Broke: Dick Has No Degrees And Dropped Out Young

Being trans and working in an office is funny sometimes

This is actually peak omg

the first ever ric grayson x roy harper fic <3 i'm a trendsetter.

readcomiconline.li dont show me singles in my area i dont care about sex i only care about batman

Things I think about late at night

-discowing was Dicks dads costume

-the mullet everyone cracks jokes about (same) was given to him my mirage

- the OG Robin costume was based on his parents and his circus costumes and now it’s black, gray and orange

- Jason Todd’s biggest fear is not living up to Dick Grayson (in Bruce’s eyes)

- Damian Wayne’s biggest fear is disappointing Dick Grayson

- DC tried to make Dick and Donna a thing (no..just no)

-Dick and Damian both have a compulsive need to pick up strays (is this Bruce’s fault or did they bond over this?)

- Tim Drake is so cool in the comics and I wasted so many years hating him cuz fanon Tim is a lil bitch boy

-Jason Todd is such a loser in canon but it works so well on him god damn

-I’m actually rlly annoyed that Steph is never a contender for nightwing I think she’d do rlly well tbh

- Steph’s backstory is way sadder than Tim’s we should absolutely talk about it more

-Lian Harper :(

-Tim is so funny when he’s just some dude who ADHD hyperfixationed his way into a “I got adopted by my favorite band” y/n self insert fic except the band was a collection of deeply unstable people who fight crime and also happens to have an IQ of 180

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This image

- the fact that Bruce and Dick/Damian/Tim have a deeply dysfunctional relationship and I need them in family therapy

- Cass isn’t actually Bruce’s favorite she’s just the one that should be.

- the fact that Jason Todd canonically likes Dick Grayson and doesn’t like Nightwing

- the fact that Donna and Stephanie Brown aren’t friends and have never had a run together in canon (they should be- give me mentor-mentee vibes fr ong)

- Damian wants to become a doctor like his grandfathers and his mom <3

-the fact that Dick missed a solid portion of Damian’s development if you consider both spryal and the Ric arc to have happened in the same timeline

- Dick stole Bruce,babs and Damian’s super

- Garth, Dick and Donna are a sliding scale of blue to black costumes (they come in a set!!!)

- the fact I don’t have enough Dick and Garth fanon and canon content

- Jason/ Red hood needs an iconic establishing story like Nightwing year 1. I feel like Dixons Grayson is so easy to reference as like the “standard Grayson” before you add all the other (imo better) stuff from other future runs and tbh I don’t think Jason has any (if you disagree gimmie some recs)

- the fab 5 are called that in canon

- Garth didn’t have any friends pre joining the OG titans

- nightwing is on every Pride cover every damn year and he hasn’t kissed Roy or Wally yet? Sir? Plz

- Wally lost his wife and children multiple times in canon

- young Roy was bitter and wanted to compete with Robin!Dick but adult Roy wants to punch Bruce in the face bc he realizes bby Grayson was so abnormal

I’m fighting off Demons (an unknown virus) so here are the Bats various home remedies/ how they behave when ill

Bruce: can’t stop won’t stop moving if I die I die ig? Illness is a mindset for himself. For his kids? Give him 3 hours he’s synthesizing a cure his babies will never be sick in his presence how dare you.

Dick: makes the most bomb lentil soup and also has about 90 million metric tons of ginger tea with lemon and honey. He saved a beekeeper early on as nightwing so he gets really high quality very nice ethically sourced honey that all the Batkids keep trying to steal. He does the R&R except he’s an acrobat so R&R is doing paperwork while on coms

Jason: Lazarus pit + a childhood running around in very unsanitary environments means he’s never sick. But when he is he always just assumes this is the end for him and he won’t wake up the next day bc he everything hurts. (He has literally been ill like 4 times in his life he doesn’t know what to do here) so he just kinda finds a corner to die in like your elderly pet and he wakes up fine after a few hours and he’s always surprised.

Cass: has never been sick will never be sick

Steph: Steph is on top of her shit, she has a whole ass gallon of soup delivered, pre portioned and frozen in microwave safe containers. She also has a drawer of various vitamins, cough drops and syrups. She doesn’t have time to lay around so she tries everything to get up and at em as quick as possible. Sadly due to this she ends up with like a really weak residual cough for a few weeks even if she got 99% better after 5 days

Tim: L+ ratio + no spleen + has to be put in a sterilized room for observation if he so much as coughs

Damian: steals Dicks lentil soup, Steph’s vitamin gummies and cuddles with his pets if he knows illness wont transmit to pets. Or if he’s feeling really bad he gets very cuddly with his brothers but only Dick and Jason because they both run very warm and he must steal the warm. But also he rlly only goes to Jason when he’s delirious and in pain because he just doesn’t want the teasing. Bruce he’s a sick Damian wrapped up in a bunch of blankets with his arms around dicks neck sleeping peacefully and gets violently Jealous.

Duke: goes to doctor, takes his meds, it’s the only thing he’s normal about. His parents taught him well he’s not gonna ignore that.

Random headcanon number 20207483927

-Dick doesn’t spy on his families teams

Because he doesn’t need too

They’ll either tell him what’s happening

Or their teammates will

He’s friends with 80% of them anyway

Jason Todd was honest to god on a team with Dicks Ex who still adores him and starfire /j

No but really Roy and Kori 100% have doxxed Jason’s entire life to Dick Grayson

A) bc I will ignore any canon where these 3 aren’t close

B) Kori has never had a filter ever

C) Dick absolutely has indoctrinated the fab 5 into mission reports and now they feel weird without a debrief

D) Roy would find giving Dick and ulcer over the stupid shit his brother does hilarious

E) Roy would find giving dick and ulcer over the stupid shit HE does so so so fulfilling (revenge)

Damian is on the Titans.

No matter what titans generation of titans it is they’re responding to Nightwings status report request, fully detailed in MLA format with a reference list following APA 7 guidelines

Dick does not have to worry about young justice despite the fact they are very much NOT snitches bc Tim absolutely calls Dick and Doxxes his entire life story to him once a week minimum

(See Tim telling Dick random shit in the comics causing him to lose his balance and fall a compilation Im sure exists)

Both Clark and Wally are on the justice league. Bruce’s every dangerous move is reported to Dick via Clark and all his stupid ones are reported to Dick via Wally.

No matter how weird Dick and Babs relationship (on again, besties, off again, not talking etc) is she’s absolutely telling him either via concise email or 7 hour long sip and bitch session every single thing that happens not for help but bc ughhh wtf is happening.

Now frustratingly the same is not reciprocated

Bc

“Donna or Garth would kill me” -Roy

“*graphic details of sexcapades to distract from question*”-Kori

“Nightwing is busy” -oracle (babs just leaves when asked as a civilian)

“I’m sorry it’s just so hard to not talk to him okay?? He’s so nice” -Jon during supersons

“He’s my friend too, I can tell him what I want” current jon

“Listen he barely talks to me as it is I’d rather he still come to me with issues and insecurities without worrying his father will hear it” -Clark

“If you think I’m saying shit to you, you’re in idiot, if anything was wrong and I told you you’d make it worse go fuck yourself” -Wally

(OG Bruce Wayne hater of titans. him and Roy do fight over this title at the titans new years. Wally thinks Roy lost his place bc he found a new bird to be mad at the bat over so his timeline should shrink. Roy thinks this is bullshit bc now he hates Bruce for reasons of bird^2)

Bruce: … Dick why don’t you go back to school? Is a volunteer position as a gymnastics teacher all you want in life

Dick who is getting his 3rd masters (this one’s in quantum physics bc he binged too many YouTube videos late at night and now has a hyper fixation) : hmm yeah I don’t know, I don’t think I sit well for tests

Well it’s less direct comic panel and more a lot of implicit stuff but I have a few saved and a few that I remember things vaguely happening

But Jason Todd canonically resents Nightwing for being the perfect son

And for following Bruce’s teachings which he deems frankly ineffective and useless.

As well as feeling that he will never be able to live up to Nightwings legacy

(Feat Jason’s hallucinations)

But Dick Grayson is another story

Because Nightwing is Batman’s pride and Joy. Proof the the concept of the child hero and one of the first second gen hero’s who got justice league level respect without taking over a mentors titles

Meanwhile

Dick Grayson is his brother

And sometimes these two come into conflict like in under the redhood

You can see in the image here that when bludhaven got destroyed

Initially Jason wasn’t happy, his face was shadowed and he was genuinely upset and then Bruce screamed Dicks name and Jason immediately remembers himself and returns to taunting Bruce

Jason’s relationship is bad with nightwing bc he sees nightwing as another hand in Batman’s crusade

Dick has been Jason’s hero since long before he put on the uniform

And here is where I struggled to find more images

But Jason Todd and Dick Grayson have a completely separate relationship

Despite dick and nightwing being the same guy it’s very obvious when Jason is talking to Dick his Big Brother and Nightwing Batman’s lil perfect solider

They can insult each other and joke around and be supportive with one another

And Dick Grayson will always have Jason Todd’s back if not the red hood

There was a panel in I think the Nightwing 2021 annual where Jason was accused of murder and Dick goes to talk to him and Jason immediately goes “I didn’t do it” and Dick replies I believe you “just like that?” “Just like that”

And of course there was the iconic Nightwing and Batman fight during Gotham war with my boy did so well in he should’ve won

Anyway Dick and Jason are friends and brothers

Nightwing and red hood despise each other

Thank u for coming to my ted talk

I love how severely Jason refuses to differentiate between Bruce and Batman while also refusing to acknowledge that Nightwing and Dick Grayson are the same dude

I think the only time I have ever called my brother akhi is as a joke.

However I will say I am a stereotype and habibi, hubi, albi, hayati all leave my mouth when I am talking to loved ones (familial, platonic and romantic) but

Damian can’t really use these because not only are they sugar sweet

My love, my heart, my life (translations)

But also because they’re usually used from older to younger in a family context it’s not an explicit thing but with sibling relationships it’s very rare for the younger sibling to use these terms even in formal situations.

However do I believe that Dick would absolutely call Damian random pet names bc he thinks it’s funny how Damian flushes- yeah absolutely

DAMIAN HOWEVER would use Arabic to say shit that you cannot get away with in English

And he’d be fucking visceral

“عقل يخرا، و طيز تفكِّر" your brain shits and your ass thinks

‘I wanna hang your mothers pussy on a laundry rack and let it rain dicks’ is one we as a society do not use enough ‘بدي إنشر كس إمك عحبل الغسيل و خلي الدنيا تشتّي إيورة’

Tell me he wouldn’t???

Also Talia would absolutely call Damian Ya Rouhi instead of like habibi

And yeah mama, would absolutely come before ibny

This is just a mini info dump from an Arab batfamily fan because I find Damian calling his siblings Akhi... adorable (for me as a native speaker watching a writer use Arab words) and, not painful, just... itchy, it URGES me to make a pptx with 300 slides and just? Talk about Arabic?

So... أخي, Akhi, Brother.

It's not incorrect. The word is used in the right place and delivers its intended meaning. Other Arab speakers might not find a problem with it. They'd feel odd like I did but will likely go "eh" and carry on. But I'm an Arabic enthusiast, so...

Like with every language with geographically widespread users, the Arabic tongue kind of- deviated from its roots. The language has naturally branched out into so many dialects I myself can't keep track of.

Arabs from different regions can understand each other. They use the same words but for different purposes and with different pronunciations.

The original root language that holds them all (Quranic Arabic) was simplified into an easier, standard version that is used for formal speeches and as a communication bridge (seeing that you can't, say, translate something to Arabic and say it's for all Arabs if you use a certain dialect. Because an Arabic dialect is an identity at this point, tell me somebody is Syrian, and I know them already)

Now, with the fun part.

See, no Arab calls any sibling of theirs Akhi, I myself would burst laughing if mine did.

Yakhoi يَخوي (nonstandard, everyday Arabic for o, brother) , maybe, if I'm calling a stranger from the streets or an offender I'm going to give a piece of my mind.

Or, hold your breaths, my brother is crying, and the lights are out and I NEED to use the tenderest, most loving, most adoring, most revering tone I could muster so he just knows he is loved and family. Y'know? This specific situation.

And other Arabs might just say, no, I use it when, I use it when, I don't use it, etc.

The point is, nobody will mention Akhi. Because it's a Standard Arabic word, a formal word, and a word used in translated texts and stories when a foreign character we don't consider part of us call their brother. It's weird, it's devoid of emotions, and it's like watching a robot trying to be emotional, but it's a translated text. That's what translated texts use, and it's fine.

It is fine, Standard Arabic has been used for stories so much that nobody questions its influence on a character's characterisation.

I'm not saying Standard Arabic shouldn't be used for story writing, quite the opposite, in fact. I'm just saying that if Arabic is used to represent an Arab, its usage should also consider an everyday Arab experience and manners.

Now to Damian.

Akhi is robotic. Damian's personality does allow him to fall under that category. If for his well refined manners and polite, formal speech.

But even the King wouldn't call his brother Akhi.

He'd call him by his name. For my community (and most, I'm sure) siblings are called by their names, and if we look up historic Quranic (Root) Arabic speakers, they, too, call their siblings by their name. Yes, even the Sultan.

If not by actual name, then either endearing or demeaning names.

Arabs LOVE endearing names, but they're dipped in a pool of honey I don't think Damian would like to dive in.

Talia, on the other hand, would most certainly call Damian Mama. Arab parents call their kids by their own titles. It's the ultimate expression of parental love of all times, in my opinion.

(Don't make Batman call him Papa, though. Pretty sure Damian would malfunction)

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Well, I said all that, but watching writers include Arabic words in his vocabulary is still sweet. Tt is not even a word, but it's such an Arab thing it's my favourite.

If only I could make subtitles of everyday Arab talk and show you, their speech is heavy with, excuse my English, word softeners, it's like they're talking in a TV drama and not the real world.

Watching Damian adopting it would be interesting :D

my bravest knighttt... come hither ..... mmmwah !! ok you are dismissed