Flower Curse | 1. White Petal

Flower Curse | 1. White Petal

[levixmale!readerxerwin]

english isn’t my first language, so sorry for the grammatical errors!

this work will have vomiting, heavy angst and death. the reader suffers from the hanakahi disease.

summary: you loved him. he didn’t. everything goes downhill when suddenly, you cough a petal when you think of him.

The Hanahaki Disease is an illness born from one-sided love, where the patient throws up and coughs of flower petals when they suffer from one-sided love. The infection can be removed through surgery, but the feelings disappear along with the petals.

1

Love hurt. Even more with the disease you had; some people could say it was ’poetic’ and so ’romantic’. You could have thought that one day a long time ago; just because this curse was so rare to have or yet so slim. You had yet to find someone who had this in real life and not in some fairy tales in child books or romantic novels for adults.

x x x It all began when you were alone in your office, working on some stressful paperwork Hanji handed you to finish for today. You were so deep in your work that the knock on your door wasn't heard at all. It was at the third attempt that you heard a female voice you knew to well. “Who and why?“ you irritably asked, one hand on your temple and another holding a paper not yet finished. “Petra Ral, bringing more paperwork, sir” she answered opening the door as you told her to come in. Sending you a gentle smile, she gave you the papers and spoke with some playfulness in her sweet voice, “It seems everybody is really busy today! Your voice scared me more than the Corporal, [Name]!“ You only closed your eyes and slightly laughed, sitting more comfortably on your seat. Looking at her, you tiring smiled, “Sorry, Petra. Somehow today we have a lot of paperwork, and you know paperwork is boring as hell,” you both laughed, “How is the Corporal? Is he handling this better than me?” You knew she tried to hide her blushing when speaking about her Corporal, but you were to observant to not notice it. You always are observing every little detail about everyone, even her with no exceptions. You knew she and you had feelings for the same person but unlike her, nobody knew about your feelings about the Corporal. Well, just Erwin knew; the man was like a hawk. He knows everything and sees everything; just like Mike magical nose. These two were weirdos, but great friends nevertheless. “He’s been stressed, but making him some tea relax him,” Petra gets near to you and covers her mouth, as like telling a secret she only knew about, “I think I'm making better tea lately! He’s been complimenting me a lot!” this time the blush on her cheeks was stronger and smiles at you with a dreaming smile you always saw on other cadets when talking about their lovers, just like that Jean kid in lunch looking at Mikasa with a cheesy look. You knew loving the corporal was a bad idea. Levi wasn't that talkative about liking someone in that way, hell, you don't even know if he loved someone in that way. Yes, you both were great friends, the two of you liked to drink tea together and talk about the present and future, about the new recruits and their skills, joking together or just stay in a comfortable silence. You treasured his friendship, so ruining it by confessing was an absolute and horrible mistake you weren't going to make. He didn't loved you that way and you were okay with that. Until Petra came and everything began to hurt. You wished being observant wasn't one of your skills. You wished you didn't notice the glances they gave each other when they were alone or someone wasn't looking. You wished you didn't see the sparkles on both of their eyes. You wished deep in your heart, to not notice how Petra ’accidentally’ brushed her hand on his and he didn't say a word. You wished, you really did. Lies was one of your strong skills too. If talking to the Corporal and not showing any affection or jealously when glancing at their actions wasn't like wearing a mask everyday a skill you didn't know what was. Nobody break trough your thick mask, unlike Erwin. The fucker very well knew about all of your façade, how could he not? You two were close and just to see into your eyes he knew everything. “Is that so, Petra? It seems like you being his wife isn't that far far away...” you grinned, making a cheesy face at her. Only to get her blushing like a tomato, covering her face with both hands. “Don't say that THAT loud! Someone can hear you!” “As if no one knows, little Petra. Why don't you both go in a date already? At this rate someone is going to make better tea than you... I'm just saying...” you teased her with a playful smile. Petra was your friend, you couldn't feel bad things for her. She was really sweet and pretty. She was like a sister to you, and you were a brother to her. You didn't intended the relationship being like that but it just happened. “You think so?! But— what if he doesn't like me back?” “Petra, my dear, I'm sure he likes you back.” you reassured her. “You really think I don't see how he looks at you? You know how he feels. I know.” you thought, feeling a sharp pain in your chest that you ignored and faked a smile. “Maybe I will tell him soon... Thank you, [Name]. Also, if it weren't for you, I wouldn't make good tea! Thank you again for the tips. Levi really likes it.” “You're welcome, Petra. Good luck on telling him, I'm sure he feels the same way.” Saying farewells both of you returned to your work. When she left, your expression changed completely with a grimmer one. You didn't smile; just stared at nothing in particular. You were thinking on how they would look together, how they would hug and say each other “I love you”. The thought repulsed and hurt you; sickening you. A pain in your chest made you snap out of it, making you to cough harshly. You felt as if something wanted to get out of your throat; but it didn't feel like vomit at all. It stopped when you coughed a white petal, something that confused you completely. Did you breathe in petals by accident? That was unlikely, there weren't any flowers nearby. But then, how did this petal got in? Something felt very wrong to you. You just stared at the petal dumbfounded, not really knowing what to think of it. You just placed it next to your paper, already forgetting about it.

t w o

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1 year ago

REISS MENTAL ASYLUM / 14

【 shingeki no kyojin / mental asylum – alternative universe, modern setting 】 『male!yandere!various x male!prettyboy!reader』 summary: Finally! You have been given an opportunity to work at Reiss Mental Asylum- your job hunting hasn’t been great, so to hear you got an opportunity made you excited. At the beginning everything seems normal- but without noticing, some people began to get obsessed with you. warnings/tags: DARK/HEAVY THEMES. Non-consensual themes; sexual assault, touching, drug use, rape attempt. Home invasion, yanderes, obsessive behavior, murder, blood, explicit content, sexual thoughts. Somnophilia at the end! masterlist

notes: someday i will rewrite this whole cringe thing and feel better about it, LOL. but i hope there's enjoyement in this chapter.

REISS MENTAL ASYLUM / 14

13

「lazy afternoons」

“Yes, Porco, I’m okay.” [name] chuckled softly. “I will stay over a friend’s house, so there’s no need to worry about me.”

Porco snorted loudly, obviously making fun of his lie. [name] pouted at such reaction. “A friend’s house? Exactly who? You have no friends, you loser."

”H—Hey! I do have friends!!” He felt childish, and he could tell Porco was having fun by proving him he was a lonely loser. “I have many!!”

”Really? Haven’t seen you go out a single day without the same fucking guy.”

"They are just... secretive. AND busy!"

"Busy... of course." Porco's tone changed, but [name] couldn't put more attention thanks to his migraine. "If everything goes well here, we'll have a talk, you and me. It's important."

"That sounds serious... is something going on?"

"Just... take care of yourself in that disgusting place, man. Tell Victor—"

"Vincent!"

"Whatever his fucking name is, to stay with you. With what you told me, I..." Porco couldn't continue. [name] heard some grunts on the other line— was he embarrassed?

[name] grinned. "I care about you too, Porco."

"Shut up. I'm hanging up." [name] could tell he was flustered, but silenced his laugh.

"See you soon!"

"Lock your doors and windows."

"Will do."

‿̩͙‿ ༺ ♰ ༻ ‿̩͙‿

After the call ended, [Name] let out a grunt. He hid his head within his covers as he remembered Mike’s words about him getting sick. The man was a witch—or maybe a wizard? Either way, he was right. Or at least, his nose told him the future, somehow.

[Name] hadn’t felt dandy when he got to his apartment the night before. He knew getting out of the car by himself wasn’t possible, and Levi, knowing this, helped him as he did before.

He had a bad stomachache and an urge to throw up again; but thought a good night's rest was enough to wake him up and make him feel better. Unfortunately, the moment his alarm interrupted his sleep, he felt the worst way possible.

He also had a fever. He was 100% sure. The cushion was already disgustingly wet from his sweat, along with his pillow, but his sudden weak body didn’t let him get up. Not even when he felt the need to puke. So poor [Name] had to stay put and try to calm himself if he didn’t want to make a disgusting mess in his room. He didn't know how much time had passed since then.

Even if his whole body felt weak and disgusting, [Name] tried to get out of bed to go to the bathroom. Yet, the moment he got up, he almost fell— if it weren’t for his nightstand, his face would have been kissing the floor, with blood being a plus. It was then that he accepted his defeat and called Margaret to notify her of his absence. She had replied, saying she had been waiting for his call since Mike mentioned his condition yesterday. The poor sick just sighed, thanked her, apologized, and hung up.

He was ready for another bad sleep when the phone on the nightstand rang. His eyes couldn’t identify the caller since his vision was a bit blurry, but answered blindly. The moment the voice in the other line spoke, [Name] miraculously surpassed an embarrassing yelp from coming out.

“[Name], it’s Erwin. Good morning, first of all. I’ve been notified of your absence for today. Is everything alright?”

“O—Oh, uhm, y—yes! Ah—! Sorry, good morning!” It was obvious [Name] wasn’t in the right mind. He couldn’t think clearly, and his head felt like it was burning. His words slurred a bit.  “I just got a bit of a fever— nothing I can’t handle, heheee…” What a fast man Erwin was— did he call him the moment Margaret notified him?

”Is that so? How are you feeling?”

”Everything is good! I’m fffine, really!”

There was a moment of silence on the other line, making [Name] a bit anxious. Was he angry? Upset? Did the think this was a lie?

“I see. Also, don’t worry about today’s schedule. Everything’s covered, alright?”

“O—Ok… and, uhm… sorry about today… I didn’t meaan to get sick…”

[Name] heard a chuckle from the other line. ”Don’t worry about that, [Name]. It’s not your fault— something like that can be rearranged when you feel better, so don’t overthink it.”

After saying goodbye, [Name] let out a sigh he didn’t know he was holding.

The silence filling his room let his mind wander about the frightening man. He had felt the intense gaze on him everywhere he went. The sick male wanted to believe something else but a feeling of desire filled those blue eyes. The thought only caused him to grip the bedsheets harder, his face feeling warmer and his thoughts messy. He wanted to turn a blind eye to it, but it was too obvious. The man was bold!

But… would it be wrong, though? To accept the date fully? At the moment, it felt like an obligation—a must. [Name] didn’t feel particularly happy about such a thing. Neither when Zeke wanted to use him to do such dirty play to Erwin. Now, it didn’t feel that bad; it was just embarrassing. He laughed light-headedly as he pictured Erwin on a date with him—maybe eating strawberry cake? or just chuckling at whatever they were talking about…

The imaginary moment lulled him slowly, blinking lazily at the ceiling. Maybe a good sleep in another place would make him feel better…

But a knock on his door interrupted him, startling him. The sound only made him grunt— he didn’t want to get up… but he did nevertheless. Of course, as his mind wasn’t in the right state, he took his blanket with drawings of frogs with him. He breathed heavily as he tried not to stumble too much. When he got to the entrance, he opened the door right away while his mind ignored how Porco scolded him about how he had to look into the peephole first before answering the door. Living in this godforsaken apartment was dangerous; serial killers would love to pick a stupid victim here, he said.

He blinked lazily, not really recognizing who he was staring at. Until he abruptly stood straight with a yelp, realizing it was Levi at his door, looking as happy as ever. [Name] couldn’t be more embarrassed by how he looked right now: a blanket with cartoony frogs on it, his oversize T-shirt with his favorite cartoon, and his shorts. His hair was a mess, his face was warm, and his eyes fought to stay closed— it was more to say that his bruises were on display too.

Levi, amused by the display, raised a brow. “It looks like nose man was right.”

Still, [Name] didn't know what else to say. He stood there, dumbfounded.

“Are you making me stay here all day or what? Have some manners.” The ravenette spoke in irritation, but with no malice. After all, it was known by now that his scolding was just for fun. Well... sometimes. This was enough to wake [name] up from his embarrassing episode. He quickly opened the door with incoherent mumbling and stood aside, letting Levi inside.

He felt dizzy; what he said sounded more as if he was barely keeping it together. “I—I didn’t expect you here!” He cringed at his own wording, trying to save himself: “I mean, I don’t mean you can’t come in! It’s just that I— Weeell—”

“I didn’t expect myself here either, but since we all know you don’t know a thing about self-care, here I am." The ravenette spoke sternly, his eyes narrowing into a sharp critical gaze as he observed the apartment.

“Buuuut… There was no neeeed…” The amount of talking made him even dizzier, as he stumbled backwards a little bit. Levi just raised a brow, expecting another lie.

“Stop being stubborn and sit down.” The ravenette placed some plastic bags on the table and emptied it. He took out a canned soup, and [Name] could smell fresh vegetables from the other bag.

He stared dumbfoundedly at the contents, then at Levi, then at the bags, then at the man again. The ravenette stared him back and spoke as if he was talking with an idiot: “You don’t have anything in your fridge.”

[Name] stayed in silence, processing the words from him. Then, he stood straight as he stared in embarrassment, eyebrows furrowing. “How do you know that?!”

“Because that’s you.”

[Name] didn’t know if to take that as an offense, so he avoided the ravenette’s gaze and looked defeated.

Levi didn’t care, it seemed, since he changed the subject. “What have you been doing before I got here?”

“Hmn… nothing…?” [Name] sighed and blinked lazily. “I wanted to take a shower, since I’m all sweaty… but I didn’t have any energy, and I thought I would feeell—”

“Oh, you will,” Levi stated, while crossing his arm as he tried to think, “you will get that shower. You look like a pig.”

“You are meaaaaan…” it wasn’t as if [Name] was in his right mind anyway to think of what he said, “I’m going to fall… I can’t go… and I feel sick,” he tightened the froggy bedsheets around him even more— he just wanted to fall asleep again.

“No.” Levi spoke sternly, harshly taking the cover off of [Name], causing him to gasp. “You will get that shower, so better get up and show me where the bathroom is before I take the sink to shower you.”

The ravenette took [Name] from the back of his shirt, forcing him to stand up. [Name] couldn’t help but comply, secretly glad he didn’t have to walk alone anymore as he guided Levi to the bathroom. It could seem like a careless action or touch by Levi, but he was sure [Name] wouldn’t fall even if he tripped, since the grip on his collar was strong enough.

He just didn’t want to touch sweat.

Levi was a bit grateful the bathroom was in decent shape after seeing such living room. It was small, with some corners and part of the sink and bathtub colored in oxidation thanks to the time. The mirror had some marks on it, along with the flooring having some ruptures. In Levi's mind, he couldn't stop repeating how horrible this place was. Or rather, how disgusting this whole building was.

He ordered [name] to steady himself with the sink while he filled the bathtub with not-too-warm water. Complying with a soft okay—! [name] allowed Levi to work, a little embarrassed when he noticed Levi’s narrowed eyes glaring at how slowly the water came in. If he was bothered or irritated, he didn't voice it, nor did [name].

In whatever silence they were in, Levi broke it off with a blunt order as he returned to his spot beside [name], taking his collar again. "Take your clothes off."

"U—Uh..?! That's sooo straightforward!!" raising his voice, [name] could feel his face getting warmer. "I—I can't do that in front of youu...!"

"Then should I throw you fully clothed in the water? Or should I undress you myself?"

[Name] felt a little bit of dread at the thought of Levi letting go of him. If he did, [name] didn't trust himself to remain standing.

"O-Okay, okay! Just... please turn around," he said his request with as much gentleness as he could have, eyeing Levi with a pleading look. The ravenette frowned as he stared at the sick idiot for a couple of seconds with cryptic eyes before giving in. Sighing in relief, [name] used Levi's shoulders to steady himself as he undressed clumsily. A few times [name] tightened his grasp on Levi's when tripping with his own clothes, only noticing his strength when the ravenette grunted or let out a remark.

"D—Don't turn around yet! Just... step backwards a little bit, pleease..." Carefully, [name] stepped inside the bathtub with a hum as his skin met the tepid water. It was just then, with water just under his chest as he hugged his legs, that he realized how hot he was. He involuntarily sank his whole body into the water, humming at the now-comforting temperature. He quickly retreated to his original stance when he remembered Levi was waiting for him. "...okay, you can turn around..."

"Finally." Levi took a small stool that was behind the sink and placed it beside the bathtub, sitting down. He rolled up his sleeves and took the shampoo, placing some on his hands. "Close your eyes," he commanded before rubbing the shampoo on [name]'s head, massaging the scalp.

It was actually relaxing on [name]'s part. He thought Levi would be rougher, but his hands were gentle. He could hear himself let out a content hum while his shoulders eased and he rested his chin on his knees.

“Bend over a bit.” Levi asked in a gentle tone this time, taking the soap. Just when [Name] obeyed and Levi was ready to lather him up, he noticed a lengthy burn scar on [Name]’s back, more so on the left side. It didn’t look… severe per se— boiled water, perhaps? Levi could tell fire didn’t cause it.

Whoever it was or whatever caused it, Levi continued to bathe [Name] with other thoughts in mind. It seemed the idiot had forgotten, since he didn’t say a thing about his silence.

“Sorry you haave to do aaall of this, Levi…” [Name]’s voice cut his dark thoughts off. “I’m very sorryyy,”

This time, it was Levi who sighed. “I told you yesterday, didn’t I, idiot? If I don’t do it myself, I will be in a bad mood all fucking day. And I have enough with those shitty glasses at work.”

[Name] giggled, “a mooore of bad mood?”

“Don’t get smart with me.” Levi warned him, but he didn’t sound hostile.

[name] talked about everything and anything. He looked content even if Levi gave hums or half answers when being asked something. At some point, [name]'s voice got lower and lower, until he fell silent. The ravenette was unsure if he had fallen asleep, but seeing his shoulders go up and down slowly made him sure.

Just seeing him like this, in this godforsaken place, rotting away... made him feel something he didn't want to say out loud. He just felt irritation.

[name] seemed asleep. Before waking him up, Levi gently caressed the scar on his back and wondered the reason for this act of dominance. Confusion, or perhaps anger, danced in his mind—not exactly for the scar per se.

He retreated his touch and got up, speaking louder to wake [name] up.

"Oi. Wake up. You can't sleep yet." As he took a towel, he signaled him to stand up to dry his body. He noticed how groggily the [hair color]-haired stood up, with eyes closing every two seconds and not even complaining about being seen naked this time. Levi quickly wrapped [name]'s body without much of a glance. His arm went around [name]'s waist to guide him out of the bathroom and to his room, as [name] vaguely told him where it was.

Surprisingly, his room wasn't a mess. Everything seemed in order and clean, to Levi's somehow relief. Levi asked him for clean clothes as he helped [name] sit down on his bed, but [name] was unable to answer because of his sleepy state. The ravenette grunted as he snapped his fingers in front of [name]'s face, making him jump in surprise and barely waking him up.

"Clothes... Ah! Right there, Levi." The ravenette opened the wardrobe and took the first thing he saw, which was another oversized T-shirt with, this time, a picture of a fat cat, and a pair of shorts. He couldn't stop himself from raising his brows in amusement at such choice of designs, almost wanting to make a remark about it. Yet, it wouldn't be as rewarding to see [name]'s groggy state acting stupid like his normal self. He threw the shirt over [name]'s head, the sick completely out of it to even complain about it.

Levi crossed his arms. "Answer—should I dress you or are you capable?"

"Mhm...? Oh, yeah... I caan..." [name] yawned, lazily taking the shirt. Levi had never seen such clumsiness before as he observed how the idiot missed the biggest entrance for his head to one of the arm’s. And then he looked pretty content about being trapped in the smallest hole, as if he had done a splendid job.

“You look stupid.” That was the only statement Levi could spit out before helping him with the t-shirt. His next objective was the shorts, but [Name] seemed to quickly snap out of his dazed and quickly stutter slurred words Levi couldn’t understand, but could decipher by [Name]’s stupid, embarrassed expression. As always, he asked him to turn around.

“You need to eat.” Levi stated as [Name] finished, turning to him once again.

“I want to sleep, Levi.” The sick idiot tried to lay down on the bed, but Levi’s grip on his shirt stopped him.

“Before that, you will eat.”

“But I’m sleepy…” [Name] tried to ‘charm’ Levi by blinking and staring pathetically. The ravenette narrowed his eyes.

It didn’t work. “But I don’t care. Get up.”

All of this felt like Levi was taking care of a child. Or perhaps a cat. A clumsy, useless cat whose life was only to destroy things and be a nuisance.

[Name] complied. Although this time he didn’t try to not be an annoyance, because his body felt heavier and his words didn’t make sense. Levi knew he needed sleep, but he couldn’t let him, still. Or he just didn’t want to. He couldn’t deny that painful, tired face made him feel better.

He instructed [Name] to patiently wait on the couch, since at least he had some mercy on him and didn’t let him wait on the chair while Levi chopped some vegetables for the food.

The sounds of the old TV and the low snores from [Name]’s filled the room, leaving Levi in a barely peaceful moment.

As he put the ingredients into the pot where he had filled it with the soup, he went to sit on the chair while observing [Name], who waited for the food to be ready.

The idiot stayed asleep, with no care or worry about who was with him. Has anyone broken in? Levi wondered.

The lock looked cheap and easy to break, but Levi instantly knew this idiot would open the door before looking, even if he was in his sane mind. A strong lock or a fancier building wouldn’t change that.

If Erwin hadn't taken a liking to him, where would he be? Dead inside a dumpster, maybe. Or perhaps in a job barely making the minimum wage. Or suffering under someone’s orders. Well, it wasn’t as if his situation was any better, in such a filthy place. Erwin had his reasons to hire him, but he didn't share them. What he couldn't hide from Levi was the acts of devotion he had for the assistant; how his blue eyes stared with such... affection? No. Erwin wasn't like that. Something vicoius hide beside that caring-boss facade. 

Speaking of that, who was this guy? Levi felt even more disgusted by the place as he took another look around. This whole building was rotting. Either way, Levi could observe [name]’s attempt to ‘hide’ the mess—pictures. One with him and friends? Perhaps family; a younger [name] with a dog; another picture of him, a guy looking irritated with a black-haired girl... Pretty ordinary pictures.

There were a few small plants, too. A book on the table beside the couch; keys hanging on the wall—were those small paintings? Levi could distinguish between what seemed to be the ocean and a sunset; in another painting, there were frogs in a pod.

[Name] was just like he imagined: a mundane person that he wouldn't usually take an interest in. How could he? This clumsy guy was easy to control, easy to overpower, had naive ideas, was dense... Then why this sudden attention? To someone so insignificant? He could understand Erwin's motives and even that four-eyes son of a bitch, but not his own. Levi found this irritable.

Maybe he liked to imagine how he would tangle his fingers between [name]'s hair, seeing his expression of satisfaction only for him to pull and see that face of being hurt: that pout, teary eyes, that slight frown meaning that he's going to cry... Or just harshly grab that jaw to hear him squeak once he takes his hand away to see the marks he made on that pretty face.

That face…

Levi narrowed his eyes.

That stupid face.

The reminder of the food interrupted his nightmarish thoughts. He went to check and realized it was ready. Without any permission, he took a bowl from the drawers—which didn’t have much—which, particularly, was blue with painted sheep. Levi couldn’t really believe how childish this guy was—hmn? Was that a mug with painted cats…?

Levi served the food. Even when he made lots of noise, the sick idiot didn't even move. The caretaker got in front of him and stared him down—[name] looked exhausted. His expression wasn't a comfortable one*; his body looked tense, and he was sweating.

He looked disgusting.

“Wake up.” Levi grabbed the front of his shirt with no gentleness.

[Name] barely woke up groggily, with his eyes barely opening and closing. From his mouth came words with no meaning, not even pying attention for the man.

Levi made him sit down while he ignored his pleas for him to stop. “Food’s ready. Wake the hell up.”

“Buuuut… I’m asleep…”

“Now you’re not. Get up.” [name] resisted. Levi gritted his teeth, and in his eyes reflected an anger that made [name] shiver. “Get the fuck up, or I’ll punch you until you die.”

“Ok, Okay! I’mm uup—!” Even with slurred words and a weak mind, he knew Levi didn’t make jokes. The thought of Levi acting like a beast made him gulp.

“Huh…” [name] looked at the table, and then at the couch. “Can I eat on the couch…? I don’t want to sit down…”

Levi tightened the grip on his collar. The sounds from the TV weren’t helping his temper much, since an annoying money TV game was on and fueled Levi’s annoyance with him.

The caretaker only pulled him forcibly. “No. You will sit like a civilized, mannered person, not like a pig. You will make a mess if you lay down.”

[name] didn’t dare say anything else. He sat down, like a good boy, and looked at his food. It looked good, actually. The nice aroma reminded him of the hunger in his stomach, as it immediately growled. [name] took the spoon, ready to eat it all.

But, just as expected, [Name] was unable to even feed himself accordingly. His sloppy movements, thanks to his sudden sleepiness, made him unable to hold the spoon properly, messing up the table and dirtying his face. Levi grunted, disgusted once again and more annoyed.

With a harsh move, he took the spoon from [Name]’s shaky hand, surprising him with it. But before Levi could feed him himself, he took a napkin and, with not much gentleness, cleaned [Name]’s face. Whimpers and soft complaints left [Name], but they went to deaf ears. Just as Levi finished, he clicked his tongue at his own exasperation.

“Open your mouth. I will feed you like the child you are.” Levi harshly took [name]'s jaw while he guided the spoon to his mouth. [Name] felt ashamed at first, desperately staring anywhere but Levi's eyes. The ravenette didn't like [name]'s childish behavior, as his grip on his jaw tightened. [name] jumped, opening his mouth with teary eyes. "Why don't you just obey? Always doing what you should not be doing." Levi's never softened his grip, perhaps as a punishment for being disobedient.

This kept going in silence until [name] felt full. A gentle touch on the hand with which Levi gripped his jaw was enough for his caretaker to abruptly stop and glare at him directly. [name]’s body tensed. "I'm—I'm full..." The stare he got was enough to make him shiver. Why were there times when he could speak to Levi normally, but in times like this, Levi unnerved him?

It didn't help when he stared like that. And the way he silently got up, took his bowl, and began doing the dishes didn’t help at all. Was he angry? Did he do something wrong?

Well, whatever. He felt sleepy again. The food had helped him feel comfortable, in some way.

“Dhankss for the food, Levaa…” His eyelids felt heavy.

A grunt was the only answer. [name] slowly began to drift away, dreams taking his mind. His arms rested on the table, letting his face rest on them. The soft silence from the dishwasher lulled him.

This time, Levi didn't say anything else. Instead, he knew he felt a hand caress his hair before shaking his shoulder, but he could be wrong, after all.

“You are asleep already.” Levi’s soft voice sounded far away, even if he was next to him. His strong arm wrapped around his waist, guiding him to the bathroom again.

[name] couldn't open his eyes anymore. His body felt automatic—he just felt Levi’s hands on his mouth, brushing his teeth gently. Did he dream all of this, actually?

He didn’t even remember walking to his bed, but he was already under the covers. Levi’s hand rested on his forehead, and [name] could barely see his usual frown. The sick idiot couldn't help but close his eyes again, but once he opened them again, something cold was resting on his forehead.

Levi said something, but [name] didn't understand.

“That feelss goood…” [name] smiled contently. He chuckled softly. “You are a great nurse, Mr. Levi.”

Levi didn’t like that, since he flicked a finger on [name]’s forehead. [Name] whined, the eyes of betrayal stared at Levi’s face, who glared back. [Name] pouted.

“Not nice…”

“I’m not nice.” Levi changed the cloth to a colder one, by [name]’s relief.

“You are.” He closed his eyes again.

“Not.”

“Just rough sometimes. But you are nice.”

Levi didn’t answer, but it was enough for [name] to look content. A frown formed on Levi’s face while he sat down beside [name]. He took the mug off the nightstand, which [name] didn’t even notice, and waited for the sick idiot to react. “Take a sip.”

“What’s…?”

“Ginger tea. Take. A. Sip.”

[name] chuckled like an idiot while Levi helped him sit down. Levi’s hand on his back and how he helped him take small sips brought him some type of comfort. The feeling of being taken care of was… nice, even if he knew Levi didn’t like the whole idea. Any other type of comfort in his life was Porco; he would be lying if he didn’t feel happy having someone so… caring and trustworthy around him. Knowing he was away made him sad.

“I… don’t waant mooore.”

Levi stopped without much to say, and left the mug in its previous place. He told [name] not to lay down since he could feel like vomiting again. He changed the cloth again before his hand stayed on his forehead to not let the cloth fall down. [name] opened his eyes tiredly to admire Levi. Well, what else could he do?

Levi sure was a handsome man. Or did he confess that to himself because he was not in his right mind? Well, he didn’t admit that out loud…

He felt lightminded; perhaps that’s why he felt bolder to say things.

“You are scary sometimes.” Even though the statement wasn’t a positive thing to say, [name] smiled like an idiot. “Veeeeery scary…”

Levi narrowed his eyes.

“Buut even scary, you look good!”

Levi didn’t react— not openly, at least. “And you look dumb, but that doesn’t give you any favors.”

[Name] chuckled. Levi helped him lay down again.

“I’m sleepy.”

Levi removed the cloth and rested his hand on [name]’s forehead to feel his temperature. [Name] hummed contently as he felt Levi’s cold fingers on his warm skin. Without much thought, he gently moved Levi’s fingers over his closed eyes. He felt more comfort.

“Migraine?” Levi asked.

“Hmn…” [Name] didn’t have more energy to give a detailed answer.

“I left pills on your nightstand.” Levi said, “Take some.”

“No… I’m… tired…” [name]’s eyelids felt heavier, and he couldn’t help closing them.

Levi didn’t like being contradicted, but he kept silent. Perhaps he was tired because of him, or just annoyed. He grunted but didn’t say further. The room fell into silence. Levi stared at [name]’s face, who rested quietly. As he saw nothing else bothering him, he got up and spoke loudly for [name] to hear. [name] opened his eyes tiredly when he got up from the bed.

"It's time for me to go, then." Levi was ready to leave, but he felt something pulling his hand before he began to walk away. He turned his head just to see [name] staring at him with pleading eyes, almost looking like a child scared of the dark.

"Nooo... don't leave me, please," he pleaded. "Stay with me..."

"I can't. Go to sleep."

"But, Levi, I'm scared of being alone... Please, just stay with me this time, pretty pretty please?"

Levi stared, again. With holding hands still, [name] blinked slowly with his long eyelashes, making his plea more "captivating.” Levi wanted to punch his face.

“No.”

“Pretty pleasse…” [name] tightened the grip on his hand.

Levi actually thought about it this time. Perhaps [name] was going to fall asleep, since he looked too tired. “Five minutes.” He answered before sitting down again in the same place, while ignoring how content and happy [name] stupidly looked. Silence filled the room again, but speaking wasn’t necessary for both of them this time.

After such peace, the phone rang. [Name] grunted at the interruption of his sleep, but quickly took the phone before missing the call. The frown that was plastered on his face changed to a soft smile as he answered. Levi narrowed his eyes at such change.

“Hi, Vincent.” [name] replied. “I’m good. Thank you for calling.”

What a good friend.

“It’s fine. Actually, Levi came to—”

Levi snitched the phone out of his hands. Vincent’s voice only fueled his irritation, as his worried questions were heard from the other line.

“What a nice, worried friend you are, Mr. Guard.”

Vincent didn’t answer at first. “Mr. Ackerman, good afternoon.”

Levi could notice Vincent’s change of tone. Well, the feeling was mutual.

“No need for such cute calls for your boyfriend.”

“If I’m worried about him, then I’ll call.”

Levi gritted his teeth. *“*How daring.”

Levi noticed Vincent was going to make a remark, but he shut himself up before spitting it. The ravenette smirked slightly. At least such guard knew who he was talking to. Due to the lack of an answer, Levi kept speaking.

“You asked, he answered. This is all you’ll get.”

Vincent seemed to rile himself up. "He doesn’t—” But Levi hung up before Vincent could finish. He slammed the phone with such force, that made [name] jump at the noise.

Levi stared knives at the phone, not paying attention to [name]’s stare.

“You don’t like Vincent.” [name] looked at him timidly, speaking softly. Levi did look furious at the call— but [name] was sure Vincent wasn’t the type of person to look for problems. What did make Levi so angry?

“Is that a problem for you?”

[name] frowned. It… wasn’t a problem, but he didn’t like seeing his friend— or confidant? being treated so harshly. He knew Levi could see that, but he knew how Levi acted. The people in the asylum could be really… spiteful. Either way, the reflective thoughts only soothed him—he was more than tired. Levi waited, but the question was left unanswered. Instead, it was met with soft snores coming from the idiot.

He had fallen asleep at last.

Levi glared at him—how could he be sleeping so comfortably with him in the room? Leci here, acting like a good guy only fueled his anger. There had to be a reward for this absurdity. He didn’t comprehend his own feelings—their meaning. After all, he hadn’t needed them in a long time, if ever. [name] made him repulsed by such foolish emotions.

How bitter you are.

[Name] didn’t mean to last in that place, but Erwin and four eyes sought any ways to protect him from all evil. Even so, they themselves were worse than the subjects. Levi laughed bitterly internally every time one of them couldn’t hide their desire to possess such a good-for-nothing assistant. He couldn’t understand wholly, but now he saw why. But ‘liking’ him? It wasn’t that. It was something else, but Levi still couldn’t comprehend. He should, soon enough.

Levi glanced at [name], waiting for the moment to move.

And, just when he noticed [Name] fell into a deep slumber, the devil returned.

Levi couldn't stop himself. There was just this urge.

Shifting his body slowly to not interrupt his companion's sleep, facing him. He stared at [name]'s body; how his chest moved according to his breathing, how his lips slightly opened as gentle, barely audible snores came out of his mouth—his long eyelashes, his relaxed, cute expression... only for him to see.

Levi's hand slowly moves under [name]'s shirt, gently caressing his warm stomach. He moved his touch on [name]'s waist this time, grabbing and squeezing part of the flesh not too harshly. The ravenette waited for a response, but just as he was met with silence, he continued his secret exploration in quietness. This time, he rested his head on the crock of [name]'s neck, smelling his scent. His hand explored the flesh a bit more daringly, slowly crawling his way to reach [name]'s chest, the tips of his fingers exploring the flesh cautiously.

This time [name] whimpered softly, his body shivering for one second. The ravenette waited for any other reaction or complaint, but [name] remained in his slumber with a troubled expression adorning his face.

Levi smirked.

What a reward.


Tags
5 years ago

Flower Curse | A. Confess

levi's ending

[levi x male!reader x erwin] vomiting; hanahaki disease, angst. summary: you loved him. he didn’t. everything goes downhill when suddenly, you cough a petal when you think of him. A. Confess.

You decide to confess— straight and direct. Hiding would not save your ass, and you don't think your feelings will change anytime soon. So the best thing you think will be better is just being honest. What could go wrong? He saying no and you dying? Well, yeah. But better try and do it quicker.

So that's what you are going to do. Passing a hand through your hair, you sigh, trying to calm your nerves. Walking through the halls, greeting the soldiers and higher ranks while they pass you. It's been a busy week, thanks for the expedition coming up.

Standing in front of his door, you compose yourself before knocking. Would he be irritated right now? Would it be a good idea to do it later? No! Do it now— you have the guts to do it now, and you will. Everything will be alright. Just tell your feelings and wait for his response— easy.

Nervously knocking, you try to control your breathing and stop blushing, both tasks failing. Hearing a voice saying, "come in" makes you shiver, and you follow the order. Opening the door, you shyly enter the office, averting the ravenette's gaze.

"Ah, [Name]. What now?" He asks, writing something on a paper.

Gulping, you answer, "I wanted to tell you something important." You play with your hands, still not looking at him.

He raises a brow, looking expectantly at you. Waiting for you to go on but only hearing mumbling makes him irritated, so he slightly raises his voice, "What is it?"

Jumping a little in surprise, you try your best to say it clear and clean, closing your eyes. You wish for the best. "I know you like someone else, but I really like you!" There, you said it as clear as you could— was it enough? God, did you just sound like a teenager?

You waited for a response before opening your eyes, but it never came. There was only silence, so you slowly opened your eyes to finally see him.

His eyes were widened with his mouth slightly opened. He stopped writing whatever he was on the paper, looking at you in disbelief. But just as you quickly saw it, it disappeared, leaving his usual frown, but you felt something different about him... Something... gentle.

Gulping, your negative thoughts came back once again. You knew this wasn't a good idea— your guts were telling you that since the very beginning. What were you thinking? You could feel the flowers waking up, trying to get out. Quickly, you tried fixing this hot mess, "I—I just wanted to tell you that. I know you don't feel the same, so don't say anything..." You were stupid, very stupid. Averting his gaze, you quickly look for the door handle, but a sudden noise of someone moving stops you, along with his voice.

“Where do you think are you going?” He asks, and you feel he is smirking. You froze on the spot, with your hand on the door handle. You don’t want to see him— you can feel your cheeks blushing and your mind clouding. “Look at me.”

You don’t obey the command right away. Gulping, you try to say something— think something clearly, but nothing came. You tried to make the flowers stay inside. Still frozen in the same place, you can hear footsteps approaching you. Shit— was he going to punch you? Kick you? Laugh at you? No, he wouldn’t… right?

“I said,” he grabs your shoulder, making you turn and look at him, “look at me.”

Your nervous gaze shifts on his face and averts it at the same time. You knew your face was all red— and you actually saw a smirk appear on his face by the looks of your face. You were sweating, mumbling, trying to say anything.

He just looks at your blubbering mess; your blushed face and notice how your hands shake. The ravenette is actually surprised by your demeanor— the sight of you like this wasn’t that regular, sadly. He actually enjoys seeing you flustered like this, and knowing he is the reason of it is even better.

If it weren’t for this sudden confession out of nowhere, Levi would never have caught your feelings for him. So that’s why you were this quiet lately. He thought, still looking at you. He always tried to stay away from feelings like this— loving someone seemed just not possible in the current situation. Nevertheless, he actually thought about you and him being like that.

He sighs, closing his eyes. Trying to think clearly, he stays silent. Does he feel the same? Could he be with you like that? Well, he couldn’t deny how pleasant is your company, even if he didn’t say it out loud. He liked the sound of your laugh, and even if the two of you stayed far apart in the expeditions, he always watched over you until you disappeared with your squad on the field. And just as the expedition finishes, he can’t stop the feeling to look immediately for you, feeling relieved when he sees you safe and sound. He knew you were capable of protecting yourself and others, but the sudden feel of look for you at all times don’t go away, even if he knows it’s impossible for you to die.

He likes when your hands accidentally touches each other when you both try to grab the pot, he likes cleaning your messy face when you eat like a child, he likes the comfortable talks you two have in the nights, and even if you don’t have a topic of conversation, he doesn’t mind the silence. The ravenette admits being disappointed by the lack of conversations lately; he didn’t like the empty feeling that stayed when you didn’t look for him.

Could he feel the same way?

Actually, yes, he could.

Opening his eyes, he sees you a little more relaxed than before. Your cheeks are now slightly reddish, and you are patiently looking at him. He likes— no, loves the sight of you. He can feel something warm on his chest when he looks at you. He notices the closeness and his urges surfaces, making him look at you in another way he didn’t think he could.

Before you could say anything, you can see him coming closer to you, instantly feeling something soft on your lips, making your eyes widened.

He smirks at your surprise and takes the lead, grabbing your collar and pulling you against him, making you two closer. You just stay in total surprise, your mind doesn’t give you any orders and you are frozen in place. The only thing you could do was grab his shoulders to steadying yourself.

The feeling was hot, you knew your face was red again. The ravenette was doing all the work here, fiercely kissing you before breaking the session, catching both of your breaths.

He smirks, “Does that answer any questions?” The ravenette asks, looking expectantly at you. Seeing you this flustered made him certainly warm, but he tried his best to stay in place. “I told you before I cared more than them, right, idiot?”

And immediately, any feel of discomfort left you. The flowers surprisingly disappeared, and you could breathe normally again.

Were you cured?

The sudden action left you surprised, but knowing he felt the same, you quickly mimicked his actions, by his amusement. He just deeply chuckled, and took the lead once again.

Yes, he truly loved you.

After that pleasant moment, Levi and you became close once again. Your friends noticed the closeness between the two of you, Erwin being the first one. He seemed calmer by how things turned out for the both of you, not before giving you a strange look you couldn’t decipher at all. You ignored it, seeing his smile, but slightly tensed form. And unknowingly by you, he stayed in silence when you left, sighing before mumbling,

“Too late.”

Hange was excited and happy for the surprise you gave her, along with Moblit who only sighed in relief. The woman only just jumped like a little child, happy by the events. You laughed, feeling warm at the sight of your friends.

Unfortunately, you feeling better weren’t good news for everybody.

A certain girl could see both of your hands touch beneath the table in the mess hall, unknown by everyone but her. She could see the kisses when you two thought being alone. She could see the closeness between the two of you. She could see everything.

She could feel something blooming inside her lungs, making her unable to breath.

Little Petra could only look in horror as flowers came out from her throat.

Aren't you happy?

Are you satisfied with the choice you made?


Tags
4 years ago
+32° 37’ 39.72”, +129° 44’ 17.73” Abandoned Buildings On Ha Island, Japan

+32° 37’ 39.72”, +129° 44’ 17.73” abandoned buildings on ha island, japan

5 years ago

I don’t know if you’re still active but I just want to say I love your writing. Very few works have nearly brought me to tears like your hanahaki disease fic did. Very well done. Your work is amazing!

Thank you sooo much!! 😭😭😭😭 you don’t know how happy your words made me. Thank you! Maybe it’s a little weird, but I’m happy to read you cried by reading my work. I truly believe that when I tried to be more angsty, it actually looked ridiculous and cringy. Again, thank you for words! Actually, I’m focused more on a (very) dark themed work called “Reiss Mental Asylum”, a yandere harem with aot characters! You can read it on my quotev, ao3 and wattpad! (I added my links!) I’ve been trying to publish it here, but my phone crashes tumblr a lot!! ;_; I traveled, so I don’t have a computer to publish them sooner… ;;;;

5 years ago

Reiss Mental Asylum / 9

【 shingeki no kyojin / mental asylum – alternative universe, modern setting 】 『male!yandere!various x male!prettyboy!reader』 summary: Finally! You have been given an opportunity to work at Reiss Mental Asylum- your job hunting hasn’t been great, so to hear you got an opportunity made you excited. At the beginning everything seems normal- but without noticing, some people began to get obsessed with you. warnings/tags: DARK/HEAVY THEMES. Non-consensual themes; sexual assault, touching, drug use, rape attempt. Home invasion, yanderes, obsessive behavior, murder, blood, explicit content, sexual thoughts. masterlist

[Name] was leaving his apartment. While locking his door, he heard a male voice calling for him from behind. He turned to see his neighbor, Porco, with his usual frown.

"Hello, [Name]." He greets grumpily; [Name] knows Porco isn't a morning person. Nevertheless, he's very responsible for his work.

[Name] smiles, "Good morning, Porco! Leaving already?"

"Nothing good about mornings," he passes a hand trough his hair, irritated. "They want me already in the office. Pieck called me 5 on the fucking morning."

[Name] chuckles, "sad to hear that. What was the reason? It's not usual they call you this early."

"Late work and deadlines. The usual," he looks at the [hair color] haired male for a couple of seconds, and his face relax, "but anyways, how is the work have been? Haven't seen you lately."

[Name]'s face lightened up by hearing his work, a smile appears on his gentle face. Porco raises an eyebrow by seeing this, "It has been good! Everyone helps me! But— uhm—" [Name] gets quiet suddenly when he remembers some certain... problems he has been trough. 

A frown appears on the blond's face, carefully watching [Name]. "But what?" He asks, but his petite friend doesn't speak. Porco analyzes him, but then rapidly connects the dots of his quiet behavior. Gritting his teeth, he lowly grunts, "is someone bothering you? Tell me."

[Name] shakes his head hastily, moving his hands in front of him in denial. "No, no! That's not it— it's just that I'm a little clumsy, that's all!" He laughs nervously.

Porco relaxed a little by hearing his words, but his frown remained and crossed his arms. He carefully looked at his friend, who played with his hands and avoided his gaze. "If someone is bothering you or anything, just let me know. I will take care of it."

[Name] scratches his neck, shyly. The [hair color] haired knew he could count with Porco in almost everything. His neighbor was a good friend— he cared about him a lot. Porco was a serene and short of words kind of person at first when [Name] first arrived, but the blond quickly warmed up to him. If [Name] was scared by hearing things in the night, he could always count on Porco accompany him or help him search so he could sleep.

"Thank you, Porco. I really appreciate it." [Name] brightly smiles, but changes his kind expression to a toothy smile, furrowing his eyebrows, trying to look tough, "if someone is bothering you too, I will pay them a visit too!" He raises his fist.

Well, [Name] looked stupidly cute trying to act tough. Porco couldn't hold a chuckle from coming out, making [Name] blush in embarrassment. The [hair color] haired laughed nervously, scratching his neck and dropping his "tough" act.

"Sure thing, doll." The blond calms his laughs, "anyways, where are you working at?" he changed the subject, feeling more relaxed.

"Reiss Mental Asylum. It's a little far away from here but—"

"WHERE?!" Porco loudly yells, eyes widening in horror, scaring and making [Name] yelp, "in the asylum?! [Name], WHAT?!"

"i—is there a problem with it? Everyone is nice there! I—I mean—"

"[Name]! You— that— that fucking place is—" before Porco could finish, a cellphone ringing could be heard coming from his pocket. The blond grunted in annoyance and took it, "what?!" he harshly answered, gritting his teeth. 

[Name] awkwardly stood there, hearing Porco's yells and swearing against his cellphone. 

"Goddammit, Pieck! Right now I–" looks like he's interrupted, and he rubs his temples, "alright, alright! I will fucking go— Just tell Colt and the others to not touch shit. Yes, yes whatever," saving his cellphone, he sighs. He looks at [Name], still with his frown, "you and I will talk later. Can't believe you are in that fucking place."

[Name] hastily nods in return, "s—sure! But when...?"

Porco is already hurriedly leaving, "will phone you later." But he abruptly stops, remembering something. He turns to see [Name], raising an eyebrow, "did you take your lunch?"

The pretty male gently scratches his cheek with his index finger, a little embarrassed by his clumsiness. "I didn't make any..."

"You are so clumsy." He approaches [Name] and gives him a box, red painting his cheeks, "take mine and don't speak. Just— just take care of yourself, alright?" Porco seems to want to say something else but refrains to. Nevertheless, he blushes and frowns, averting [Name]'s gaze. "Call me for anything."

"Sure, Porco! You too!" [Name] laughs to try and lighten the mood, and he certainly does. Porco rolls his eyes and chuckles before leaving, and when he's out of [Name]'s sight, his face returns to his worried face. Porco won't have a good day at work, it seems.

++++++++++++

[Name] was just arriving to the asylum, he was called by a female voice. Looking up, he is meet with Margaret's unfamiliar gaze on him.

"Honey, good morning. Dr. Smith is calling for your presence in his office, I think it would be better if you go right away." She explains, and the assistant can catch her shifting uncomfortably when mentioning the last sentence. Margaret sounded... urgent by the order— not the usual, "take your time" tone.

Blinking, watching her carefully, he tried to deduce what caused her to tense, but he couldn't decide right away. He just answered with a quiet 'alright' and left, a little nervous himself. If the woman was this strange, then maybe director was in a... certain mood. 

The woman sighed. She didn't want to scare him or make him anxious, but her face and tone betrayed her away. 

Dr. Smith could be a scary man when he wanted.

++++++++++

The assistant knocked on the door gently, hearing a 'who?' from the other side. The voice sounded deep and irritated— gulping, [Name] nervously answered:

"[Name] [Last Name], sir..."

There was an immediate answer. "Come in."

[Name] anxiously opened the door, pecking inside before coming in. Erwin was sitting straight, looking right at the small male, carefully as a hawk. [Name] just stands there awkwardly, trying to not see Erwin in the eyes. He says a quiet and pathetic 'good morning', then plays with his fingers, gulping. Erwin didn't look particularly relaxed nor in a good mood— he hummed, [Name] shivering a little by the deep sound. 

"I received a notification yesterday— Eren Jaeger attacked you during your session. Is that correct?" Erwin's voice is loud and clear-- but if you listened closely, the blond's voice was filled with bitter. He was absolutely furious about what happened, but the assistant couldn't tell his anger; only irritation.

Gulp. [Name] tries to explain, clumsily. "Y—Yes but—"

"What did he do?" Erwin clenches his teeth, holding his anger from showing. He had to take it easyー [Name] won't stay away this time if he controls it.

"It's— it's nothing serious, sir! We just—" [Name] keeps trying, and he can see how Erwin is changing— he tries to protect Eren, but he knows he can't succeed. 

He slowly stands, voice dangerously lowering as he carefully watches [Name], "what did he do?"

A shiver gets down [Name] spine. The blond's voice wasn't the usualー it was getting lower and dangerous. "He just- grabbed me by my collar. t-that's all." [Name] was wearing a turtle neck shirt today— if not, his bruise that looked purplish and slightly yellowish could be more noticeable— Porco would have been nuts, and maybe Erwin too. 

The taller man narrows his eyes, examining the assistant from head to toe. "Any injuries?"

[Name] played with his hands nervously, averting his gaze, "n—no, sir..."

Unfortunately for [Name], Erwin knew everything about what had happened in that room. And he didn't like one a bit that –his– [Name] wasn't telling him the truth. Why wouldn't he? Why was he lying to him? What was the purpose of that?

Erwin clenched his fist, and a frown could be noticed by now. [Name] was nervous and frightened by the cold expression the other had. Erwin's patience was running out quickly. "That wasn't what I heard. Show me your neck."

Unconsciously, the assistant placed a hand near the bruise, trying to prevent the other from seeing it. "M—My neck? But I—"

Erwin's patience snapped— the man immediately approached [Name] and pulled his collar down harshly, by the big surprise of the poor assistant. His cheeks blushed in embarrassment, but the blond couldn't enjoy such view because his rage was blinding him by the bruise decorating –his– boy's skin. 

The man wanted to snap Eren's neck with his own hands.

"He will be punished." Erwin coldly said, caressing [Name]'s bruise while looking at itー he wanted to cover that horrible mark with new ones, made from him. To think such a disgusting beast touched him... angers him, disgusts him. 

"No!" [Name] abruptly yelled, surprising Erwin. "Don't, Erwin!"

The blond frowned, trying to ignore how good it felt hearing his name being said, "he will be. It's against the rules to harm a worker; he knows that very well, [Name]."

"I know but— he was just stressed! He just followed his emotions, don't do anything to him, please!"

Erwin stayed in silence. His anger was raisingー why was [Name] protecting a rat like Jaeger? It was foolish. No matter what he says he will punishー

"Please, Erwin!"

Shit— hearing him plead was hot. And hearing his name along the pleading was an absolute joy. Erwin's thoughts began to be messy, and his whole body felt warm quickly— specially in his lower area. 

It wasn't any help that the previous male in front of him was looking at him so pleadingly, grabbing his hands so softly. It was making Erwin insane, and if the man wasn't that good holding himself, he may have been doing something entirely different right now. 

He couldn't stop imagining –his– [Name] under him, admiring the perfect and small body— the soft skin being marked by him. The gasps and moans the [hair color] haired would let out; the flustered expression Erwin would love to see. How tight would he be? How much would he plead? Erwin wanted to find out as soon as possible.

"E—Erwin...?"

The blond blinked. Looking at [Name], he noticed his hands were on the small waist, slowly wandering. The assistant's hands were on his chest, trying to make space; his cheeks were slightly reddish and a confused expression was on his face. He looked adorable; gorgeous. 

Erwin had a strong urge to keep touching him— to rip his clothes and take him over his desk. To hear his voice moan his name while he thrusts over and over...

"Erwin~!"

"What would you do for him to not be punished?" Erwin dangerously spoke, lowering his voice, sounding raspy and gruffly. He took [Name] chin gently, looking at his pretty [eye color] eyes, admiring the long eyelashes he hadー he was just like a doll. A doll he will posses. 

[Name] tried to answer confidently, showing a cute face unconsciously. "A–Anything necessary!"

"Uhm?" Erwin smiles amused, raising an eyebrow, "anything is a dangerous word." He touches his lower lip with his thumb, trying to ignore the demons whispering on his ear— telling him to give in and tear apart [Name] clothes right there, exposing his perfect skin— to touch it, to mark it.

The assistant doesn't pay much attention to the clear dirty moves the blonde is making. Somehow, [Name] gets more determined by remembering his purpose as a doctor, and his answer is less clumsy now. "My patients are important to me!"

"Is that so..." Erwin's hands began to slowly wander around [Name]'s waist, confusing the assistant. The blond grits his teeth, trying to hold himself. Nevertheless, he slowly approached [Name]'s soft lips, trying to taste themー their lips just inches from touching. Erwin's hands tightly hold [Name]'s waist in anticipationー just a little more and he would taste his beautiful ー

"Erwin...?"

The blond grunted, irritated by the interruption, again. "Slow. You just got his trust recently— take it slow." Erwin thought, sighing in disappointment. He makes space, rubbing his temples, "will think for your punishment instead, hmn?"

[Name] blinks, confused by the whole moment. Thankfully he focus again to answer, "Ah! Y-Yes!"

"But if someone else touches you again, I will not be as forgiving, got it?" Erwin carefully looks at [Name], and the assistant happily nods, thanking him. The blond smiles, turning to his desk, "that's all. You can return to your work, [Name]."

The pretty male smiles brightly, thanking him again before leaving. Erwin stops smiling and sits, looking down at the bulge forming in his pants. Just thinking about [Name] was a blissー his perfect body under him, grabbing his naked tights hard; leaving marks on them while he thrusts [Name] over and over, hearing his sweet voice moaning his name...

"What have you done to me?"

++++++++

After that, the assistant walked through the corridors trying to find one of the therapy rooms. Once again he found himself alone— Zeke had important matters to attend in the higher floors, where [Name] couldn't go freely unless it was Eren's or Reiner's session or if Zeke needed his assistance. He didn't mind anyways— the alarms up there were heard often, seeing nurses and guards hurrying upstairs. He didn't want to get himself into trouble, so he hold his curiosity and didn't pry.

Finally spotting his destined place, he couldn't not notice the familiar brunette, Vincent, standing with another guard near the door. The male instantly saw him, giving him a big grin, which the assistant laughed quietly by it. 

"Good morning," [Name] happily greeted, receiving a hum from the other guard and a loud morning! from Vincent. The assistant remembered he always was paired with different guards— not these two. Confused, he questioned. "Weren't there other guard in my time? N—Not that I mind, of course!"

"I told you I was going to be your bodyguard, [Name]!" Vincent jokingly pouted, looking like a child, before changing into a serious expression."Anyways, didn't you heard? They dis—"

"Hey!" The other guard immediately yelled to the two, making them jump, "my apologies, doctor, but we can't share that information with you. Orders from the directors."

"Ah! I forgot that, sorry..." Vincent frowns, as if he remembers something he didn't like. 

[Name] blinks, confused. He didn't understand why the information wasn't available for him. After all, they were his coworkers too. "Orders...? From who exactly?"

"We... can't say, sorry." Vincent answered this time, looking apologetic. 

[Name], seeing as he wasn't going to get any answers, decided to leave the topic and go to the session. Taking the door handle, he said, "A—Alright... see you in a hour..."

The brunette grins, loudly saying, "Don't forget our date!"

"Don't say it that loud!" [Name] blushed, quickly entering the room, ignoring Vincent's laugh. 

The other guard, seeing the assistant leaving, he says, "Dating him will give you trouble, man, I'm telling ya."

Vincent keep smiling without caring, looking dreamy. If he was honest, he didn't mind getting into trouble if that meant being with him. His companion could see that, worrying him. 

"Look at what happened to Jin and Roman, Vincent. That wasn't a coincidence." He tried to reason with him, but it was with no avail. Vincent didn't hear him at all— and that frustrated him. He sighed in defeat, "you are a thick head."

++++++++++++++

The room was pretty big— it was all white, and the only source of color was the paintings and utensils. There was a noticeable smell of paint, but not that strong to be uncomfortable. Various canvas placed in a circle, along with chairs and a little table to put on the painting instruments. There was a wooden desk facing all the patients, where an instructor was boringly watching them. It was quiet.

The room wasn't full— there were only twelve canvases and only six were occupied. And two of them were used by Armin and Jean, his' previous patients. And when [Name] entered the room, Armin instantly saw him and his face lightened up, stopping his actions to pay full attention to the angel. Jean, in the other hand, was grateful that he appeared, as he was bored with the therapeutic session.

"Good morning," [Name] greeted with a smile, receiving a flat answer from the worker and some patients. He made his way to Armin and Jean, who both were sitting side by side. His smile grew at seeing them, "hello! How is your paintings going?"

Jean was instantly going to make a remark, but Armin was quick to excitedly answer first, surprising Jean by the sudden action. 

"I'm painting the ocean! Look!" He said like a child, proud of his work, wanting it to show to his mother. But his tone changed to a timid one, "What do you think?"

[Name] gets behind Armin and lowers himself a little to see the painting, while the blond's heart is beating so fast by how near he can feel him. He can smell his sweet scent: honey and flowers. 

Would he taste as good as he smells? 

Being so close,  Armin can admire how beautiful he is— his lips, his neck... 

Uh? 

The blonde blinks, noticing something... different. Something darker can be seen just slightly under his turtle neck. What is that?

While Armin tries to secretly look under the turtle neck while [Name] is admiring how the painting is beautifully done. It makes him feel calm, looking at the waves and puffy clouds— but he notices two people looking at the ocean, but he can't distinguish who they are —if they are somebody—.

"Who are they?" [Name] suddenly asks, surprising Armin and making him jump, forgetting about what he was trying to see secretively.

The blond gulped nervously, blushing but smiling, "...you and me."

The [hair color] haired blinks surprised, but quickly smiles warmly at the adorable words. "That's nice of you, Armin. Your painting is beautiful!"

The blonde plays with his hands nervously, crimson painting his cheeks. He blurts rather loudly, timid but brightly. "M—Maybe... We can go together... to the ocean!"

[Name] blinks for a moment, but smiles warmly. He pats Armin’s head gently and promises, "we will!"

Armin smiles, looking dreamy. 

Jean just looks at Armin as if he’s crazy— never in his life in this shithole he saw the blonde like this. He wasn’t like this, not even with Mikasa or Eren. He looked... normal, in a way. The blond never smiled nor blushed, or to be exact never showed a reaction such as this.

What did just this pretty assistant do to him?

"And you, Jean?" [Name] questions with a smile, but instantly ask again as he sees his painting— a black haired girl, and his curiosity grows, "who's that? your girlfriend?"

He slightly blushes, already forgetting his past thoughts, "of course not! She's just—"

"Eren's sister." Armin interrupts, smiling maliciously at Jean.

[name] blinks, "...E—Eren's sister?" Just the name shook him— he tried to not care too much, but Eren was... He did scare him badly even if he tried not to. He shivered a little, remembering the past interaction.

The two catch immediately the change of behavior— it was noticeable. The assistant was smiling just a second ago, and just by mentioning Eren, he changed. His expression changed drastically to a worried one. 

"It's something wrong?" Jean frowns, cautiously watching [Name]. The two toned haired male didn’t even try to joke— a change like that wasn’t normal by just a name.

Unconsciously, [Name] touches his neck, remembering his bruises. "Uhm..." He's upset— hearing him calling him whore. It did hurt him. But he blinks repeatedly, looking at the two patients looking at him in worry. The assistant harshly shakes his head, trying to smile. "It's nothing! I'm fine!!".

They looked at each other weirdly, but before they could ask for his well being again, [Name]  changed the topic quickly.

"Anyways! How do you know her?"

"She visits Eren," Jean half answers, seeing [Name] tense by the name again, and proceed, "and Armin a lot. Looks like a threesome."

"I will never do something like that with them.” Armin answers quickly, looking rather angry and insulted. 

Nevertheless, Jean catches something in his words and grins, “with them? Ohoho, so there’s somebody you rather have sex with?” 

The assistant’s cheeks turn red by the turn of topic, and tries to stop him, “Jean, please stop. That’s not nice topic at all.” He shakes his head in disappointment, Jean just grins.

Surprising enough, Armin didn't back off with the dirty question. He answered as if the answer was obvious, taking [Name] and Jean aback. "Of course— with the person I love the most."

"Is that so? And who is this "loved one" if it isn't Eren nor Mikasa?"

"Obviously it's [Name]."

...

...

...

WHAT?!

[Name]'s face had to be priceless because Jean was holding his laugh and amazement as best as he could, but being the asshole he is he laughed loudly. The assistant just blinked and blushed deeply, surprised by the answer he just heard. Covering his mouth, he had nothing to say at that.

"Really? The assistant?" Jean laughed, out of breath. He couldn't think of Armin and [Name] being together at all— what did the blondie saw in him anyways? 

Were his soft lips, gentle eyes, perfect skin that got him captivated?

Or maybe just thinking about his caring attitude that made Armin love him?

Just as Jean was thinking these unusual thoughts, his laughter stopped, and a soft crimson painted his cheeks. He looked the other way, rethinking his opinions on the assistant.

Well, Armin has some taste I guess...

"I-I'm... uhm..." [Name] didn't know what to say or think, but he could see Armin patiently waiting for his answer. "I'm... flattered, Armin. But a relationship as this can't be! It's-It's against the rules!" the [hair color] haired tried to reason without sounding harsh, worried about his feelings or how he was going to react.

Smiling, the blond didn't care at all of what he was saying, the only thing he was happy for is that he didn't say no. "That doesn't matter, [Name], love is stronger than the rules." Just remembering the books he read before taught him that love always preserves. Always.

While [Name] was thinking on how to fix the situation, thankfully, a bell could be heard, indicating the current task was finished. He sighed in relief, and he quickly tried to leave the place. "W-Well, that's my que to leave! I hope you finish your paintings. Have a great morning!" And with that, he left in a hurry.

Neither of the two remaining said or do anything. Armin was smiling with an unusual expression on his face, looking at the door where [Name] left.

Jean just kept quiet, thinking about his new opinions on the assistant. He felt like a school girl out of nowhere. Was he... rethinking his feelings for him? No way.

++++++++++++

Walking trough the halls, [Name] was glad that awkward moment was over. He wasn't good at all at rejecting people's feelings on him, so he dodging was the best thing he could do.

Vincent was with him, chatting quite excited. The guard had waited for him to guide him to the cafeteria, and [Name] was happy by just talking to him, forgetting his thoughts. Unfortunately, Vincent got a call from his radio, saying they needed him in the upper floor. He just winked at the assistant ready to leave, not before saying he had to be ready for his date. [Name] only blushed, embarrassed by it.

He walked alone again, gaze locked on the floor.

"[Name]." A stoic voice was heard, and the assistant looked in front of him, seeing Levi standing there with his hands on his bags, looking at him. He smiled, waving at the ravenette, approaching him excited. "Adorable." 

"Levi! Hello!" [Name] stood beside Levi, getting his hair behind his ear. "Where's Mike?"

Levi's eye twitched, getting unnoticed by [Name]. "Busy upstairs." He quickly said, walking without waiting for the assistant.

Quickly following him, Levi says they are going to the cafeteria. [Name] walks along with him, chatting and laughing with him.

The short man just listens, comfortable in [Name]'s presence.

+++++++++++

Levi, getting his food to the table, was surprised to see a red box [Name] took with him as well.

"Finally you made your food, brat." Levi said, giving a bite to his food, looking at the well made food the other had— it looked like a house wife did it. Rice, carrots... octopus-looking sausage? 

He blushed and smiled, shaking his head in denial. "I—I didn't make it! My neighbor gave it to me!"

Levi narrowed his eyes instantly, changing his mood to a bitter one, "gave it?" The thought of someone making him food made him highly suspicious— was that person interested in him? Well, that could be obvious. This looked like a school confession, making food for your crush. 

The thought only irritated him.

But why? Why did something that unimportant got him upset?

"Yeah! He's really nice." [Name] smiled brightly, crimson painting his cheeks.

The only sight of him smiling for someone else's cooking disgusted him.

Why?

Levi's appetite disappeared, the food didn't taste good no more, so he just sipped his tea, thinking about the assistant. He couldn't explain it, but something inside him wasn't happy at all with someone gifting him things freely, even more when this neighbor was just at his side.

"Ah! Excuse me," [Name] said when he heard the particular ringtone —that he added specially for Porco—, and answered it. He didn't know it, but his face lightened by just recognizing who it was. 

That, made Levi narrow his eyes suspiciously.

"Porco, hello!" [Name] smiled, "yeah, everything is okay! Stop worrying!" He laughs hearing the other answer and replies, "don't worry. Anyways, how's work? Did you send it in time?"

While the conversation occurred, Levi couldn't stop feeling... strange. He wasn't happy by seeing [Name] this excited by just a call —of who knows who—, he was irritated. Unconsciously he crossed his arms and frowned— a sudden thought of taking the phone and demanding answers was strong, but refrained to do so. 

Levi's thoughts were getting darker, and he ignored every sound around him. He looked at nothing in particular with a frown, not happy at all with where is thoughts were going.

Nevertheless, [Name] returned, the call being finished.

"Who was it?" Levi carefully inspected [Name] face to see any hint of emotion— and he certainly caught how happy the other was by his smile.

"It was my neighbor! He wanted to go out." He happily answered, taking bites of his food.

"Neighbor? The same as your age you mentioned the other day?" Levi could faintly remember him talking about it, but he thought it was a nobody. Seems that changed.

"Exactly! I haven't been able to talk to him much, so I'm glad he called me." 

"What was the call for?"

"Oh, we're meeting this friday! He has a busy schedule but made way for it."

Levi gritted his teeth and clenched his fist, tightly. He felt something burning inside him by hearing the other spoke about that 'neighbor'. A date? With someone he doesn't even know?

The ravenette tried his best to calm down, he breathed slowly, rubbing his temples. [Name] noticed he was tensed, and worried him, "Are you alright? You look... angry...?"

"I'm fine." He answered shortly.

The two ate in an awkward silence.

+++++++

Work was over for [Name]. He quickly went to the exit, ready to leave the building. But before he could open the door, someone called from him— turning, he saw Levi.

"I'm going to take you home today." He awkwardly said, with his usual frown. Even if he tried sounding soft, it always came rather harsh, but he hoped [Name] got the idea.

The assistant frowned, "Oh, I'm sorry, Levi. But I'm not going to my apartment right away."

"I can drop you off to wh—"

"[Name]! Ready to go?" A new voice was heard, and Levi turned to see Vincent, the semi-new guard they hired the other week. The ravenette grew suspicious of his words, and he raised an eyebrow, looking at [Name], who only smiled apologetic at him. "Oh, am I interrupting something?"

"I was just telling Levi I'm going with..." [Name] blushed, trying to say whatever he was trying to say without feeling embarrassed, "you on a date right now."

Levi's eye twitched in annoyance. Just— the fuck? How— how this guy could get a "date" with [Name]? AND before him? He bet this disgusting guy was even going to try and kiss him if he let him.

"Levi...?"

"Fine. See you tomorrow." The ravenette harshly spoke, leaving the building before anyone could say something else. If Levi was another minute there, he would get more irritated and angry, and he didn't want to scare [Name] off. 

But he had to make him understand one day.

+++++++++++

Vincent and [Name] were having a good time at the coffee shop— they were chatting and laughing together. The guard even brushed [Name]’s hand sometimes, making the smaller male blush a little and awkwardly chuckle. The taller male sometimes complimented him with the only purpose to see him blush and act adorable.

It was obvious Vincent was attracted to [Name].

It was clear for Levi, at least. 

He could see them all the way from his parked car, far away from the coffee shop, where the two love-bird were sitting, beside a window where the ravenette could watch them.

He was furious and jealous, even if he didn’t want to admit it. Gripping the wheel tightly, Levi clenched his teeth. A murderous gaze was plastered all over his face.

He couldn’t accept the fact that this disgusting man touching his beautiful love.

      Love? That’s how he feel towards him...? Love...? Was he lovesick? How? It was if... a love spell was sent to him. He wanted to touch the soft skin, smell his hair, have him on his arms, do whatever he wanted with him.

Levi wanted [Name] to be his completely.

He only had to clear his way and win this game.


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2 years ago

I want to read your "Kisses [Various x Male!Prettyboy!Reader]" but seems like there's no URL found.... I was searching the title on your page but none appeared.. May i ask for you to send the link when you post my ask? Thank you in advance!

hi! i made it private in most of my accounts but my ao3, so you can read it there! spoiler alert: is cringe and horrible T0T but go ahead ;w;

also, i know this ask is old as hell. im very sorry!


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3 years ago

Just wanted to say I miss u and ur works. I also hope you’re doing better & wishing u the best of luck 💗💗

that felt nice to read (ᴗ_ ᴗ。) i do miss all of you, so i'm going to try and not disappear again. thank you v much and have a good day!! ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ


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5 years ago

Will u ever make a 2nd fic of save us all??? I’m so intrigued about how it ends!! (sorry if that sentence didn’t make sense- englis is hard :( )

ow! dont worry  your english is perfectly fine! <3

i didn’t think to continue it, but if you want a second part i’m sure i can make one! i left the ending really vague, so maybe i can do a closure in the second part ^__^

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n0irrrr - gnossienne.
gnossienne.

【male/gn!reader fanfiction ☆ mostly attack on titan 】hiatus ; reqs into consideration ٩( 'ω' )و٩( 'ω' )وenglish's not my first language, expect trash, self-indulgent writing ☆24

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