Valdeswan - Attempting To Write

Hey. Minors following me. Internet safety is key!! NEVER include these in your bio/byf:

Medical diagnoses - this is nobody's business but yours. You don't owe anyone an explanation for why you are the way that you are

Trauma - same reason as above

Triggers - people can use these against you! Don't give people tools to hurt you. No one has to know what tags you block. Just block tags to stay safe!

Age - age is okay for adults to include but is iffy when you're a teen. Predators want this information, don't give people more than they need. Just state that you're a minor, that's all that anyone needs to know.

In general: stay safe. If you're not comfortable with every stranger out there having access to this information, you shouldn't post it on the internet.

Play devil's advocate and ask yourself about what would happen if someone searched for your information with intent to hurt you. You do NOT owe anyone an explanation!

yo for the record if you put something in my inbox and i never respond it’s not that i didn’t like it or read it it’s that i very very often see messages and go ‘oh i should respond to that’ and then i fucking forget until it’s like. been enough time to be weird

Is the fact that when he did get close to someone, they died, so he never understood what came next in friendship or any other kind of relationship.

What do you do with the people that you love? He doesn't know, because he never had the time. He never learned how to share. With who? The dead? The graves? The rests of his loved ones? God?

You know most of the time people get angry at Cale because he can't for the life of him communicate things as they are, specifically regarding his health and seems to be unable to register his family worries for him.

And to that I said, of fucking course, his whole life on earth was horrible and he didn't develop emotionally because let's do a quick recap:

His parents died.

His abusive uncle took him in

He ended up in an orphanage.

When he was twenty the world collapsed.

He was bullied because he didn't have abilities.

Then the shelter he was in was destroyed

Once again he was alone until he met with LSH and CJS and let's not forget he was already 20 something.

Not long after they died as well.

Then he closed off with everyone because he didn't want to get attached just to lose them again.

He woke up in a novel

GoD confirmed he was supposed to die not CJS nor LSH.

He had to face his past again due to SG test.

...Well you get my point by now he was a little too busy surviving for him to actually develop self worth, most of his life he learned he wasn't someone who deserves affection or care and unfortunately no one said otherwise and if they did they die leaving him worse than before.

So it is no wonder he keeps things to himself all the time, after all why would others worry about him it makes no sense? At least from his pov.

That's why he is so detached at the beginning, still he can't help but try fixing things because it is the only action he knows

Surviving and saving others is so deeply engrained in him that unknowingly he keeps getting in a bigger mess. He got attached against his best efforts and gives more than he can take because he is not used to getting, the people who ever gave him anything always ended up dying before he could understand being emotional or plainly having emotions is normal.

forced to work and go to college, born to kiss jason todd on the forehead and keep him in my pocket

Dick: When I was your age-

Jason, mocking Dick: When I was your height.

Dick:

Dick: Listen here you little shit-

I literally started today, I'm in ch 4 and I don't know how I feel about it 🏌️

But congrats to the actors that are getting married, good for them honestly

I'm watching Supernatural for the first time in 2024. So that's... uh...

a choice.

He is like a russian doll but when you take out another doll it is a new trauma.

Me pointing at Cale: This man has so many layers inside of him just like an onion and also just like an onion the deeper you cut through the layers the more it makes you cry

cuack i drew them again

I love him ✌️😔

About your doodle request (?) Jason watering his half dead indoor plants ((super random but I'm really tired and I just had this vision))

Pre-patrol plant watering.

It's too cloody and cold in Gotham for his succulent 😔

obsessed with like, Jason who absolutely refuses to reconcile with the bats. he wants no part in that family and will not talk to them under any circumstances. but he's legally dead with no friends and sometimes he gets sick of being completely by himself and wants to have company. so.

Bruce: hey Alfred have you seen my-

*comes into kitchen to see Alfred calmly preparing dinner while Jason Todd, Killer Red Hood, silently does paperwork while sat on the corner of the kitchen counter*

Bruce:

Bruce: uh-

Tim, doing homework at the table: don't mention it. if you acknowledge him he'll leave. he just likes being around people sometimes.

the bats have to start treating him like a stray cat, letting him go to them and acting completely unbothered by his presence because if they even make eye contact with Jason he'll jump out the window and they 1. won't see him for a month and 2. will start to see a lot more murders cropping up around gotham.

eventually it gets to the point where Dick will come to dinner to see the rest of the family wordlessly ignoring the brick shithouse of a man who is just sat on the floor of the dining area reading a book and he has to just. take a breath and pretend Jason isn't there. calmly stepping around him without acknowledging him. Alfred will silently place a plate of food by the guys elbow while speaking to Damian about school. When they decide to move from the table to the tv room for a movie night none of them can even look around when they hear him eventually follow just to sit in the corner of this room instead.

Bruce: I'm concerned, this is abnormal for Jason. what if he's been drugged with something? or he's trying to gain sensitive information?

Damian: actually he used to do this a lot after he came out of the Lazarus pit. he liked to sit in and watch me train, and occasionally we'd find him sat by grandfathers feet while he ran meetings. Mother says it's important to let him settle, because it's likely that he's simply craving human intimacy on his own terms for once.

Bruce, crying: oh

Jason still refuses to say a word to any of them unless it's in costume, and even then it's the same old 'i'm not your son! i'm not one of you! fuck off!' shtick like normal. they just have to accept him sneaking into the house every now and then too.

one time Tim needs Red Hoods info on a case he's working and since Jason's been sat on the floor against the wall of the bat cave for the past 45 minutes just. staring into space and vibing. he risks sliding the file across the floor towards him before pointedly turning back to the batcomputer, the info he needs marked clearly. five minutes later it's wordlessly slid back, info filled out and Jason refusing to acknowledge Tim's existence again. it's the only way he'll communicate with them.

after a while it gets to the point where Jason will straight up go to bludhaven and break into Dicks apartment just to silently sit in the corner of the room and Be Around A Familiar Person. Tim comes back from his lunch brake at WE to find him sat on the edge of his desk, working through a case. They work in silence for the rest of the day and when Tim leaves Jason just follows. They get a batburger together but the second Tim slips up and asks how his day was he's off like a shot. Damian regularly eats lunch at school on the roof while Jason plays mario kart on a DSI next to him. Batman will be 4 hours into a solo stake out when civilian Jason will silently slide up next to him with a crossword. they never talk. Jason still makes it clear that he's pissed at Bruce. Bruce doesn't know what else to do but let him be and hope eventually, with enough time, things will progress even further.

Dick, whispering so Jason won't pick up on the fact that he's being perceived: are you sure this is normal

Damian: is anything about any of us normal

Tim: he's got a point. at least we know Jason's watching us. I did this shit all the time before I was Robin, and none of you ever noticed me.

Dick:

Tim: sometimes its comforting to be in the same room as people you're familiar with, even if you can't handle interacting with them.

Dick, crying: ok