Makingsenseofwhathappened - Makingsenseofwhathappened

“I'ma keep running 'cause a winner don't quit on themselves.”

Given a choice between accepting that something awful has happened, or thinking that someone is mistaken, exaggerating, or lying, much of the time our brains will deny the awful thing happened.

“You don’t have a right to the cards you believe you should have been dealt. You have an obligation to play the hell out of the ones you’re holding.”

You don’t have to be perfect to be harmed.

Maybe you’d had a drink. Maybe you laughed along. Maybe you told them they were cute once. Maybe you texted back. Maybe you said yes to one thing, but not to what happened next.

Maybe you tried to be polite when you should have run. Maybe you didn’t run because you were scared. Or tired. Or frozen.

None of that means it wasn’t harassment. None of that means it was your fault.

Being sexually harassed is less like you were running and tripped, and more like someone pushed you. Replaying everything you did or didn’t do doesn’t actually help you to prevent it from happening again.

ᴇᴅɪᴇ sᴇᴅɢᴡɪᴄᴋ, ᴀɴᴅʏ ᴡᴀʀʜᴏʟ ᴀɴᴅ ᴄʜᴜᴄᴋ ᴡᴇɪɴ NYC, 1965, by Burt Glinn.

“Ignoring isn’t the same as ignorance, you have to work at it.” Margaret Atwood, The Handmaid’s Tale

The performance review said you were “pleasant under pressure.” You thought about telling them it was acting. But why ruin a standing ovation?

The Cost of Staying

Sometimes it’s not that you didn’t want the job.

It’s that you wanted it too much.

You worked too hard. Put up with too much. Got good at things you never thought you’d be good at. Found your rhythm. Found your people. Maybe even started to believe you belonged there.

And then it changed.

Or maybe it didn’t. Maybe it was always like this and you just finally let yourself admit that the cost was too high.

That staying meant watching someone else get away with it. That staying meant shrinking a little bit each day. That staying meant carrying your own silence like it was professionalism. Like it was maturity. Like it was strength.

But here’s the truth no one wants to put on a poster: Sometimes leaving is the only way to protect yourself.

And that doesn’t mean you failed. It doesn’t mean you weren’t strong enough. It means the place wasn’t safe enough.

And maybe that’s not the ending you deserved, but it’s not the end of your story either.