Masterlist Of The Batfam Social Media AU Posts

I know there are a lot of fanfics about Jason being caught by the Justice League and usually getting bailed out by the batfam, but imagine if it was Brucie Wayne bailing him out:

In the JL interrogation room:

Superman: Alright, Red Hood, who is your supplier helping you move drugs in Star City?

Red Hood, who was undercover investigating a drug ring and got caught in a JL bust and sesnses an opportunity to mess with Batman: Look, I know you guys aren't cops, but can I get at least get one phone call?

Justice league looking skeptical?

Red Hood: You can even monitor it.

Green Arrow: Fine one phone call, but it will be monitored.

Hands Hood a phone

Red Hood: Hey Dad, I got stopped by the Justice League. Could you come bail me out? Really, okay, see you soon. Okay, my Dad said that he would bail me, so could we go over to the teleporters?

Green Arrow: Okay, firstly, we aren't cops, you can't just post bail and get out. Secondly, how would this "Dad" get up here?

Red Hood: You'll see.

Minutes later, Brucie Wayne walks in with a trail of Heroes, trying to explain why he cannot be at the Watchtower.

Superman: Mr. Wayne what are you doing here and how did you get here?

Bruce laying the Brucie persona on thick: Well as one of the Justice League's biggest doners and tech suppliers I have access to the teleporters, as for why I'm here it's to bail out my son. Hi Jaylad!

Red Hood fully expecting Batman: What?

Green Arrow remembering his friend's grief over loosing Jason: Ummmm, Mr. Wayne this is the Red Hood. You know "Bag full of severed heads" Red Hood.

Brucie: Yes, I know he's had some issues with his big feelings, but he's still my sweet little boy.

Superman: And you think that he's your late son Jason Todd?

Brucie: Yes, Batman even confirmed it was him. It turns out that after he died, he was brought back by an organization that planned on using him as a weapon against Batman. But he left them and has been working to improve Crime Alley, I'm so proud of him.

Green Arrow: We caught him in Star City with Drug runners.

Brucie: I'm sure he has a good explanation, don’t you Jaylad?

Red Hood still reeling from Bruce showing up as Brucie and not Batman: I was undercover?

Brucie: See perfectly reasonable, now can I please have my baby boy back? Alfred will be so upset if he's not home for dinner.

Surprisingly, this works , the Justice League is to stunned by this revelation and later confirm this with Batman that yes, the notorious Red Hood is the son of Billionaire, philanthropist airhead Brucie Wayne. Jason, meanwhile, has suffered a huge blow to his cred in the Hero community because of the association with Brucie instead of the Batfam. The bat siblings do not let this go anytime soon.

Hmmm

I'm on a Danny is Dick's child kick rn so I'm making more.

But lets add in some Ghost King Danny!, Dad to a deaged Ellie and Dan! And toddler Mar'i Grayson.

Danny was conceived during Dick's amnesia year when he was Ric and the woman couldn't find him to tell him (or maybe the Owls caught wind of the pregnancy and took her) and he ended up somehow (hmmm maybe a meddling time keeper?) with the Fentons.

Danny grows as a Fenton, he knows he was adopted btw, then becomes Phantom, protects Amity, becomes the Ghost King and things seem to be going okay between Amity Parkers and the Infinite Realms since they took care of the GIW problem, AND has been a good doting teen dad to his deaged 'cousins/clones' turned kids.

Danny was going to go pick his kids up from daycare one day when CHAOS happens. Just as he wrangles Ellie onto his shoulders, cause she wants to be tall today, and about to take Dan's hand cause he's and I quote "A big boy and not a baby like Ellie, Dad!" he suddenly feels the tug of his family being in danger.

Thing is, its a blood related danger. Meaning someone blood related to him was in grave danger, and by the emotions he can feel, its someone young, way younger than him.

Problem.

The only people Danny knows with his blood in their veins and are young enough for the feeling are with him.

So who?

But due to Danny being a protector spirit AND knowing the feeling is from someone as young as his own kids, Danny decides to use his Ghost King Powers to summon said person from the danger to him.

Danny opens his free arms out just as a tiny toddler with black hair like his own but with bright green eyes, even the sclera were green, in a ruined party dress drops from the sky from the summoning circle that had opened above him.

Danny stares at the terrified child, whose hands are tied by rope and was crying, and takes notes of certain traits she had that he saw every time in the mirror or on his own kids, same eye shape and cheekbones. He can tell his ghost core has claimed her as family but not as his kid though.

No the connection that formed was almost like his connection with Jazz but a bit stronger.

This kid, was his sister. His blood related one.

-Meanwhile-

Dick Grayson, aka Nightwing, and his family were freaking the fuck out.

Dick was already panicked when his daughter Mar'i had gotten kidnapped just a few hours ago by the Joker.

Now he was feeling pure dread when his daughter, who was about to be killed, was suddenly pulled into a strange glowing circle at the last minute and disappeared into thin air.

How about a fic where the Fenton portal was opened in like the 90s and so Phantom was the literal First Known Hero. Which is why he was hunted and there wasn’t any law to stop the Anti-ecto acts. And when Phantom Planet happened, he just disappeared, or retired. He went to Gotham U for uni and meets Bruce Wayne there and they hit it off as good friends and later wild romance partners who slept around. And when they graduated they separated to do their own thing but Danny returns once in awhile to visit Bruce.

They also meet randomly when Bruce goes on work trips in random countries and cities. They never mention the kids and Danny doesn’t know about Batman. Bruce doesn’t know about Phantom. He just thinks Danny is an engineer that travels for work. Which he is, but he’s also mainly the Ling of the Infinite Realms and appears in other countries and cities bc that’s conveniently where natural portals are spawning.

What Danny doesn’t know is that since he’s taken up the mantle of king, the zone has changed to match him. So it’s much more welcoming and natural portals spawn where Bruce is bc he lowkey is in love with him and just doesn’t realize it. And vice versa, Bruce is lowkey in love with Danny and they fawn over each other when they meet up without realizing that’s what’s happening. But Alfred knows, he’s known for awhile. And so does Jazz.

So when one day, Alfred brings up that Danny is in town in Gotham and Bruce says to set a time for them to meet, one of the kids hear this and they wonder who this Danny is, bc they’ve never heard his name. It becomes a Wayne Mystery when that week, Bruce is out most nights and portions of the day and comes back looking happy and soft. Which freaks everyone out and they stalk Danny and realize they’re meeting each other and this man is someone Bruce cares about a lot. So they bring him up at dinner one day and Bruce is like, oh yea he’s an old friend of mine. And when pressed on why they haven’t heard or met him, Bruce just says that they’ve never brought it up and since Danny isn’t around a lot, and Bruce is a little self aware of himself at this point, doesn’t want this relationship to affect the kids since they aren’t exclusive or together really.

So the kids plot and get Danny to come to the Manor for dinner. They then realize during dinner, watching Bruce and Danny interact, that holy shit, this is their other dad. They’re so in sync that they don’t realize it and he’s so good with the kids too and Bruce is so happy when he’s around…

Cue the batfamily kids Parent Trapping the two, with the help of Alfred who is all for it bc he likes Danny.

In the end, Danny decides to stay at the Manor and the kids can now call him other dad, or pops, or some variation. But they all collectively don’t mention the vigilante side they have, since they all figured it out themselves. Their new dad can do so too. Which then spirals when all of the kids Omar’s out on Patrol, Alfred is on Vacay, and Danny is alone in the house when Talia comes a knocking, bc she knows that Danny has always had Bruce’s heart and wants him gone. She’s always been jealous of their relationship so she tries to kill him. The family realize what’s happened when Damian sees some League members watching them on patrol and they race back home to see Danny decimating the assassins and Talia. He sees the family in their costumes and thinks, oh wow this makes all the sense now.

And they see Danny as a ghost, which Bruce recognizes as Phantom, the first hero!!!! And they all sit down and talk about it.

There’s probs more too but that’s all I have rn.

HOT TAKE

But I like the idea of the phantom world being reincarnated into very unexpected people.

Like I still love the idea of Danny being Martha or Thomas.

Or Dani being another clone, or her being Damian, and Sam being Poison Ivy and or Martha, etc.

But I also like the unhinged nonsense of Sam being a clone in the dc world — ideally Kon, and Dani (or Dan) being Bruce, while Vlad is gasp Thomas Wayne.

HEAR ME OUT

JUST HEAR ME OUT

I just think the idea of Danny finding out that in an alternate world he married a nicer and age appropriate Vlad and had the son the guy has been demanding for so long in their world is hilarious.

The absolute mental breakdown that boy will go through: this is my son, and I love him, look at him go being a hero and kicking ass, but holy fucking Ancients above I fucked VLAD —

And on the other hand, can you imagine Bruce’s reaction? To his alternate mom being a sassy teenage boy, his alternate dad being an older guy ‘preying’ on this kid that absolutely HATES the guy, and being an absolute creep while his alt self **gestures to your choosing** is either a tiny girl menace or the biggest and meanest growling ghost that is BARELY tolerating being in the same space as the living.

But they also hate his alternate dad and would punch him into next week with Mom! Danny.

This man will being going THROUGH IT.

Short DPXDC Prompts #232

Danny starts as a low level intern in Wayne Industries and is very concerned when people keep referring to him as Tim and keep asking him to sign papers and attend meetings that aren’t remotely in his job description.

So, Danny gets a job as a repairman on the watchtower! He's liven his best life and being the definite human man who fixes stuff. However! Problem, he's got no chill when he reeealy needs chill to work this job, the solution? Shit talk in ghost speak! Not like anyone can hear him, it's a completely silent, ghost specific, form of psychic communication! People can in fact, hear him. Specifically the green lanterns, martian manhunter (though, he doesn't understand a word), captain marvel, and superman.

The green lantern rings are outfitted for the exact scenario that he thought protected his chill facade.

Martian manhunter could theoretically understand if he filtered it manually but he has no clue how to do that.

Captain Marvel is the champion of magic and thus knows all magic based communication methods instinctively.

Superman is annoyed as hell batman didn't tell him that he hired a sub-species of kryptonian as an engineer and is refusing to talk to him until he is on world again.

Gotham Twitter Au Masterlist

Started: 2024 June 15

Last Updated: 2024 June 19

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Part One

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Part Seven

Part Eight

Part Nine

Part Ten

Part Eleven

Part Twelve

Part Thirteen

"HOW DID HE FIND OUT?!" Bruce asked, calmly. (Batfamily Chronicles Microseries)

Young Tim getting the job as Robin in the best (confirmed canon) way possible. I honestly love that this happened in the comics, but as you can see, this is my headcanon and embellished. I did a rewrite of the original version of this.

Tim (13 at the time) chewed on a Pop-Tart he brought to Wayne Manor, along with a briefcase.

Alfred: Timothy Drake, Master Wayne and Grayson will be here in a second.

Tim ate his whole Pop-Tart and turned to see Dick and Bruce, mentally reminding himself to not freak out... That didn't work. 

Tim: OH MY GOD, YOU'RE DICK GRAYSON!

Tim rushes and hugs Dick, burying his head in the man’s stomach. 

Bruce: Um, why did you— 

Tim: Give me a few seconds, other guy.

Bruce: Other guy? Ouch.

Dick patted the kid on the head, confused but enjoying the appreciation.

Tim (elated): This is the greatest day of my life, and I haven’t even gotten to my proposal.

Dick (confused): Which is? 

Tim (clinging to the man’s body): That you, Dick Grayson, son of the Flying Graysons, are Nightwing, that you were the first, yes, first Robin, and that I’m hugging you! You smell like citrus fruit! 

Tim smiles.

Dick: Thanks, I use a special body wash— What the hell did you just say?

Bruce shook with rage as Alfred took a seat with a plate of cookies, ready to watch the spectacle. Tim stopped hugging his hero and bounced eagerly.

Tim: You’re Nightwing, who was also the first Robin, before Jason was brought in, and my hero, Dick Grayson of the Flying Graysons! This is awesome!

Dick (noticing Bruce glaring at him): Good joke, kid. I have no idea what you are talking about. 

Tim: Oh, don’t worry about Bruce; I know he's Batman too. 

Alfred: I'm elated to be witnessing this.

Alfred ate a cookie as Bruce’s expression turned from rage towards his oldest son to shock. 

Bruce: Hypothetically speaking, because you're not correct, what evidence would you have... child.

Bruce glared at Dick with the last word because of the fact there’s a young child who might have figured out their identities.

Tim: You want to see my evidence? Oh my God, I never thought I'd see this day coming! I've been holding onto this information for years!

Alfred chucklef.

Bruce (gritted teeth): For years?!

Tim (not noticing the obvious tension): Look at me; I gotta control myself. Fanboying like this. I’m so sorry! Let me get my proof ready. 

Tim opened his briefcase. Dick felt an intense glare from Bruce.

Tim: You know the first suit you had was gaudy, but it worked for you. You are so cool, Nightwing. 

Dick: I will tell Nightwing that, because he is not here… Bruce, please stop looking at me like that.

Bruce (whispering angrily): I will slap you like a pimp if we can't dispute the proof.

Dick (whispering): It could’ve been because of you.

Alfred (overhearing the two): No, it's not; he discussed what he found out before I got you two.

Dick took a few steps away from Bruce.

Dick: Hey, Tim, show us this disputable proof. 

Tim: You remembered my name! This is going well so far. Okay, let me get my first piece of evidence. To start, I have this picture I got at the circus, the one with the mother-flipping Dick Grayson! I’ve had it for a time, but kept it in pristine condition. This wasn't what clicked in my mind; I was young at the time. I wanted you to sign it.

Tim passed Dick the picture and a Sharpie pen. Dick signed it with his exact signature that he would use for a Nightwing autograph causing Bruce to throw his hands up angry, already seeing what's about to happen.

Tim: I’m a big fan of the Flying Graysons, which Dick Grayson was in. Then he got adopted by Bruce Wayne after his parents died— so sad. For a few years, I couldn’t connect it since I was so young and naive. 

Dick: How old are you now? 

Tim (excited): Thirteen! 

Bruce (in disbelief): You're… Thirteen? 

Bruce slowly turned to Dick.

Bruce: Thirteen?! 

Dick: He hasn’t proven anything yet.

Alfred kept chuckling as Bruce talked to Tim.

Bruce: Let’s pretend that I am Batman and... my soon-to-be-yelled-at son is Nightwing. How did you figure that out, young man? 

Tim: Oh my God, I love this part. Four years ago, I was in town, and Nightwing stopped a criminal, and while being his usual awesome self, he did this really cool, stupendous trick that I’d only ever seen when Dick Grayson was in the circus. I kind of put two and two together after that. And I'm not even kidding about that! I was able to figure out that you had two different Robins, that you are Batman, and that Jason Todd—may he rest in peace—also was adopted by Bruce Wayne, who had adopted Dick Grayson who moved to bludhaven where Nightwing, stay with me now, lives!

Tim drank his ginger tea from his thermos, parched after unveiling all the information he learned.

Bruce (deadpan): That was a lot to process. 

Dick (nervous): You said four years ago… Wow, is it time for my appointment—

Dick attempted to escape, but Bruce yanked him back by his ear. 

Bruce: No, no, no, you need to hear how this fan of yours figured it out. The fan that four years ago—meaning that he was freaking 9 years old—figured out how you are Nightwing and also were Robin, and about to be smacked!

Dick: I could stay a few minutes because that’s circumstantial. That doesn’t mean anything. Tons of kids know that move.

Tim and Alfred: No, they don’t.

Bruce: I’m actually going to beat your ass. That’s for later though; continue your theory, 13-year-old boy!

Alfred (intrigued): Keep going, child; you’re doing great.

Bruce growled at Alfred to stop talking, but Alfred shrugged with a smile.

Alfred: The young man shouldn't be afraid to tell you how he figured it out. Go easy on him; he's not the one that’s about to be in trouble. 

Tim (unaware of the tension): Thank you, Mr. Pennyworth.

Dick: Oh Lord, he’s so sweet too. Um, I mean this is circumstantial evidence, debatable if we could even call it evidence… such a coincidence! No way would I be that awesome and attractive! Look at me; I’m wearing khakis. I can’t be Nightwing. I am not that strapping Casanova with amazing hair who rocked that first suit. Thank you for that compliment, by the way… Nightwing will like to hear that.

Tim (hugging Dick again): Aw, Nightwing, you don’t have to be embarrassed. I was a fan of both of you, and learning you’re the same person… I just love it!

Bruce (chuckling dryly): That’s going to benefit him in the next 5 minutes when I’m screaming in his ear.

Dick: I doubt he has any other proof. 

Tim: Wait, I’m not done yet. That’s how this picture returns to the play. When I met up with you as Nightwing two days after you stopped that criminal, I pretended to put myself in danger so you could save me. Then, when you did, I had you sign a page in my autograph book. You signed that and —I'll get to the picture itself.

Tim took out a small notebook from his briefcase and placed the photo on the table. Dick, Bruce, and Alfred examined the autographs. Dick futally attempted to sneak away but Bruce grabbed him by his arm and brought him back over.

Tim: It’s an exact match! Hm, last thing.

Tim removed the cap on the marker and scribbled a mask over young Dick Grayson’s eyes in the picture.

Tim: If you cover your eyes like this, it’s the exact same guy. That’s all. 

Alfred clapped like a man at the opera. Tim's smile beamed at the appreciation. Meanwhile, Bruce and Dick's eyes widened, but Bruce became incredibly angry.

Tim: I sat on this info for a few years after that. Then Jason Todd—may he rest in peace—died. So here I am at Wayne Manor, ready to be Robin. Do I have to tell my parents about this? I don’t mind—they travel a lot; they’re the best! That’s why I was just wondering if it’s okay to tell them. 

Bruce (chuckling, but in a manner hiding his rage): He’s not an orphan and doesn’t have a terrible home life. This is just great! A 13-year-old boy figured out YOU, not ME, are Nightwing! I told you… I told you!

Tim: You believe me? Please, believe me. I’ve done a lot of research. 

Bruce shook from the cuteness intelligence of the child.

Bruce: You are right!

Dick: God damn it, yeah, you’re right.

Tim: Yes! I did it! I cracked my first case! I can be the new Robin! I can be your brother! I’ve never had a brother! 

Tim hugged Dick Grayson, sobbing happily. Dick patted him on the head again, feeling Bruce’s glare.

Tim (blissfully ignorant about the tension): I have new designs and everything too. Because... I’m wearing pants in this. I need to stress that. I WILL be wearing pants.

Bruce: I hate to burn down this parade, but I’m still… adjusting to the fact my son is dead and not interested in any new Robins. 

Tim: Yeah, but please, Mr. Wayne. I can be a great sidekick.

Bruce: How come I get Mr. Wayne when you call him Nightwing at every turn?

Tim (looking at Nightwing with a smile): He’s my hero.

Dick (sniffling): I... can’t be here.

Dick runs off; Bruce chased after him then walked back to his office, gripping the man’s ear.

Dick: Ow, Bruce! I’m sorry! Ow! I’m sorry! I thought it was foolproof! Let me talk to— Ow!

Bruce Wayne shoved his son into the office, then slammed the door shut behind them.

Bruce: In all my years as a hero, you’ve talked to me about telling a woman I’m Batman, yet you, Mr. Let me wear an eye mask and do acrobatics, got I.D. by a child! I'm livid, but also amazed at how you did not LISTEN TO ME!

Dick pouted, holding his head down, but it wasn’t because of Jason’s death.

Bruce: Don't you do it. Don't you cry!

Dick bursted into tears, sobbing like a child.

Bruce: Nope, nope, not falling for it! This is your fault! You had to do the stupid circus tricks, which I told you not to do.

Dick (between sobs): The kid seems really... smart, and my costume… was a good design! 

Bruce: He figured out who you were when he was 9! He was in third or fourth grade when he figured out who you were! At least I only got Jason as Robin because he was stealing my tires!

Dick: Why are you yelling at me?! 

Bruce: I'm not yellin—

Bruce took a breath.

Bruce: I’m not yelling; I’m talking sternly because… I'm angry, and it happens to sound loud! 

Dick (whimpering): That's yelling!

Dick sobbed, covering his face. Bruce rolled his eyes. Alfred opened the door without knocking or asking to come in.

Alfred: You should look at his designs; they're pretty good and have pants. 

Dick: Mine was a cute design!

Bruce: No, it wasn't. Alfred, just feed the child or something while I deal with my idiot. 

Dick: Rude... Alfred, don’t leave.

Alfred closed the door, heading back to give Tim something to eat.

Bruce: I have to figure out something because I can't deal with another kid sidekick. It's not happening.

Dick (wiping his eyes): Because you miss Jason? 

Bruce didn't respond, deciding to leave the office and tell Tim to leave.

Dick: Wait, Bruce, don't talk to him!

Dick tackled Bruce to the ground and tossed him back into his office, slamming the door shut, leaving Dick in the hallway.

Dick: I will handle this. Especially I missed Jason's funeral after finding out he died.

Bruce (behind the closed door): I had to carry his dead body!

Dick: It's not a contest!

Dick headed to the kitchen, where Tim was coloring his suit design with a red colored pencil.

Dick: Hey… Tim, want to get... ice cream together and chat about possibly becoming Robin?

Tim (trying to remain calm): I would... I would like that very much. 

Tim dumped all his materials back into the leather briefcase, jumped out of his seat, and headed to the door. Dick sighed, pulling his car keys out of his pocket.

Dick: I'm never living this down. 

Alfred: Not at all. Be nice to the child though.

Dick groaned, then forced a smile and took Tim out for ice cream. Bruce was going to be cold towards Tim, but Dick saw the vigor in that kid's eyes. Plus, he was a fan of his, and he needed that kindness at the moment.

It took some convincing and Tim saving Bruce's life, but the caped crusader reluctantly took Tim Drake in as his third Robin. At the time he was doubtful where things would go. Tim saw the pain the Batman was burying, he saw the man was at a breaking point and would either break his kill rule or kill himself and Tim didn't want that to happen.

He may have been a huge fan of Nightwing, but he respected Batman enough to aid him not only as a sidekick, but a son/friend.

And the rest... is history.

I want more Dad!Tim stuff. (And once again a deaged Danny and Ellie idea)

So let's go do that.

So you know those DPxDC AUs where Tim makes a deal with either Clockwork or Danny to carry Ellie? Or Tim is a reborn Danny whose carrying Ellie instead (love these first btw) in order to get Bruce out of the time stream.

Well what about instead of just Ellie, it's both her and Danny.

Danny and Ellie who were badly hurt by the GIW that they both had to revert into their cores. They are saved by their friends/family and are taken to Frostbite. There they are monitored and looked after only until they can finally the reform but they run into a problem. The two can't return to their home dimension due to the GIW activity and they cant stay to long in the Infinite Realms cause they are still halfas. Then one day CW appears to speak with Frostbite over something important about the two.

Meanwhile in the DCverse.

Tim might have figured a way to save Bruce from the timestream. A being known as Clockwork might be able to help him if he manages to summon the powerful 'Ancient'.

However he knows summoning and requesting it's help he will have to pay a price.

If it means getting Bruce back he'll do it...

Ok we all talk about the Pevensies’ trauma at returning to Earth at the end of The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe and their trouble readjusting to life there again but think of all the funny/good parts too

They return from the country, and their mom is surprised when all her children hug her at the station. Even Peter, who thinks he’s all grown up. Even Edmund, who went away surly and withdrawn. She doesn’t know her children haven’t seen her in over a decade.

They miss their dear Cair Paravel, but they absolutely do not miss its chamber pots. Indoor plumbing is amazing.

It takes a while to remember how modern technology works, though. How many heart attacks did the siblings give their parents or the professor because they walked into a dark room only to turn on the light and find the children sitting there in the dark. (They were by the window! There was still plenty of light from the sunset! They would have gotten a candle in a minute!) The kids sheepishly remember oh yeah electricity is a thing.

(Edmund has a new electric torch in Prince Caspian. He was so excited to get that torch. Almost more excited than you’d think a kid his age would be, and his parents expect Peter at least to tease him, but the siblings all agree light in your hand at the touch of a switch is terrific.)

Suddenly getting really high grades in some subjects and terrible in others. Their grammar, reading comprehension, spelling, vocab, even penmanship? Amazing. History and geography? They don’t remember anything. One time in class Susan forgets Earth is round and wants to die.

Also they can never remember what the date is supposed to be because Narnia uses different months and years. They can estimate time really well by looking at the sun though, and Edmund at least can always tell which way is north etc without thinking about it (again, using the sun)

Okay but how many times did they go to pick something up or reach something and realize they are so much shorter and less muscled than they expect? It’s a common sight to see Peter climbing on counters to reach a top cabinet, grumbling about how he’s High King this is demeaning. (No he never takes the extra five seconds to grab a stool. He will climb that shelf.)

Peter and Susan being delighted because they are no longer almost thirty. (In a few years Edmund and Lucy will tease them about being old and their parents will not understand.)

Lucy doesn’t have to deal with periods anymore for a few years yet. Susan might not either. Heck yeah

Lucy loves to climb into her siblings’ laps and be cuddled. In Narnia she eventually she grew too big, but now she is small and snuggleable again. Peter is her favorite, and if she’s upset, he’ll tickle her and tell bad jokes until she’s smiling again, but really she loves cuddling with all her family. She grew up without her parents; how many times did she just want to crawl into her mom’s lap and her mom was a world away? Imagine the first time she realizes she can now. Or, imagine one day, a cold and grey sort of day, when the rain is pattering against the windows, and it sounds like the rain on the windows of the Professor’s house, that first day they went exploring. It sounds like the day they played hide and seek. It sounds so like the rain on the windows of Cair Paravel, that if Lucy closes her eyes she can imagine she’s back there, having tea and chatting with Mr. Tumnus before the fireplace of her room, and soon the rain will stop, and they will go out on the balcony and wave to the naiads and the dryads and the mermaids, who have come out to enjoy the rain and visit one other on the banks of the Great River winding past Cair Paravel down to the sea.

But if Lucy looks out the window, all she’ll see is the rain over London, so it’s not only a cold and grey sort of day, it’s a lonely sort of day too.

Susan and Edmund are playing chess in the living room (and they must have studied with Professor Kirke, thinks their mother, because they certainly weren’t that good when they left). Lucy goes over to Edmund, and oh dear, thinks their mother, now he’s going to call her a baby and be horrible to her, but instead he picks her up and puts her on his lap without even taking his eyes off the chessboard; it’s simply a matter of course.

“Doesn’t the rain sound familiar?” says Lucy in a solemn, wistful way.

Their mother doesn’t know what that means, but her siblings must, because Susan says, “Yes, Lu, it does,” and Edmund gives her a little hug with his free arm as she tucks herself under his chin to watch the chess match.

(Five minutes later there is a crash from the next room as Peter falls off a counter. Their mother does not understand the words he must have picked up from the Professor, but he’s grounded for them anyway. His siblings have no respect for their High King, because they refuse to stop laughing.)