I Have Been Eating Good As Of Late. Too Good.

the ritalin is kicking in, i am going to blog instead of study hehehhehhehehgehge *rubs hands*

having a crush on someone makes me want to take a step back and reconnect with nature man, please pray for me during this hard time

i am back on lexapro :(

i need to get through this week

nikto and vodka

Pookie can you tag your art better cause I wanna see it all tqq <3

ahhhh will do! i think i will put them under the tag "zoloft4nikto" from now! thank you too for wanting to see my silly art ;w;;;

love ur username as a person who’s been on zoloft withdrawal twice

hhehehe i remember trying to quit zoloft cold-turkey and i wouldn't stop vomiting for a month straight, never again 🙏

wouldn't recommend not listening to your psychiatrist but whatever the purpose of trying to quit zoloft was, it kinda worked, in a different way. i was on a pretty high dose of several meds, quitting everything means they have to start with smaller dosage again, so cheaper meds and multiple months backward in recovery 👍

When asked if the process needed to be posted, I was told yes. So get it).

I don't know where I dug up this sudden burst of energy, perhaps my body decided to get one last fuck up before the imminent pre-graduation practicum.

Nikto is chopping wood when it hits you. You're watching from your back porch door, a porcelain mug of hot chocolate cradled in your warm palms.

It's cold- far too cold for Nikto to be chopping wood in your garden right now. A thick layer of frost blanketing everything in sight- in which he had scraped your car for you earlier this morning whilst you were still in bed. He's still in his sleeping clothes; his thin black shirt that stuck to his body in a thick sleeve or fabric, and those baggy grey sweatpants that hung low on his hips. He's still refused to let you stitch the hemming- which is frayed and worn. Insisting that it is no use fixing it. There's no fixing it, llubov. I'll let it fray and throw it later. No use.

It was certainly a sight. He had drunk his tea down quickly once he noticed your shivering shoulders. Wrapped you up in that fluffy cream nightgown of yours, and set out to fill the fireplace. A silent promise to keep you warm. To provide. He had shot you a stern look at the sight of you lingering in the doorway- your pyjamas shorts and lack of slippers irking him. You wanted to roll your eyes at him. Used to his picking. You are a little warm soft thing. You need to stay warm.

"you're acting like a husband". You quip softly. Playfully, that smile that could warm butter on your pretty lips. "Do you want to be my husband, Andre?".

"yes".

Nikto's sincere raspy voice is sincere as he answers immediately- stunning you into silence. Glancing up at you to fix you an intense stare as he split the log with his hands. Something soft and eager in his eyes. Apprehensive on his own behalf, but filled with longing.

"you'll always be warm". He vows. Eyes filled with something- devotion. So tremendous, that it rattles you to the bone. His eyes meet yours, and you're not sure you can look away. Can't find your hands to sever the line. Pinning you down. He makes the first move- leaving the axe by the tree stump, shoes crunching in the glittering frosted grass. Approaching you like a weary hound.

"then in that case, may I mend these then?". You mumble. Now shy, your heart quivering at the intensity in his face. His hand meets yours as it brushes over the frayed hem of his sweatpants- a warm, halting hold. An unsure pause, you think... Before his shoulders relax a little, and his fingers wiggle softly between yours to melt into an embrace of hands. A gesture so sweet, so unsure and new to him, it was his turn to fluster. Feline eyes wandering from your eyes to your fingers clasped with his.

"yes. I... Let's try".

i love the new style my lovelyyyyy

thank you dear liz!!!! i had a compulsion to do it!! at least everything looks more cohesive now :3