Ngl Talking With My Brothers Brought Me So Much Clarity About My Life.

I cried there three times today. I’m glad you walked in on me actually being productive this time.

I'm working to make myself better.

But that doesn't mean you need to make a bad decision.

Make the decision you truly want.

She wants a date.

She wants to share rent.

WHY RIGHT NOW D WHY RIGHT NOW

WHY DO YOU DECIDE TO BECOME MY GUARDIAN ANGEL RIGHT NOW

I APPRECIATE IT BUT THE CONFESSION IS REALLY BADLY TIMED

Sometimes I feel like crying and curling up and crying more but I know if I let it out it’ll worry people and I still have energy to keep going.

I’m fine everyone I’ll be alright!

I just need to find a period of time to be alone while I break down!

I can’t afford to break down in front of you right now, and if I break down at home my mom will bother me about it.

All I can do is listen to opal! “You’re strong, I know you are!”

I’ll stay strong for all of you! I have time to rest when I’m alone!

Update time!

I ended up taking the role!

I am now the proud voice of Noxiel the Angel! No idea what’s in store for him, but I can’t wait to find out.

This is going to be interesting to say the least!

"Goodnight bro, see you tomorrow"

He doesn't understand how much I needed to hear that, to know that he's going to spend time with me willingly. Sometimes it feels like people only talk to me because I initiate, but hearing those simple 5 words made everything feel okay. I feel like I'm back in 8th grade, making plans to go over and hang out in his backyard I feel like I'm free from all my troubles that came later. I'm free from the changes that I never wanted to make and were forced on me by... some bad people.

I feel like the person I want to be again. I feel like I am who I should be and who I would have been if not for all the shit I've went through.

I hope this feeling stays around for a while.

I hope he says those words again tomorrow. "Goodnight bro. See you tomorrow" Goodnight, bro.

I'll be here, enjoying the feelings those words gave me. It will be a good night.

I have yet again been encouraged to stay out of the public eye and keep to myself at school.

This is where my life is at this point 😔

J - Just

I - Into

R - Risky

A - Antics

I - I also wanna die and drink and jack off and die and drink and jack off and die and drink--

thank god.

thanks, brothers for talking to me about life stuff.

I promise if things don't work out in the next few years I'll move home and we can rentshare. I'd rather rentshare with you then with D anyway!

my brothers are awesome. They don't support every one of my decisions but they know it's okay to make mistakes.

my brothers have been with me since i stopped simply surviving and actually started living, and i only have them to thank for that.

that said, I'm not leaving this city anytime soon. I have lots to do here still and I'm not leaving anyone behind on a bad note.

I'll never take the easy way out :)

🫠🫠🫠