Tess-tickles79 - MILLSAP

Graduation speech

*Points to person*: Fuck you

*Points to person*: Fuck you

*Points to person*: Fuck you

*Points to person*: Fuck you

*Points to crush*: Fuck me

*Points to person*: Fuck you

*Points to person*: Fuck you

me: *has an opinion*

me: *realizes that my opinion is a result of my limited world view*

me: *stays in my lane*

my brother tried to pick up a banana to make it look like he was talking on the phone but all the bananas in the bunch came with it and he just looked at me and went “i guess it’s a conference call”

9 Things Only Ellen Could Get Away With

1. Delivering pizza at an awards show like it’s totally normal.

2. Getting a million celebrities together to take a selfie and break the Internet.

3. Getting The President to dance on national television.

4. She can get T-Swift to wear sweaters with her and watch cat videos.

5. She can dispense advice like no one else.

6. She is never afraid, even when Jennifer Aniston tries her hardest to scare her.

7. She can convince Britney to shimmy in front of random strangers’ houses.

8. She’s always going to be herself regardless of what people say. 

9. Her haters are her motivators.

Six Lifestyles #wayoflife #daily #quotes #lifestyle #international #goodlife #advice