Something That Distubrs Me A Lot Is How The Author Of Lolita

She/Hurts [Transfem Lucy M. Montgomery fic]

This is a REALLY old transfemme lucy fic I wrote, but I didn't really want it to go to waste, so here it is :) Note that it is poorly written and a few of my headcanons may have changed since the writing of this.

It's really short, completely SFW, and I can't think of any TWs that would apply (please tell me if there's anything I misses, though). Please enjoy <33

He/him/his: the most dreaded words in the world, to Lucy Maud Montgomery.

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   He/him/his: the most dreaded words in the world, to Lucy Maud Montgomery. Even if she hadn't been referred to by them since her days in the orphanage, before she joined The Guild, the thought of being known as them again always caused bile to rise in her throat.

She began questioning her identity at a young age. She remembered standing in front of a bedroom mirror in nothing but undergarments after a haircut she had when she was about eight years of age. She felt... "icky", as she would describe the feeling to her imaginary friends.

She often stood in front of the mirror before she dressed, her eyelids red and swollen from minutes of purely tears and sobs, dreading the day ahead of her for a plethora of reasons.

She didn't understand why she felt the way she did for a long while. She didn't know that the icky, disgusted, and dreadful feeling she had whenever she looked at her body weren't strange, weren't something that made her vile, strange, or freakish, until she was just over fourteen years of age.

She discovered the term 'transgender' on the internet, and she almost instantly felt a sense if closure when she read the definition for the first time. She wasn't alone in despising her natural body and attributes, she wasn't alone in loathing what the world said she was, what she wasn't. She was just as glad when she discovered the term 'pansexual': sexuality without any care for your partner's sex or gender.

But then, she realised the mockery wasn't exclusive to the orphanage. People like her, born physically male, female, or intersex, people who liked the same gender, both, none at all, or any other who didn't fit under the term 'heterosexual' were heavily discriminated against because of who they were.

She didn't understand it at all: "why are people cruel to others for something they had no control over?" she often thought. She'd never understood why you could be cruel to others, for reasons such as those.

But, ah, people. They're often cruel, distasteful creatures. Though at times, they can be accepting and kind.

When Lucy joined the guild in her mid teens, she was was quite surprised when her coworkers were respectful of her thoughts. The first to be told of her fellow members was Louisa.

The younger girl was strangely calm when Lucy told her about her feelings, her thoughts. Alcott suggested that Lucy should tell Fitzgerald, when she was comfortable, so he could perhaps fund or at least help her in the process of getting on HRT, and getting surgeries, if she wanted them.

Lucy, of course, did tell Fitzgerald and her other coworkers eventually. She was happy to find that many of her other coworkers were queer, such as Poe and Alcott, or allies to the community, such as Fitzgerald and Melville.

People often say to make a house a home, and that's just what Lucy did. She made her body feel as though it was truly her own.

OKOKOK

Sooo yk Jessica rabbit I think she'd look exactly like that, and OMGGG SHE'D BE THE JUDGIEST QUEEN EVERRR

She'd brag often that she uses her ACTUAL hair instead of wigs and somehow she'll always be in safe or above (and if she never gets into bottom or loser, and if she ever gets to loser she ALWAYS wins over her competitor)

I think though she wouldn't always win, maybe once or twice (she's very salty about this)

(If you search up season 10 Aquaria win I think that's the outfit she'd wear to get the win :D)

Mori is in this as well !!! HES RU PAULLLL CAUSE THEY LOWK GIVE OFF THE SAME VIBES !!!!!

Higuchi also is a queen, Akutagawa, Kaji, Hirotsu (I'm forgetting the names of the other members but there ALL queens >:3)

I don't think any of this will make sense to anyone who doesn't watch Ru Paul's drag race but ermmm yeah >:3 (if you are gonna watch it, there is quite some inappropriate Queen dances and shit, but the drama 😭😭 anyway, I need to sort this out properly, but hope it's good enough)

(Apart from Eve, cause i know she does😭)

But who wants to hear about my DragChuu au

(I've thought of everything, it's consuming my mind but I can't for the life of me get motivation to draw her😫😫)

yes...yes I am

(I love my moots, you don't understand. Idk how to show my gratitude my other way >:3)

are you gonna give me notifications forveer @localmentallyillwriter

??? ME WHEN SOMEONE I REALLY LIKE STARTS TO FOLLOWS ME ?!??!?!?!

(im terrified, but im giggling and kicking my feet)

Happy birthday!!!!!

(Or early happy birthday idk, I hate timezones😭😭)

heh I’m loved unlike some of you

Lets all give a moment of silence for all the shit left in my inbox that I forgot to answer💔

I wasn't gna post this but erm, sure y'all can have this freaky OdaKida thing ^^

The relationship headcanon generator is actually so fun :3

(I might make a post abt all my Oda and Kunikida hcs :D)

alright buddy, wrap it up we all know your lying

Bro is letting the inner freak slip out🤨🤨🤨🤨

Atsushi: “N-no! I just want to be friends-!..”

PROPERLY SORTED OUT INTO !!!!

HAAIIII !!!!

I finally have energy to actually sort this out, sooo yaey new intro ^^

ME !!!!

On here I primarily go by the name M, but I don't mind any other name someone would want to give me. I'm in the age range of 14-17 (I hate giving my age so much((T_T)) mb) soooo id prefer if people interacting with this blog were around the same age (although I'm not to strict about this, I think i fully draw the line at 12 year olds, mayyybee get of tumblr all together, and I don't mind if your like 60 and interact, as long as your not creepy and you don't dm me ( ＞Д＜；)) Fucking uhh he/him btw (I don't think I'll ever tell someone my Xeno's until I'm super fucking comfortable)

Heres some dm info btw

I would prefer if you didn't tag me in tag games (I don't mind if your tagging me with something on your blog, like a draw you would like me to see, and idk if you don't have anyone to tag in the tag game you can tag me)

I just get overwhelmed pretty easily although I LOVE attention so spam liking/reblogging is alright ^^!

FANDOMSSSS !!!!!

Main ones currently would have to be Bungo Stray Dogs, Sonic, Death Note and Needy Streamer Overload

But I'm also in the FNAF, (idk if there's a fandom but) Sanrio, SpyxFamily, DHMIS, Life Lessons with Uramachi Oniisan, Suicide boy, ENA, Everything but Your Life

LIKES !!!!

FLOWERS !!, Drawing, Writing, My Violin and Guitar(｡-ω-), Water, Sleeping, Reading (specifically classic lit), The rain, Cinamaroll, Cream, Shadow, Mori, Oda, Kunikida, Fukuzawa, Sigma, Chuuya, Ango, Twilight(i cant remeber his non code name lmao), Bonnie, Ryuk, Moony, Dearest >.<

DISLIKES !!!!

Animals, Yelling, People who are doing worse(mentally) than me, Eating, School, Drawing, Writing, Heat/the sun, Being at home, Most people in general, People who call Mori a ped0 (it's not Canon, so your headcanoning something so serious to a silly anime character ??? Creepy as hell tbh)

Extra !!!

I don't really have a DNI list, interact with my blog all you like, just don't talk to me if your creepy or bad. I would like people to know it's safe for people of ANY kind trying to heal, ill support your healing ^^ I don't care if you're a pr0shipper/darksh!pper, as long as your trying to get better ^^ (no I don't support pr0shippers, I support HEALING pr0shippers, and that goes for anyone, I won't support you if your continuing the bad actions, but when you're trying to heal you have my full support)

FAVOURITE SONG RIGHT NOW !!!!

teen party rawr xd! By roshyw (there becoming my favourite artist >.<)

Tags to navigate my blog easier !!!

M's personal - any random yapping

M's drawing - art

M's writing - writing

OdaKida - IM THE CEO OF THEM BTW !!!!

WRITING DETAILS !!!

I will do requests, but if you ever do it might be quite slow, and if there's not enough specifying what you'd like it might be really different to what you'd want. I will write light nsfw (I'm not that good tho, I usually just start laughing and can't bring myself to take writing it seriously) I won't do any kink I'm really uncomfortable with (I think pet play and foot fetishes is really all) and I will NEVER write any romanticisation for sh, suicide, mental health disorders, ped0philia, rap3, SA, z00philia, unhealthy age gaps. Other than that I'll write anything ^^ I'm only good at writing for BSD characters tho, sorry >.< I usually write on my own terms, usually short reader x character things or one shots (if you have more questions js ask ^^)

Drawing details !!!!

I again kinda just draw on my own terms, I would be fine drawing any character tho, and if your character or oc interests me enough I'll most likely draw it anyway. I'm fine with drawing pretty much everything, not heavy gore/nsfw but i can do it lighter. I'm not really sure what my boundaries are tbh, just guess and see if I draw it

WHAT I DO KNOW FOR SURE IS IF YOU TAKE MY WORK AND USE IT FOR AI I WILL BE PUTTING YOU IN A BLENDER, DO NOT TAKE MY ART OR WRITING IT IS MINE >:[

Strawpage :3

I think that's all ^^ sorry it's so long (ToT) ×

KYYOOUKKAAAA ON MY LAPTOP BAAAAGGGG !!!!!!! WAHHH SHES SO CUTE, I LOVE HER SOO MUCCHHH <3

Gng she's my daughter, i need everyone to know that >:3