Find The Fic Here

I did this little comic a few months ago but never posted it here. The story is from my hero academia ultra impact! Present Mic's day out history.

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As a cat owner who loves all cats I totally agree with this, please keep your cat inside for the sake of the environment and its own. And before someone does the comment, no indoor cats aren't destructive if you give them enough attention and playtime

as a huge lover of birds, 90% of the concern against wind turbines being used for energy is literally just pro fossil fuel propaganda. birds ARE at a risk however there is a lot of strategies even as simple as painting one of the blades that reduces a lot of accidental deaths. additionally renewable energy sources will do more in favor of the environment that would positively impact birds (and all of us). one study found over one million bird deaths from wind turbines. while that is a shockingly high number and we should work to drastically shrink it, at least 1.3 billion birds die to outdoor cats on a yearly basis. it was never about caring about birds

Thoughts about tsats, trauma, and the cocoa puffs

Nico’s personality in tsats feels most reminiscent of what he was like in The Titans Curse which (imo) is a sign that he is slowly healing and living with his trauma.

The Sun and the Star emphasizes that trauma and PTSD can make it feel like one’s past life events happened to a completely different person, and it mentions that Nico relates to this feeling. This distancing of oneself from past memories, experiences, and personality can result in feeling disconnected for a while, taking on new personality traits, feeling like a chameleon mimicking others, or just feeling empty.

For some people (maybe, depending on when trauma occurs), healing can be about reconnecting with our childhood selves. Depending on what someone was like before trauma, like maybe Nico for example, that can mean becoming more emotional, being more playful, indulging in your childhood interests (eg. mythomagic cards). And Nico’s progression practically mirrored mine exactly through the years, and the ways I changed in ED treatment.

It’s hard to let go of a disorder when in some cases it feels like the only thing that’s stayed stable in our lives. Suffering is touted as the pinnacle of art– we see its romanticization everywhere. It sounds weird to say that I miss being sick, or I miss my suffering, when I’m actively trying to make my life better, but those thoughts do come up. And when it comes to characters I project that misery on to? Well, if I’m suffering, then they have to suffer with me! (After all, they’re just characters, it’s not that deep, right?) Except I found that the more I made my characters suffer, and focused on the ‘beauty’ of suffering, the harder it was for me to heal from my own. Whenever my health was in decline, I characterized my favorite characters the same way. It was just as hard to allow those characters to heal as it was to allow myself to heal. (Other people might not feel the same, though.)

I think Nico choosing to accept the physical manifestations of his demons (while also setting them free, and allowing them to exist as they please) mirrors the suggestion I was given in treatment when I struggled with the idea of ‘giving up’ my eating disorder– because to me, it was always either defeat the disorder or be consumed by it, and defeating it sounded like killing a part of me or erasing a part of my past or my home. Approaching treatment from the standpoint of killing my eating disorder scared me too much. I knew my disorder had caused problems for me, but many of the habits and behaviors I’d developed had served as my coping mechanism and they helped me survive. 

So, my therapist told me: “You don’t have to shun your disorder, kill it, or say goodbye. Instead, you can acknowledge that it served a purpose during a point in your life in which you used it to survive, but you no longer need to hold on to it and that’s okay — you’re setting it free. Maybe even instead of saying goodbye, you can say ‘thank you, I’m alright now.’”

And that’s pretty much… exactly what Nico did with the demons. Bob, too, acknowledged that he was a titan, and that was part of his past, and that’s okay — but he’s allowed to change. And Nico is too.

I just found that really really wonderful because I related to it so heavily. He didn’t want to conquer his trauma in battle. He wanted it to just… be acknowledged, and set free. And it followed him, but he can have a better relationship with his past now. He’s not consumed by it. It’s just there, it’s a part of him, and he can continue to live his life. And I think reading this book (while trying to maintain and navigate post-treatment life) was exactly what I needed to remind myself why I’m doing this.

I feel very called out right now.

You can check out the rest on Popopretty's twitter

Not only this but also the fact that while we celebrate the representation made by this big monopoly corporations, the work made by the people they are supposed to represent still flops.

to be honest i feel like discussions about Representation need to come second to discussions about dissolving corporate media monopolies. i don’t care how diverse the characters in a show are if the system in place still demands that art has to be palatable for the masses and filtered thru a corporate assembly line just to exist. its crazy. its craaazy how far people will go to defend the honor of corporate media. i guarantee whatever Creatives are responsible for the representation in your favorite piece of corporate media could have made something better, realer, and more valuable if they didn’t have to sanitize their shit for the mass market. i guarantee there are a million people out there who would make stuff you would love but the fact that media is treated as a product and not an art form means theyll never get a chance to do anything at all. 

You can watch other examples of my art in the pinned publication.

I can also do your Matlab homework for $50.

Today is lung health day. Heads up: I have one lung. If you smoke around me, I'll get pissy. Yes, this includes weed. Yes, this includes vapes.

Please don't smoke near the entrances to buildings, in bus stops, or anywhere else people will get stuck breathing in your smoke. It can be physically damaging and it's really quite scary when you can't breathe, even for a few seconds.

Latin american films and shows i like

Los sustos oculos de Frankelda (2019) - 5 chapters (around 15 minutes each)

La casa lobo (2018) - 75 minutes

 Veneno para las hadas (1984) - 90 minutes

Hasta el viento tiene miedo (1968) - 90 minutes

Más negro que la noche (1975) - 96 minutes

divided between wanting to do tsats art or continuing my list of all the stuff i want to draw from toa.