I Have Decided That One Of My Favorite Things About The Magnus Archives Is That The One Of The Only Unsexualized

So... Could we talk about volume 94 for a sec?

Like, first oh all, Eiichiro Oda, how dare you. I've been crying for an entire day about characters that I swore I wouldn't care about.

So: Here we are at the beginning of the chapter, where there's the explanation of why SMILEs are bad etc. etc. etc. AND I'M ALREADY BAWLING MY EYES OUT.

Then the narrative switches to Luffy being chaotic on main, I thought I was gonna have fun, but no. Those two come in.

A classic. Kidd's *angy* and Kamazo's laughing like the maniac that he is-

Oh wait.

What if he... isn't a maiac...but is in fact a SMILE eater?

That would make sense, but why would Kaido not keep this man with him? Is he a native from Wano, from the poor district?

Then Kidd, who I read went back to prison with Kamazo without making too much of a fight (which is already fucking suspicious) decides to speak.

And. I. Start. Crying.

He starts talking about the crew and "WHERE THE FUCK ARE THEY?" and Killer can't stop laughing because he literally c a n ' t express any other emotion anymore and I CRY SO HARD.

In each and every scene Killer keeps laughing and laughing, and the more he does that the more I realize that he's doing that instead of crying and I feel bad about not caring more about the Kidd Pirates-

Like...look at them.

They look so broken.

With Nastya not having a death in DTTM... And the whole mechanisms running on belief.... She never stopped believing she was immortal.

Nastya finds Brian's body first, and she's certain he's just glitching, just stuck in some sort or statis.

She doesn't think he's dead, because the more logical explanation here is that somehow he ended up in space, and its been awhile. Clearly it's a mix between the trauma he already has from space and the harsh environment, and if she fixes him, he'll wake up.

That's how it's always worked.

And that's how it does.

He wakes up gasping and wheezing, gears spinning to life as his heart continues to best beat beat

He explains everything to her, but he's alive, his gears are spinning, and he figures he was never really dead.

The new truth is they can come close to dying, but never cross that line.

They can brush against death, but never sink into it.

Someone will always wake them up.

The first time it was the doctor for many of them, and with their shared belief that they arnt actually dead, the second they are torn into the living by Brian and Nastya, and whoever for up before them.

The universe has more stories for them to tell, and the lull in belief was just a new arc of their tales.

They wake up Jonny last, because no one is sure they really should, a long time after the others.

Ashes brings up he only got so truely desperate to die after Nastya left, gestures at Nastya, who shrinks a bit.

Tim remarks that he forgave Jonny got being selfish and bringing him back once already, and honestly its just fucking karma.

But since they all believe themselves immortal, that they cannot die. Only come tantalizingly close (exept the ever doubtful Marius) they believe that they will wake up from this. They believe that Jonny will wake up from this.

So Jonny's hand breaks through the dirt of his grave, and a particularly pissed off Jonny D'ville drags himself from the earth. "Why the fuck did you assholes let them bury me?"

every day is a gamble with murdoc, it’s the constant thought of “what kind of acts against humanity is the green twink gonna commit today?” that keeps the band on their toes

this is kinda late but here you go

So, I just begun listening to the Magnus Archives Podcast; and even if I could stay here hours to talk about how much I love it already, I'm here to be my dumbass self:

I'm here to talk about the episode 16: "Arachnophobia"

The first thing you gotta know about why I feel like this about this episode, is that I'm in no way shape or form arachnophobic; I love spooders with all my heart and to me, they're only the arachnid equivalent of the danger noodles (which I also love, but I'm not here to talk about this).

Second thing is that when I'm scared, I try to empathize with the villain and not the protagonist of the horror I'm watching, or in this case, listening to.

In this Episode, Carlos Vittery explains how he moved to this flat to find the thing he had been fleeing from: spiders.

But tell me, just tell me, that I wasn't the only one to think how good must've felt the spider the second Carlos saw him on the TV screen.

I just imagine Carlos trying to grasp at his sanity while this little shit just makes fortnite dances on his tv screen, while giving him a metaphorical middle finger.

Mike crew and Simon fairchild meet once on an airplane and it goes like this

Mike: *throws someone off the plane so that they are falling for all eternity*

Simon: hey I was gonna do that. Who are u?

Mike: I'm Mike, I work for the vast. Who are u?

Simon: I'm simon and I work for the vast

Mike: wait if I work for the vast and u work for the vast, then who's flying this plane?

Simon and Mike both laugh hysterically as the plane begins to experience severe turbulence. The passengers all scream.

I was expecting a quiet little episode, AND I GOT SIMON FUCKING FAIRCHILD-

I already loved the concept of an old man flying out planes for fun... Hearing him interact with people, FUCK.

I love his character already... I can't say I'm disappointed.

Gotta love the duality of Peter Lukas!

One second he's being all funny;

And the other he brings me an ungodly amount of unbridled rage

If you've seen the finale of season four, you know what I'm talking about.

I swear to fuck if he, all this time, has been working with Elias to "UnLeASh tHE aRcHIviST's tRue PoWeR" I will wreak havoc.

Art by Betty Jiang

"I do! It's me! I'm listening! And a hefty bunch of other people around the world-"