When Jaun Eliya Said: “ae Shakhs Ab Tu Mujhko Sab Kuch Qabool Hai, Yeh Bhi Qabool Hai Ke Tujhe Cheen

When Jaun Eliya said: “ae shakhs ab tu mujhko sab kuch qabool hai, yeh bhi qabool hai ke tujhe cheen laye koi” and when Sajid Rahim said: “main tujhe bhoolne par raazi hoon aaj tu iss qadar udaasi hai” and when Ahmed Faraz said: “iss se pehle ke bewafa hojayen kyun na aye dost hum judaa hojayen” my heart decided to move on before actually enduring the pain of losing the bond.

On the 12th day of Christmas my true love gave to me...

Wolfstar in a pizza parlor where they first meet.

“One deep dish pizza.”

Remus’ head jerked up from where it had rested, face down, on his folded elbows. There was a waiter standing over him in the dim light of the restaurant. He had thick, dark hair that curled around the antlers he was wearing, and a pin on his apron that read, May your days be cheesy and bright. Remus blinked up at him.

“What?”

The boy raised an eyebrow at him, “Your pizza.” When Remus still didn’t say anything he pushed it forward a little, “It’s a deep dish pizza.”

Remus looked down at the steaming meal, then back up at the boy. The name Sirius was embroidered over the cheesy pin. Remus thought it was a bit of an odd name. Maybe it was the name of the restaurant he was in, he couldn’t quite remember. Although, it was an odd name for a pizza restaurant too.

“I…Oh. I didn’t order a pizza.”

The boy—Sirius, possibly—cleared his throat, “Yeah. But you… you looked like you might, y’know,” He shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans, “need one.”

Remus shifted, “I look like I need a pizza?”

Sirius sighed, “You’re sitting her in a practically empty pizza place on Christmas Eve. It’s negative one degrees out and you walked in here with nothing but that sweater on and you’ve been sitting here with your head down for the past ten minutes.” Sirius shrugged, “Yeah, you need a pizza, in my opinion.”

Remus opened and closed his mouth a few times, “I…” Remus felt a flush start at his neck, “Thank you, but I can’t pay for it.” He pushed the menu away from him nervously. The top said Pizza Corner. So, Sirius was his name, “I don’t have any money—“

“Who said you had to—“

“I did.” Remus cut him off, looking back up at the boy, “I’m not taking free pizza from you.”

Sirius hesitated, hovering over the table. Remus wondered if he would shrug again and take the pizza back. Then he wondered if he would insist. He wasn’t sure which one he preferred. Then, Sirius let out a breath, took his antlers off, and slid into the booth opposite Remus. He picked up a slice of pizza, “Well, I’ll eat it then.”

Remus blinked, sitting up straighter, voice lost as Sirius started munching on the first slice. He nodded towards the pizza, “You can still have some, if you want.”

Remus looked at the pizza. Cheese was falling in strings onto the pan from the thick crust. The pepperoni looked spicy, the outer crust crunchy. His stomach growled painfully. He turned away.

Sirius produced two cans of ginger-ale from somewhere within his apron and slid on discreetly towards Remus, “What’s your name and why won’t you share my pizza?”

Remus scoffed, “You know why I won’t share your pizza.”

Sirius folded a second slice and took a bite, “But it’s sharing now!”

“Sirius—“

“Ah,” Sirius pointed his pizza at him, “You know my name, I should know yours.”

Remus pressed his lips together at his slip. He hadn’t mean to say it but…it was nice. It was a nice name, he decided. “Remus.”

“Remus.” Sirius nodded, like he was testing it out. Remus felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up, and goosebumps rise pleasantly. Then he pushed the tray towards him, “Remus, have a slice of pizza.”

“Jesus Christ.” Remus sighed and sat back in the booth.

Sirius just looked at him, eyes soft. Remus looked back for a moment, until he realized he’d started to admire rather than just look, and to wonder of Sirius was doing the same. He looked away.

“I don’t know what you think I’m trying to do, Remus.” Again, Remus fought the urge to shiver at Sirius’ voice, “I don’t know you, you don’t know me, I get it. But…” Sirius set his slice down on the tray and folded his arms on the table, “But, mate, I can see every notch in your spine through that sweater of yours and it isn’t the thickest thing in the world but it isn’t the thinnest either.” Sirius bit his lip, “Certainly not thick enough for weather like this.”

Remus looked down at his hands. They were red and raw from the wind. He hid them beneath his thighs and blinked hard.

“I don’t know your story,” Sirius’ voice was soft and calming, like he could sense Remus’ fight with himself, “but I recognize it. Just a little. I’ve lived it, maybe, or something like it and…” Sirius broke off, maybe regarding Remus or, maybe, maybe, admiring, “It’s just a pizza. It’s Christmas.”

Remus let out a shaky breathe, trying to calm his heart beat down. He felt frozen, and weak, and unbearably thankful. Who was he, to receive this? Slowly, without looking up, he reached forward and picked up a slice.

He heard Sirius let out a breath, “Okay. Good. Alright.”

Remus looked up as he took a bite and met Sirius’ eyes. He smiled, Instantly, Remus felt warmer. He told himself it was just the food entering his system for the first time in he wasn’t sure how long.

Sirius picked up his own slice and they ate in silence for a few minutes, Sirius cracking Remus’ ginger-ale open for him and sliding it the rest of the way across the table.

“So,” Sirius broke the silence when he reached his third slice, “Do you have a place to stay?”

Remus looked up, swallowed thickly, “Don’t push it. I’m eating your damn pizza.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow, “Yeah, I’ve gotten this far, I damn well am gonna push it.”

Remus rolled his eyes, “Yes. I do.”

Sirius just looked at him, chewing slowly.

Remus sighed, “No. I mean.” Remus took another bite, “Yeah, no. No.”

“Well, I do.”

“Good on you.” Remus grumbled.

“So.” Sirius pressed on, “So, you do too.”

“No. What? No—“

“Why?” Sirius waved his arm and a piece of pepperoni went flying to the floor by the opposite booth. He looked at it for a second before continuing, “I live, like, five minutes away, there’s more than enough room—“

“This isn’t about room. This is—“ Remus was going to say that it was about the fact that he didn’t know Sirius, but, he found that that wasn’t what was stopping him. “This is about the fact that I, I can’t give you anything in return.”

Sirius dropped his crust onto the tray, “Did I say I was looking for payment?”

They stared at each other. Remus felt a flush creep up his neck and bit into his lip. His eyes flickered down then back to Sirius’ face, “You don’t eat the crust.”

Surprise flickered in Sirius’ eyes but his face remained strong, “No. I don’t.”

Remus kept his glare in tack, “It’s the best part.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Sirius stood, “As long as you keep in mind that it’s negative one degrees. Now,” Sirius untied his apron, and picked up his antlers, “I’m going to put these away. Then, I’m going to grab my coat, and go wait by the door. Okay?”

Remus looked stubbornly ahead of him, “You’ll be wasting your time.”

“Negative one degrees!” Sirius called over his shoulder.

And suddenly, Remus was alone again in the booth. He watched from the corner of his eyes as Sirius hung his apron up, making smalltalk with the chef. He seemed to be doing things in slow motion. He took his time folding his things, even straightening his stupid pin. Remus sat, rigid. His chest felt four times smaller than usual, filled with a strange mixture of guilt and want. This boy, Sirius, whoever he was, was warm. Remus closed his eyes. He was warm and kind. Remus had forgotten what warm and kind felt like, and now it was right in front of him. Right in front of him and about to walk out the door.

No, about to wait by the door.

Patient.

Warm, kind, and patient.

It made Remus want to cry, and smile, and let go, all at once.

Remus jumped, head whipping behind him as the bell above the door rang. He just caught a head of dark hair walking out into the darkness before the door closed and his own face was reflected back at him. He blinked at the expression on his face.

He looked terrified.

Remus turned around quickly, shrinking into the booth and breathing hard. Not so patient then. Not so kind, not so warm. God, he felt stupid. He was stupid. Pizza was one thing. Remus pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes. Sirius didn’t want him to stay. Sirius didn’t know him. Remus shook his head to himself. He was stupid. He was stupid.

The bell jingled again.

“Hey, sweater-boy.”

Remus looked up, spinning in his seat. His heart clenched.

Sirius was there, in the open doorway. His nose was pink from the cold and a hat was pulled low over his head. He wore a sweatshirt, and held what looked like a thick winter coat in his arms. Remus breathed out, shaking, relieved.

Sirius jerked his head towards the outside and grinned, “Coming? Car’s warmed up.”

Remus didn’t hesitate this time. He didn’t even think to. He got up, he smiled back, and he went.

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thatwaywardwitch

7 years ago

Oh what I would give to sleep in your arms tonight

31K notes View Post

thatwaywardwitch

7 years ago