I Just Wrote Over 2,500 Words After Not Writing For A Year. Just Feels Amazing To Know That It Doesn't

Forever indebted to @mostlysignssomeportents for this one. 

ok but like when did self-sacrifice become synonymous with death? writers seem to have forgotten that people can make personal sacrifices for the greater good without giving their lives. plots about self-sacrifice and selflessness don’t always have to end in death. suffering doesn’t have to be mourning. you can create drama and emotional depth on your show without killing everyone. learn to explore the meaning of living rather than dying

Hello! Would you mind doing an example of not using filter words in a first person point of view? While I know that you can just switch out the pronouns for I/me/my, I just want to see it in action and when you should (and shouldn't) use the filter words. Thank you!

Hi there! I would love to! I think I’ll start out with an example with filter words and then cut out the filter words to show you the difference.

For those of you who haven’t seen my post on Filter Words.

Now, for the example:

I felt a hand tap my shoulder as I realized I had made a huge mistake. I knew the consequences would be unsettling, but I had no other choice. I saw the light of my desk lamp bounce off of the officer’s badge before I had even turned around. It seemed like I always found my way into trouble.

It was the first thing off the top of my head, so it’s a bit rough sounding….

Now for without filter words (And a bit of revision):

A hand tapped my shoulder as it dawned on me: I had just made a huge mistake. The consequences would be unsettling if I didn’t get out of this mess, but I had no other choice. The light of my desk lamp bounced off of the officer’s badge. I always found my way into trouble.

By taking out filter words, you get right to the point.

I’d also like to add a few more notes that I didn’t have the chance to post previously.

Some Examples of Filtering:

I heard a noise in the hallway.

She felt embarrassed when she tripped.

I saw a light bouncing through the trees.

I tasted the sour tang of raspberries bursting on my tongue.

He smelled his teammate’s BO wafting through the locker room.

She remembered dancing at his wedding.

I think people should be kinder to one another.

How can you apply this?

Read your work to see how many of these filtering words you might be leaning on. Microsoft Word has a great Find and Highlight feature that I love to use when I’m editing. See how you can get rid of these filtering words and take your sentences to the next level by making stronger word choices. Take the above examples, and see how they can be reworked.

FILTERING EXAMPLE: I heard a noise in the hallway.

DESCRIBE THE SOUND: Heels tapped a staccato rhythm in the hallway.

FILTERING EXAMPLE: She felt embarrassed after she tripped.

DESCRIBE WHAT THE FEELING LOOKS LIKE: Her cheeks flushed and her shoulders hunched after she tripped.

FILTERING EXAMPLE: I saw a light bouncing through the trees.

DESCRIBE THE SIGHT: A light bounced through the trees.

FILTERING EXAMPLE: I tasted the sour tang of raspberries bursting on my tongue.

DESCRIBE THE TASTE: The sour tang of raspberries burst on my tongue.

FILTERING EXAMPLE: He smelled his teammate’s BO wafting through the locker room.

DESCRIBE THE SMELL: His teammate’s BO wafted through the locker room.

FILTERING EXAMPLE: She remembered dancing at his wedding.

DESCRIBE THE MEMORY: She had danced at his wedding.

FILTERING EXAMPLE: I think people should be kinder to one another.

DESCRIBE THE THOUGHT: People should be kinder to one another.

See what a difference it makes when you get rid of the filter? It’s simply not necessary to use them. By ditching them, you avoid “telling,” your voice is more active, and your pacing is helped along.

The above list is not comprehensive as there are many examples of filtering words. The idea is to be aware of the concept so that you can recognize instances of it happening in your work. Be aware of where you want to place the energy and power in your sentences. Let your observations flow through your characters with immediacy.

Ok, sorry for the lengthy answer, I know you just wanted an example…. sorry!

If you have any questions, feel free to ask at my ask box

More favourite tropes:

Character responds to legitimate and urgent concern with reassurances only tangentially related to the thing folks are worried about

Character takes advantage of others’ false assumptions about their skill-set or identity, then when caught out, defends themselves by pointing out how unreasonable those assumptions were

Character’s argument for why they couldn’t possibly have done what they’re accused of accidentally cops to a different, unrelated offence

Character caught doing something suspicious offers an explanation that makes it clear they have a completely different understanding what it is that needs justifying than the person asking the questions does

Character attempts to brazen their way out of a compromising position by pretending to be unaware of an object they’re holding in their hands

Character apparently displays great bravery in the face of overwhelming peril, only for it to become clear after the fact that they had no idea the threat existed

Character reassures others that a particular problem is nothing to worry about by pointing out another, far more urgent problem

Character reveals that they possess some skill or resource that would have allowed them to save the day at any time, but didn’t realise it was relevant until just then

Character threatens a would-be assailant with an innocuous object they insist against all appearances is actually a deadly weapon

Character brightly announces they’ve solved the problem at hand, then proceeds to reveal that they’ve completely misidentified what the problem actually is

this is almost certainly a post ive made before but when a character's grief is so strong it fully alters the form of the narrative itself... moby dick being so much longer than strictly necessary because ishmael's grief made him stall for time in the telling of the tragedy... harrow the ninth being in second person because harrow was so grief-stricken that she herself was not capable of making narrative sense of the events of the novel and so someone else had to do it.... do u know what i mean

Colmar in Alsace, France (via vsco.co)

Words to replace said, except this actually helps

I got pretty fed up with looking for words to replace said because they weren’t sorted in a way I could easily use/find them for the right time. So I did some myself.

IN RESPONSE TO Acknowledged Answered Protested

INPUT/JOIN CONVERSATION/ASK Added Implored Inquired Insisted Proposed Queried Questioned Recommended Testified

GUILTY/RELUCTANCE/SORRY Admitted Apologized Conceded Confessed Professed

FOR SOMEONE ELSE Advised Criticized Suggested

JUST CHECKING Affirmed Agreed Alleged Confirmed

LOUD Announced Chanted Crowed

LEWD/CUTE/SECRET SPY FEEL Appealed Disclosed Moaned

ANGRY FUCK OFF MATE WANNA FIGHT Argued Barked Challenged Cursed Fumed Growled Hissed Roared Swore

SMARTASS Articulated Asserted Assured Avowed Claimed Commanded Cross-examined Demanded Digressed Directed Foretold Instructed Interrupted Predicted Proclaimed Quoted Theorized

ASSHOLE Bellowed Boasted Bragged

NERVOUS TRAINWRECK Babbled Bawled Mumbled Sputtered Stammered Stuttered

SUAVE MOTHERFUCKER Bargained Divulged Disclosed Exhorted

FIRST OFF Began

LASTLY Concluded Concurred

WEAK PUSY Begged Blurted Complained Cried Faltered Fretted

HAPPY/LOL Cajoled Exclaimed Gushed Jested Joked Laughed

WEIRDLY HAPPY/EXCITED Extolled Jabbered Raved

BRUH, CHILL Cautioned Warned

ACTUALLY, YOU’RE WRONG Chided Contended Corrected Countered Debated Elaborated Objected Ranted Retorted

CHILL SAVAGE Commented Continued Observed Surmised

LISTEN BUDDY Enunciated Explained Elaborated Hinted Implied Lectured Reiterated Recited Reminded Stressed

BRUH I NEED U AND U NEED ME Confided Offered Urged

FINE Consented Decided

TOO EMO FULL OF EMOTIONS Croaked Lamented Pledged Sobbed Sympathized Wailed Whimpered

JUST SAYING Declared Decreed Mentioned Noted Pointed out Postulated Speculated Stated Told Vouched

WASN’T ME Denied Lied

EVIL SMARTASS Dictated Equivocated Ordered Reprimanded Threatened

BORED Droned Sighed

SHHHH IT’S QUIET TIME Echoed Mumbled Murmured Muttered Uttered Whispered

DRAMA QUEEN Exaggerated Panted Pleaded Prayed Preached

OH SHIT Gasped Marveled Screamed Screeched Shouted Shrieked Yelped Yelled

ANNOYED Grumbled Grunted Jeered Quipped Scolded Snapped Snarled Sneered

ANNOYING Nagged

I DON’T REALLY CARE BUT WHATEVER Guessed Ventured

I’M DRUNK OR JUST BEING WEIRDLY EXPRESSIVE FOR A POINT/SARCASM Hooted Howled Yowled

I WONDER Pondered Voiced Wondered

OH, YEAH, WHOOPS Recalled Recited Remembered

SURPRISE BITCH Revealed

IT SEEMS FAKE BUT OKAY/HA ACTUALLY FUNNY BUT I DON’T WANT TO LAUGH OUT LOUD Scoffed Snickered Snorted

BITCHY Tattled Taunted Teased

some people think writers are so eloquent and good with words, but the reality is that we can sit there with our fingers on the keyboard going, “what’s the word for non-sunlight lighting? Like, fake lighting?” and for ten minutes, all our brain will supply is “unofficial”, and we know that’s not the right word, but it’s the only word we can come up with…until finally it’s like our face got smashed into a brick wall and we remember the word we want is “artificial”.

“these stars are for you, child.”

‘Knock on Wood’, beds sculpted out of wood. Click for more beautiful pieces by Jeffro Uitto.