Resolve ★ Kazuha
Resolve ★ Kazuha
— ★ Scry: Solar Scintilla + Kazuha — ★ Genre: Platonic + Fluff — ★ Concept: There are times when he wakes up crying and cold, but those are quick to dissipate after remembering that he's been blessed with fate's mercy. — ★ Words: 3.6k — First Part: Vigil — ★ Blood A/N: Although the scry didn't explicitly state to be in Vigil's universe- 'solar scintilla' is an invitation- I hope anon dear didn't mind eeeee— read the first part (original) for context!
“Nee-san, come look!”
“My, what’s this?”
Little Kazuha beams as he shows the contents of his paper, watching his older sibling try to make sense of his drawing, “It’s home!”
“It’s pretty—but I don’t see a house?” [Name] flips the parchment to look at its backside, but there is nothing.
“There’s no need for one,” he smiles, “Because us two makes a home!”
A samurai lives with honor and vigilance, striking down foes with a wayward strike of a blade.
Known weaknesses are to be overcome and be a root of power, and with each descent of a comrade in the battlefield equates to honoring their death and trudging on to triumph over the war.
This creed is held above all for those who wield the sword, and Kazuha is no different from it.
It becomes his reason the moment his hand burns with the transient blaze of his friend’s Vision—becoming his purpose as he flees from Tenshukaku.
He has rooted deep into his heart the reality that he will have to respect Tomoaki’s decision. Accepted that he will honor him by bearing the now masterless Vision in hopes that one day, something greater will trounce that vicious lightning.
That passing shall be his source of strength, he will proceed with his own war.
But he later realizes with grave denial that he is far from being prepared to live by the code of the samurai.
“You…” a broken whisper in the cold.
He is not ready to march on his battlefield alone. It is an inopportune time—a cruel hand of destiny, a devastating turn of events. He did not want this.
He doesn’t want to honor this.
“Have to leave me.. Kazu..” a tiny plea lost to his ears.
Underneath the eternal squall that plays a part in fate’s cruel thesis, the fugitive runs with only the wind and his resolve as his incentives.
The lasting echoes of numerous bellows make him run faster.
But the heavy rain lags him down. The stormfall minutes ago has at long last begun to pour its tears, crying for a tragedy that is minutes away from reaching fruition.
Not if he goes against it, though.
Another murmur resounds, more desperate than ever, “They will catch you..”
The burn in his chest, the ache in his limbs, the mist in his eyes—why is it that even his body is going against his will?
Why must even he fall victim to this tragic play?
“I’m only slowing you down.”
He can’t allow it—no, he won’t allow it.
The boat is close—he has managed to outrun the shogunate, there is no way he’s stopping now.
The arms around his neck start to unlink themselves, letting go after the realization that he will not bend to the wish to let go. Feeling the deliberate loss of security on his person, he begins to panic.
Stop it. He can’t pause midway to move his sister from his back into his arms, there’s no time. Stop it… !
Amid the cold, he feels warmth seeping into the fabric of his already soaked clothes.
It’s his kin’s blood.
And just being here, bare in the watching eyes of life, trying to rescue someone who—despite is knocking on death’s door—still thinks of him in her last moments, makes him rasp out a sob he’s been trying to keep at bay.
“[Name], please just let me save you,”
His voice gets muffled by the rain and the shouting, but he knows his sister can hear him well, what with the responsive twitch of her fingers.
I cannot let it end like this, he thinks after recalling how bright [Name] had been when talking about the future. You cannot pass like this.
Why is that when he has finally started to reach back for the fingers that have grasped his—they are withdrawing farther and farther from him? Is this the universe’s reprisal for his negligence?
For knowing only how to lament and regret when everything is already too late?
“Please..” he tightens the hook of his grip on his sibling’s legs.
I’m sorry, I’m sorry, just please—please don’t take her.
Though he doesn’t remember when his thoughts begin to overpour with his grief, nor does he know who listens to his prayers, he doesn’t care.
Don’t take my sister from me.
He cries, “I can’t lose you, too.”
“…”
The sound of the rain is all that there is, but he doesn’t let up.
In all honesty, he believes that his voice no longer reached his sibling—that he’s far little, too late, and the hope inside is dying- but then he feels quivering hands latch onto him again.
Weak, barely even noticeable—but he does notice, and he almost cries out in utter relief, but he knows the battle has not ended yet.
He does not stop moving even after he has gently set the lady in the boat and he moves to push it in the waters.
Does not let his aching muscles ease as he summons a burst of wind that helps propel them forward and guide them in the direction of Yashiori.
Everything is a blur to him afterward, though he does remember his tremors as he overlooked the paling form of his sister and her open wound.
He remembers arriving at the shore near Fort Fujitou, having barely escaped the arrows from passing the shogunate stationed at the borders of Kannazuka.
No matter how hard he tries to cling to his sense of reason, the mix of hysteria and panic is enough to conquer rationality.
It’s still raining when he takes his kin into his arms to race towards the resistance camp some distance away.
But he has overestimated his body—before he knows it, his legs have given up on him and he falls onto the sand.
The horror that gnaws at his conscious intensifies after seeing his sister’s body roll away, followed by a feeble yet sharp groan of pain.
Washing away towards the rolling tides near them is a dull hue of red, darkening to crimson.
An endless stream of blood.
But what captures his focus the most is not the stream, but the pair of [c]s and the hand that is reaching out.
The unpleasant telltale of disquietude tears out raw distress and he almost breaks back into tears seeing his dying kin reach for him.
With newfound resolve and clawed fingers against the sand, Kazuha pushes himself up—only to collapse, the strain on his body too much to overcome.
His vision begins to blacken and—no, no, no, no.
I can’t, not now.. ! Even moving his arms have gotten so difficult, but he keeps on struggling- keeps on fighting. I’m so close… someone..
He mirrors the action, hand reaching forward to the distant figure of his sister in a silent cry of desperation. Please-!
But his vision finally fades to black.
Nee-san… !
Kazuha gasps, resurfacing from the ghoulish clutch of the night’s terror with a lurch from his bed.
His hand is hanging in midair, reaching for nonexistence—at least, now that he’s awake, there is nothing he’s reaching for.
Still at the crest of consternation, the dropping of his arm is slow, like the turning cogs and gears in his mind that start to make sense of what’s happened.
Another—another awful nightmare. What’s the count again?
Oh, who is he kidding, he no longer is able to take count of it.
It’s always the same dreamscape whenever he escapes to his slumbers, the fear, the denial… he still feels them even after waking up.
A raw wound—an eternal scar.
He tries not to think much of it, knowing that there’s nothing to worry over now.
But all that greets him when he closes his eyes is the blood—the spear, the time of impalement, and he all but throws his covers away in mild annoyance.
There is no way he can sleep now. That is basically just inviting the nightmares again.
With unease nestling in his still racing heart, he makes the decision to leave his cabin as silently as possible—so as to not wake those who sleep in the same room.
The rest has had enough of waking him up when he’s stuck in those horrible terrors and couldn’t for the life of him open his eyes.
The timid rock of the Alcor as it continues its voyage in the sea thankfully gives him some peace of mind, though it can never replicate the comfort provided by the elder Kaedehara.
He ascends to the main deck where he sees Beidou behind the wheel, her good eye leading him to the starboard.
Sitting upon the barrels nearby is none other than his sibling, who seems to be stitching something under the light of the moon.
His chest immediately surges with relief. She’s alright.
Sometimes, all he really needs is the reminder that his resolve did not fail him—that his fear can be put to ease knowing that the [c]-eyed lady is still alive.
“Oh, Kazuha, you can’t sleep?”
He shakes his head at this, almost embarrassed, but the understanding smile on his sister’s face tells him that everything is fine.
She pats the space next to her in a wordless invitation and the samurai doesn’t hesitate at all, taking the chance to revel in the comforting solace.
The latter realizes that the fabric being worked on is the scarf, its golden trim being fixed.
“What has gotten you up?” her voice is as kind as ever, already on the precipice of giving succor if need be.
It has the kind of cadence that will urge one not to lie even if it’s for the sake of not worrying her.
Perhaps he didn’t notice that he has failed to respond as quickly as usual—or maybe it’s because his answer is already known before it can form into words, for a hand is already laying upon his wrist.
[Name]’s expression is blunt with understanding.
“Oh, Kazu,” her murmur is soft, almost lost in the evening wind, “It’s okay. I’m here.”
The way his taut limbs go lax at the gentle reminder he so desired to hear is almost pitying, but he can’t be bothered to care.
Closing his eyes, he takes in a sigh of relief, grateful for the wind’s gentle caress.
The comfortable atmosphere proceeds without any interruption, the ambiance only being the breeze’s encapsulating sound and the sloshing of the tides against the hulls.
“You need not be scared any longer,” he opens his eyes after hearing his sibling speak, turning his eyes towards her—though she’s still engrossed with fixing the scarf.
“Do you remember when you came back to Inazuma to fight alongside the Traveler?”
Ah… he hums, letting his memory reel in the scenes just a few weeks ago, “Of course.”
When he blacked out by Fort Fujitou after his dire escape from the city, the General has found and taken him to camp. [Name] has been personally treated by the Divine Priestess and.
Kazuha has never been so grateful in his entire life.
Just being able to recall the miracle—the shred of mercy, the saving light in his darkening world—is enough to drive him back to tears.
In a rather dismaying case, however, he still has to leave the camp. He’s a fugitive then, after all, and he couldn’t bear to endanger the Resistance.
He left with a promise to help overturn the tides when he returns with more allies and swears to grant them any favor, be it big or small, in exchange for keeping his sister safe.
[Name]’s comatose forbade them from saying goodbye.
It hurt—and his eyes still stung when he left, even still when he came across Beidou.
He recalls attempting to reawaken his friend’s Vision as a way to lift himself up from the cliff of his negativity, and thus he met the Traveler, whose journey requires them to head towards the land of eternity.
Kazuha wished to step down from the Alcor then but knew it to be a reckless move, so he kept himself patient.
How can he forget the moment his feet stepped onto the shoal of Nazuchi when the time has finally come to battle against the forces brought by Kujou?
And in the aftermath of the battle, when they have succeeded and will return to camp, he can’t ever lose the memory of his speeding heart.
When Kazuha looks at his sister now, he can only envision the second he sees the same silver hair standing out from the crowd weeks ago.
[Name] had been treating the wounded and had just finished passing the bandages when their eyes had met.
The world is a blur after that. Nothing else mattered other than the tight embrace shared between them amid tears.
If he dwells on that memory for a while longer, he swears he can feel the warmth from that hug.
“You know, I’ve always had my doubts about leaving Inazuma,” [Name] stops with her work, setting the materials aside as she lifts the newly stitched scarf with a smile.
Kazuha hums, not expecting the divulgence. This is new.
He never really knows how his wanderlust is perceived, so to say that he’s intrigued is more than correct.
The scarf is lowered back onto [Name]’s lap as she caresses its fabric, her smile turning more nostalgic and despondent.
“Because all my life, I’ve devoted my time to making sure that you’ll grow up in a place that you can really call home,” with a wistful tone, she continues.
“Sometimes I even thought of marrying into one of the renowned clans if it means helping to restore the Kaedehara’s honor and give you the luxury that we lost. Leaving means forgetting my purpose.”
He is a part of that purpose.
His first outward reaction to this is to flinch.
I.. wasn’t aware of such plans, he swallows thickly. All this time, you’ve been doing everything for me.
Perplexed, he turns to his sibling, grasping her by the arm and taking her by surprise.
“You needn’t do such things… !” he breathes out in concern, worried that this mindset carried over until the present, “I am beyond content even with the way things are now, you—”
He zips his lips and bites down on them. You needn’t sacrifice more of your happiness for my sake…
[Name] pats the hand on her arm in a gentle fashion, reassuring, “I know, that is why I joined you. I had a time of repose and epiphany when we reunited.”
She takes a few moments for herself, letting nothing but her [c] eyes speak of the hundred of words she cannot utter in a second. Still, it eases the samurai.
“What you said as I was treating your wounds struck me a lot… do you remember it?”
He does, with perfect clarity.
Kazuha had been drowning in the words and emotions he’s suppressed that when he spilled even a portion of it, the dam was breaking.
He refused the healing offered by the Divine Priestess to be treated by his sister, instead.
And when they’re alone—he finally spoke of it.
“In the first suns and moons following the fruition of my wanderlust, it’s been lonesome,” he remembers the words as if he said it yesterday.
“For although a haven has been provided by the Crux, I’ve come to realize that I am not entirely delighted in my travels.”
He remembers [Name]’s look of confusion—because why would he be not content when his wish was to travel all along?
He remembers the way her hands gently tremored at the notion of another departure, remembers the look of loneliness in those eyes- that he just falls silent again and allows his memory to reign free.
“’It ails me to know that I left home’,” [Name] chuckles, “That’s what you said before asking me to join you.”
“I apologize for my selfishness, but—will you join me?”
He purses his lips with a nod. Because I’ve learned that you are my sanctuary—and I can’t bear to leave again.
“I realized then that perhaps leaving wouldn’t be so bad, not when my little brother is there with me to make it worthwhile.”
Kazuha watches with slightly wide eyes as the black and red scarf is placed on his person, snuggling around his neck in a perfect fit, complementing his attire.
“After all,”
Because the last time he was given this same article of clothing, he rejected it. Oh, was that such a foolish move of his.
[Name] gives him an endearing smile.
The same one she gave him when she woke him from his nightmares, when she told him to come back safe in the night—when she only thought of his welfare as she pleaded to be left behind so that he can escape.
“Us two together makes a home.”
He is instantaneously swept over by a wave of nostalgia.
It has his fingers rising to clasp the scarf around his neck, wary that if he chooses to hug his sibling, it may hurt her.
Eyes glossing and heart weighing—because even after all those years, she still remembers that—, he shakes.
Nee-san…
Although he does not say anything, [Name] nods, welcoming his wishes with the slight opening of her arms.
Kazuha does not turn away from this, scooting closer and making himself comfortable in the loving embrace.
The fact that he’s no longer a child does not even faze him in the slightest—in fact, he wallows in his own grief within it.
How could he have ever turned a blind eye to his only sister when all that she’s done was for him alone?
He made mistakes at a heavy cost, nuanced changing behaviors that progressed arguments and yet—
A tear slips past his eye. And yet you still honor and accept me.
It’s this heart-wrenching realization that bolsters the samurai’s resolve to do right this time around. To cherish, to respect, to be grateful.
He swears upon himself, as he’s lulled to sleep by the brushes upon his hair, over and over again.
I will return all that you gave me.
“Anchors!”
The Alcor is beginning to dock and as usual, many are waiting by the pier for various reasons—perhaps a returning loved one, or foreign goods.
Regardless, everyone’s faces are full of mirth.
It is rather contagious, but Kazuha doesn’t need its influence to work up a smile of his own. His reason is already standing by him.
“So this is Liyue…” a murmur of awe and disbelief, “It’s beautiful… what will we do here?”
To ease his stiff neck and aching shoulders—to sleep on mere barrels whilst sitting was uncomfortable but worth it—he rolls them a few times, taking an ample amount of time to respond.
Not like it’s a bad thing, he actually doesn’t want to impede his sister from admiring the harbor.
“Aside from a few commissions I plan to take for earnings, I wish to show you all that I’ve explored in the meantime.”
This will be the first time he’ll take up commissions.
It’s a new feat but not something he’s not willing to do. If this is to be any other case in which he’ll travel alone, he will simply make things work even if he has to sleep outside and hunt.
But now that someone is traveling with him—someone who has allotted all her time for his sake and growth—he will turn to… proper means of living.
He’d hate to make this any harder than it is.
“I’ve heard of some festival in a few days’ time, as well,” he informs as they bid farewell and thanks to the crew, at long last stepping onto the harbor of a different nation.
It almost feels surreal to watch [Name] take a step—almost hesitant as if she’s still in disbelief—forward, turning her eyes to all possible directions in muted excitement. Seeing it is rather bittersweet.
He hasn’t seen her this happy—and he didn’t expect himself to feel just as jovial. Oh, what a wonderful feeling this is.
“I heard of glaze lilies and dandelions, oh, it’d be a sight to see them.”
Dandelions?
Kazuha hums at the familiar sound of the flora before nodding, “Ah, those are found in the city of wind. A neighboring nation.”
“Mm..”
He knows that distant look anywhere. It’s almost foreign. He hasn’t seen it in a long time but still knows what it means—perhaps, this is because they are siblings.
You’ve always kept silent about your own wishes because you’re prioritizing mine, he sighs. That won’t do now.
“We can visit if you so wish.”
The way those [c]s flash alight with a gleam so beautiful and liberated makes him stop breathing for a moment. Happy.
Nee-san… his voice is lost. For a second—it seems like they haven’t surfaced from great troubles and everything is fine.
“Truly?” [Name] smiles, radiant and blooming and alive.
Feeling his heart warm with gratitude—for the universe’s mercy—and ease, Kazuha allows himself to smile.
Oh, who is he kidding?
“Of course.”
As long as they are together, there will be no rainclouds.
“That’s lovely! Oooh, I’m rather excited—but wait, we must eat first! I overheard some people talking about a restaurant, let’s go!” [Name] claps before darting into the crowd.
Kazuha buzzes in shock, hurrying after her with a call of, “Nee-san!”
Just a reviving bond, a pleasant journey…
“I understand your eagerness, but please do not rush so suddenly,” the samurai sighs, much to [Name]’s giggles.
“My bad, but! It seems like we found what we’re looking for. Shall we?”
The older Kaedehara begins to amble through the sea of people again and Kazuha follows, his fingers pinching the ends of his sister’s sleeve.
... And a loving home.
a/n: at long last... the alternate ending.. A HAPPY ENDING! FOR KAZUHA AND NEE-SAN .·´¯`(>▂<)´¯`·.
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waiting on you
note: i think this still remains my longest work yet (seriously 2k words is the best i can do?), and perhaps my best
summary: draken doesn't mean to hurt you, but being part of a gang was bound to do collateral damage
warnings: slight spoilers, mentions of death, violence
word count: 2k
“I want to break up with you.”
You’re sitting in your bedroom with your boyfriend. You, cross-legged on the bed, fidgeting with your hands. Him, laying on his stomach on the floor, busy reading this new manga he bought. You didn’t bother asking him the name because at this point you’re too frustrated to care. Your heart is pounding in your ears and you think you just might throw up. It’s too hot and you wished you could just get up and away from here. From him. Because you don’t want to acknowledge your feelings right now. You know you’ll start crying if you do. You know you’ll start fighting. You know he’ll convince you to stay. And you know, deep down, you want to.
Ken doesn’t fully register what you said. He’s still immersed in the book in front of him as he pops a piece of watermelon in his mouth. He gives you his divided attention, though, as he hums in question. “Sorry, what did you say?” he asks, glancing at you once before returning to the book. You find yourself growing annoyed by the second. It had been so long since you’d seen him and he wasn’t even giving you the time of the day.
You throw a pillow at him, giving him a pointed look when he glares at you. The frown on your face is enough for him to get the message though, and he closes the book, one finger still in to mark the page he was on, before sitting up and facing you. He has his hair down today so you can’t see his tattoo. And you’re glad. You’d told him once that you loved it. You still did, really, but these days it just served as a bitter reminder of the place that was hell bent on tearing him apart from you. And he was just too stubborn to admit it.
“I want to break up with you.” You repeat, seemingly more assertive this time, though the lump in your throat says otherwise.
He does a double take then, eyes widening a little as he croaks out, “W-What?” The manga is thrown away, followed by him crawling over to the feet of the bed to get close to you, reaching out to hold your hands. It hurts you to pull them away, and you can see it hurts him even more by the way his face falls and shoulders slump. You want nothing more than to be held by him, to feel your small hands in his much bigger and warmer ones, but you know if he were to do so you’d never get the words you needed to say out. You look away from him, suddenly feeling the urge to cry.
Ken can’t tell if this is all a big joke, another one of those pranks you always team up with Mikey to play on him. “Baby.” He lets out a nervous chuckle. You still don’t look at him. You can’t. “You’re kidding, right? You don’t mean that.” He’s trying so hard to look into your eyes, movements so desperate that you can’t stop the first tear that falls. And he sees it. He’s just about to hold your cheek in his hand before you’re taking a deep breath and wiping the tear away. You look at him and you love him and you can’t help but hate him too. Why was he doing this to you? Why has he reduced you to this?
You shake your head at him, a silent sign that you had had enough. “I don’t think I can do this anymore, Ken. I can’t- I can’t handle you being in Toman any longer. I’ve told you countless times to leave that godforsaken place because it’s not safe for you.” He’s staring at you with this confused look on his face as if he doesn’t get it. And you think maybe he doesn’t. He doesn’t get why the gang is bad for him. He doesn’t get how much it affects you. He doesn’t get why you want him to leave. Which is why you will.
“Wait. Just wait a second, Y/N.” he stands up from his place on the floor, taking a few steps back from you as if he finds the whole situation ridiculous. “You’re breaking up with me because I won’t leave the gang? You can’t be-”
“I’m breaking up with you because I can’t keep waiting for you.” You stand up too, looking him square in the face, willing yourself to go on. “I don’t know where you are or what you’re doing on most days. You pop in and out as you wish and expect me to be okay with it. Even more so now that Toman’s gotten bigger. I miss you, Ken, but these days I can’t help but ask… do you even still love me?”
“That’s not fair, Y/N.” he says softly, knowing you won’t like it if he raises his voice now. “You know I love you. But you can’t make me choose. Toman’s my family, and you are too. Please don’t make me choose who I’d rather give up because I won’t be able to.” He still doesn’t think you’re serious. You can’t possibly be, right? He doesn’t remember ever being this scared. Not in the fight with Moebius or Valhalla. Not when Emma died. Not when Emma died.
“You don’t have to. I’ll choose for you. Because I can’t spend any more nights wondering if you’re okay, if you’re hurt, if you’re in a fight with another one of those stupid gangs, if you’re-” you choke out a sob, “if you’re alive.”
He looks at you incredulously. He doesn’t really want to believe his ears. Doesn’t want to believe the words coming out of your mouth. Doesn’t want to believe they’re coming out of your mouth. “You know that’s-”
You don’t let him continue though. You can’t let him speak. Not right now. Not till you get everything out. “Please, Ken. Don’t you get how much it kills me to know that any day now I might not get to see you ever again? When you-” you stop for a second to wipe away your tears, deciding to sit back down on the bed before your legs give out beneath you. In a much softer voice now, you continue. “When you were stabbed and Mikey called me, I- I really thought I’d lose you then. And I felt like I would die. I don’t want to live-”
“Please don’t say that.” He cries, interrupting you, and it’s only now that you notice the tears on his face. “I know I make you worry sometimes, but I can’t just-”
“Sometimes?” You scoff, looking up at him in exasperation. “Really, Ken?” You really want to hold him right now. Looking at him cry is making your heart ache painfully and you really just want to hold him right now. But you know you’d never forgive yourself if you do. It’s so easy to give in to him. But easy’s not what you need right now. “Please don’t make this any harder than it already is. I love you too much and I need you to understand that you aren’t good for me… I don’t think I’ll be able to say this to you ever again.”
“Stop it. Just stop.” You look up at him and he’s glaring at you through the tears. Why did you think he’d let you go so easily? “If you loved me, you wouldn’t be saying this to me. If you loved me, you wouldn’t be doing this. You’d know that I can’t imagine a life without you either. Whatever I do, I do to protect you and everyone else I care about.”
You want to laugh. You want to laugh at him. At yourself. At the world. At this conversation. You knew he’d do this. He’d guilt trip you into staying. He’d profess how much he loved and cared about you. But he was all talk and no action. Because you didn’t remember the last time you felt his love. Didn’t remember the last time you were doted on. If his love was getting into fights and risking getting killed, then maybe you were better off watching from the side lines. You didn’t want to be involved with him or that gang. He didn’t need you, he had everything he wanted in Toman. You were just this shiny, new object he took a liking to and had now grown tired of. He’d realised you were too much work and decided it wasn’t worth the effort. Why should you then spend so many sleepless nights because of him? Because he thought it was okay to live a criminal’s life? You chose to love him. But you could easily choose to stop doing so.
So you laugh. You laugh like whatever he said is the funniest thing you’ve ever heard in your life (maybe it is). You laugh like he’s the joke. And you ignore the way your heart squeezes. You ignore the way tears are streaming down your face. You ignore the way he looks like you’ve just shot him. You wanted to hurt him. Hurt him like he does you. And you did.
Ken doesn’t know what he’s done wrong. He doesn’t realise what he’s doing to you. He doesn’t understand why you’re laughing at him, making him feel like he’s the crazy one. He loves you. Why don’t you get that? But he doesn’t realise he’s not capable of loving you. Not really. Not when he’s too busy with the gang. Not when his life is on the line most days. Not when he can’t even find time to spend with you. Were you two even dating now? It was always Mikey or Takemichi or Mitsuya or Inui or someone else from that fucking gang before you. You were tired of it. You were tired of being the second choice. Of being the one he’d come to when he had nothing else to do.
“Why are you laughing?” he asked, trying to keep any emotion out of his voice.
“Leave.” Ken pretends he doesn’t hear you.
“Y/N, please. We can work this out. We can-” He knows now that you mean it, accepts that maybe he has fucked up. But he loves you. So he can fix this, right? He finally holds your hands and you instantly feel your resolve weakening. You look up at him, and maybe it’s the first time in a long while you feel his love. Or maybe that’s just his desperation. The desperation not to lose anyone else. “We can take a break, Y/N. Just to think about it. We don’t have to break up. We don’t have to. I know I’ve been neglecting you, but I promise I’ll do better.”
“I want you to leave.” You say it much firmer this time, leaving no room for argument. You want him to get it into that head of yours. Need him to.
He sighs, stepping back. He wants to scream at you. He really does. But he respects you too much. Maybe someday he’ll realise why you’re doing this. But till then he’d respect your decision. He’d stay away if that’s what you needed.
Ken really doesn’t want to go, but he stares at you for a second, then two, before bending down to pick up his stuff from the floor. He steps towards you and leans down to plant a kiss on your forehead, lips lingering longer than you want them to. “I’m sorry. I love you.” He breathes out, turning towards the door. He glances back at you on his way out. Waits a moment for you to look at him, to tell him it’s all a lie, that you want him to stay. But your eyes stay trained on the floor, tears keep spilling, heart keeps breaking.
Maybe you’ll change your mind. You will change your mind. Because he loves you.
feedback and constructive criticism is much appreciated!!
Can you do selectively mute s/o with Lisa, Eula, and Yae Miko plz n thnxs :]
Her with a Selectively Mute S/O
Characters: Lisa, Eula, Yae Miko x gn!reader
Warnings: none
A/n: Ah I forgot how fun it was to write for this prompt <3 ty for the request
Link to prt. 1 (not related, only if you want more)
• It became a game for Lisa to make you talk at first. She would ask you all different types of questions and even attempt to make you flustered with her charm. Eventually, it was less of a game and more of a weird relationship between you two.
• Lisa was definitely insensitive, she knew better but it was a source of entertainment for her to make others flustered or upset. But seeing as you were never phased she would give up, having you around was nice, however. You never spoke yet you made her feel comfortable.
• Lisa would invite you to the library often to mess with you, she was surprised as you’d show up every time without fail despite her antics. Even when she thought you weren’t listening to her you would show up with no complications.
You walked into the library to silently have lunch with Lisa like always, it had become some sort of unspoken ritual between you two. When she saw you her eyes lit up in excitement, only to squint as she smiled at you endearingly. Her pearly white smile drove you crazy, but you’d never verbally admit it. “You’ve made it today cutie, I thought from yesterday you didn’t hear me,” she spoke.
You walked up to her desk, waiting for her to pack her stuff up so you two could make your way to Good Hunter together. “Say how about you order your food today. I want to hear your voice love, I imagine it’s silky smooth, something I’d expect from a cutie pie like you,” she stood up from her wooden chair, tucking it back into the desk. Her hand on your chest, sliding lower to your abdomen as a flirtatious gesture.
“I’d prefer not to,” you replied without a second thought. You only spoke when you felt necessary, so far with Lisa it hadn’t been until pressured to communicate with others. “I only want to speak to you,” you added for context. Lisa’s hand dropped from your chest, her eyes widened and her head lowered, expressing a deep frown of amazement.
“Say that again,” she enticed you, she regained her composure rather quickly. You shook your head, her drawing her ear closer to your mouth so you could whisper something, anything in it. “No- say it again. I want to hear your voice one more time, that was unsolicited so I wasn’t ready to memorize it. This time I can remember it well.”
You didn’t let out a peep, of course, she was being too greedy. “Listen, now that I know you can talk, you’d better be ready. I’ll get it out of you again one day,” at her old age she knew to be patient to get what she wanted. This was one of those moments.
• Eula was at first frustrated that you wouldn’t talk. That frustration turned into infatuation. and the infatuation developed into protectiveness. She was your guardian angel, especially if anyone tried to make fun of you. She would even get jealous if anyone tried to talk to you.
• Eula liked how you didn’t have any sharp words to offer her upon realizing she was a Lawrence. She remembered revealing it, expecting backlash, but you just blinked at her unphased at the revelation. She would find it easy to let her guard down around you in a comfortable silence.
• Eula became your voice. If you were eating out? She’d order for you, she already knew all of your preferences based on your reactions. If you were asked a question? She’d answer for you, she was convinced she knew best for you because you never talked back.
Eula and you strayed through the alleyways of Mondstadt. It wasn’t until she met you that she truly felt like she belonged, even if you didn’t communicate how others did. It was okay, however, even though it felt as if she were talking to a stone wall 90% of the time, she wouldn’t have it any other way. “What do you want to eat today for lunch? I’m rather starved,” she asked you attentive to your needs.
You didn’t reply, just looking at your feet as they kicked around the cobblestone path. “Silent as always huh? How about Good Hunter? I could use some fisherman’s toast at the moment. Hm… but I’m not really craving it,” she was lost in thought. “You probably dislike how indecisive I am huh?” she asked you feeling incompetent.
“No, I don’t dislike it at all,” you replied in a monotone voice. She stopped in her tracks, you continued not noticing her falling behind you. Did you just speak? She thought. What an exotic experience, to listen to your voice. The more she thought about it the more her lust to hear it again grew inside of her.
“Please repeat what you had said for me,” she asked of you. She did a light jog to catch up to you, her heels clicking against the concrete. You continued to walk, ignoring her pleads. She tried stopping you, walking in front of you, linking to your arms, even pretending to trip to get your attention. “Please? For me?” she asked blinking abnormally fast like a child begging for a toy.
You looked at her nonchalantly, at this moment she realized her efforts were for naught. Of course, she never got what she wanted so easily. “Fine, I’ll do what it takes to listen to your voice again. I just have you know that the day I hear it is the day I’ll strike absolute vengeance upon you,” she folded her arms assertively with a pout. How mean.
• Yae Miko found it fascinating, she had never met such a silent human. She thought it was resourceful to keep you around, you’d follow her commands without hesitation and best of all there were no complaints. At first, she saw you as a tool, but eventually, she grew possessive over your loyalty.
• Miko at first found it awkward that she was the only one talking, thinking it was some facade. Eventually, she drew the conclusion that you were just mute. Whether it was diagnosed or by choice none of it mattered to her. She found it rather adorable, like a little doll.
• It all started when Miko gave you a chore to sweep the main lobby as a joke. Unbeknownst that you actually completed it regardless of her insisting it was fine. She would experiment on you from thereon. Even growing an irrational paranoia that you would one day slip from her fingers without a single word.
Miko nuzzled against your shoulder, breathing in the fresh air that was littered with the scent of sakura petals. You had just completed sweeping the prayer rooms for Miko and dusting all the shelves. “Ah what would I do without you? You’re so obedient,” she looked up at you with puppy dog eyes.
“I must know, however-,” Miko started to think sentimentally. Recently she had been thinking that you might leave her, a thought she was plagued with. “Would you ever leave me? I mean it’s only natural. I one day gave you an order and you complied, it has been like this since I’ve known you. If someone else barked orders at you, would you follow them too?”
“No- never,” you replied bluntly without hesitation. Her ears twitched, her eyes widened, and her head cocked at an angle in shock. Not at your response, but at your voice. The fact that you even had a voice? She just assumed you lacked vocal cords at some point. But she realized now that she made a mistake drawing that conclusion without any evidence or confirmation from you.
“You can speak?” she asked. her voice wasn’t laced with any pitch like normal, just a flat question of confusion. She eventually regained her composure after realizing she wasn’t going to get a reaction from you. She cleared her throat. “You’re really not going to speak again after revealing that to me? What will it take? I can pay you handsomely,” she tried to bargain.
“I see,” she put her hand to her chin in analysis. “Anyways whether you decide to talk again or not, I am glad to know you’re loyal to me only,” she smiled at your response. Today she had not only been able to hear your voice but was able to clear any intrusive thoughts from her recent overthinking.
Craving You
Osamu x pregnant!reader
No warnings just fluff
A/N: This is another short fluff because I also love Osamu!!! Ugh, what a king. Anyway, this is based off a real date I went on where I had no fucking clue how to open the onigiri and it was embarrassing. Please let me know what you think and if it makes sense ily.
“How could you?” Osamu’s wail startled you.
Atsumu raised an eyebrow at you. You and he were manning Onigiri Miya while Osamu had taken your car to get serviced. You were sitting at the counter supervising Atsumu, who hadn’t let you stand for more than five minutes. Both twins doting on you was nice, but you were sort of getting sick of being treated as a fragile pregnant woman. You were only five months in too so it wasn’t like you were gigantic and waddling around just yet.
Osamu burst in from the back and slammed the offending wrappers in front of you. You smiled sheepishly but cursed inwardly at yourself for not cleaning your car before you let him take it. The wrappers were from store bought onigiri you’d picked up from the market on your lunch break a couple of weeks ago.
Atsumu peered over his twin’s shoulder and asked, “What are you a clean freak now? Tch, yelling at your pregnant wife over a wrapper is low ‘Samu.”
Atsumu always took your side, and you smiled sweetly at him for it. He puffed out his chest a bit at your silent approval.
“It’s not about the wrappers! It’s about the contents! I can’t believe you went and bought premade onigiris from the store when you have a wonderful chef of a husband right here! I could’ve made you any onigiri you wanted that would be a million times better than this crap and you know that!” Osamu was trying to seem more mad than hurt but the genuine heartache at this action flowed through his cracking voice.
You sighed, “I’m sorry baby. It was just that I needed something fast on my lunchbreak a while ago and they just sounded so good. It’s your fault this baby is making me crave onigiri so much!”
You pointed an accusatory finger at him. He cracked a sweet smile at the mention of your little one having anything because of him. He still couldn’t believe the sweet life growing in your belly was going to be half him and half the best thing in his life. Well best thing in his life for now.
He looked down at the wrapper to remind himself why he was mad before biting back, “If it was really my baby it’d have much better taste than for this crap!”
Atsumu piped in, “Well if it’s not yours I hope it’s mine.”
Osamu whirled around and punched his twin hard in the shoulder for that.
You were pouting now once Osamu’s attention was back on you. You leaned forward to rub his forearms over the glass display case. He sighed at the contact, still huffy.
“I just still like these because they remind of when we first spoke.”
Oh no, you had him there. He was nothing if not a nostalgic fool. A goofy grin overtook his face as he cupped yours to bring you in for a deep kiss. The memory you were referring to playing in his mind, drowning out Atsumu’s gagging noises.
Osamu was in a bad mood. Atsumu would not stop following him to harp on him about his spiking. He hadn’t even had an off day, but of course nothing was good enough for an ass like ‘Tsumu. Osamu thought if he went into the local market he’d get some solace but that was never going to happen. As he walked towards the prepared grab n’ go section as Atsumu still bitched about his decoy work, ‘Samu was wishing he’d eaten his twin in the womb.
The only thing that got ‘Tsumu to shut up was seeing a pretty girl in said section. You were wearing an Inarizaki uniform and a cute pensive look on your face as you surveyed the selection of onigiri. You weren’t Japanese, but holy shit were you hot. How had neither of them never noticed you before?
You turned upon feeling eyes on you and waved at the recognizable Miya twins. You weren’t a huge volleyball follower but you couldn’t not know who they were at Inarizaki.
Osamu gulped and stepped towards you to look at the food. A blush adorned ‘Samu’s cheeks as you were so close your shoulders nearly brushed. You already had a salmon onigiri in your hand, his favorite and of course the last one. Atsumu hung back to watch the inevitable shit-show unfold. Atsumu hung back to watch the inevitable shit-show unfold. He didn’t think this was going to end well. Osamu was nice and polite but food brought out a nasty side to him. Atsumu planned to rescue you from his mean brother once this happened and then have you fall hopelessly in love with the better twin.
You noticed Osamu’s fixated gaze on the snack you were holding and held it up to him.
“Did you want this one? You can have it, I don’t even really know how to open them,” You laughed and shrugged trying to make a lighthearted joke out of your obvious foreignness.
Osamu smiled, “I can show you. It’s really not that hard once you get the hang of it.”
Atsumu sputtered, who was this guy? The Osamu he knew would’ve immediately snatched up the onigiri and walked away without a second thought or glance your way.
“Oh my god please do! It’s so complicated! Here let me pay for whatever you get in exchange for the lesson,” You were beaming at him now.
Osamu grabbed a random onigiri without taking his eyes off you. How could he ever look away from such a pretty sight?
Atsumu was left forgotten as you two went to checkout. He decided to just walk home alone and let his twin have his five seconds of fame with the pretty girl. ‘Tsumu would get your number another time.
You paid and Osamu walked you over to a bench outside the store.
You sat with your body turned towards him, yours knees brushing. The contact sent a shiver down Osamu’s spine. He held his onigiri in his lap as he demonstrated the way to unwrap it without ripping the seaweed. He tried not to show his obvious disgust at the fact that the flavor he’d picked up was seasoned kelp, his least favorite. You watched intently then slowly unwrapped yours the same way. Some of the salmon filling got on your fingers and you sighed thinking you did it wrong.
“It’s supposed to be messy, no biggie. As long as your seaweed is intact you’re good,” He reassured you.
You smiled again and just licked the filling off your fingers. Osamu felt something weird happen to his body as he watched you suck your pointer finger.
You held the onigiri out to him again, “Here take this one. I can tell you want the salmon one more than the kelp.”
He smiled sheepishly at being read so well, “Or we can just share. Here take a bite of mine and I’ll take a bite of yours.”
You nodded in agreement to the plan and you both took a bite at the same time of the other’s snack. Osamu swallowed his bite whole. He didn’t care to taste it because all that was going through his mind was biting into his own and having an indirect kiss with you.
Now Osamu had done much more than just indirect kissing with you, your baby bump evidence of that, and he couldn’t wait to spend the rest of his life doing it.
After he pulled away from your kiss he just mumbled, “You just don’t know what nasty preservatives they put in those things or who made them. I only want the best for you and our baby.”
“I know, I promise to only eat your food for the next four months ok?”
Instead of replying he just kissed you again.
“Speaking of, a world famous Miya seasoned kelp onigiri sounds divine right now,” You batted your eyelashes up at him to really butter him up.
Osamu scoffed and released you from his hold, “Disgusting.”
Yet he turned to go make said onigiri just how he knew you would like anyway. He had always made whatever you liked whenever you liked and he wasn’t ever going to stop.
He flipped Atsumu off as his twin mumbled simp at him.
(Y/n) Can’t Communicate! [Genshin Impact x mute!reader]
![(Y/n) Can’t Communicate! [Genshin Impact X Mute!reader]](https://64.media.tumblr.com/2a77e3e12581036f406d29c89afdcdc7/cdb08fbdda875762-2c/s500x750/1150fb83d9492dcae643bf6be6769e2016aec9af.jpg)
Synopsis: The quirks of a mute s/o can be both difficult and frustrating but nevertheless, cute!
(Komi-san can't communicate AU in Genshin world. How the boys deal with your social anxiety and inability to speak)
Genre: fluff
Characters: Mondstadt edition. Kaeya, Diluc, Venti, Albedo
================================
Diluc
Many know that the Mondstadt Tycoon is not fond of idle chit-chat, Diluc is a man of few words and his partner...someone with even fewer words.
At first, he found it unsettling the fact that every time the two were left alone he was met with pure silence. Then out of midair, you'll pull out a notebook asking how his day went. Though he does not mind the reading part, just the moments when it happened outside and everything was too dark to read. Luckily the Pyro Archon blessed him with the appropriate element for these situations. He's mindful not to burn them because one time he did.
You will never have to worry about forgetting your notebook because Diluc will be the one who will constantly remind you to the point it's almost annoying. But because he knows just how much of a frightful disposition you'll be in when your only ability to speak was taken away and he wouldn't want that. In fact, it also gives him anxiety. It pressures him to suddenly become a mind reader and learn how to handle your whirlwind of emotions which he is very very bad at. Ends up revealing a more awkward side of himself that he cringes every moment he thinks about it.
(You can tell he isn't a very good conversationalist either)
Just two shy people hanging out <3
Though this increases his protectiveness by a hundredfold. If you made a new friend, he would be the processor, the one to determine whether they'd be a right fit for you or simply those fiends that take advantage of others (Kaeya has a special class in this case, of course, he is considered omitted. Venti is high on his radar given how much he talks and how easily he can persuade you to do things). Jean once told him that you will never make any friends if he kept this up and when you agreed, he couldn't help sulking (don't blame him. He's trying his best to show 🥺affection🥺). Ensures that either his attendant, maid or Elzer would be the one accompanying you if you were to go to the city without him.
Yet Diluc is supportive in whatever you'll wish to pursue. He doesn't want to be the one holding you back in reaching your potential, instead of staying fearful for the rest of your life, he encourages you in subtle ways. His infinite patience to wait for those words to fall out of your mouth, even if it takes agonizingly long and giving praise despite it was only a few words. He tells you to take it one step at a time, you'll get there eventually and rely on him whenever you want.
For now the both of you just settle with writing letters. Although he has the choice to speak, Diluc grew fond of the traditional way of messaging and seeing the style of the way you write.
Kaeya
Unlike his brother, Kaeya has a way with words. He finds it amusing how you reply using a pen and pencil as well as the slight reactions on your face, you were like a puzzle that he enjoyed figuring out (eventually leading him to dive deeper in a relationship he was too late to get out from lmao classic Kaeya).
The pros of dating him was that 90% you didn't have to mutter anything and he already knows what you're thinking. You would just stare and he could tell that you were hungry. The same expression, it translates to "what did you do today Kaeya?". Not even the slightest change Kaeya can tell apart 'fearful' and 'cheerful'. A blink and a nod is enough for him to digest your...words. People question how was he so skilled with your silent language. That was because his brother was Diluc.
The downside is that it backfires. He can't stop himself from taking the opportunity to squeeze out a flustered expression from you every once in a while. No. That was an understatement. Too much to count. He's evil. Even though Kaeya knows exactly what you're trying to imply, he purposely mistakens it as something else more favourable to him. "Oh? Your eyes have been staring at me this whole time. Is this your invitation to kiss me?" And you'll frantically wave your arms to clearly reject that idea considering you two were in public but he'll simply interpret as a reaction of excitement >:) Then as you quickly search for your notebook you find it held needly between his two fingers, a smirk plastered wide on his face. He was having way too much fun (Diluc questions why you chose someone like him in the first place).
Jokes aside he finds you precious. You would be the type to wear your heart on your sleeve and it digs into his soft spot for he lacked tha aspect you possessed. Kaeya can read the mood pretty damn well, in gatherings he knows how to lead the conversation where you'll be comfortable in joining. Gives you headpats when you manage to say something, complimenting how cute your voice sounded. Will absolutely not let ANYONE get in the way of teasing you (only reserved for him heh) and if they do, they would definitely be met with the haunting gaze of the Cavalry Captain, sending a wave of coldair up their backs. Though the moment you turn around he was his usual happy self again.
Takes you to quieter places when the two of you have the time to go on the date and remembers all your favourite things to talk about, making it easier for you to engage. Kaeya won't force you to do anything you wouldn't like but he will always leave you an open door in which allows you to enter the time that you are ready.
"Sweetheart, why don't you try saying my name. Won't you? For me?"
"K-K-K-Ka-Ka....Kae............." "............................................."
Still a long way to go it seems.
Albedo
A disorder where you are unable to speak? Yes, very very intruiging. This was probably the main reason what brought you guys together in the first place.
Well its true that Albedo only has good intentions, sometimes his curiosity can get the bettern of him combined with his lack of perceptivity when it comes to social norms. He didn't know that staring at you for long hours (he claims it to be behaviour observation) would cause you to be so petrified. Sucrose told him it was called anxiety. Albedo couldn't quite understand. To make matters worse, he goes up to you and straightforwardly asks "You have an unsual way of reacting to your environment. May I study you?" and the only reply he would get is you running away from him.
It was a good learning experience. Albedo had to navigate through the complexity of the human emotion.
In a sense, BOTH of you were very bad communication. Your end being the one who can't say anything at all and Albedo saying all the wrong things so blatantly. He read in a book that telling jokes can get someone to laugh hence he tried it, several in fact, go through a large list to see which joke would be the best (Venti in the background be writhing in pain). Lisa sees him often in the library as he browsed through the social section, borrowing more books that related to 'Communication for beginners'. She even had some recommendations (mostly for him though).
However it does not remove the fact that Albedo is extremely keen. He has the eye to notice the tiniest of behvioural changes and commits them to memory. Like the way your breath hitches in different patterns depending on the occasion, reflecting your mental state. Or the way your eyes suddenly light up, indicating that you saw something pleasant. What angers you. What scares you. What makes you happy. Albedo made it a habit to write all those things down, hoping one day that he could draw a conclusion and help you get rid of your anxiety once and for all.
When he sees you stuck in a conversation where the other person obviously couldn't tell their boundaries, Albedo wouldn't hesitate to be direct. So direct that it would hurt the other person's feelings and make them feel ashamed of what they had done. He didn't intend it to be this way. That was just his nature. You admired how brave he voiced his thoughts and suddenly felt a rush of pride from the way you looked at him.
Has actually experimented on being mute for just a day, wondering what it felt like to be you. He thinks it can give him some insight on how to handle your emotions. Needless to say, being the genius he was, Albedo flawlessly handled conversations without having to do anything.
Venti
Loudmouth. Can't shut up. Osana Najimi 2.0
Venti is your polar opposite, always spitting out rhymes and ballads as if having empty space of nothing was against the rules. You sometimes found it hard to keep up with all the information you had to digest by the speed of his words. Often te case would be that he would already be on the next subject way before you could finish writing your sentence. (Conversations with Venti would only leave your wrist to have chronic pain so its better to listen instead).
With all said and done, Venti made it his mission to get you laughing. Just a little. It would really brighten his day! (Take notes Albedo). His first experiment would be playing a prank on an unfortunate soul but it would end up getting him a warning from the knights and a harsh lecture from Diluc (threatening that if he ever did that again he would be banned from the tavern for life except that one of them had enough time to outlast the other ehe). The second experiment was pathetic. It was Kaeya's idea. To get him so drunk and see him sing ballads in that state will get you to laugh. You were only worried about his health and brought him safely to your home so that didn't work. The third attempt he finds out that you're ticklish and it escalates from there.
"You have a pretty voice (Y/n), you should use it more!"
In truth, the bard knows how much value one's voice can bring as he himself uses his own to sing. Venti writes songs out of the words you wrote in your notebook and although they made no sense, it was rather sweet how he managed to put them together in a way that expressed your thoughts. Music is an expression of one's own feelings too, hence he taught you how to use the lyre. Occassionaly Venti would also grab a parchement and ink to follow your methods too, only for fun, smiling all the way. And to make things more interesting, he'll turn it into a drawing session where the two of you communicate only through pictures.
When you feel afraid of the world, as if the weight is dawning upon you, Venti knows exactly how to lighten up the mood. Its just part of who he is. Because of that you were eager to return the favor, to find your voice so that one day you can make him laugh too.
Dabi coming into ur room, annoyed that your not paying attention to him, and giving you shit playfully because you’re still in bed. You tell him that you’re not in the mood - your period came and the combination of fatigue and period cramps has you wanting to stay in bed the rest of the day.
You expect him to leave, but instead he’s climbing into bed with you, shimming down under the covers. Pushing him away, you say you’re not in the mood for sex, but he just shushes you and gently moves your hands away.
Suddenly you feel your shirt being pushed up, exposing your stomach, as very very warm lips kiss your tummy. You’re still suspicious but time passes and he doesn’t try anything more. Instead, he alternates between kissing every inch of exposed skin on ur belly, and laying his cheek against it - large hands holding your sides consistently, while your legs squeeze closer to his upper torso.
You push the doona down and over unruly black hair. Bright blue eyes lock with yours as you run your fingers through it, happily absorbing the warmth he provides. “Is the heat helping?” You nod, soft can’t even being to describe how you feel right now.
You spend the rest of the day like that. Cuddling in whatever position takes your fancy.
{ 7 }
when he sees you cry.
eren yeager x fem.reader
modern au | roommates trope
the drive back to your shared apartment was a bitter one as you were forced to relive your failures over and over again.
you figured the moment you got accepted into the university of your dreams that you were unstoppable; that each and every one of your goals could be obtained as long as you were willing to put in the hard work.
so when your bad grades and failed exams kept coming up regardless of the times you have spent doing your best to study for the material, you wanted nothing more than to cry. your heart ached, your voice was raw from the shouts of frustration that clawed at your throat, and you were just so tired from it all.
when your apartment complex came to view, you parked haphazardly on your usual corner, the tears blurring your vision in such a siginificant manner you were shocked that you were able to walk up the steps and recognize the door.
your hands were shaky, and the trembling of your fingertips made you miss the lock a few times. when you finally jammed your key into the damn lock and twist it open, you winced at how the loud impact of the door slamming against the brick wall reverberated throughout the apartment.
you hoped you didn't bother your roommate, actually praying that this would be the afternoon he slept in without questioning your teary eyes.
with movements that were nothing short of robotic, you lock your door and stiffly walk to your room. as you passed by eren's bedroom, you let out a string of silent curses when the door opens to reveal his disheveled form. dressed in only a pair of sweatpants, you could see the beauty of his godlike form while he ran a hand through his shoulder length hair. ah, so he was still sleeping, and you were stupid enough to wake him up with your commotion. "the hell are you slamming doors for? can't you see i-"
the biting words seemed to die from his lips the moment his emerald gaze meets with your bloodshot ones, still filled with tears. "'m sorry eren, i promise i'll be quiet."
"wait, who the fuck made you cry?!" you did not want to deal with this, already feeling a pounding headache forming against your temples as you continued your way toward the sanctuary of your bed. when you felt his large hand encircle around your wrist, you immediately ripped yourself away from him. "i said i'm FINE, don't touch me!"
knowing your roommate was a stubborn asshole who refuses to let things go, the moment you entered your room with every intention of slamming the door in his stupidly pretty face, eren stops you, placing his full weight against the door all while glaring down at you as he spits out your name, "i asked you who the fuck made you cry! i'll kick his ass if he does this again, so just tell me already so i don't have to see you like this!"
"and why the hell do you care?! why can't you just-"
you feel his hand on your lips, thumb stroking at them with a gentleness you didn't think the eren yeager was capable of. through your many months of living with him, you found him to be an immensely attractive young man; you thought of him as being devastatingly handsome, even. sometimes, you found it hard to look at eren without feeling your heart clenching at least once.
but in time, you got used to his presence. you hid your growing crush on him, buried it within the deep depths of your heart each time he brought a new girl home and lead him to his bed like it was second nature. while he kept those beautiful women warm at night, you forced yourself to focus on your own goals. you buried your entire heart and soul into achieving your dreams, and each time you fell short, you could never prevent the feeling of helplessness that came with it. which was why you desperately needed to fall apart on your own, without eren's powerful and prying eyes on you.
yet when you tried to pull yourself away from him, he pulls you back with a grunt, not relenting. you continue watching with wide eyes as a ferocity you have never seen before hardens his gaze, "we've been living together for 8 months now, you think i don't notice when you stop singing in the shower, or how you don't dance anymore whenever you're cooking dinner for us? come on angel, tell me who made you cry. who made you lose the light that i..."
he trails off for some reason, appearing frustrated in himself. in a vain attempt to save yourself, you wiped away the snot and tears with the sleeve of your sweater to give him a self deprecating laugh. "it's never over a boy. some guy would never make me cry this fucking hard, but my failures will."
when he finally hears the truth, eren softens his gaze and gently pulls you toward his chest. you struggle a bit, asking him what he was doing, yet he merely ignores you. with your bed in sight, eren falls back on it with you in his arms. "it's okay. i understand what you're going through, more than you'll ever know."
the warmth eren surrounded you with tears down your defenses as you bury your head within his naked chest, allowing yourself to cry in his arms as you cling to him, like a child seeking comfort with her favorite blanket.
"eren, i'm so afraid of failing...so afraid of not being good enough. and i keep, i k-keep falling short and i don't know how to fix it....!"
"sssh, it's okay. you've just been working yourself too hard, baby. you're not a failure at all, you're the most hardest working person i've ever met, angel." eren scratches your scalp then, running his fingers through your hair as he smooths out each strand, making you melt against him as you felt all of the tension disappear with his mere touch alone. "give yourself time to feel better, to do the things you enjoy so that brain of yours can get that serotonin and shit."
eren's oddly considerate words makes you snort as you wipe away the last bit of your tears, feeling as though a weight had been lifted off of your shoulders when you lift yourself off of him-
only to be stopped when his powerful arms wrap themselves around your back, effectively trapping you against his naked chest once more.
you could feel the heat pool against your cheeks, embarrassment flooding your system as you weakly struggled against him, "eren, i feel better now, you can let go."
"no, i refuse to leave my girl alone even when she's done crying."
you felt eren stiffen beneath you, stuttering out excuses, "i-i mean, we're roommates, a-and roommates have each other's b-backs a-and...uhm...!"
your smile widens now, and you were finally able to pull yourself away from eren's grip to look down at him, "oh, i'm your girl now?"
you take your time and admire the blush quickly spreading across eren's cheek as he quickly looks away from you. loving this surprisingly soft side to him, you gently made him face you as you nuzzled his nose with the tip of your own, "what about all the other girls who spent the night here with you?"
"that was before i ever got to know you. they don't come around anymore because i made 'em go away. you're the one i want, angel." you take the time and relish in the way his lips gave you a soft pout, immediately making you lean down to capture them in a sweet kiss as he returned your kiss with a fervor.
with a newfound determination and warmth filling you, you had a feeling you could take on the world, failures and all, so long as eren was by your side.
a.n. - i just wanted to say, i believe in soft and caring, himbo eren supremacy ｡ﾟ(TヮT)ﾟ｡
all stories are written by yeagererens; reposts, translations, and plagiarism are not allowed.
hi i saw you’re taking requests! i really love your diluc scenarios im so obsessed <3 can you please do a scenario where diluc caught the reader adding his surname to their name (does this make sense 😭 like y/n ragnvindr) i think it would be so cute and funny at the same time, feel free to ignore if you dont like this prompt!!
OHH MY GODDD, the way i squealed at this request, i loved this so very much! thank you so much for requesting! 💕
diluc ragnvindr x reader | 1k+ words
“will you and your husband be needing anything else?”
husband, the word stops your heart and your movements. the thought of diluc adorning such a title, as your husband, has been in your mind from the moment you knew he was your one and only, though the words have never been spoken out loud until now. it was certainly something you could get used to.
“this should be it, thank you.”
gripping the pen in your hand tighter, with a smile you can’t suppress even if you tried your hardest, you return to writing down the last of the items you were ordering for diluc, as he remains busy talking with another merchant, until the last thing needed on the parchment was a name for the order. your heart flutters and your whole chest blossoms with warmth as you write your name followed by a surname that didn’t yet belong to you. you stare at the letters and how perfectly his name looks with yours, someday would that really be your name?
and should you really have put that on an order for your yet to be husband? it was harmless, right? they were already putting it under the dawn wineries tab and diluc wouldn’t see it, no one but the merchant that already thought you were his spouse would and yourself. yes, totally harmless even if did make you incredibly giddy.
with the order placed and diluc still being preoccupied with another, you decide to have a look around the store. its filled with parts for machinery that look similar to what you’ve seen at the winery, jewelry, crystals, books and other odds and ends. they have quite the collection but with the odd list of items diluc needed it’s no wonder you’d come here even if it was all the way in qingce village.
behind all of the shelves and items you don’t notice when diluc finishes with his conversations and makes his way back to the counter until he’s already there and calls your name. the sound of his voice, the small smile on his face that he often wears when speaking to you, pulls you in like a moth to a flame and you make your way to his side, letting your fingers brush against his gloved ones when you stop next to him, the heat he radiates warming the tips of your fingers.
“ready to go?” you ask sweetly looking up at him, unable to not get lost in his ruby eyes when they stare at you so softly and lovingly. How you become so lucky to receive such love, you’ll never know but you’d always accept it for as long as diluc was willing to give it to you.
“almost, there were a few more items i think we’ll need. did you see anything -”
his words are cut off by the merchant that helped you before. “master diluc, here you are.”
“ah- yes,” he tears his attention away from you and reaches for the paper they’ve handed him “thank you.”
your arm is barely touching dilucs but even through such little contact you can feel his stiffen the moment both your eyes see the name listed on the order.
“does everything look okay with the new items i’ve listed?”
the merchant's question goes unanswered for quite a while and you swear in the silence the only noise in the whole store is the erratic beating of your heart as you watch dilucs porcelain skin burn red and brighter than the hair on his head, from his cheeks to the tips of his ears. he seems so shocked he can’t even find it in himself to try to cover his blushing cheeks like he normally would and your own cheeks aren’t any better.
should you just run away in embarrassment and hope he doesn’t question you about it later? oh good archons, what if he wasn’t okay with this - marriage hasn’t been a particularly big discussion you’ve had but what if he wasn’t ready and you’ve overstepped? the longer he stays silent, his ember eyes glued to the paper in his hands the worse your anxieties grow.
it’s your brain talking over your heart that's making you worried and it is all for not. there’s no doubt of dilucs love and devotion in your heart or his own and even though he’s not saying anything at this moment, the beating heart in his chest is screaming how much he loved to see this, even if it did surprise him so. he hadn’t excepted it and archons does it send him through a whirlwind of emotions he’s having a hard time compressing until he could express them to you privately.
he’s known for a long time that he wanted you to be his forever, that one day he would ask you that very important question and he’s beyond grateful for the patience you’ve shown him until this point. even if it took him a while to open up, his heart has always belonged to you, everything that was diluc ragnvindr was yours and seeing his surname written next to yours like it belonged to you only makes him think he’s been a bit foolish for waiting as long as he has. the ring in his nightstand that’s been waiting to be placed on your finger is calling loudly for him, even in liyue he can hear it.
the air around you is almost uncomfortably hot, both of your blushes heating the entire store and the quietness only adds onto it all. you needed to break the tension before you both combust but the moment you go to speak his name and ask him if he’s alright he clears his throat and finally answers the merchant, his voice as it normally is even though his cheeks are still tinted a lovely shade of red and his lips are tugged into an usually unseen smile. his free hand finds yours, long fingers slipping between the spaces of your own and squeezing tenderly.
“ahem.. yes, everything seems to be in order.”
genshin impact masterlist | main masterlist
SAYING SOMETHING OUT LOUD. multi
it's been on my mind quite a while. ( or, genshin characters + accidental confessions when they think you don't hear them.)
ft. diluc, kaeya, albedo, childe, xiao, kazuha x genderneutral reader
warnings : fluff, slight angst, blushy blushy, me bullying kazuha but its affectionate !1! i wrote this at 2 am editing tomorrow :]
DILUC RAGNVINDR. noctua
"i want to marry you someday." are the words he mutters when all he can do is stare at you, when he thinks you aren't looking. where diluc ragnvindr's entire mind goes blank — not a thought behind those pretty, red eyes besides 'oh god oh fuck' when you eventually catch him. diluc doesn't want you to know about all the ugly sides of him, about how rough he is around the edges. he doesn't want you to get caught up with him—he can't let the fire burn you like it has burnt everything else in his life.
he coughs, and refuses to acknowledge it ever happened despite your countless jabs to get him to say something—to say anything. it's quiet and diluc wants so badly to pretend it never happened, to pretend he never said anything because he doesn't want to ruin it—to lose you too. you huff slightly in frustration, and diluc resists the urge to laugh despite the situation he's put himself in. it's strange how you can make him smile even when it feels his mind is crumbling.
the silence settles and diluc can feel the anxiety ripple through his body as he steals a glance in your direction. just as he can get ready to apologize, your finger pulls his hand into yours. "we don't—we don't need to get married now, but in the future ... will you marry me?"
KAEYA ALBERICH. pavo ocellus
"i don't know if i love you yet, but if this isn't love then i don't know what is." are the words he whispers into your hair, on nights where he thinks you're asleep. where kaeya alberich is at the breaking point, teetering on the line between loving you and keeping you out.
on nights where all he wants is to say i love you without the fear of you understanding. the fear of you loving him because how can you love someone you don't really know? how can you love him if even he doesn't know who he is? you're a breath of relief to him and kaeya wants nothing more than to be able to breathe without guilt. his fingers rake through your hair, and kaeya knows—he knows he doesn't deserve to have you in his arms like this, but he can't help but be selfish when it comes to you.
you turn your head, your face only inches away from his, before kissing the tip of his nose and holding him tighter. it's there that kaeya finally let's himself close his eyes. there's so much you want to say, but for now, it'll have to wait till morning, when he can be completely sure you know what you're saying when you say you love him.
ALBEDO. princeps cretaceous
"you're my muse." are the words he replies with, nonchalantly when you ask why you have to sit still, instead of working like jean had told you to. on the days where he finds himself unconsciously writing your name in his notes, sketching your face in the margins. albedo doesn't even realize he's said it, he doesn't realize how the words affect you until he looks up from his sketch book to find you staring at him in surprise.
albedo doesn't understand love, he hasn't even fully grasped the idea of it, but it's obvious to everyone with the subtle reminders to take care of yourself because albedo doesn't know how to express his feelings any other way. "is something wrong?" he asks, concern laced into his tone before you shake your head, a smile growing on your face. "muse? did you mean that?" and his mind blanks, before the realization hits him.
"ah i didn't—well, i did mean that, but it doesn't need to mean anything if you don't want it to." he says in a panic, even if it's not obvious to most. his voice trails off before he finally exhales. you laugh, crouching infront of his sitting figure before pushing the bangs out of his face. his gaze remains focused on you the entire time, an eyebrow raised. his eyes widen, before muttering a quick "oh." against your lips. albedo doesn't understand love, but he thinks he can try if it's for you.
CHILDE. monoceros caeli
"i don't care about the fatui—about work, about my reputation, just—tell me to stay, tell me to come home and ill come home as long as it's you." are the words he whispers the night before he has to leave, again. childe knows he has to—it's his job, his responsibility as a harbinger, but when he sees his family, when he sees you, he can't help but feel like throwing it all away.
on nights where he can't let you go, his siblings having to physically pry him off to eat breakfast, on nights where he thinks if he doesn't hold you now he won't remember what your hugs feel like. childe doesn't cry—he doesn't want to cry in front of you, in front of his siblings because he's supposed to be strong, but he can't stop it when you make him weak.
he buries his face into your neck, promising to give you anything, despite him being the only thing you want. childe interlocks your pinkies, he promises a future. one where he won't have to worry about not being there to kiss you goodnight, but for now, you can only whisper your declarations of love till the brink of dawn. "i promise, ill be here when you come back, ajax."
XIAO. alatus nemeseos
"till the day i die—im not going anywhere, not without you." in response to a question you'd asked him earlier that day, one he was too afraid to answer. "are you leaving?" you asked, rubbing the tiredness from you eyes, strands of hair sticking out as you watch him from the bed. he knows—xiao knows that's not what you meant, not in that context, but the question struck enough fear in his heart that he had left without warning.
you lie asleep on his shoulder and xiao wonders if he ever really will leave. if one day the guilt that scratches at his throat whenever he says your name will be the last sign needed to push you away, for your own good. the sun is warm on your skin, and xiao hopes that somewhere in the depths of your mind, you'll hear the words he's too scared to say while you're awake.
xiao doesn't make promises, because he knows that there's always a possibility he wouldn't be able to keep them, but as the sun falls on your figure, xiao can't help himself. he never can when it comes to you. "you've stayed ... you've stayed this long, no going back, okay?" he sighs, and xiao can only hope you'll let him stay with you as long as he can. you hand finds it's way into his, interlocking them as you absentmindedly trace shapes into his knuckles. "no going back." you mumble into his shoulder before going back to sleep, and xiao freezes in shock, before slowly holding your hand tighter, tapping 3 times on the back of your hand. a silent 'i love you.'
KAEDEHARA KAZUHA. acer palmatum
"you're everything. everything compared to whatever this world has to offer." are the words he says when you ask how his travels went. kazuha has never been able to stay in one spot for too long, be it because of the price on his head but because he's always been homesick for places he's never known, for places he's never been to. he's traveled so much, yet he's never been truly at home anywhere, because every time he says he's homesick, he really just misses you. kazuha would bring you with him if he could, because atleast that way he'd always be home with you.
kazuha plants kisses into your shoulder, trapping you in his arms the second he gets home. early in the morning when you've barely gotten ready for the day, adrenaline coursing through him because he's finally home in your arms. kazuha talks about the places he's been, wishing he'd brought a kamera so he could show you everything he saw, everything that reminded him of you while he was away. he talks about the people he met—stories that sound so bizarre you have to poke his cheek and ask if he's exaggerating.
"huh, they really .. don't come close to being here with you." kazuha chuckles. he talks like he's in a daze when he looks at you, and it's probably because he is. "you're everything. everything compared to whatever this world has to offer" he whispers, before laughing in an attempt to distract you from the blush on his cheeks and the things he just said. "wait what did you say? i couldn't hear you." you ask incredulously, while he only smiles, planting soft kisses on your neck. "nothing, nothing."
you roll yours eyes, fighting the smile tugging at your lips. "for the record, you're my everything too."
© scaramew — do not repost, translate, copy, etc.
THE GENSHIN MEN + THE WAY THEY KISS
feat. arataki itto, kamisato ayato, xiao, zhongli
warnings. kissing!!! i love itto so much
ITTO’s kisses are messy. it’s your face in his hands and scattered lips along your jaw—all laughter pricking your skin and smiles stretching against your mouth. he mumbles words—messy strings of syllables and scattered i love you’s slipping from his throat, and you’re sure if you’re ever to find something akin to rapture—if heaven could form between the heat of your cheeks and the palms of his hands—this would be the point of discovery.
AYATO’s kisses are quiet. it’s sneaking into your room through streaks of moonlight and the stretch of silhouettes along silken sheets. it’s heavy words being carried through light whispers and the shadow of lips against your own—a touch meant for nothing more than to swallow you whole. if love was crafted through an action—if there was a way to hold the creation of things between your teeth, this would be it—he would be it.
XIAO’s kisses are nothing if not nervous. it’s treating your skin like porcelain—like a shift too fast or a grip too strong could shatter you beneath his fingertips. it’s the shared shakiness of breath and the blushing of cheeks and the stretch of the newborn sun across the sky. it’s hesitant i love you’s—as if every syllable is as much a weapon as it is a declaration; as if tonight could very well be as much a goodbye as it is a hello.
ZHONGLI’s kisses carry a whisper of promise. it’s ancient memory breathed across your lips—a wisdom of the sky above your head and the ground beneath your feet and the power in your bones spilling across your skin. it’s the knowing that i love you means forever, that if this is ever to end, memory will hold you in its palms and your words will never leave his mind, just as your voice echos from your throat.
reblogs/interaction is always appreciated
Gimme all your rodytodobakudeku thoughts, yo. I'm here for the poly love.
@allyru Thank you so much for asking!!
Alrighty, buckle in my friends. This might get long. I've got a lot of feelings for these four. Lol.
💜 PART 1/2 💜
Bakugou:
Is at first super jealous and annoyed.
He's already gotta deal with Icy Hot.
Why this Blade-Haired Hobo Extra now as well???
It's not like he's attractive. (He totally finds him attractive. That's why he's so mad.)
Also, he's witty as fuck so he can't just talk over the dude like he does everyone else.
He hates that.
Also the kid never seems fazed when Bakugou is Bakugou.
Just shrugs and grins and says nothing. Sometimes whistles innocently. Yeah, stuff he knows is gonna annoy Bakugou.
It totally does.
Is shocked when Izuku admits to all three of them one day that he wants to date all three of them.
They all agree to dating Izuku but it's a rivalry between the three of who can be best boyfriend until all four of them start dating each other.
Who am I kidding? It's still a rivalry with these three much to Deku's chagrin.
Bakugou finds Pino very cute but hell will freeze over before he tells anyone. He calls the little soul bird "that damn feather duster" (affectionate).
Todoroki:
Is constantly taking Rody's sarcasm as serious.
Rody finds this hilarious.
Starts doing that thing that people do with little kids making them say bad words or random ridiculousness.
Izuku gets upset with Rody for this even if he is a little amused.
Bakugou is hella amused but isn't going to give Rody the pleasure of knowing that.
Once they become friends and then start dating tries to help Shouto learn the difference between face-value information, sarcasm, and joking, etc.
Still does the make him say stuff sometimes because it's fun and Shouto is a good sport.
Shouto finds Pino very sweet and often she sits on his shoulders and sleeps.
Is the one all three come to even quiet time is needed. No words need to be said either.
They each have their own tells when they need quiet Shouto time.
With Bakugou he just angrily throws himself onto the couch and glares until Shouto silently pats his lap at which time Bakugou lays his head in it and Shouto runs his fingers through Bakugou's hair. - "Only because you're taking up half the couch." "I know."
With Izuku he will just walk up to him then second guess himself and start walking off until Shouto stops him and takes his hand, lacing their fingers together. - "Let's take a walk around campus for awhile?" "... thank you~"
With Rody its a little harder what with the way his witicism and sarcasm kinda hide what he's really feeling but you know who can help with that... that's right! Pino! And boy does she! When Rody needs quiet time with Shouto she'll literally attempt to turn Shouto's head to look at Rody. He still doesn't really 'see' what she wants him to see. He's not really good with subtlety guys, give the boy a break. But he'll come to realize that when Pino is trying to get his attention where it comes to Rody, something's gotta be done and soon. Especially once they are dating. (Shouto is the best damn boyfriend no matter his partner(s) and you can fight me on this.) *after Pino has gotten his attention* "Hey, Rody?" "Hm?" "Want to get out of here? My sister invited me to dinner if you want to join me? I'm sure she'd love to see you again." "... yeah okay. Sounds good." *Rody tries to shrug it off but I've look at Pino let's Shouto know he done good. Sometimes she'll even give him a thumbs up.*
There you go!!! Here's Part 1 of 2!! Hope you all enjoy!!
:D Also tagging @lynlys, @beyblader04, and id tag the anon too if I could who sent an ask for some as well! (Part 2 will be on @lynlys's ask!)
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my reading dump for genshin, bnha and other works (sfw only). feel free to give me recs
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