Your Phone Fought You Because It Knew Humanity Wasn’t Ready For This Masterpiece. It Sensed The Power.

carlos: i heard you were talking shit about me.

oscar: yeah did you wanna hear it again or did you get everything?

lando: oscar—

OMG OMG OMG THE NEW BEARNELLI FIC????????

ARE YOU CLINICALLY INSANE??? I CANT BELIEVE YOURE LETTING US READ SUCH A MASTERPIECE FOR FREE......THE FLIRTING?? THE TENSION???? THE OVERALL DUMBASS ENERGY?? ACTUAL PERFECTION!!!! THIS IS THE KIND OF FIC THAT RUINS YOU SPIRITUALLY, MENTALLY AND EMOTIONALLY BUT IN AN AESTHETIC WAY. OLLIE MY POOR EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED GREMLIN WHAT MAKES YOU THINK ANYTHING ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH KIMI IS PLATONIC 😭😭. I ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT OLLIE WOULD TOP BUT NOOOOO THE WAY YOU WROTE KIMI MADE ME FEEL DUMB AF FOR EVEN THINK8NG THAT CAUSE WOOOWWW MY MAN KIMI OUT HERE DOING THE MOST. THE WAY HE PRACTICALLY TORTURED OLLIE FOR WEEKS GAVE ME LIFEE LIKE YASSSSSSS TAKE REVENGE FROM THE DUMBASS WHO HAS BEEN IN DENIAL ABOUT HIS FEELINGS FOR YOU FOR YEAAARSSS BY FLIRTING WITH HIM TILL HE GOES INSANE. THIS FIC IS CANON TO ME, LIKE THIS SHIT IS CURRENTLY HAPPENING IS SOME ALTERNATE UNIVERSE AND WE'RE JUST UNLUCKY TO NOT BE BORN IN IT

YOU HAVE RUINED ME IN THE BEST WAY POSSIBLE. I WILL NEVER RECOVER FROM THIS. ITS LIKE YOUR WRITING STYLE WAS SPECIALLY CREATED FOR ME IN A LAB SOMEWHERE. I WOULD DEVOUR ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING YOU EVER WRITE EVEN IF IT IS JUST YOU DESCRIBING PAINT DRY FOR 100K WORDS. I WOULD EAT THAT SHIT UP LIKE STARVING WOMAN. I GENUINELY LOVE YOU

brb gonna write a 100k fic abt paint drying

but seriously, THANK YOU SO SO SO SO MUCH FOR READING BABYGIRL I AM LITERALLY SLKFJFGBLVFKSNLB THANK YOU!!!! I JUST. YEAH.

bribing with plot is a new low even for u babes. alsoooo blinking counts as napping, ryt?

just read abt anatidaephobia and now I have an irrational fear. and also a plot to a crackfic that I don't know what to do with.

it be like that sometimes.

I want my fic to be cited in someone's villain origin story. i want it to emotionally devastate a reader so badly they look out the window in the rain and whisper my AO3 username like it's a curse.

my dream as a fanfic writer is for one day, one of my fics to be someones comfort fic. like the fic that they reread when they don't feel good and want to be happy. i want my words to comfort someone one day

narrative structure i am begging you not to turn into a series of vaguely connected emotional breakdowns. narrative structure please help me form a cohesive storyline. narrative structure you were supposed to have THREE ACTS not seventeen feral gremlins fighting in a trench coat over tone and pacing.

Rosquez x The Internet

That was freaking amazing omg

I love you

I literally have no words

Heard that you need to study tho so I'll shut up

Cause girl same

But that really was amazing can't wait for the full piece to drop

Now you go study & I'll do the same

Thank you pookie for posting this and listening to my rambling

-🤖

ok ok ok byeeee LETS ALL LOCK INNN

I’m not procrastinating I’m simply choosing to engage in emotionally enriching suffering before I do the Thing™

hiii i love ur fics sm literally the only way im getting thru exam szn bro theyre sosososo good ty for ur works 🙇‍♀️ plsplsplspls return to the f1/pjo crossover PLEASE

I WILL I PROMISE I JUST NEED PLOT