Middle School Bkdk Anthem, For Izuku Specifically

asenora, is it "shit" or "shite" that'd be the go-to for british teenagers in the 90s ;-; ?

this is basically my greatest fic-writing struggle rn, i speak american eng and have alr given in to the irresistible pull of "holy shit" (the phrase "holy shite" made my eyes water) and "bullshit" + am currently holding myself back by a Thread from "dogshit" (it's a ron pov and i just KNOW he'd overuse this if it was a part of his vocab)

my advice to american authors is to exclusively use "shit".

"shite" is used in ways which don't quite work by non-british/non-irish writers almost every time i see it, to be honest.

and the reason is that it's actually surprisingly complicated for such a little word. it's not an entirely straightforward synonym for "shit" - the usage heavily depends on context and the context heavily depends on things like regional dialect and factors [such as social class] which are often intertwined with it.

for example, in some parts of mainland britain "shite" is considered milder/more jovial than "shit"... so describing a film as "complete shite" is saying that it was so bad it was good and you enjoyed it, and saying "oh shite, i'm late" means you'll have to rush but you'll be fine.

in others, however, it would come across as stronger than "shit" - and so you'd be saying that you hated the film and had a terrible time, and that you're going to miss your plane.

"shit" - in contrast - means "shit". context clues can fill in how strongly it should be taken.

[my other profanity-related advice to american authors is to take however much swearing you think the characters would do and quadruple it...]

draco @ harry & mione as they're having a mild disagreement, post dron-relationship-reveal:

(ron is watching the interaction like a hawk and gives draco approving shoulder-pats for his self-restraint)

[James and Regulus making out]

Sirius, walking in: Hey Prongs— Wh—

Sirius, yelling: Get your hands off my brother you fuck!

James: [raises hands]

Sirius: Now, what the the actual hell is—

Regulus: [also raises hands]

Sirius: Why the fuck are YOUR hands up, Reg

Regulus: I—

Regulus: I didn’t know which brother you meant

I learned recently, while researching gaslighting, that there is a second type called ‘Emotional gaslighting’. This is when your abusers deny the reality of your feelings. 'You’re too sensitive’, 'It wasn’t that bad’, 'You’re just faking it for attention’, 'Stop acting like you’re hurt’ 'Come on, it didn’t hurt you’ 'You’re overreacting!’ 'You’re fine, stop exaggerating’, these phrases deny your own feelings to you. They communicate to you that not only the abuser doesn’t believe you’re experiencing pain, they’re demanding you to pretend that you aren’t. They’re asking you to deny your reality and to pretend it’s not real.

This will make you feel like you’re not allowed to feel your own emotions, and you’ll end up questioning if any of your emotion is real or are you faking it? Are you justified in feeling what you do? Are your feelings of pain and terror really just an exaggeration that doesn’t have a basis in reality? Are you making up your own suffering? Is all this pain in your head only?

This, again, will cause you to feel like you’re going insane, and doubt your every reaction to any event, you’ll try to see if thru someone else’s eyes you would be perceived as 'reasonable’ for having a reaction that you do, and it will drive you insane trying to figure out what are the 'correct’ responses while all you feel is shame, anxiety, pain and desperation.

This illusion falls apart when you realize that all 'correct’ responses are only those convenient to your abuser, and that somehow, your every positive and obedient reaction to them is 'correct’, while justified upset and pain at their abuse is 'wrong and forbidden’. So somehow you’ve been reacting to everything right, except the abuse. Somehow, your every thought and feeling needs to be convenient to them or it’s wrong. That’s how you know it’s only a self-serving game they’re playing, and all your emotions were correct all along, as there’s no way for you to 'feel’ wrong. All your pain is still their fault, and not your fault for 'feeling it’, and things are exactly as bad as you feel them. Your feelings are a reflection of reality that is happening to you, if there was no cause of you feeling upset and pained, you would not be feeling it.  

i had to cut a knot out of my cat’s fur. for the first time in his life, in the ten years i have known him, he put his teeth on my hand, gently, a warning, telling me i was hurting him but unwilling to let that message sink in. 

i wonder how many people i have hurt worse than my cat hurt me. how many hands were trying to help me that i turned and devoured. i was so angry, so often, bristling with so many tangles that no knife could slit open. people who loved me tried everything and i snarled at them. how hurt i was when they were angry i was acting out of order. i would find out later their anger at my behavior was just because they were scared to death i was going to explode and they’d lose me and it came out looking angry.

i wish i could be like my cat. to warn that i was in pain, gently. to only lash out with the littlest of teeth. to know that sometimes what looks like an attack is actually a sign of love. but i only know claws, and using the fullest force of my venom to hurt others when they never meant to hurt me. i know logically sometimes there’s pain to pull the glass out. but i can’t stop myself from reacting.

they both do this to each other btw, draco even started it. in his mind ron occupies a space scarily adjacent to beloved little pet.

draco, mentally, while stroking ron's hair: i've always wanted a puppy.

"It worried Ron sometimes, and the uncomfortable, hard edge of it pressed up against his side even when he wasn't-- that Draco only kept agreeing to these meetings not (only) out of obligation, but because he viewed him as some petty form of entertainment. A talking, dancing monkey in a long line of dancing monkeys, that he deigned to wave a hand at and let amuse him after he grew bored, of-- of swimming in a massive pool filled to the brim with his own Galleons, or whatever it is rich bastards did in their free time.

hell, the way he looked at him sometimes, undeniably fond, but exactly in the way you'd look at a pet that just did something cute-- the way he put his hands on him, how he liked to curl one around the back of his neck to prompt Ron to look up at him, then thread it in his hair and keep it there, proprietary."

draco is incredibly touch starved, obviously (we're going off of pure canon where it's clear he has no real friends, and his parents aren't exactly . . huggers), and so what ends up happening eventually is that ron just takes to petting him like he's a damn dog:

i'd like to highlight specially the scenes above where ppl just freaking, rub a hand over the entirety of will's face, bc first off wth, and second off draco would LIVE for that shit he is so pathetic wet car.

and they cuddle. obviously. draco is clingy asf. as they bond he takes to standing with his arm around ron's waist whenever they're next to each other, specifically bc ron's taller and he thinks thats awesome, actually

My brother cracked my rib one morning and gave me half of his orange in the evening.

I remember being younger and sometimes wishing to be a single child, to have all the attention and gifts and time but when he was away from home for the first time, I remember crying and stroking his side of the sofa as if blurting out my first wish- for him to be home, without thinking twice, without a shadow of doubt. Even the genie cried. Growing up with a sibling is like being the only people on a stranded boat, constantly figuring out how you can live with them and questioning how you could ever live without them.

One evening, in a fit of anger, I told him how I never wanted him to be my brother and he yelled that he didn't ask for it either. The air smelled like kerosene and my chest was filled with arsenic. I was raging and threw his favorite toy aeroplane down the window, 7 stories of guilt and shame. He cried all night and I wanted to cut off my right hand, the hand that hurt my baby brother. I didn't know if he was ever going to forgive me or even talk to me. The next morning at breakfast, he didn't look at me or say a word, I felt like my chest was about to explode and guilt clouded my vision. But then, I felt a hand quietly holding half of an orange my way.

The only people on a stranded boat. How do you live with them? How could you ever live without them?

-Ritika Jyala, excerpt from The world is a sphere of ice and our hands are made of fire

reblog if you’re real tired of getting hurt and would like to file a complaint

dragging myself thru a fic with Ron Bashing bc it's not too bad otherwise, but the entire Extremely Warped Personality to the Point of OOC, ordeal . . . is making me feel like a war veteran reliving my comrade being butchered to death right in front of me

ideal ship dynamic: autism x the most severe psychological issues you've ever seen on a person