I Have To Stop Going There (the Alternate World In My Head)

Sometimes I want to pull out my hair and scream through my chest and go back to my primal instincts of raw savagery, because I don't have the words to describe how beautiful she is and no camera can ever justify her worth. If only she could see...

There's a sort of goodbye that comes with 17.

All questions of 'who do you want to be when you grow up' turn to 'who are you becoming now?' 17 is young, 17 is old. It's everything you wanted. It's everything you despised. It's messy and ruthless and full of grief at times. And 17 is scary as hell because now you know that you finally have to say goodbye to childhood.

-Ritika Jyala, excerpt from The Flesh I Burned (source)

As I kid, I wanted to be a savior, trailblazer, the prophecy child. I wanted a big life, with ups and ups like the breasts of mountains and lows like the depths of valleys full of forgotten debris. I was convinced the great flood was knocking at my door, beckoning me to become someone bigger. A juvenile fantasy, a hazy dream.

I'm 19 now. It's not a grand big life, I'm no hero. I love my friends and sunday mornings. I like cats and strawberries. No flood, no rapture, no calamity- just quiet weekdays and sleepy weekends. But oh my days, I am full, finally.

-Ritika Jyala, excerpt from The Flesh I Burned

— Speaking Tree, Joy Harjo

[text ID: I carry a yearning I cannot bear alone in the dark—]

Søren Kierkegaard, Diaries 1813-1855

I love those friends that get angrier abt situations you’re in than you do

i don't pay attention to the world ending. it has ended for me many times and began again in the morning.

― Nayyirah Waheed, Salt

T.S. Eliot, The Wasteland.

literally all I do is daydream about impossible scenarios

casually losing my mind over the intimacy of good morning text messages