Synopsis: A mission's end is always an odd thing to live through, but you've found ways to manage, WARNINGS!: depiction of injury, pain, description of gun sounds and bullets. Canon-typical violence (mission) Little notes: Hurt my thumb (big typing finger for me) so if there are any errors with spelling, please don't mind This blog is still very much new to me, so if you have any little silly comments or requests for bonus stuff, send an ask! It'll make my day :) enjoy! (but only if you wanna)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- There was dust in the air, swirling like a typhoon that simply ached to consume you and all you held dear. It doesn't throw anyone off, though, you've all been trained better than that. Price's voice is in your ear again, biting out the order to "get out of there, you dolt, bomb's off in thirty seconds." It's nothing you've never heard before, you know you've cut it closer and got out fine, so you wait until you have to reload to push the button on your radio and bite back a response. "Give me ten, Cap, and I'll be clear. Stragglers." You can hear him growl under his breath, but quiet. Some part of you would smirk in satisfaction, tease the old man over knowing damn well you could pull your weight, but there isn't time for that now. You're on the clock, and it ticks much too fast The familiar, satisfying click soothes any remaining thought as you slam the gun's magazine into your thigh to push it in the rest of the way, peek out from behind your cover to unleash another spray of shots into the idiot who was trying to creep up on you. Fifteen seconds
If your ear serves you right, only one left. if you take him out in five, that leaves you ten to get out. Risky, but the odds aren't zero. Your radio buzzes back to life, but now it's the other John yapping at you, something something "Get out of there." and then your name. Johnny doesn't use your callsign, but your name. It pulls you back from the edge of bloodlust just long enough for your mental count to hit ten. "Right. Clearing out." That's all you bother with before setting on your mad dash for the exit of the decrepit concrete rectangle that is this building. West's compromised, too piled with bodies to be a safe bet for running, and East is blocked. So you run North, through unfamiliar, winding hallways, for your life. Six seconds
The thumps of your boots aren't alone. You were right, though, there's only one more soul in this nasty shit-hole. Five seconds You hear a magazine getting knocked into place, cuss to yourself and push even harder, try your damnedest to get out of this unscathed. It isn't looking good now. Four seconds A bullet tears through the wall right next to your head when you turn the corner with a resounding crack. Fuck. The thrum of adrenaline is the only thing that supports you as you continue the mad dash for the door, see it at the end of a long, straight hallway. Three seconds This is getting worse by the second, and you know it. This fucker has good aim, there's no space to zigzag or dash in a random direction like a flighty, scared animal. Two seconds Time to run the gauntlet. Glass crunches beneath the soles of worn boots, you fly through the hallway as fast as your legs will allow, silently screaming a prayer to a god you know never listens. One second
Right as you cross the doorway, there's another crack of a bullet, but it's drowned out by the bomb finally going off. The shockwave is so intense that it launches you into the air (it feels much higher than it is), and, all at once, you turn to get a look of who almost managed to put you in a box. They're all dolled up in tac gear, but you know the look in their eyes the second you spot it. It's the same determination that drives you forward, raw and feral and it's tinged by the rush of adrenaline you live for. Young, too, they couldn't be older than you were when you first joined the task force. Then, when the ceiling above them cracks and stars to come down, it's fear. Your memories of the minutes after are loose at best, but you try to piece them together. You know that, at some point, you rose to your feet, made the jog back to the evac point with that rookie's blood sprayed on the vest that caught their last bullet. It would have hit you right between the ribs. You know that Kyle wordlessly sets a cigarette between your parted lips, pulls you in by the neck to light it with his own, hazel eyes focused as he calms himself back down. You know that he's there, next to you, like always, it warms you, if only slightly. Kyle doesn't press, doesn't try to talk, but he makes a point to show you that he's there. You know that Johnny breathes out a plume of that weird vape shit he's been swearing by (it smells like a public restroom if it was mint flavored), makes a bad joke about "butt fucking" because that's what they call bumming a light in Scotland. You think his friends just picked it up from shitty American movies and lied to him. You know that, when you finally take a drag, the nicotine shocks your systems back into full function. You know that when you open your eyes again, the world is clear. You see Price trot forward and let out a breath of both annoyance and pride. He used to tear you a new one every time you pulled a stunt like this, but now he knows better, knows you operate at your best in the split second between like and death. So now, you feel his hand pat the shoulder of your vest, resigned but proud. You feel your cheeks round with a small smile when you finally pull the cig back from between you lips, finally yourself again. "Not bad, ain't it? All targets neutralized." Your voice is just a little raspier than normal, tinged with the fading of your adrenaline high. From the corner of your eye, you see Ghost, leaning on the helicopter's side. He nods. "Aye, that was feckin' pretty, ye stupid lil cunt!" Your snort seems to make Johnny beam even wider than before, you feel the warmth of his side as he pulls you into a firm, one-armed hug. Out of sheer habit, you retch jokingly, and shove him back. "Gross! You're fucking sweaty, Soap, don't muck up my good shirt!" Your 'good shirt' is torn at the bottom hem, has a fine spray of blood on it, and is half-covered in concrete dust from the former building that is now a pile of smoking rubble a few hundred meters away. It'll all come off in the wash, just like today's sins will spiral into the drain of a weird-smelling communal shower room. And you know, come tomorrow, you'll be training with your boys once more, trading quips and barbs and soaking in camaraderie. For now, that's more than enough.
Part Four
Call this shit the silly before the storm because they're getting SILLY!!!
Warnings!: The 141 will be criminally stupid, fumblers, all of them. Death (canon-typical), Violence (canon-typical), loss of limb (no, I won't tell you who yet >:), but I will cover the symptoms as well as possible) They do get kissy, but no smut (that I'm writing, but it's very much implied).
"This is Firecracker, completing final equipment check."
You can hardly keep the tremor from your voice as you grin into the radio, finally wrapping up your very first official mission on the 141.
It went just as it should have, a quick in and out, with the exception of a small gash on your thigh, an order not followed quickly enough from Price's end that left you in the hot seat. Ghost was watching your six the whole time, just like he'd promised on the fly in.
He'd said I always will, sergeant. Something in your gut squeezed when he did, but you ignored it.
Now, that skull-masked Brit sits across from you in the big belly of the helicopter–a stupidly pretty Pave Low that Nikolai was flying, as per usual–and you see the fabric rustle a little on his cheeks.
Like he's smiling.
Before you can really ponder that, or why it makes you want to see it again, Johnny is attaching himself to your side, waxing poetic about how good ye were, leannan, I knew we were right to go wie ye.
You grin wider than you would like to admit as you shove him lightly, one hand right on his waist to hold him at least a little further back, to pretend you weren't stupidly fond of him already, like he hadn't proven himself to be a wonderful teammate and... fuck, a good friend to boot.
Helping you unjam your gun, correcting your posture with a sort of gentleness you never knew you were deserving of.
Of course, thoughts of Johnny always bring thoughts of Kyle, too.
You can see him there, sitting next to Price, looking like an outside observer, like he's just passing by.
It makes you frown.
"Gaz?"
His head perks, stupidly pretty brown eyes locking onto yours without a moment of delay, always at the ready.
Goodness, you're terrible for finding him so pretty.
"Fuck're you sitting over there for? With the geezers? Did we suddenly get boring or something?"
The toothy grin you give must be enough to prevent the individual wrath of both your lieutenant and captain, because when Price gives you a look, Simon taps his thigh, just once. John huffs, but relaxes again, still looking squarely at you with something sharper than before in his eyes.
When you look away, slightly unsettled, Kyle's there beside you too, and you gladly pull him in to your little predicament with one very clingy Scotsman.
Yes, you're all grown adults. Does that make tussling in seats that should only be sat in any less fun?
Absolutely not.
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You're not exactly sure why or how you let this happen.
All you're fully aware of is that Johnny and Kyle managed to drag you out to an actual bar to celebrate.
It's a small spot, but cozy and playful, balmy in atmosphere with some temptingly good hip-hop that you don't quite recognize, but listen to anyway.
Kyle sits on the end of the booth that's pressed to the wall, Johnny on the other side. You pick the wall, get a good look at the men before you.
Johnny's wearing a nice deep red shirt, unbuttoned enough to show off the glint of dog-tags on his pale skin, and the fabric of Kyle's thick cargo pants brushes against your thigh, forcing you to swallow as you smile.
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Most of the night, the chatter is sweet, you'd be hard pressed to understand how you got here.
Something is roiling in your gut, but it's most definitely not the shot you've just knocked back, it's hotter.
Johnny's since taken up his place by your side, already flushed from how tipsy he is. You're gonna need to flag a cab home, all three of you, considering Kyle was just as blasted as the two of you, even if he's drinking you and Johnny under the table. you have no idea how he does it.
"Fuuuuucckkkkk..."
You groan as the sting of alcohol wears away to leave the bitter taste of the shot itself. It's not worth how bad your head is going to hurt tomorrow morning, but the way Kyle's looking at you is.
His eyes are terrible in the way they make you desperately try not to shiver, a beautiful brown yellowed to a lovely syrupy color in the warm lighting of the bar.
Before you do something stupid, or worse, say something stupid, you force yourself to comment on the shot instead.
"Is... is this 80 proof, Kyle?"
Your voice is tripping over itself a little, tongue slowed in your mouth until its motions are clumsy. You know he hears you, and you know he understands by how he swallows before meeting your eyes, opening his mouth to reply before he's cut off by a slightly pink Scotsman.
"Och, feckin' naughty dog, aye? Wha' do ye think we should do wie him, Firecracker?"
Johnny's breath is right against the column of your throat, teasing at the side with a warmth it has no right to have. A hot shiver grips you by the base of your spine, and you can feel your breath get caught in your throat for just a second too long.
"Johnny, you're-"
"I ken. Jus' havin' a wee bit of craic, tha's not a crime, is it?"
You're too focused on the blue-eyed menace to spot how hungrily Kyle is looking at the pair of you, the way his hand reaches out until it's holding you by the chin, gently guiding your face up to his.
"You know, you do things to people, Firecracker. He's just returning the favor."
His voice is ever so slightly lower, a little blurred by the liquor, but fuck it makes you swallow all of your pride anyway.
"Do I really?"
You're trying so hard to tease, you really are, but even you can catch how breathy you sound, and you can see Kyle's plush lips turn up at the corners, you watch him lean down until there's barely any space between your faces.
Maybe it's habit, maybe it's a mindless craving, but your head tilts to the side, and you watch him chuckle.
That's all that you can really see before there are lips on yours.
He's so warm, you can taste the sweetness of his old scotch when he parts his lips, tenderly traces his tongue on the seam of your own, like you're something to be revered, durable but deserving of good treatment.
You can feel your cheeks flame with color so fast it's nearly dizzying, every single system of your body lighting up as your gut flutters and your brain shuts itself off, focused entirely on the sensations that envelop you.
Johnny's at your back now, so very close to kissing at your neck, his breath ghosts over your pulse, and the feel of a strong body behind you makes everything double, forcing a muffled groan that Kyle eagerly swallows up before pulling away.
"Shit. Johnny was right."
Truth be told, Kyle had held his reservations about this. But having you there, flushed and hot and swollen-lipped from his kissing, he's struggling to think of any of those reasons.
Instead, he cradles your flushed face in his hands, and you spot him leaning down to peck Johnny's lips, too.
"You're gonnae be good, leannan, I cannae wait to have ye."
Johnny isn't as gentle as Kyle, you can feel his eagerness in the way his teeth catch a little against your skin before he really plans to, kissing and nibbling at your flesh as he suckles on it.
Kyle's grinning now, and he presses another kiss to the corner of your mouth, playfully licking into you with an energy that makes you want to sob.
It felt so wonderfully good. Terribly good, it makes you grip at his shirt, trying to pull him close enough to get a real kiss.
You can feel him smile against your lips, shift enough to give you what he knows you need.
It's wonderfully filthy, hot and heavy and you know you won't last much longer.
Johnny and Kyle know this, too.
First chapter | Previous chapter | Next chapter
Warnings!: The 141 will be criminally stupid, fumblers, all of them. Death (canon-typical), Violence (canon-typical), loss of limb (no, I won't tell you who yet >:), but I will cover the symptoms as well as possible) They do get kissy, but no smut (that I'm writing, but it's very much implied).
Also, bonus note for the special day!!! HAPPY NEW YEAR!! I hope none of you are reading this on release because MAN you should be having a good time right now <3
You've never been trained so hard in your whole life.
Granted, yeah, Laswell warned you it would be brutal, but this is more than brutal, this is murder.
Four miles of running, then a full round of strength training, and there was still more to do.
Maybe the only good thing about this is that, as much as you're suffering, so is everyone else.
Soap tugged you up the final wall on the obstacle course, Kyle passed you his water bottle when yours ran empty (You would have proposed right then and there, if you'd only had a ring). Ghost did this weird blinking thing once, you're not sure what it was about, but it felt reassuring to you. Price just watched.
Now, you've worked with men before (shocker), but there is one trick of their you've never been able to shake.
The playful teasing they did to rile you up, talked down like they were just a little bit better. It always worked.
Johnny figured it out remarkably fast, early in your sparring match. Kyle was sparring Ghost. Price watched over your form like you would spontaneously combust.
"Issat really all ye've got, firecracker?"
You know he's trying to tease you, you know. Still, it lights a fire under your ass like no other, makes you duck under his swing and meet it with a jab to the gut.
Johnny's a big man. That's no issue, really, but the way he stands is, rooted to the floor like a tree, too stable to just swing for the legs.
But, fortune does favor the bold.
"C'mon, rooks, let me see all that skill Laswell talked about-"
Maybe that's why, as you circle around him one more time, instead of playing it safe, chipping at his stamina until he's too tired to really fight you off, you load all your strength into your legs and launch your body into Johnny's.
It sends the pair of you crashing to the mats, and before the Scot can think any better, you're on top of him and snarling down at his stupid, mohawked face as you gather his wrists into your hands, knowing damn well the leather of your gloves is digging into tanned, sweaty skin.
"Maybe you'd still be up if you knew how to shut that big mouth of yours, MacTavish."
You don't know who's speaking, but, in that moment, you're not fully sure it's you.
It's met with a hard buck of Johnny's hips, his feet flat on the mat as he tried to dislodge you. Cheap trick, not enough to catch you off your guard.
Maybe you're some sort of inept, but you don't see the way the tips of his ears are turning a reddish color, or hear the way his breath catches in his throat like the inside of his esophagus is suddenly closing in on itself when you slam your hips back down over his, keeping him pinned to the mat in an act of sheer defiance.
"Stay down."
There is nothing more fun than being the one who calls the shots after a good spar, It's endlessly satisfying to lock your free hand around his throat, only barely squeeze down on either side.
Yeah, yeah, you've not actually strangling your co-worker, but to Johnny it must feel that way.
His breaths are ragged beneath your hand, tired to the point that he can't steady the ins and outs anymore. It makes your feral grin soften a little, to something more sympathetic.
He's also tired, you remember. He's also pretty new to this team, he's your peer now. With that thought, you don't press him for a clear submission or formal surrender, you spare his pride and stand, with his body between your legs, and offer your hand.
Johnny swallows, but he grins widely, and takes it into his own.
He's not wearing gloves, that's the single cursory note your brain makes before you realize that he's only inches away from you, smiling and looking at you with warmed, bright blue eyes, panting a little faster than before.
"Tha's... feck, yer better than I thought you'd be, Firecracker."
Johnny says it differently this time, like it's your title now, but that thought is cut by him quickly stepping away, saying a couple words to Ghost, and getting a curt nod in turn before he scurries off to where you think the bathrooms are.
Before you really have the time to question that, Kyle is at your side, offering a playful smile.
"He's right, you know. Bold, but not bad." A stupidly pretty London accent rings into your ears, makes you tense for a second before realizing who's behind you.
Maybe this is the first time you've looked at Kyle this close, but you think you know why he doesn't talk as much as Johnny.
It would be unfair to the competition.
That thought makes you shake your head, try to clear the rancid thought from your skull. Co-workers. You're gonna watch this guy kill people, don't get hot and bothered about it.
"You think so?"
"Mhm. Always good to see someone get a little gnarly. Though Soap appreciates it much more than I do, I'm sure."
It's that moment that you recognize Kyle is teasing you, when he playfully pats your shoulder with a warm hand, shuffles just a tad closer to your side and watches as a smile breaks across your face.
That's the moment when Price nods, but you don't see it. Kyle doesn't either.
First chapter | Previous chapter | Next chapter
Word count= roughly 1,750
Warnings: No! Just fluff with the lads :) Enjoy (but inly if you wanna)!!!
Kyle, who really never thought that knitting would be this hard, considering how much you raved about it keeping you both calm and properly stimulated. Now, he sits by your side on the living room floor, shakily holding two bamboo needles in his hands and trying to hold the "working yarn" (the yarn attached to the ball, apparently) the right way as you tenderly lecture him for being a dunce. "No, baby, you need to get through the stitch first before you yarn over-" Your voice is so pretty like that, trying to steer him from making another weird-looking hole for no real reason, but Kyle just whines again as you take the swatch into your own hands, finish off the whole row like some magic creature of the yarn and thread.
"You said that this was supposed to be easy, luvie." He whines into the crook of your neck, having loosely wound himself around your side as you showed him exactly what to do for the fourth time this hour. Some part of him loves the unfailing tenderness, the softness of your voice and the way you poorly hide the fact that you're laughing at him under your breath. "Sorry, i just thought-" There's a snort from your lips as giggles envelop you, your smile turns wide. Kyle's heart melts a little in his chest "I just thought you'd be better at this-"
Kyle gasps in mock offense, before pushing the needles to the floor, already planning his revenge for that little slight. "Say that one more time, and I'll give yer little magic sticks to my nieces and tell 'em they're swords." He revels in the shocked gasp you give, and grins as you bat him upside the head. "Hah, funny man. Try." Your voice is quieter, a little bit more dangerous, just daring him to do that very thing. Kyle saves his own ass by pecking your cheek, gently taking your hands into his own. "I wouldn't, babes, you know I wouldn't." There's not a modicum of lie in that statement. Kyle knows that the sweetest ones are the most terrifying, and his mum would never let him hear the end of it if he lost you. "Yeah, I do know you wouldn't, jus' wanted to mess with you." It's Kyle's turn to gasp now, but he smiles when you kiss his cheek in return, leans into you like a lapdog despite himself. Tonight's going to be good, and he knows it.
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Johnny, who remarkably managed very, very well with embroidery. You had been so happy to see him, posted on the couch next to you, working away at the hoop, having only very few questions on how he should hold the thing, if the tension you kept talking about was a little bit off. For an hour, maybe two, it was lovely. Simple silence as you leaned up on his shoulder, working a larger project as the Scot figured out exactly what he was doing on his own. Deft hands, you watched him pick apart the small knots in the thread without issue. It flooded your heart with pride. "Are you finally going to let me see the thing, Johnny?" You questioned playfully, trying to straighten your spine to get a peek before there's a big hand shoved over your eyes, and a thick accent chiding you for your gall. "No!" He squawks, you just know that he relishes in not letting you see, riling you up through your own curiosity, because Johnny is, at his core, a cheeky little shit. "Ye gotta wait, mo leannan, ye cannae jus' peek like that!" It draws a grumble from your lips, but you close your eyes, gently take hold of his wrist in your hand and nod, giving a softer affirmation before he coos at you. "Don' worry, it's almost done anyway." He soothes you with a soft peck to your temple, and just like that, you're calm again, all heart-eyed and dumb with love, relaxed. It's another thirty minutes before the finished product is tenderly set into your lap, and you gasp in surprise before seeing it. It's... stupid. An old sketch of his that really had amused him all too much, one of you from a picture at a night out (you had tripped on a root and he managed to get a picture of your face mid-fall) that he had always seemed too damn enamored with. "Oh my god." You press your hand to your face in shame, already feeling ridiculous before Johnny laughs brightly, pressed a firm, wet kiss to your cheek. "You look lovely! Don't ye? I think you look lovely." It's a sweet sentiment, enough to endear you to the terrible, terrible thing that your fiancé has chosen to immortalize and drive a too-fond sigh from your lips. "You're lucky that I love you." You grumble, giving Johnny a half-hearted glare before he swoops in to sweetly kiss your lips, because he really does know you too well. "Aye, I really am" He doesn't miss a beat, still grinning like an idiot. It makes your chest soften, your guts go mushy and fluttery. "Don't be coy, MacTavish." You reprimand. He grins, and kisses you again for good measure.
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Simon, who really didn't think this would be necessary, but here he is, sitting next to you cross-legged on the floor with the hook in hand. "Like this, right?" He speaks gruffly, and loosens his posture for you to peek over his shoulder. He feels the ghost (pun intended) of a smile pulling up at his lips when he hears your affirmative hum. "Yeah. You're doing real good, honey," Your voice wafts into his ear so nicely, floods his mind so deliciously, the only person that Simon knew he would always listen to, his angel right here on Earth. "Out of curiosity, have you ever done this before?" When you finish your question, Simon does let that smile grow on his face, lets the warmth flood into the cavity of his chest, seep into the crevices of his soul, heal the damage bit by bit. Simon leans his head on yours, and takes in a breath. The truth was, he had. One night, after a particular date when you had entirely infodumped a current project to him, he had done a little research. Then, promptly after, learned to crochet, even if it was only the basics. It paid off now, with you on his arm and impressed with his skill. "Nah. Maybe I'm just good at this, hm?" He denies that, shuffles his cheek closer into yours, soaking up the warmth that you radiate, relishes in the soft chuckle that you give. "Mmh, maybe you're gonna be even better than me, is that your plan?" Your teasing is soft, given out of affection. It makes Simon smile, makes him relieved that he's once again managed to make sure that a date went well. "No. Just pick things up fast." The mood really is dead in the water, but Simon really loves that you seem to thrive in that, that you still peck his cheek anyway despite him practically having negative game. "Smartass." You chirp at him, setting down your own piece on the floor before wholesale resting your head on Simon's shoulder. He fights a chuckle. "Better than being a dumbass, isn't it?" The joke wasn't his (he stole it from Johnny), but when you laughed, Simon knew it was well worth it anyway.
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John, who was more than content to help you work on another big project of yours. He was endlessly proud of you, how wonderfully you worked on those commissions and how perfect they always looked when you finally shipped them off. But disaster always strikes at one time or another, and the cat is often the cause of that. After maybe an hour of soothing his panicking partner, John had you wrapped up in a blanket in the corner of your own office, gently taking the needle into his own hands to sew the small tear in the fabric back together as you sniffled a little bit. Were you more than skilled enough to fix this issue yourself? Yes. But John felt particularly loving lately, wanted to make sure that his lovely, hyper-competent partner knew that they could rely on him. Because they always could. When he speaks, its gently, glancing up from the fabric in his hands to look into your eyes, still a little bit bloodshot from the tears. "Don't worry yourself, sweetheart. My mother didn't raise a man who doesn't know how to do repairs." The comfort was genuine, both an assurance of his skill and a statement that you could just lay back, let him take the reins for once and allow you to calm down a little bit. "But-" you sniffle, wipe at your nose with a tissue, and John doesn't allow you to question this. "Nope. None of that self-doubt, yer therapist already said that's bad, didn't she?" You nod, John watches your cheeks flush a bit simply because he remembered, that he cared enough to stow that away in the back corners of his brain. Oh, if only you knew how much he adores you, your little heart would blow up. "I can't just let you do my work for me, John, that's not right." The small rebuttal makes him pause in the middle of a stitch, gently set the needle down. His darling had the morals of a saint, why was he surprised by that? "Who said that I was doing your work? Maybe I'm just your guest of honor, sweetness." John speaks softly, shoots you a cocky grin that finally brings a smile back onto your face. "Yeah, yeah, alright," He smiles as you stand, wraps a strong arm around your midsection as you tuck yourself into his side, calming all of the way back down, turning back into the wonderful, sweet, bordering perfect partner returning to form once more. "That means that you have to sign it, too, you know." You tease in return as John nervously swallows, knowing damn well he is hopeless to ever replicate the pure beauty that is your signature on professional pieces. "Well, I'm not so sure about that-" He uselessly stutters to the joke, feeling his own cheeks heat up more than a little bit at the invitation. "Oh, don't be like that, I could teach you." Now that makes Price melt.
One wishes to go outdoors, to ensure their health and better their situation, it is a simple desire.
And yet, it rains.
Never really thought I would get tagged in something like this but I think it's cute, so I'll join :D.
Thanks Cheese for the tag!
last song: Little Girl Gone-Chinchilla (character inspo.) Squabble up-Kendrick Lamar (because I like it)
Favorite color: Yellow! (Specifically brighter shades, but nothing neon)
last book: Comic-The Glass Scientists. Book-World War Z. Both are great, do give them a read.
last film: School of Rock (w Jack Black).
last tv show: The oldest View (analog horror, it's on YouTube).
sweet/savoury/spicy: Savory. I love my salt fam. Mmmm, salt.
relationship status: Having a wonderful, perfect time w my partners whom I love very very much <3
last thing i googled: Amputation recovery timeline w/ prosthesis (It's for a fic I have all my limbs)
current obsession: The glass scientists. Currently learning how to pick locks with my old 8 dollar lockpicking set from Wish <3
looking forward to: Writing a couple new chapters for Watcher 1-1, opening the new cylinder lock I got :)
@loveydovey489 @laswells-ashtray (the only people I know here)
thanks @se7entyrell for the tag!
last song: spooky by dusty springfield (bc i'm on my 60s vibes shit — again)
favourite colour: any shade of blue!
last book: divine rivals, by rebeca ross (loved it! it's been a minute since i've read a book front to cover so fast)
last film: woman of the hour
last tv show: the consultant
sweet/savoury/spicy: savoury for food, bitter for drinks!
relationship status: single. forever.
last thing i googled: xo kitty season 2 date
current obsession: i've been watching any romcom that is recommended to me, old or new, good or trash.
looking forward to: start my new job, write a few more chapters for death defying acts and the tortured firefighters department, go out with my friends to celebrate
tagging: @munsonsreputation @live-love-be-unique
Warnings!: The 141 will be criminally stupid, fumblers, all of them. Death (canon-typical), Violence (canon-typical), loss of limb (no, I won't tell you who yet >:), but I will cover the symptoms as well as possible) They do get kissy, but no smut (that I'm writing, but it's very much implied).
The transport over the pond has never been a fun one, for you.
Not like you're scared of heights or anything, but it's a very long flight for your tastes, and you've never been the best at sleeping while sitting up.
Still, it elapses, and the oddly nice pilot (Nikolai, you thought his name was, though you weren't entirely sure), pats your shoulder with a smile when you step out, giving you some cryptic tease about being thankful the boys finally have someone new, a chew toy.
You're sure he's kidding, but even while you smile, it kind of unnerves you.
You'll be a hell of a lot more than a chew toy.
That spark is smothered when you see a group of four walking over the tarmac, hear the thick rubber soles of boots aggravating the landing surface. You shut your mouth immediately, straighten your back, blank your face.
The man in the front–Price–is the first to look you over, hard-eyed and stern as crystal blue eyes look beneath your skin with the strength of diamond behind them, like he's peering at every single part that makes you up, taking them apart and putting them together to see what ticks and how to break each one.
It's nauseating, especially when it comes from four sets at once.
The lieutenant is almost worse, wordless, blank eyes beneath a crude skull-bearing mask, a gaze that makes you think he's waiting to see you take some damage, to watch you snap like the fragile wings of a bird in his cruel hands.
You can't put words to how the sergeants are looking at you before Price speaks to you, making your head to snap to his the second he starts.
"You're Laswell's recommendation?"
He sounds almost... unimpressed, and it makes you straighten, puff out your chest like a rookie would. He thinks you're too green. you have to prove him wrong.
"Yes, captain."
Your voice is a bit deeper than normal, in your nervousness, but it doesn't sound unnatural. You see Kyle–the second sergeant–look away from Price for only a second, and you see him swallow.
The confirmation is met with nothing but a grunt at first, then he turns.
"On me. I need to make sure you're not as green as you look."
MacTavish chuckles, makes that weird "ooh" noise like a schoolboy.
"Training day, huh sir?" He's peering at Kyle as he says that, like he's trying to tease the other sergeant. Garrick doesn't look at him, pointedly.
Price nods, and they all fall into step behind him, making you jog to keep up.
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I know I'm (very) late, I just forgot how to write and lost any and all motivation for a lil while.
Warnings!: Fluffy fluff, sickeningly soft. Polyamory and awkward conversations. If you want a song for mood, "luther" by Kendrick Lamar and SZA is what I was listening for the entirety of writing this.
Nightmares are common among people of your station.
The SAS is no easy place to be, and sometimes... viciousness is a gruesome requirement of work.
That being said, the fear is a good reminder. The breaths you swallow, greedy for air and sweating a little, remind you that you are human. You are a being of feeling, despite what you've done.
What you feel is not fear. For a few moments, it is a blind panic, but that settles quickly. No, what overtakes you after is a mild annoyance with your mind's need to pull a fast one on you mid-sleep.
"That was just unnecessary, really."
You speak into the comfortable darkness of your small room, hearing your own voice crack as it warms back to life again.
Music smoothes your nerves over as you pull yourself up and our of bed, into the kitchen to fill a cup of water and sip it.
You know you're not alone long before Simon steps in, and you still.
Right as he crosses the barrier, you speak.
"Hey, Lt."
He doesn't flinch, but you grin as you hear his breath catch in his throat, followed narrowly by a grumble.
"You."
He croaks back, a little too fond in the voice to be normal. This means one of two things: He had a really bad nightmare, or you'll have to deal with the rain of fire and the end of days.
The way you tilt your head when you look at him, curious in the same way as one of those parrots that just won't shut up makes Simon chuckle to himself.
God, he has a type. Dammit.
"Got a question?"
He asks, stealing the glass with your water before taking a sip, and then another, smirking to himself as you sputter with a tamed, playful sort of indignation.
"Most of them are why you're so fond o' stealin' my shit."
If you only know what you've stolen from him. You'd die of embarrassment.
"S' alright. I can pay you back."
Your eyebrow raises, but Simon reaches into the pocket of his sweatpants to produce a small trinket for you. It's a simple puzzle, the sort he's seen you collecting for months now.
Five aluminum parts, unassembled.
He doesn't even let you see how they should fit together. Gives you the challenge.
"Why?"
He shrugs, taking one more sip of your water before setting it back down, finding his voice more functional than it usually is in the mornings.
"Check the calendar, I'm going back to sleep."
"Sure."
You're a little too focused on the metallic pieces to check immediately, and you hear Simon padding off as you rotate two in just the right way, slotting them together with a gratifying click.
You realize what day it is right as his door quietly shuts somewhere down the hall.
Oh.
Fuck.
always wanted to make one of these myself, so here's the propaganda blorbos!
+ one(1) ✨vintage✨ ghoap
part two of ???
Part Eight
Warnings!: The 141 will be criminally stupid, fumblers, all of them. Death (canon-typical), Violence (canon-typical), loss of limb (I will cover the symptoms as well as possible, but any and all corrections are welcome) They do get kissy, but no smut (that I'm writing, but it's very much implied).
Warnings for this specific chapter: Clear depiction of severe emotional distress, a very strongly-worded recommendation of transfer that will be heavy. If requested, I will section it off and add a TLDR, but it is very plot relevant.
Days seem to pass much faster when you have things to do with your time.
Wheeling around in your new chair. Learning how to switch from your chair to your bed to the toilet. Finally getting the dignity of tossing your bedpan in the biohazard bin, blasted thing.
Slowly, the inner workings of the simple lock Keegan gifted you have become a second home to your (formerly) achingly empty hands.
It's become your latest single-minded obsession, even if the tools are frankly, garbage and the lock is now your single closest companion. Maybe second to Keegan.
Speaking of, the man himself gently interrupts you halfway through another round of single-pin picking, gently tugging your reddened thumbs into his much less callused hands, frowning at you as he gently pries the lock from your fingers, pick still in the keyway.
"Jeez, hun."
The gentle tangling of fingers is what follows, as Keegan horsed around in his pockets for at least a minute, silently swearing at his own clothes until he produces a small band-aid and some ointment for your not-even-broken skin.
"You know, you're not going to need to use-"
"Shut up. You're hurtin' yourself."
His voice is just a little more firm, and, for just a second, you're quiet, and it makes the nurse seemingly regret the words and correct himself.
"I'm sorry, that was-"
At that singular second, you simply have to say otherwise, you've got to tell him that no, he didn't upset you, he never would. He couldn't ever do that, not to you. Never.
"No."
The force in your voice is the thing that makes him pause. Truth be told, it also surprises you.
"N-I- I'm not mad with you. Not with you, never. I would never be mad with you for trying to help me."
The blue eyes that look into yours make you weak. Uncomfortably so. You shouldn't be this weak, you should be strong. This time, not for your own interest. This time, it's for Keegan's.
He deserves someone who can keep themself in check.
You aren't fully sure how much time passes while you're staring into those endless pools of blue, or what exactly the man before you is thinking, until the tender wrappings of his accented voice are flooding back into your ears.
"Do you know what it is that you do to me? By being the person that you are?"
Oh.
Oh, dear. The way your cheeks are hot is not something you had been accounting for. This was not planned.
"Keegan-"
"No, no, listen."
You do. Dammit, you listen to him. You finally abandon your pride and look at him, really look at him, and see the single most daunting sight you ever have.
That is a man who is devoted. And it is scary, but not in the way you expect it to be. Because this look is not familiar to you. It is new and it is potent. It makes your chest ache in a way that makes everything in your body stutter before it starts chugging again.
"I'm going to put on the ointment. And I'm going to put the bandage on your finger, alright? And then, I will ask if I'm allowed to kiss you, because I really want to."
Your body is getting ever more fuzzy and hot and wiggly in all the ways you hate but cannot ignore. Your heart is pounding. Your mind is reeling. You know this feeling, but you don't want to admit it.
"Alright."
It feels disingenuous. You feel terrible, like you're lacking every ounce of vulnerability that Keegan offers to you. Like you're taking and not giving back.
He smiles, just a little. Only a little bit, it's a simple twitch of his lips upward, and you catch it.
"Good."
Keegan's hands are efficient, but you've seen him practice sutures and the like in front of you, and you see him nearly slip as he wraps the raw skin of your thumb in the fabric bandage. He's going faster than usual.
"You're rushing."
"Yeah, well, I really wanna kiss you."
Thank goodness that he isn't looking for the blush on the cheeks or the way your eyes are a little bit wider than they usually are. Keegan chuckles, and gently holds your callused, scarred hands in his own.
"You know you don't have to. You can say no. I'll never ask again."
You're still sitting there, one leg down and actively trying to start your brain back up again. No one's ever said something like that to you before. Sure, it was always implied, always written in little letters between the lines, but Keegan seems incredibly willing to just... give that power over to you.
You seemingly don't answer fast enough, and the nurse slowly eases himself back, out of your space.
This kicks off what you can only describe as a panic response.
Your arm moves so fast it bumps the lock to the floor, but that does little to deter you. Your hand finds short-cropped, dark hair, and pulls the nurse forward until your lips are crushed together.
It isn't gentle. It's not what someone like Keegan deserves, and you cringe when your teeth clack just a little in your desperation.
"I'm sorry."
Are the first words out of your mouth when you pull back just enough to say them, bashful and flustered that you'd been so easily picked apart by any odd nurse who bothered to really pursue you.
His grin is wide and boyish, even if his lips (chapstick-moisturized, you noted in that desperate second) are a little shiny with spit.
"Don't be."
The peck that follows might be the single best thing that's ever happened to you.
Two big, gentle hands are holding your face, stroking your hot cheeks like he's soothing a bird fresh from the cage, taking your frayed nerves and twisting them back together.
A quiet noise comes from your throat, though its foundation isn't immediate pleasure, not like it used to be. It's a grateful contentment, quiet and almost unstated except for that.
Keegan smiles against your mouth, and kisses you again. Not any harder, or deeper, or any of those bullshit words that say he wants any more. Just the same, almost loving press that is quickly lowering any of the remaining walls that surround your too-fragile heart.
You have no idea how he's done this. You don't want him to stop.
Unfortunately, a very familiar clearing of the throat sounds from the doorway. A voice you know, well.
"Glad to see you're making friends."
Laswell. Fuck.
Keegan is quick to efficiently end the short coupling of your mouths, and look up to the woman, sheepish.
"Real good friends, ma'am."
You should smack him for that, but some part of you that has become frustratingly understanding knows what it is he's doing. Taking her attention from you, funneling it into that stupid joke and hoping she'll have mercy on your pathetic ass.
It's admirable, and Laswell must catch the way you look at him, because she just sighs.
"Yes, well, you can kiss later. I have things to discuss with my soldier, so it really would be great if you-"
Keegan hauls ass. The door is shut before she can even finish talking, and Laswell shakes her head in a way that seems less disappointed and more... amused, almost.
"That settles that."
She sits in the chair next to your bed. You turn to face her, stump forward and leg folded over the edge of the terribly uncomfortable surface.
You watch her glance down, in sympathy or in pity, you're not sure.
"I'm on pain meds."
Her brows pinch, and she lets her head drop a little. Like she doesn't like what she's about to say to you.
"I know, peanut. I'd have everyone here out for malpractice if you weren't the closest to fine you could be. Just- God, this is a mixed bag."
You raise a brow, and she starts to elaborate.
"I've talked to doctors. Odds are, you can go back into the field, if you want to. If everything goes well, you could probably pass selection for the SAS or Special Forces again."
The smile that you hold is tempered by the fact that she doesn't look overjoyed by this. No, she still looks upset somehow. But you also know Laswell doesn't lie. At least, not to you.
"Something is wrong. And you don't want to tell me what it is."
She sighs, and pinches the bridge of her nose. Not out of annoyance, but some sort of empathy.
"No. I really don't want to, but I've held it back for too long already, and I know you'd like it if I came clean."
You nod, after a brief hesitation.
"You've been transferred out of the 141."
She lays it out there, plain and simple, and you're silent.
It makes so many hurtful things click. The emptiness of the small counter next to your bed. The reason none of your teammates have come to visit, why you haven't even gotten calls.
Because you really are a liability. Too slow, and now one leg down on the competition.
Laswell pipes up before the pain can entirely take you over, pulling your mind from the rapid downward spiral it was gearing up to take.
"I want to tell you now, that I read the letter that recommended the transfer. It was a load of shit, and I hate all of it. But, it got the brass on board anyway."
"I... also want to tell you that, for your own good, I'd steer clear of talking to any of the boys for a time." She gently sets your phone on the small "nightstand" beside your bed, again, almost hesitantly.
"They're a bit... heated, right now. Last I heard."
You can't talk. Or, if you can, you really don't want to. Your throat feels tight, and your eyes feel hot, and it's all too much. But you look up at her anyway, and she tried to give you the closest thing to a smile she can muster.
"Take your time, alright? You've always been a good soldier. Better than people think."
Laswell stands, then. You do nothing to stop her as she leaves the room, but you hear what she says to Keegan at the door.
"I don't know you, but they clearly do. Don't do something they don't deserve."
The instructions ring through your hollowed skull as you look toward the linoleum floor in front of you, and see the lock.
The fall must have bumped it just right, because it's open. This time, the pick looks like its stabbing into the cast-iron body.
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I've been mean to y'all. Too much angst. Take some fluff for the winter (me having a test this week)
Warnings!: Wisdom tooth removal. Bloody spit, at one point reader is in enough pain to verbally request an opioid pill. Pain and pain medication. Fluffy <3 prob leads up to poly, they're fruitcakes about it.
The SAS teams have had to pause ops for a wide, wide range of reasons. The odd health complication is very much among them.
That being said, Price never thought he would have to pause a mission because one of his star players got a wisdom tooth infected.
You had been off on Tuesday, chewing on only one side of your mouth and not drinking anything that was even a little hotter than room temp.
Kyle gave you funny looks for it, but that was all.
Wednesday, you didn't leave your room for much at all, but that was fine. Resting up before an op wasn't uncommon. Simon did it all the time.
However, at some point between you disappearing and Johnny saying he heard crying from your room all bets were off.
The door was kicked in, to reveal a grown sergeant, teary-eyed and crying a little as they clutched their cheek with a hand.
Kyle was already at your side, trying to coax you to open your mouth for some painkillers. It wasn't working well.
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You cried a little before the surgery. Maybe out of nervousness, maybe out of pain, but the nice nurse was kind enough to ignore it as she explained that you would be waking up in a few hours down four whole teeth.
She explained it to you as you sat in the stupid fucking chair, she repeated it as she gently tucked a I.V. with a small blister containing medicine into the veins of your arm.
"Alright, first the anti-anxiety drug will be administered, okay?"
She doesn't wait for your confirmation, but gently pats your shoulder and continues.
"You should start to feel a bit fuzzy, then, you'll sleep."
It takes a few sickening seconds for you to actually feel the drugs kicking in. You want to get out of this chair, to scream at something.
You never liked the dentist.
But then... the world starts to fade out. It's like you're being locked out of your body as your mind turns itself off.
You hear her counting with the surgeon–a much more awkward woman, though no less polite.
Three.
Two.
On-
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The waking up is slow, and messy.
Cotton pads lie in either of your cheeks, and you can't do much but oblige as the nurse gently coaxes you into a wheelchair, giving instructions to the bearded man who's standing in the corner.
"Make sure they don't sleep for at least a couple hours, okay? I know it'll be hard, but try to have them keep pressure on the site."
"Yes, ma'am."
"Remember the usual course, and we're also giving you five opioid pills. Only in case it gets really bad."
"Affirmative."
You know this voice, but when you see the boonie hat and the slightly furrowed brows, a spark of muffled recognition fires off beneath the haze of anesthetic and misery.
"...Old man."
Your voice is slurred, foreign to even you at this point, but he seems to know it, because he sighs frustratedly before taking the chair by the handles and steering your down the hallway out.
"I swear to- mgh, olright. Better than Soap at least."
You're loaded into the back seat of the car with the most basic consideration.
Dumped in like a sack of flour, actually. Your butt hurts now, but there's Kyle.
He snorts when he sees you, reaches forward to wipe whatever is dripping from the corner of your mouth.
It's bloody spit, but he doesn't seem surprised.
The car ride back to base is quiet, but Kyle keeps you awake.
Beyond that, there's nothing you can remember. Not till the next morning.
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Johnny is perched at your bedside, scrolling through his phone until he sees your eyes blearily opening, hears your groaning as you recognize a new pain in your cheeks, and he gently coaxes your mouth open to take out the bloody gauze.
"Och, there ye are, bonnie wee thing. You look like an eejit, just thought ye needed to know."
Your tired glare is met with a laugh, but followed shortly by a pat to the shoulder.
"A'hm kiddin', leannan. Just jokin' with ye. Brought ye breakfast."
He holds up a small container of yogurt, shakes it like one would cat treats to entice a stray. You grimace as much as your painfully swollen cheeks allow, but when you open your mouth to tell him off, there's a sharp twinge that makes you close it.
This seems to earn Johnny's sympathies, because he gently guides you so you're sitting up on the bed, holding one of your shaky hands as he peels back the foil on the cup.
"Easy. Still fresh, aye?"
Your wet-eyed nod is met with a sympathetic huff.
"Aye. Dinnae fash. I'll help ye."
You should smack him for implying that you need help eating yogurt, of all things, but... you kind of do need the help.
Your body is still lethargic, sluggishly stumbling through its tasks with hazy edges and poor motor control.
He raises a glass of water to your lips, and has you take a few sips.
Breakfast takes a long time, but before you fall asleep again, he gently sets a painkiller in your mouth, and tells you to swallow.
When you do, he smiles, and bends down to kiss your forehead while you drift back off.
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So, here's something you didn't know before getting your wisdom teeth out.
You can't swallow for a couple days.
It's gross, yeah, but you're supposed to drool out the bloody spit in your mouth, so you don't get dry socket.
Thankfully, Kyle is there for this.
He sweeps your hair back as much as possible (to the point of getting bobby pins from the corner store for the baby hairs), and rubs your back as you drool out your toothpaste.
"I feel disgusting."
"I know, luv. You're not gonna feel good for a while."
Still, his mother's cure is the only thing he trusts himself enough to use on you. Warm, salty water. A childhood staple.
He's sympathetic to your plights, rubbing your back again as you clumsily swish it by turning your head to the sides, cheeks too swollen to move properly.
"Good job. One more."
A firm, warm hand pats your back again as you "spit" (if you can even call it that) for the final time, offering a sweet smile just for you.
"Perfect. Now you can lay back again, yeah? Nice n' easy."
You're not suffering like you were yesterday. It's new.
Your motor function is back, just sluggish.
No, no, your biggest issue right now is the swelling. Your cheeks were so puffy it hurt, and you had them on ice as often as you could.
This is where you have to thank the lord for John Price. Your captain, distant as he can be, must have at least three sets of cheek-size ice pads, because every time you come into your room, there's a new, fresh set waiting for you.
Kyle gently guides you to sit in your bed, offering a sympathetic smile as he eases you backward until you hit the pillow-ramp Johnny had built so your head would be upright.
"You wanna sleep, luv?"
"No."
Your voice is still quiet, limited by your stupid cheeks, but he smiles anyway, and sits next to you.
"You wanna hang out, then?"
"Yes."
The afternoon is good, for you.
Kyle is there. The whole time.
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Of course, every surgery comes with the odd fuck-up.
No one should be up, but you're going insane with pain.
It's a sharp, stabbing thing, focused in the gum of your lower right jaw. Almost as sharp as the tooth's initial infection, but more than enough to bring significant distress.
Simon is an odd man, and you two have never been the closest, but when he opens your door in a t-shirt and boxers, you don't even care a little bit.
"Wha's happenin'?"
The Mancunian gruffs concernedly at you, watching as you hold your cheek and shakily take in vain breath in the hopes of calming yourself.
"Get an opioid, Lt. Please."
"Fawk."
Right after that, he's off like a horse to the races, and you're in the silence again, holding your cheek as you try to ignore the way your eyes swim with tears that you refuse to shed.
It's a mercifully short two minutes, even if it feels like half an hour.
Simon's hands are gentle, opening your jaw and setting the horse-pill on your tongue, looking into your wet eyes as he raises the glass to your lips.
"I know, I know. Jus' swallow."
He stays with you as you pant for the breath you've lost, wide, scarred hands on your shoulders.
He exaggerates his own breathing so you see the clear rise and fall of his chest. His lips lose their frown as you slowly start to mimic it.
The dispersal of the pain med is fast, thank goodness, but then Simon has a tired you to deal with, still trembling in the fingers from the sudden spike of debilitating pain, though you can't feel it.
"Are those skeleton boxers?"
He's starting to think your favorite pastime is asking stupid fucking questions, but still, some part of him feels relief.
You could have asked about the lack of mask, but you didn't. You just wanted to know about the halloween boxers.
"Sergeant."
His voice isn't as firm as it should be, but when he sees your exhausted look, he still sits down on the mattress with you.
"Stay. Jus' till I fall asleep."
You don't have the balls to ask for it. Not when you're this vulnerable. So you treat it like an order.
Simon won't be chewing you out for it.
Not now.
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Kyle and Johnny stand in the doorway to your room, snickering to themselves.
Never thought they would see big boy Lt with the firecracker that drove him up the wall, surely.
Still, after taking a couple pictures (blackmail for Johnny, photo album for Kyle), they just... stand and stare a little.
"Ye ken... we could jus'... join in?"
Johnny poses the question. Kyle nods.
"Yeah. To make sure they're sleeping well."
They both know damn well that's not why. But fuck it, a cuddle pile never hurt anyone.
Especially not you, considering how gentle the pair are when maneuvering your sleeping form.
If Simon opened his eyes and just so happened to see this buffoonery in action, he closed them right back up after.
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Price sighs in exasperation when he sees it, but smiles as he tips down his cap just a little.
"Fuckin' rookie. Gonna be the death of me."
But he knows you won't. Because he sees the way Simon's lips curve up in sleep, or the way Johnny and Kyle cling to you.
He should call Laswell, finalize your placement.
The boys wouldn't complain.
Follow if you want the musings of my decaying mind.Updates Fridays (mostly afternoon) and weekends, if you want extra details on what/when, feel free to send in an ask!
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