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Homeschooling Help: How Parents Can Teach Sex Education While COVID-19 Keeps Families at Home

Now that schools around the country have closed due to the new coronavirus (or COVID-19) pandemic, parents and caregivers are being asked to take a MUCH more active role in their children’s education. 

We’re here to show you how to be your kid’s go-to resource for answers and advice on bodies, sex, sexuality, gender, relationships, consent, and more — from pre-K through high school. Here’s our top 5 tips from the Planned Parenthood experts. 

Incorporate Learning Into Daily Activities

Not all sex education needs to be formal. There’s a lot to be learned from TV, books, and other media around the house.

Use storylines from TV and movies to spark honest conversations with your kids. 

While you’re watching a TV show or movie together, play Healthy Relationships Bingo. Compare which boxes you check off and talk about what’s similar and different.

Follow our TV watching guide and pause the program at key scenes to ask what your kid thinks. This could include when you see romance, sexual activity, pregnancy, peer pressure, or sexting.

After you watch something, discuss the relationships in it. Is the sexual activity consensual? Are the relationships healthy? Are characters communicating clearly and assertively with each other? Who is and is not getting represented (i.e. are there LGBTQ characters/relationships, a diversity of race/ethnicities), and how are they being represented? Ask their opinions and share your own as well.

Read together, and use stories to spark conversations. 

Reading together can look a lot of different ways: You can read a children’s book to your kid, read a short story over their shoulder, or read the same book on your own, checking in after each chapter.

After reading, discuss the characters and storylines, asking their opinions and sharing yours. You can use the same questions suggested above in the TV and movies section. When it comes to consent and healthy relationships, you can share messages like these to help your kids better understand these topics. 

Get Formal: Plan a Time and Set a Place

If you’re homeschooling on a more formal schedule, it’s helpful to have time set aside for sex education at the same times and in the same part of your home. 

 Keep in mind that even if your local school has implemented an online learning program, it might not include the vital sex education your child needs. You can ask your kid what subjects are being covered to help guide you in what you may want to supplement.

First Step: Do Your Homework

Watch our videos for parents (también en español) and read through plannedparenthood.org/parents to help prepare you. These videos help you tackle important topics in age-appropriate ways, from preschool to high school. Topics include gender identity, healthy relationships, porn, and more. Choose a topic that you’d like to start with and set a time to dig into it.

Activities: Using Educational Videos

You know your kids. If they’re visual learners, then watch these educational videos together: 

For high school-aged teens:

Consent 101 Videos: This four-video series is all about consent — what it is, how to know if someone wants to have sex with you, and what to do if they don’t. We also have a lesson plan you can pick up and use along with the videos.

STD Communication Videos: This three-video series models how to have conversations about safer sex, STD testing, and being honest about your status. We also have a lesson plan you can pick up and use along with the videos.

Sexual and Reproductive Health (también en español): These 16 short videos give you the basics on birth control, how pregnancy happens, abortion, and more. 

For middle school-aged kids:

AMAZE Videos: AMAZE has a whole bunch of sex education videos for tweens and younger teens that you can watch together and discuss. They also have resources for parents and educators on how to use the videos with kids. 

Activity: Digital Education Tools

If you’re looking for some interactive activities for your middle- or high school-aged teen to help them think through preventing unintended pregnancy and STDs, we’ve got plenty for you! Our games for teens are interactive and based on science, helping them think through decision making around things like peer pressure, deciding when they’re ready to have sex, and using birth control and condoms to prevent both unintended pregnancy and STDs. We also have some lesson plans you can use towards the bottom of this page that go along with some of the games!

Activity: Start a Conversation Whether it’s a follow-up to one of those educational videos or bringing up another topic that’s important to you, it’s essential to get the conversation going. Don’t worry — you don’t need to be an expert. You just need to be willing to talk AND listen. 

Once you’ve talked it out, use what you discussed to inform your next topic. Research tells us that kids and teens who have regular conversations with their parents and caregivers about sex and relationships are less likely to take risks with their sexual health, and more likely to be healthy and safe. So keep the conversation going!

Give an Assignment: Something to Read or Watch On Their Own

Some children thrive in group learning environments, and others flex their learning muscles better on their own. If you know your kid works better independently, support that. And if they learn best by taking in new information slowly, give them time to process. 

Books and activities: Check out the sex education word find and books for children on this resource page. Pick one of the resources, let your child engage with it on their own, and encourage them to ask you questions.

Videos: If you watch one of the videos above and feel that it’s appropriate for your child to watch by themselves, then share it with them. If you have tweens or teens, send them to our Roo High School video series or AMAZE. And if you have younger children, try Amaze Jr.’s videos for kids 4 years old and up. 

PlannedParenthood.org/Teens: We have a whole section on our website just for teens! You can pick sections for them to read through, and then talk about them together later.

COVID-19 on the Planned Parenthood website: If you have an older teen who has questions or concerns about COVID-19, they can read our COVID-19/New Coronavirus website — particularly the page on ways to protect your sexual health while protecting yourself from COVID-19. 

Seize the Opportunity: When Issues Come Up, Use Them as Teachable Moments

With more time at home, you may find that your kid is asking you more questions about all kinds of things, including bodies, sex, and relationships. And while you’re spending more time with your kids, you may notice more things about their physical and emotional development — like their romantic interests, social media habits, or changing body. 

These little experiences throughout the day are great teachable moments. You can use these moments as opportunities to ask questions and share your values. AMAZE’s Askable Parent Challenge can help you navigate your kid’s questions and your own observations while we all adjust to social distancing.

If your child responds to more downtime by exploring their own body and discovering masturbation, this article has tips for parents on what to do (mainly: relax, talk about it, and set some sensible privacy boundaries and hygiene practices!). 

Outsource: Show Kids How to Find Accurate Answers from Other Sources

The suggestions above will help you become your kid’s go-to resource for questions about bodies, sex, and relationships. But kids may have questions that they don’t feel comfortable talking about with you, and that’s OK, too. So it’s helpful to point out trustworthy resources they can go to.

PlannedParenthood.org

Our website has a ton of information on all things sex and relationships, including a section just for teens. They can find all kinds of commonly asked questions on our Ask The Experts blog, as well as ask questions of their own!

Roo

Roo is Planned Parenthood’s free, private, sex ed chatbot that can answer all of your kid’s questions about sex, relationships, puberty, and more. No question is too awkward for Roo! 

Chat/Text

For those times your kid wants to talk with a real person, our Chat/Text program connects them in real-time with trained health educators. Your child can text or chat with these health educators about pregnancy, STDs, birth control, and more. Like Roo, it’s free and confidential.

Spot On

Spot On is our period and birth control tracker app, available to download for free on iOS and Android. It’s a great way for young people with periods to get to know their cycle, learn about reproductive health, and, if they’re on birth control, help them stay on top of it with personalized support.

For More Information

Remember: You can make a big difference in helping your kid navigate sex and relationships throughout their life! The conversations you have with your child about bodies, sex, and relationships will help them stay safe and healthy as they grow up.

Here are more resources for you to use while you’re sheltering in place, or any time:

Planned Parenthood’s Guide for Parents

Tumblr Blog on Sex Education at Home

— Miriam at Planned Parenthood

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