Wade: This Wolverine Is From A Different Universe

logan, sensibly dressed to go grocery shopping: what the fuck are you wearing

wade, wearing an ensemble that would evoke the fashion police instantly: it's incomplete without the red boa, i know

also logan at anyone who mutters a single rude remark about wade's outfit, claws out: the fuck did you just say

idc if hugh's wolverine is 500 lbs, wade wilson can easily pick this man up and logan will be stunned into silence (and horny confusion?)

ask for a male actor who has an insane acting range, has done a production of les mis, and was cast in a 2024 blockbuster film and i will give you hugh jackman and jonathan bailey

wade buys logan a secluded cabin in the woods as a getaway from the city and space for his primal instincts to be unbridled (and is an annoying prick on the way, dropping ominous hints that sound suspiciously like he's plotting a murder... which isn't entirely out of the question for him but logan's very grumpy until they arrive, in which he sobs because no one has ever cared that much about him in like a century)

my roman empires

my two favorite morally grey former lab rat nazi hating misunderstood metal powered old men are going to be in the same film if anyone cares

"oh so you ship poolverine because two characters who believed they were too damaged to be good for anything came together and saved each other-"

yes now stop talking

my problem is that thunderbolts* feels like a slap in the face to brave new world, okay? like, the mental health representation and found family dynamics are gold, but going against everything sam AND steve stood for (and risked their lives for, especially for bucky) feels so anti-bnw -- maybe even anti-captain america?

tbh if i saw my ex lying on the ground in a lilac sweater with the most luscious brown locks begging me to remember the time he helped me understand that there is good within my rageful soul i would probably give up advocating for human genocide and make out with him

idk what erik was on

from logan's pov he was drowning in liquor and self-loathing for decades before being kidnapped by a yappy red katana wielding fucker and informed that he was the worst version of himself in the multiverse, followed by a series of violently homoerotic events that left him a world-saving hero with a pseudo daughter and living in what is the first safe (and domestic) environment that he can call home in like a century with said yappy fucker who called him the best version of himself with full sincerity

wade: and kids, that's how i met your father