Abyss Prince Kaeya My Beloved

Question: Who wants a stupid AU idea?

Answer: Presumably you, since you're on my blog and that's about the only thing I write.

This AU contains references to sexual activity and not-quite-cannibalism, as well as attempted child murder (Obi-Wan's canon early padawanship)

So you know all those "Stewjoni are valued as sex slaves because they're dual sex and possibly mild empaths" AUs?

I want "Stewjoni are carnivorous species who are very attractive human-seeming individuals, but specifically as a hunting mechanism to draw in and trick prey, like mimic spiders."

(Someone on discord said 'like succubi?' and no. Nope. Succubi fuck to death. They gain energy from the act of sex. Stewjoni just fucking eat people.)

(Well, not anymore. It's impolite.)

(They have animal alternatives now.)

Obi-Wan is a very, very attractive man and all those things about his genitalia and sexual proficiency are true! But try to enslave a Stewjoni at your own peril, they're more disarming then a Zeltron and, unlike the Zeltron, their first instinct will be to eat you.

Does he eat people? Well, not usually! There are some close calls on Bandomeer and Melida/Daan, but he's not old enough to really be at full sexy yet, and "cute enough that nobody will hurt me because I'm baby" doesn't work on Xanatos (because darksider) or the Melida/Daan adults (because they're already killing so many kids).

He comes very, very close on Rattatak.

I want to say he rips someone's throat out with his teeth while undercover as Hardeen and Dooku is just very ?????????? about it. He thought this was undercover Kenobi but now he's not so sure because Kenobi would never be so uncivilized, right?

(It does put a different spin on him threatening to eat that shark dude.)

Anakin: You don't know what it's like to struggle with the Dark, Obi-Wan! Obi-Wan: Every time I have sex my hindbrain is whispering to me that I should eat my partner. It's not the same thing, but I can relate on it a bit.

Obi-Wan: My natural prey is humans. Anakin: ...what. [some time later] Ahsoka: I'm a carnivore! Obi-Wan: Ah, you're in good company. Ahsoka: ...? Anakin: He eats people. Obi-Wan: I MOST CERTAINLY DO NOT.

Obi-Wan: I am naturally inclined to eat people but I have never in my life done so on account of having been taught the innate value of life, and particularly that of a sapient beings, since toddlerhood. Anakin: I remember you ripping a man's face open with your teeth and eating the flesh you tore off as a power play when I was fifteen. Obi-Wan: I WAS IN HANDCUFFS AND HE WAS TRYING TO KILL YOU.

(Anakin 100% did not know that Obi-Wan wasn't human when Obi-Wan bit the dude's face off.)

Gelpenss: Obi-Wan very much wants to eat humanoids and unfortunately they ping his brain BEFORE the alternatives. He has NO innate dissuasion at the thought of eating human.

Atagotiak: Like, Anakin had realized Obi-Wan is more carnivorous than the baseline human, but... this is new. Anakin: Why didn't you tell me before? Obi-Wan: You were tiny! And Anxious! I didn't want you to think I might eat you!

I have no idea if Obi-Wan managed to distract Maul with the sexy. I assume he tried but did not succeed, just because that would be too much power, but it would be very funny if he did. Probably failed, though, and Qui-Gon's still dead. 😔

Qui-Gon insisted on Obi-Wan doing lots of meditation on the innate value of life throughout the entire padawancy.

Top 3 Random KDFD facts that I absolutely love:

Remember how in the original series Fudou would steal the ball from Kidou, making him fall to wake him up from his Kage-induced-trance? Well in the game he doesn’t do that. In the game he goes up to Kidou and SLAPS the Hell out of him. One. Single. Powerful. Slap. To Kidou Yuuto, the Absolute Leader of the pitch, the genius playmaker. Right in front of EVERYONE!  And that’s so much more powerful than stealing his ball, it shows a deeper, more intimate and direct connection between them, because you don’t go slap a stranger or someone that you don’t care about, even if they’re annoying. Also, I love how he just doesn’t care about who Kidou is, he needs to get his shit together and he will slap him into it.

In Ares they both have the number 19. And yes, I know I tend to read too much into stuff but listen, let a girl dream ok?  Anyway, the 19 is divisible only by number 1 and itself, it’s made from the first and last single-digit numbers and that makes the 19 a number of completion, a number of beginning (1) and end (9). In the number’s symbolism number 19 is an auspicious number being associated with success and honor. This number is filled with joy and happiness. ALSO, the tarot card number 19 is The Sun. This card, when upright, represent a time when you can finally see the path ahead of you and through the hardship you have endured, you have attained a new level of insight and understanding. The Sun reversed indicates that finding the positive aspects to a particular situation may prove to be difficult. Your direction and path ahead may have become clouded or distorted in some way. Nonetheless, the Sun is never a negative card, so this is only temporary. The obstacles you see can be easily removed if you put your mind to it.  And honestly? This sounds a lot like them to me, with all the troubles they have to go through and their hard-working souls, always striving to be better.

This one is my absolute favourite that I kept for last! Fudou’s voice actor once said, while talking about Fudou, “I want him (Fudou) to breathe life into Kidou whenever he loses his way”. Let it sink. This is just…so goddamn beautiful and…and I don’t even know, it sums up their relationship so well? And it’s tied to point one of this mini list yes, but also to every other time Fudou pushed Kidou to surpass his limits and just snap out of his self-doubts? Gods I love this quote so much and to think that the actual voice actor said it is!!!! AMAZING! But you know what’s even MORE amazing? You guessed it: read more into it! So, “breathe life” in a more scientific key can be translated into breathing oxygen into someone’s lungs to bring it back to life. And do you know what’s the atomic number of Oxygen in chemistry? The number 8. Fudou, breathing life so oxygen, Fudou having the number 8 on his shirt, EVERYTHING FITS LEVEL5 I KNOW WHAT YOU DID THERE!

And this is it, sorry I just wanted to share a bit of what I love the most about my dear OTP (that from now on I’ll tag also as 8O like in 8atomic number of Oxygen, because I always give dumb tags to everything)

(also I’m tagging @ygreczed bc FINALLY I did that thing about their new shirt numbers yay!)

So this realization came to me like a fucking lightning bolt, and I submit for your approval…

The OT3: [it was impossible to find a picture with Jaskier, Yennefer, and Geralt together I did my best]

The bottom:

The bottom who thinks he’s a top:

And the top:

Ossus - Temple Ruins

The Minimalist Character Sheet

So I am not the biggest fan of those ten page character sheets that include 100 questions like “What’s their favourite ice cream?”. Don’t get me wrong: If those help you with your writing, more power to you! Do what works for you. But I tend to discover all the little details of a character while writing. I only need the fundamental things. Maybe this works for you too!

The Basics

Name: including all nicknames, titles, etc.

Gender

Age

Role in the Narrative

Physical Description: focus on defining features

GMC (If you want to learn more about the concept, check out this post.)

Internal Goal

Internal Motivation

Internal Conflict

External Goal

External Motivation

External Conflict

Personality

Short characterization: internal personality and external behavior

Their biggest failure/issue/flaw: and how it impacts their life/personality/behavior

Backstory: and its consequences, such as triggers

Speech pattern: at least three speech marks that emphasize their personality (if you want to learn more about speech patterns, check out this post)

Behaviour pattern: at least three habits that emphasize their personality

Character Arc: where do they start, how do they change, where do they end?

That’s it! Hope this gave you some pointers on how to start out with character creation.

Have fun writing!

Commission for @phoenixyfriend of older Ahsoka and baby Glitch for her fic Parole Officer Fulcrum Steals Three Million Babies

Thanks for commissioning me, I had a lot of fun with this one! <3 

Part of the reason that Han, Luke and Leia work so well as the main trio is that they're all mistakenly under the impression that they're the sane one in a 'two idiots and the voice of reason' trio trope. Like "Somebody has to save our skins!" and someone has to stop Han and Leia from murdering eachother mid lovers spat, and someone has to keep the twins out of trouble involving force nonsense. And they're all equally as much trouble as eachother, but they all think they're the only sane person. And it's wonderful.

"Ya want to stop? Gettin' tired won't help anyone, ya know?" - Kurosaki Yukine

"Again. I'll get it right this time." - Tsurugi Kyousuke

Haha I'm having emotions~

Okay, secretly, or not so secretly, I really like the idea of Dooku and Ahsoka as a duo?? Nno no listen, it's wholesome I know nobody cares butT

I like Dooku as he was prior to the Disneyfication of Star Wars. The guydude who called Obi Wan his grandson before asking Palpanite to spare his life? That one, your honor.

Cause my HC (supported by Episode 3 zhe novel and Labyrith of Evil) is that after losing Qui, Dooku did an oopsie. He channeled the dark side. Maybe it was just for a moment. But somehow, in the old story, Dooku finds Darth Sidious on his own, he figures it out or senses him. Doesn't tell any of the Jedi cause fuck those losers they let his padawan die! and he goes to wreck Palpatene's ass (But Palpitane got in his head, and yeah..)

Before all that, Dooku was supposed to take Yoda's place as the next Grand Master of the Order. (I haven't read that, somebody told me that. Idk how credible it is, but I dig it as an idea and I think it makes sense)

My point is, I assume that losing Qui Gon was a big deal to Dooku. A big enough deal to throw his entire life and work out the windu. On top of that, I think Ahsoka and Qui Gon share some personality traits that I find important in this case: they're both stubborn imps, they value the work of a Jedi more than the title of a Jedi, they both look inward for answers, they're both Consulares, etc.

Putting all of this together, if I could add something to Dooku's story, it would be him meeting Ahsoka as a baby.

No I will not shut up about this ☝️☝️☝️

Because Dooku was a bad bitch but a good politician, and thought slavery was barbaric, it wouldn't be impossible for him to sense Ahsoka while visiting Shili on a "diplomatic" mission? He'd also have the money to pay off the imposter Jedi or have the skill to, at least, expose them.

(I see Dooku as the Qui Gon of the Sith btw. Like they're both very grey but on opposite sides of the spectrum..)

Dooku would take Ahsoka with him but he wouldn't tell Pilpitine. Dooku wouldn't trust that Ddried up cucumbér and more importantly, Dooku might've been angry with the Jedi but he didn't hate them like Anakin did. Dooku would take Ahsoka with the intention of giving her to the Order.

He would call someone like Master Plo, someone trustworthy, because I think Dooku didn't regret his decision for leaving the Jedi. But he might have regretted leaving without somebody there to replace him?

If Qui Gon was alive and Dooku still fell to the dark somehow, he'd have left knowing Qui Gon was there.

I think Ahsoka embodies a lot of the Jedi spirit™ that Qui Gon had and the heart or Hope that Luke has. If Dooku had met her it would help heal some of his wounds and subsequently pull him away from the dark side. If only by a little tiny bit.

But it would be enough, if over time he watched her grow by his grandpadawan's and Anakin's side. It would take more energy for him to channel his powers and it would add to his weakened state if he suddenly had hope!

In the beginning of Episode 3, he loses to Anakin a little too easily (and pls I don't wanna hear about Anakin being the chosen one, he could be Avril Lavigne's double for all I care here). And in many versions of the story it's said that the Dark Side feeds on the people that use it and weakens them. Like what force lightning did to Pilpatene.

👉👈

Okay I'll come clean.

I hate when characters just die and nothing happens. Dooku died and nothing happened.

But if he knew Ahsoka was still somewhere out there. If he had pulled some strings here and there to ensure her safety? Then that means Dooku died with a little bit of hope... And that's what Star Wars is all ABOOT!!!

And I would have them meet again when Ahsoka had to battle her darker emotions inbetween Episode 3 and and the Mandalorian BUT that's another talk for another time when I'm on crack and need to scream about them again

Boop

Thank you!

I, please?

I: Do you have a guilty pleasure in fic (reading or writing)?

Oh boy definitely for both. AU crossovers are one of my biggest guilty pleasure both in reading and writing (as if having written a nora.gami AU and bn.ha AU wasn’t enough proof. and I’m still writing that bn.a AU and pok.emon ranger. and I was planning a twe.wy one-)

and just about anything angsty with a happy ending is my biggest guilty pleasure, I’m pretty much guaranteed to read that stuff whenever I find it.

Some tropes like coffee shop and rivals to lovers make me weak too- and fantasy/monster stuff