I Closed My Eyes And Then Stared At The Ceiling With More Pain Than Any Absent Father Can Ever Inflect.

I closed my eyes and then stared at the ceiling with more pain than any absent father can ever inflect.

-a fanfic i read

More Posts from Neverthebabysitter and Others

5 months ago

Saw THIS post and I just thought, what about the other way around?

Steve having those stickers for The Party as a joke and like a reflex he does the same with Eddie, putting one of them in his forehead with a 'good boy' comment.

Eddie is completely flabbergasted and dumbfounded, left gaping like a fish and blushing because that was cute as hell, he got called a good boy and also, who doesn't like stickers?


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3 months ago

Original post date: August 17 2022

Original caption: roof cuddles


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5 months ago

Eddie gets famous but Steve is the one who ends up addicted to the kind of shit Eddie knows better than to touch. The band is taking off and Eddie worries, so Steve makes sure that he keeps it hidden. If he had less money, he would have a slower slide into deeper, more dangerous risks. But his boyfriend is the lead guitar of the band on the cover of magazines, so it's easy for Steve score. His boyfriend is famous and touring and Steve is listed as a personal assistant as he tags along. His boyfriend is performing to a roaring crowd at Madison Square Garden, and Steve is overdosing in the bathroom.


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8 months ago
Stobin Sketch Night 💜
Stobin Sketch Night 💜
Stobin Sketch Night 💜

Stobin sketch night 💜

4 months ago

Steve drove for a while after ditching Tommy and Carol.

He should have realized saying that shit about Nancy and Jonathan wasn't okay. He shouldn't have let his anger get the best of him. He acted like his dad and the more Steve thought about it, the more obvious it was that Tommy and Carol had always encouraged him to behave like that. They constantly were egging him on, making him angrier and angrier until he lashed out.

He didn't want to lash out. He didn't want his so-called friends to encourage that shit. He used to be kinder, gentle. He used to be more like his mom.

It was that thought that made Steve pull over. He couldn't really see the road anymore, his vision completely blurred both by tears and the shiner Jonathan gave him. Steve couldn't remember the last time he cried like this; tears streaming down his cheeks, snot dripping from his nose, his breath growing quicker and more panicked. He felt like he was drowning.

Then someone knocked on his window and scared the shit out of him.

He turned his head to look at the intruder, hastily wiping the tears from his eyes only to wince when he accidentally touched his bruised face. It was some girl he vaguely recognized. They probably went to school together. He thought she might be in band, but he had no way of knowing unless he actually asked her. Then again, that might make the fact that she was an apparent witness to his emotional breakdown even worse. God, he did not need rumors of "Crybaby Steve" circulating the school, especially after his fallout with Tommy and Carol. Desperately trying to calm his breathing, with varying degrees of success, Steve rolled his window down.

"Can I-- Can I help you?"

His voice cracking nearly sent him spiraling again, tears welling up once more.

"Is there a reason you picked my front lawn to shatter to pieces or am I just that lucky?"

He couldn't tell if it was the bluntness of her words, the deadpan delivery, or just the fact that she had the audacity to joke about the whole thing. Whatever it was, Steve burst out laughing. He sounded hysterical to his own ears, but it was a hell of a lot better than crying. He tried to reign himself in when she started looking nervous, but he could only taper his cackling down into breathy giggles.

"S-sorry. I don't know why-y I'm l-laughing."

The girl snorted at him, shaking her head in exasperation that seemed both irritated and fond.

"That's fine. We'll start with something easy. Why are you on my lawn?"

Steve glanced away from her and out the window and, sure enough, his car was halfway on her lawn. He turned back to her, sheepish.

"I, uh, I couldn't see the road. Sorry."

She blinked for a few moments, her expression betraying nothing on how she was feeling. There were a few instances where she looked like she was going to say something and decided against it. To say the least, her silence made Steve increasingly nervous.

"Do you want to sit on the grass for a bit?"

She seemed hesitant to make such an offer, but he could tell it was genuine nonetheless.

"Yeah."

So they sat on her lawn.

They sat on her lawn for hours. Talking, tearing up bits of grass and throwing them at each other, just simply existing in the moment. It was the most calm Steve had felt since he started high school.

"I'm worried that I went too far. That it won't matter if I apologize to them or not."

"It doesn't matter if they forgive you or not. It's important that they know you are aware that you fucked up. Acknowledge that you were in the wrong and don't want to make that same mistake. It sucks, but it's what you have to do if you wanna make it right."

"Yeah. Thanks Robin. You're really cool."

"That's quite the complement coming from The Hair."

Steve groaned, knowing full well what that nickname indicated. He laid back on the grass, gaze fixed on the darkening sky.

"Hey Robin?"

"Yeah Steve?"

"Would you maybe want to be friends? I don't really have any real ones."

And what a depressing thought that was. It was true, though. Tommy and Carol have never been real friends, not in the way he needed them to be. The closest thing he had was Nancy and look at how that turned out so far.

"Are you for real?"

Robin sounded bewildered and it made Steve wonder how isolated he made himself out to be that anyone would question why he might want to befriend them. God, popularity ruined him.

"Yes?"

Now he was anxious that Robin was only humoring him. Of course she wouldn't want to be friends with him. He was a complete loser, just like his dad always said.

"Okay. Yeah. We can be friends, Steve."

The warmth that spread through Steve was lightning fast. It felt almost as good as when Nancy would sneak away with him to make-out at school. Maybe even better.

"Cool. Thanks, uh, for all of this. I didn't mean to just kind of dump my shit on your lap, but I'm glad we met. Yeah. Anyway, I've got apologies to make. I'll see you later?"

He glanced at her from the side, a shy grin taking over his face. She smiled back and gave him a playful shove.

"See you later, Harrington. Tell me how it goes!"

Steve rushed back to his car, determination settling in his gut. He'd apologize to Jonathan first. It was only right.

***

Robin wouldn't go as far as to say that she was worried, but she was definitely curious. A tad concerned maybe. It was just that Steve hadn't been to class for the last three days. Nancy Wheeler and Jonathan Byers hadn't either and perhaps that was why Robin found herself anxious. After all, Barb Holland and Will Byers went missing recently. Who's to say the same thing couldn't have happened to those three?

Robin smacked her cheeks a few times. There was no sense in getting worked up by worst case scenarios. She'd get the facts, one way or another, even if it meant venturing all the way to Loch Nora to find Steve.

That plan turned out to be wholly unnecessary because Steve walked into class right as she had that thought. He looked a little twitchy, his eyes flicking across the classroom like they anticipated danger. It wasn't long before he clocked Robin. She waved and the smile that blossomed on his face was so bright she thought she was going to need sunglasses.

He went straight for his seat right in front of hers and immediately situated himself so that he was facing her.

"Hey Robin!"

"Hey yourself! Did everything go okay? I haven't seen you in class."

He studied his hands for a moment, a distant look passing through his eyes like he was remembering something, before he smiled ruefully at her.

"Yeah. Everything went okay. I would've come in yesterday, but my mom wanted me to rest at home. Wasn't feeling too good. I'm here now though! Ready to actually pay attention for once."

Robin snorted right as their English teacher entered the classroom. Steve spun around quickly to face the front, but every so often he turn his head halfway toward hers and make faces at her. She shoved him every time, a smile playing across her face.

Steve Harrington was a wild card, but Robin had a gut feeling that they'd be good for each other.

***

Happy Platonic Stobin Month! I have no idea how much I'm actually going to participate, but I did write this thing! So I hope y'all enjoy! (Prompts 1 & 20: Alternate Meeting/1983)


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5 months ago

Steve Harrington has OCD. There are days when he can barely hear his own thoughts. Days when he can't focus on anything else but whatever is triggering him. Days when he just wants to crawl out of his own skin.

No one around him gets it. Like, really gets it. He loves having everyone over at his place, loves filling the empty house with joy and laughter he never experienced as a child. But over and over again, he feels like he can't really be present in the moment. Because he gets stuck in a never-ending loop of mental checklists, pinpointing every single item that will need to be cleaned or put back in its place after they leave. Crumbs all over the couch. Henderson touching everything in his general vicinity with greasy, pizza-stained fingers. People walking straight into the house after swimming in the pool. Rug on the bathroom floor always wrinkled and askew. Tiny specs all over the kitchen that only he seems to notice. He knows they're little things. Unimportant, right? A little mess can't hurt you? He knows... He just wishes his brain would get it, too.

And it doesn't just impact him, either. His incessant bitching sets others around him on edge. That's probably the worst part of it all. Nancy used to get so annoyed with him whenever he'd ask her to not sit on his bed in her 'outside clothes'. He's pretty sure Robin hates cooking with him because of all the rules he has in the kitchen, but she usually just sighs and rolls her eyes. Dustin deliberately misunderstands his requests or, better yet, pretends he doesn't hear him at all.

Not Eddie, though. Because Eddie notices. The way Steve seems unfocused at times, like he's somewhere far away. The way his eyes tend to dart around the room. The way his posture changes when someone unknowingly does something that triggers him. He makes little mental notes of all the triggers and makes sure to remember them. So he starts taking off his shoes at the door, placing them on the rack. He cleans up after the kids, quickly wiping the kitchen counter and floor as Steve's busy walking everyone out of the house. He straightens the bathroom rugs. He wipes the floor after taking a shower at Steve's, so that there isn't a single droplet of water to be found anywhere outside the shower cabin. He changes his clothes before lounging around on Steve's bed. It takes Steve some time to notice everything Eddie's been doing to help out with his triggers.

It's a little after midnight, and Steve has finally managed to kick the little dipshits out of the house. He walks back into the kitchen where he is met with the sight of Eddie crouched down, a whisk broom and dustpan in hand. Something clicks then, stopping him in his tracks.

"Wait... How long have you been doing this?"

Eddie freezes then and glances up quickly, looking every bit like a deer caught in the headlights.

"Oh, sorry, it's just- I noticed the stuff on the kitchen floor makes you kinda uncomfortable, so I thought I'd help out a bit," Eddie says softly, like he's scared he's done something wrong. Steve feels something warm spread around in his chest, followed by a familiar burning sensation behind his eyes.

"And the rugs? Was that also you?" Steve's voice is shaking now. But he can no longer prevent it. He's about to have a full-on breakdown in front of Eddie Munson.

Of course, Eddie, the perceptive bastard that he is, has already picked up on what's about to happen. He quickly sets the tools aside and straightens up, taking a few strides towards Steve, ducking his head to catch Steve's downcast gaze. To make sure he's okay.

"Hey, Steve, look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. I shouldn't have overstepped. I'm so sorry," says Eddie, gently placing his hands on Steve's shoulders to offer a reassuring touch. There are now silent tears rolling down Steve's cheeks, but he brings himself to meet Eddie's gaze nevertheless.

"No, no, Eddie, you didn't. It's just- How did you know?" Steve asks, somewhat hesitantly.

"Because," Eddie moves his hands up to cup Steve's face, looking at Steve like he's trying to see straight into his soul, "because I see you, Steve Harrington."


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5 months ago

Adding to this post, imagine them being famous in the future.

Eddie becoming a rising star as soon as he gets out of Hawkins, his band corroded coffin entering the music scene and having massively popular songs. People are getting more intrigue for his past murder charges, but he gets easily defended once he gets a solid fan base (and the fact that he was absolved of those charges).

And Steve entering the acting scene at the same time, him and Robin being just some extras in a movie for the extra cash, but the director falls in love with the sibling-like duo, making them a cameo where Steve acts like a buffer, making the male character jealous so he can make a move.

It was a simple role, just a few minutes of screen with one-liners of dialogue, but to the surprise of everybody—except for Robin—Steve killed the role. Maybe it was his eyes that enamored everyone, his kicked puppy look or his smile, but he became the nation's sweetheart. 

After that, he got cast for more minor roles, and little by little established himself as an actor, to the point of being the lead more frequently. 

With that, the two of them are well established in their own fields, working hard and being well-known. So it's not rare that at some point they end up in the same event.

It could be anything, a festival, some awards, just a party of famous people—the point is, they are in a public space, surrounded by people that have no idea they know each other, and like an instinct, they act like swore enemies.

Their minds are so used to associate:

"being in public" + "hide true relationship and have fun" = "fake hate each other"

Becuase years of pulling that stunt in their teenagehood that like reflex they spit second-hand insults. 

Like– they lock eyes on each other and instantly looked up and down in the bitchiest way possible. Honestly, at this point it has become their own weird way of flirting, the more vicious the comment the more they will drive the other crazy.

Of course, neither of them realize what they were doing until they both were making out in the bathroom, squirreling away from the vent, going to the closest hotel and waking up the next day with friends/acquaintances from their own jobs field asking for the latest gossip of the industry.

The way Robin would laugh her ass off, only to act like a toddler, pointing fingers and giggling at the two dinguses when they realize what they have done.

It was not intentional, and now everyone who was in the event thinks they hate each other's guts like old times.

The public doesn’t know yet, the reporters still not hearing about this until well-respected journalist, Nancy Wheeler (who has already written about each of them, one for Eddie and one for Steve), makes an article about their long complicated story.

(No, she isn't being petty, Mike, she just thinks it’s funny, and it’s not like she is lying, they do have a long and complicated story, it’s just a little to the left, she just isn't saying some things)

The next time someone interviews one of them, they are asking about the other, why they hate each other, if there’s some drama, why they didn't know they knew the other, etc.

Long story short, they pulled the same bit they did in school, but now by accident and to the whole country (and the world when they start getting more international).

They tried to clarify but fell on deaf ears, people thinking is just to safe face or keep appearances, after all the habit doesn’t quite go and they always ended up flirting with insults in every event they are together.

They definitely start to enjoying it and play along after a while.

Not only that, but they enjoyed it even more when years later, in a random day, they posted their X years wedding anniversary photos with their family.

Everyone lost their shit after that.


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3 months ago

(In the same universe as this post because it’s funnier that way)

Wayne spends an hour talking to Steve, trying to build some connection with the kid since it seems like he’s gonna be around for a while and Eddie really likes him.

It’s not the most natural conversation because neither seem to be big talkers but Wayne feels pretty good about it. Until Steve leaves and Eddie opens his trap.

Eddie, trying his best to destroy their can opener in the kitchen, says ten minutes after Steve leaves, “Wayne, I thought you hated being in marching band.”

“I did.”

“Why’d you spend an hour talking about it then?” Eddie asks. “I’ve literally never heard you say that much about anything.”

“Steve’s in the marching band. Just trying to find some common ground.”

“Steve’s not in the marching band.”

“Yes, he is,” Wayne says. “He was wearing a marching band tshirt.”

“No, Steve’s wearing Robin’s tshirt,” Eddie grins, finally succeeding in opening a can of peaches. “Robin is in the marching band. Steve graduated last year.”

Well. Fuck.

“What the hell does that kid like?”

“I dunno,” Eddie shrugs (he absolutely does know). “He kinda just goes with the flow.”


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6 months ago

Just here thinking about Steve getting isekai'ed. Like. One of my favorite things is reading generic isekai mangas/manhwas with overpowered protagonists and convenient situations at the point i don't even remeber wich ones i've read.

So imagine one Steve harrington getting summoned into an isekai, him being the basic hero who needs to defeat the demon King, going on a journey, making comrades, learning magic and using a sword, etc, etc.

But also, him having already lived the upside down. Steve being summon shortly after the events of the fourth season (just without eddie dying), with the experience of fighting monsters, the survival mode still in his system, with the fear that the monsters of this other world could came to his own through glowing magic circles just like he did.

Because of that, after the princess and the saint had promised him that he could go back to his own world, to his home, his friends (his family), at the shortest time possible after he got summon, didn't matter how much time he spend in this other world. He decides— like the self-sacrifice idiot with a hero complex that he is— that he would help.

Clue Steve living a whole isekai for almost a decade just to come back after a week had passed in his original world.

Of course The Party would have noticed Steve's missing, the Gates are still open, the whole town split apart, monsters hadn't started to appear but is only time until they do, so of course they are high alert and notice when one of them just go radio silent.

Nobody knows where he is, what happened to him, if he's still alive. And since the whole town is a mess they can't exactly do a search for a misssing person.

And just like he disappeared, he reappears one week later, Hopper founding him drinking beer in the only still open bar of town with more scars than before, carrying a sword in his waist and with all the powers and cofidence he gained in the magical world intact.

Now if Vecna decides to make his come back, he would stand no chance against the rage of a superpowered teenage girl, a rag tag group of teenagers, four tired adults and a returned hero with almost a decade of experience fighting beings more powerful than he.


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He/She Steve Harrington my beloved ♡ ✧⁠◝⁠(⁠⁰⁠▿⁠⁰⁠)⁠◜⁠✧ [ENG/ESP] Personal blog: imgoingtobed | Artblog(?: whatami-chopliver

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