I Mourn The Loss Of Trc Tv Like A Limb. But Like A Rotting Gangrene Limb. Im Better Off W/o It But Well

happy what fresh hell is this wednesday!

they hate me at the bike repair shop due to the fact i am always trying to break the cycle

i don't "date" and i don't "chill" and i don't "hang out." i make pacts. i swear oaths. i forge unbreakable bonds. this makes me a cool breezy person to take on road trips et cetera

yeah fuck it i'm making this its own post. basically very long winded (but still not as extensively detailed as i'd like) thoughts on adam & ronan (sort of) & whelk & noah

i remember reading the raven boys back in 2014 (ten years of rot in my brain!) and being sooo disappointed that there was basically zero fandom interest in whelk & noah beyond "omg whelk is evil and awful and terrible, poor baby noah!" when that is not the narrative surrounding them, not really. i feel it's a disservice to both of their characters to do that, especially noah's:

there is nuance there. there are implications. like... it's ALL about the implications!!! we basically see nothing of whelk and noah beyond what's left after the carnage. and it's a theme in trc for characters to have irreparably changed before we ever meet them (gansey, ronan, whelk, noah). we don't know what they were actually like when noah was alive, when they were best friends. when they were tight as ticks. whelk was noah's gansey. what we do know is this: whelk was cheating on his own girlfriend with noah's, which is a shitty thing to do for sure, but we have zero context for that. we also don't know how true it is, because whelk has such a self-inflicted warped view of his past. he keeps rewriting his own memories to think lesser of noah, because his absence hurts that much! we know they were best friends, the same way adam & ronan are best friends with gansey. we know they did everything together.

i'll paste the part where adam is possessed, sorry for the amount of screenshots:

and this line from a bit further along the chapter:

then, from noah's possession scene:

compare this to whelk's recollection of killing noah, and the effects it had on him:

"red lines streaked in the corners of his vision" "in whelk's head, unearthly voices hissed and whispered, words blurred and stretched together" "dictated by something larger and more powerful than himself" "somehow invited into his body through czerny's death" yes i am going there, yes i am making that point. i think, to some extent, barrington was possessed when he murdered his best friend. neither noah nor adam get their own pov while possessed, so...

i mean, time is a circle. noah needed to die so that gansey would live. noah had already died, gansey had already lived. it needed to happen, and so it would.

where the difference lies, i think, is in barrington's reaction to being possessed, versus adam/noah. for all that i'm arguing possession, i don't think barry's a stand up guy, he's a kid who's never had good role models (need i pull out the quotes about his shit parents) and who was raised by money and objects and reputation, which is why i think the possession worked. the idea to kill noah might've seemed like his own in the moment, an escalation of the situation he was already in, but unlike adam there was no one to hold him back. in that moment, whelk did truly lost it. he did the unforgivable. but there is no universe in which he doesn't.

for every time we see noah reenacting his death, we also need to imagine barrington whelk, seventeen and shivering. realizing as he's committing the act that he can't go back. perhaps realizing too that he couldn't stop his hands from gripping onto that skateboard, no matter how much he wanted to after that first hit. ("[...] something about the atmosphere immediately took him back to that moment, the skateboard in his hand, the sad question gasped in Czerny’s dying sounds.")

there's also adam in this. both him as a parallel to barrington, and as a strange sort of part of noah in a way. adam and noah interact the least out of the main group, arguably, but they too are a two-headed creature; they started out as one singular character and you can sort of tell. something something hands and eyes, something something sacrifice. ronan sort of parallels noah, in that he is not the same lively person we hear about, and he never will be that person again. both are cabeswater personified (although in different ways).

some more things:

"he once had been tight as ticks with his roommate czerny" "only whelk and czerny, treasure hunters and troublemakers" "it was possible that czerny's death wasn't for nothing after all" "[...] his days a ribbon floating aimlessly in water" (in relation to: "he had been a swimmer himself, once") "czerny, you're in a better place than me, i think" "whelk, standing in the wreckage of his life, didn't laugh this time" "the dry, half-eaten burger on the passenger seat / the first fast-food burger he'd had in seven years" "these days, when whelk was trying to comfort himself, he told himself that czerny was a sheep, but sometimes he slipped and remembered him as loyal instead" "we were friends"

whelk dying in the same place noah did. these lines:

both noah and barrington look the same in the end. broken, rumpled, forgotten. noah's family will never know his bones were reburied outside of their family plot. whelk's mother, however distant they are, will never be notified that her son has died. i think in a way barrington died at the exact same time noah did; something something invited into his body through czerny's death. basically what i'm getting at is, noah and barry could've been ronan and adam i think, had the circumstances been different. they never will be, but i think about it sometimes.

and there's so many more things i'm not even gonna TRY going into, like noah and whelk both being parallels to gansey (the three of them kings in their own right), or the disparity between whelk talking about czerny vs adele talking about noah, or whatever the fuck is going on with whelk's backstory in general (what's the deal with his mother? how the hell did he get the aglionby job? a random headcanon of mine is that his and noah's search for the ley line lead them to fox way, seven years before the events of the book, and that's partly why whelk refuses to give out his name to maura, because barrington is hard to forget, and easy to trace back)

there is so much to talk about here and i'm so peeved no one is doing it properly... why are we still talking about declan bringing his weekly girlfriend over to monmouth for no reason when we could be talking about whatever the fuck kinda soul-fate-destiny bullshit noah and whelk have!

you’re in his dms, i’m trapped with him in a tragedy where we have no control over our predetermined fates. we are not the same.

life without a working pair of earphones is no life at all

throwback to the dream thieves when adam “quietly turned eighteen” (adam parrish, who did everything quiet 😭) and then did this:

like. what else is there to say. the legend jumped out. he literally woke up from his metamorphosis sleep, downed a carton of pomegranate juice (pomegranate!!! the symbolism is exquisite— the death of the boy, the rebirth of the man— of the magician), inhaled some witch brew to heal himself spiritually, and went to go fix the plot of the book and rewrite the future. iconic behaviour.

More Jordan and Hennessy, Jordan Hennessy fanart I made. Feeling v artblocky lately but we persist

I love the implications of the seven birds being from a more technologically advanced world than faerun (knowledge of TV, understanding of machine guns "count the shells", using microphones ect) because how many things was Lucretia not able to erase? Across 99 planes, it's impossible that she managed to get everything. And how well was she really able to introduce the more medieval concepts of faerun into their memories?

What did the THB think everyone was doing just waving swords around rather than pulling out guns; did they just accept it and move on? Imagine Lucretia trying to explain them to a weapons development department of the BoB to equip her employees. Lucretia, a records keeper, who cannot have a great understanding of the inner workings of firearms. Vaguely describing rectangles that explode to a reception of horrified looks.

Or Taako repeatedly asking Sazed to supply him with various kitchen utensils he insists are vital for the recipe that just Do Not Exist. Magnus, complaining that he can't play little games on his stone of farspeech, while everyone around is completely baffled at the concept. Everyone around them not only not getting their pop culture references, but being fundamentally incapable of understanding them.

I just think there is something so funny about them functionally time travelling and then promptly forgetting they were from a different era at all. And just. Having to get on with it.

I’m not sure if it’s intentional, but I love that each raven boy corresponds to a horseman of the apocalypse:

Ronan: war (fights anything with a social security number, is also battling his own emotions/fears)

Noah: pestilence (his body/spirit decaying over time)

Adam: famine (often described as hungry, represents a more figurative interpretation of starvation/desire)

Gansey: death (for obvious reasons)

I guess Noah and Gansey could be switched, as Noah is quite literally dead and Gansey could be interpreted as Conquest in place of Pestilence.

anyways, I just thought this was kind of interesting