POISSON STEVE?!

In case you were wondering why Spotify Wrapped sucks balls this year, and more importantly doesn't have any genre data:

Can you hear the sound of bells? That's because they're clowns. 🤡 🛎

Mammon: oi human! What's your ideal type?

Mc: Strong and Tough

Mammon: Once I killed ten mosquitos-

Mc: But also who are sensitive

Mammon: -and after killing them, I cried for an hour.

It's my favourite kind of fun actually GET BOOPED

Holy sheesh 😭

(this is fun ngl)

Have u considered letting it lick your eyelids

cats get so personally offended that I don't want my eyelids rubbed with sandpaper

i bought pre-cum strawberries today at the store and they were like twice as expensive but theyre so fucking good theres not any bad ones in the bowl and i dont have to waste time doing it myself now. so worth it

never been about me

Maybe yours doesn't

A whip made from a human spine

What the hell is this chat name lmaooo

The year is 2364, social media platforms of all kinds rose and fell like empires. Only tumblr is still running, a reminder of times long gone. The number one trending topic: Destiel.

Actually my favorite replacement for both 'kill myself' jokes and jokes about reacting violently to things/people that upset me is "I'm going to end up on the news" like it's versatile, it's vague, it's not going to get me in trouble with any censors or websites that take joke threats seriously, it's family friendly while still getting the point across, what's not to love???