have run out.

“I apologize for making you do this, you seemed focused as wel-” You lightly bonk her on the head with the empty roll, making a “thunk” sound. Her eyes widen as she looks up at you, shocked.

“Lighten up, you’re acting like you’ve forced me. Of course I would do this for you, you’re my friend.” Her eyes are still wide but she eventually smiles.

“Then I’ll thank you instead. Thank you.” You smile back at her when she thanks you.

“You’re welcome.” You bonked the bad thoughts out of her.

Brook

“If I could see your pantie-” Brook gets hit on the head HARD by Nami before she storms off, walking past you as you notice Brook now sitting on the ground rubbing his forehead.

“Hit again? You really don’t learn your lesson, huh?” You say while standing in front of him. “It was hard this time too, I heard it from where I was.”

“She knocked my brains out! Not that I had any to begin with yohoho!” He jokes, though he never really expects Nami to show her panties. It’s more of a habit at this point, something he gained from the past he’s reluctant to let go of.

“More like scrambled since you can still joke.” You’re holding an empty paper towel roll, on the way to throw it out before you heard the commotion. You get an idea and thunk him on the head with it, “To unscramble,” then do it again. “now to bonk those thoughts out.” He looks up at you, presumably processing what happened since you can’t really see an expression. He rubs his head for a second.

“You’ve warmed my heart (Y/n)-san, not that I have one!” His laugh is slightly less loud. “You’re a miracle worker…” He’s silent for a bit, then goes back to normal. “We should see panties to celebra-” Thunk.

Is This Love?

Luffy x male reader. Angst(?) Slowburn still. 1703 words Part one, Part three, Part four

Desc: You confessed to Luffy and he tries to find out what it means to him.

You’ve started sleeping in the men’s quarter’s again. It was hard to get some sleep at first, but life at sea is tiring, especially with the occasional marine attack and random weather conditions. Your body will shut itself down eventually. Unfortunately, someone else isn’t having much luck tonight.

“Hnnnnnnnn..”

Rustle

“Hrrrmmmmmmm”

Rustle rustle

“Hnnnnngaahh!” Luffy sits up quickly, his arms in the air. “Can’t sleep.” A shoe is thrown at his head by Sanji. “Ow!”

“Then go outside instead of bringing us into it!” The chef barks while the rubber man rubs his head. He pouts while getting up, making his way out onto the deck.

“waaatchhhh… night watchh.. heheheh. As if I even need to. Who would even dare approach the ship of the GREAT Captain Us-”

“Usopp.” The sniper feels a hand on his shoulder.

“EEAAAAAAHHH!” He screams and bursts into tears, ready to plead for his life before realizing it’s just his friend. “Oh. Luffy.” He has a hand on his chest, quickly pretending nothing happened. “Why are you up?”

“Wh- What happened!? Did you scream!?” A large muscular human reindeer runs over. “Luffy?” Fwoosh, back to small.

“I scared a bird, that’s all. I already took care of it.” The captain tries to open his mouth but is quickly shushed by Usopp. “You couldn’t sleep, right? Why?”

“(Y/n) sleeps back in his bed now but he still doesn't talk like before.” Changing the subject works, why wouldn’t it.

“Like before?” The two crewmates ask.

“Yeah like, he doesn’t.. look at me, the same. Like it’s… different. Not as warm.” He wracks his brain to explain, making weird hand signals because he can’t translate his thoughts into words he knows properly.

“Loving? Caring? Like you’re the only thing that matters in this unforgiving world?” Usopp finishes and Luffy nods, similar enough. He hums while nodding, eyes closed with a hand on his chin.

“Seems like he fell out of love with you.” The sniper states after a bit of fake pondering for dramatic effect.

“Out of love?” Chopper and Luffy ask before Usopp nods.

“I mean, you rejected him, right? Even outed his feelings in front of all of us, sounds like he just moved on. Let the feelings fade out into the wind.” He explains while the doctor nods. Luffy’s brain goes empty-er as he lets how he feels translate into thoughts,

“I didn’t reject him” and out through his mouth. The two previously chatting teens stop.

“You didn’t?” They ask and Luffy shakes his head.

“I just called him weird, then he didn’t say anything else.”

…

Is that not a rejection?

“Is that not a rejection?” That’s what I said. Usopp furrows his brows, trying to see through his friend’s eyes. “Did you also stay silent?”

“I didn’t know what else to say.” The sniper hums, he would definitely start ugly sobbing if someone he was in love with did that to him.

“You could’ve said, ‘Thank you for your feelings, I do not feel the same way.’ If he continues then scold him.” Chopper says with a hoof on his chest. Very kind. “Or kick him off a mountain.” Two different parents taught him two different things.

“That could kill someone..” Usopp points out, slightly concerned. Chopper nods.

“If they survive they ask for your help and then you have a new customer/patient.” What did Dr. Kureha teach him? The long nosed man stares at Chopper in concern and shock before Luffy speaks.

“I don’t wanna do that.”

“Well yeah he’s still our friend, kicking him off a mountain is a bit mu-”

“I mean, I don’t wanna lie.” He clarifies and Usopp stares at his friend, lips jutted out still from being interrupted.

“Lie?” The small reindeer asks instead and the captain nods.

“I do have feelings for him. I just.” Luffy motions at his chest, “Just…” This is why he couldn’t sleep. “I don’t know what love like that is. Being in love. He’s in love with me and I love him but I don’t know what my love is if he feels like that.” Luffy feels platonic love easily, he feels joy and happy and angry all very easily. Even something like excitement from a woman’s chest he can feel via living through Usopp, but romantic love he doesn’t know a lick about feeling. Passion and smooching, hugging and holding hands, staring into each other's eyes. You could do that all with a friend, mostly, so what’s the actual difference? It’s not like lust is the difference either since people do stuff without loving each other all the time.

“Romantic love…” Hiriluk loved Drum Island and Dr. Kureha loved having fun. “Romantic love is having big antlers and sturdy fur.” Chopper reverts to what he learned when he was a wee baby. Luffy rubs his own head, no antlers. In response to his captain’s confusion, Usopp speaks confidently.

“It’s okay. They call me Captain of Love Usopp for a reason!” He strikes a pose and Chopper claps. “Love is like the warm sun on a snowy day, a ray of light peeking through storm clouds, an oasis in a desert. It’s the light at the end of a tunnel.” A lot of metaphors, but not a lot of actual explanation. It’s not doing much good, though Chopper at least seems into it. The rubber man isn’t as interested though, realizing this isn’t answering much of his questions. He looks down.

“I don’t want (Y/n) to be out of love with me if he’s like this because he doesn’t love me romantically anymore.” Luffy mumbles to himself, deciding to go to the restroom. Maybe that’ll help.

“Amorrr is- Luffy? Where’d he go?” Usopp looks around, realizing he’s gone. He looks down at Chopper, who’s expecting more. The sniper clears his throat and continues. “Love is like!” You get the point. Chopper doesn’t know about romantic love much, even as a reindeer. They don’t usually love romantically to mate, while both Hiriluk and Dr. Kureha were interested in their medical endeavors and danger. As for Usopp, he’d been on the same island all of his life always focusing on other things to ever truly register romantic love. His sick mother, her death, then trying to become a brave warrior of the sea. No parents to teach him either. His assumption was it would be figured out once on the ocean, being surrounded by lovers and admirers all the time. Neither of them can help Luffy, at least not in the way he needs.

So what does Luffy need? He doesn’t know, and neither do they. So he goes to the restroom.

“Love…” Luffy says while sitting on the toilet, not going or anything, just for thinking. “Loovvee. Loav.” Repeating it isn’t helping, “Louuvee, loaf.” though it is cheering him up. “Shi shi shi!” He laughs a bit, then stands up. This didn’t give any answers, but he won’t stress about it. Things will work out eventually. Luffy splashes water and soap on his hands, dries them off, then leaves the restroom. He goes back to the men’s quarters. Before going back to his own bed he stops by yours. “...” He crouches down and stares at you. “..luv.” A small mumble before flopping onto his mattress. His heart and mind feels clearer.

Meanwhile, your eyes open, what was that about?

_____________________

‘Why’d he just stare at me? Or maybe he wasn’t? My eyes weren’t open but I definitely felt his body heat and breath.’ You think to yourself as you poke at your food with a scowl, finally taking a bite out of it.

“Luffy’s gonna steal it if you don’t eat in time.” Nami tells you, pointing to your plate with her fork. On cue, the captain tries to reach for her food, hand smacked away before he could grab anything. No time for thinking during breakfast, but you’re on dish duty today. That should give you a chance to think.

“Hey.” A voice says behind you and you almost drop the plate you’re rinsing off. It’s Sanji. “So… about you and Luffy.” He starts, looking awkward. “You’re really in love with that id- with him?” He’d like to insult Luffy but feels it’s not the time.

“Way to bring it up again.” You grumble, placing the last dish to dry.

“Did he reject you?”

“Yeah, obviously. Don’t know what I expected to happen.” You don’t really feel like talking about it but he’s asking so you answer.

“Are you sure?” The chef asks and you look back at him, irritated.

“Hell you mean ‘are you sure?’ I’m pretty sure, dude.” Your eyes glare at him. “He called me weird and acts like I’m a specimen now.” Your sass makes Sanji frown back.

“I’m trying to help you, dumbass. Luffy’s not like other people. What you think might be a rejection can be something else entirely. He could say someone has a strong smell and consider it a compliment.” He lights a cigarette, annoyed at the attitude. “You could’ve read him wrong.” It’s a bittersweet thought that you just misunderstood.

“Even if I did misunderstand, so what? It’ll still mean a rejection, just in his own way.” You’re too stressed to talk about this. You were already trying to move on.

“He asked me about love yesterday.” Your eyes widen. “Usopp and Chopper said the same thing happened the day before.” Sanji says after taking a breath of his cigarette, blowing the smoke out the window. “That’s what I mean, but if you’re going to be a dick about it-” He leans into your face “-I don’t have to tell you anything.” He says mockingly.

‘Asshole.’ Though you were mean first, technically. Still, you really want to know the details. You clench your jaw, then speak. “I’m sorry for being an ass, tell me.”

“Huh? What’d you say? Tell you what?” He puts a cupped hand to his ear.

“Tell me more about what Luffy asked you.” He continues to stare at you until you sigh. “Please.” That gets a satisfied smirk out of him.

“Should’ve just said so.” You hold in your anger so he can continue. “What Luffy asked me…”

Cliffhanger wooaaaAAOoah. But still, theres another chappa. I already had a good portion of this one finished but the next one will prob take longer. Also my bad if this one was more comedic than you would like, all of my stuff ends up having a moment like that, plus moments with Usopp always tend to be unserious. I thought about not posting this immediately after it was done to space stuff out but.. nah. Not my style ig. Comment if you want, idk. Havent done slow burn in a long and by a while i mean years and also only like 2 or 3 times.

Next

A romantic date with Luffy and Shanks for @silverinkbottle. Gender neutral reader.

Luffy

I can’t really imagine Luffy as a romantic, but I’ll do what he thinks of as a nice date.

Food has to be involved, obviously, but I feel like he would like to be outside.

He would get Sanji to pack you both food for a picnic, then when you next dock at an island you both could find a nice sunny spot to rest; then just talk.

He would eat with you, almost forgetting but making sure you get a good share of the food.

If you’ve been dating for a long while he might even slow down his eating, just so you both could eat together.

Luffy doesn’t mind talking for the both of you, but he loves it when you respond; if that means he has to wait for you to finish eating then he’ll try to take his time.

Once you both are finished then you’ll continue to talk, maybe lay there for a bit, then off you go to look around again.

He isn’t really one for staying in the same place for too long if there isn’t something immediately interesting going on, so he would rather go find interesting things to do with you.

If you get tired he might be a bit bothered at first but then he gets the idea of “Oh I get to just carry them!” then picks you up and just trots around with you.

You both explore whatever nature is around, then end the day going back to any town to find something more to eat.

He talks with his mouth full sometimes but you’ve learned to kind of translate.

At the end of the day you two go back to the ship and fall asleep together, Luffy’s arms wrapped around you instinctively.

Shanks

Shanks’s idea of a romantic date depends on how long you’ve been dating.

If he plans on just having you for an island like usual, he’ll tell you that obviously, but he’ll take you out to something fancy.

A nice date at a nice restaurant, flirting and calling you pretty/handsome, then ending it with a steamy night in your bed.

If he’s serious about you, though, it’s similar but also different.

What a romantic date to him is just spending time with you wherever you like.

If you’re at a fancy dinner he’ll be more carefree, less flirting and more actual loving compliments.

He’d watch you eat, enjoying the way your face lights up when you like the food.

When that’s over he’ll walk around with you, exploring the island a bit while holding your hand.

If you two are at an island that isn’t his territory he might be more secretive.

He knows he’s popular and the last thing he wants is for his attention to have to be anywhere but you.

Whether it be from fans or marines, if he’s in his territory he could at least tell them to go away.

I imagine if he ever encounters fans that won’t go away he’d pull something cheesy like picking you up and saying “Sorry, with my lover, gotta go.” with a wink and bring you to a nice clearing.

He’d end the day with you in his bed, holding you tight with a kiss.

It doesn’t matter if you want to do it or not, he’s always happy as long as you’re with him.