Haylee-bb - IDKwhatimdoing/random Fuckery

I would fucking DIE if someone wrote this in my comment section, oh my GOD!

trying to think of what to write in an ao3 comment that isn't just "blew my cock and balls straight off"

“Many people seem to think it foolish, even superstitious, to believe that the world could still change for the better. And it is true that in winter it is sometimes so bitingly cold that one is tempted to say, ‘What do I care if there is a summer; its warmth is no help to me now.’ Yes, evil often seems to surpass good. But then, in spite of us, and without our permission, there comes at last an end to the bitter frosts. One morning the wind turns, and there is a thaw. And so I must still have hope.”

— Vincent Van Gogh

LITERALLY!!!

No one, not even Spike, thought what happened in Seeing Red was okay and all throughout season 7 we were reminded of that. Yet fucking Riley, douchebag extraordinaire, was still seen as 'in the right'??? I'm supposed to watch him whining about Buffy being emotionally unavailable WHILE HER MOM IS DYING and feel sympathy? I'm supposed to watch him project his insecurities onto her, blame her for his toxic masculinity ruining their relationship, and then listen to Xander gaslight her into thinking this was all somehow her fault, and feel something other than unbridled rage??? Fucking how???

I am increasingly grateful that Spike was so divisive in the writers' room. Both Angel and Riley were supposed to be heroes, but you have them doing things like:

Experiencing a moment of true happiness when nutting in a teenager, but not when cuddling with his own child

Cheating on Buffy and saying it's her fault

Like, knowing what we know about Whedon and the sort of toxic environment he nurtured, it's really no wonder that the dudes on staff thought these guys were sympathetic and couldn't understand why Spike was so popular when he was, you know, not doing stuff like that. Also his actual shitty behavior was called out as actually shitty by other characters and the narrative, whereas Angel and Riley (and Xander and others, lbr) were constantly devil's advocated by the same narrative, if not let off the hook entirely.

why could I see this happening in my au🤣

Klaus: Damnit, I cut my finger

Caroline: Want me to kiss it better?

Klaus: That works?

Caroline: Yeah, my mom used to do it when I was little

*later*, Klaus: I need you to punch me in the mouth

Kol: Fucking finally

Oof.

When I was a (unmedicated, undiagnosed ADHD) kid, like, under 12, my room was a mess all the time. Not shocking.

I struggled keeping it clean.

I struggled getting it clean.

I would sincerely put in quite a bit of effort and be really proud of the progress I made. Then one of my parents would come check and see how I was doing.

"Well, you've still got a long way to go."

That sentence. I was like, 11 when my parents were saying that to me. It was crushing. All my pride and satisfaction with my work was completely gone. All my effort was worthless to them. All they saw what everything I didn't do.

At the age of ELEVEN, I knew that wasn't right. That wasn't fair. I swore to myself I would never invalidate someone's work like that.

Now, at 30, I catch myself thinking 'I cleaned up, but my apartment is still so messy.' and I flashback to standing in my bedroom as a child, hearing those fucking words from my parents.

'No. I wouldn't invalidate someone else's work. I'm not going to invalidate my own. I did good. I made progress.' and I'll list the things that I DID get done to myself.

You deserve credit for all the progress you make.

You deserve credit for all the work you do.

It doesn't matter how much work you have left.

What you accomplish, no matter how small, counts. Even when what you accomplished was taking a day to rest and recharge and give yourself a break.

Never let anyone invalidate your work. Not even you.

Most recent finished work: Untitled birthday present for trucker.

Ignore the poor lighting and occasional wonky bits.

He pulls the thin strands of his hair up into a messy bun, feeling the sparse follicles crunch like corn husks in his grip.

He looks at himself in the mirror, his face pulled taut by the Hello Kitty scrunchie struggling to grip his almost non-existent locks, and his complexion a cheeto dust orange.

It was clear in that moment. He was not like other ex presidents.